


His Master's Voice: Regressions

by fhsa_archivist



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Adult Content, Alternate Universe, BDSM, Domestic Discipline
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-06-27
Updated: 2006-07-29
Packaged: 2019-02-05 16:09:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 136,655
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12797907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fhsa_archivist/pseuds/fhsa_archivist
Summary: These stories are part of the series His Master's Voice.  They are the past lives of a Master and his slave.





	1. I: Rome

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Haven, the archivist: This story was originally archived at [Fandom Haven Story Archive (FHSA)](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Fandom_Haven_Story_Archive), was scheduled to shut down at the end of 2016. To preserve the archive, I began working with the OTW to transfer the stories to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2017. If you are this creator and the work hasn't transferred to your AO3 account, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Fandom Haven Story Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/fhsa/profile).

In this story, one of the characters is vastly underaged for our modern sensitivities, though perfectly acceptable for the time and culture the story is set in.

Seriously, if you consider anything under the age of 16 to be underaged, please, think twice before reading this. If you consider anything under the age of 18 to be underaged, please, please, do us both a favour and don't read it.

 

http://www.geocities.com/peach1250/master/regressionrome.html


	2. II: Constantinople the First Crusade

My cousin, the Emperor, had insisted that I attend this dinner he was giving for yet another group of those smelly, unwashed, ignorant men from god knew where. I was so bored with this influx of foreigners. But, my presence was requested, so I dressed in my best and left my chambers to attend.

 

I was seated at the table near my cousin where I could look over the rabble. I asked the servant who was at my side for the name of the leader of the group who would be arriving soon. I was told his name was Duke Robert of Normandy. A name I had heard, his father William being well known in much of the world. I waited, expecting the same boredom as normal.

 

Little did I know that it would be a life changing night.

 

The Duke was announced and I looked up, curious to see this man who would succeed his father if he lived through the coming campaign. At least he was better dressed than most. He turned and gestured and my boredom flew away.

 

A tall, powerfully built man entered the room to join the Duke. He stood head and shoulders above most of his companions. His shoulders broad, muscles rippling under the rough clothing he wore. His hairline was receding, which made me take him to be older than the Duke. A judgment that would prove untrue when I saw him closer. He stood proud beside his Duke, telling me that he was related or a close advisor.

 

I motioned for the servant to come forward. "Find out who the big man is and where he is housed."

 

Things were definitely no longer boring. I watched as my cousin spoke with the Duke about his troops and saw that he referred many of the questions to his big companion. So, not just an advisor but probably an officer. His voice when he spoke was deep, commanding and went straight to my crotch.

 

When the servant returned, he leaned to whisper in my ear.

 

"Master, the big man is Sir Walter of Normandy. He is a distant relative of the Duke. His shield carries a bar sinister. It is reported that he is respected for his leadership in battle. He does not just issue commands and watch his men die, he fights at their side. One man said he is such a fierce warrior that none dare disobey for fear of his anger. They also say that the Duke looks on him almost as a brother."

 

"And where is he housed?"

 

"The Emperor gave them housing just inside the palace gates."

 

"Good. Wait for him to return to his housing and bring him to me."

 

I turned my attention back to the meal in front of me as my cousin raised an eyebrow at me. I smiled, turned to look at Sir Walter, and turned back to look at my cousin. He frowned slightly at me before turning his attention back to the Duke.

 

I spent the rest of the meal watching Sir Walter. I noticed that his hands were big, strong but well cared for. The nails were short and clean. So, a man who washed more than once a year. He would probably enjoy my bath and it was a perfect excuse. Calling another servant to my side, I gave instructions for the bath to be readied. Telling him also to note what the big man liked.

 

When the meal had been eaten, my cousin motioned for me to join him. I moved forward to the seat that had been vacated for me next to him.

 

"Alexius, this is Duke Robert of Normandy and his cousin Sir Walter of Normandy. Duke Robert, Sir Walter, this is my cousin and advisor also named Alexius. He holds a rank of general in my army and the title of Nobilissimus."

 

I made a slight bow to the Duke and extended my hand in a warrior's gesture of alliance to Sir Walter. He looked surprised but took my extended hand in return. I trailed my fingers over his forearm and down to his palm as we pulled back from the grip of our hands. His eyes widened but that was the only outward sign he made.

 

My cousin indicated that we were to be seated and the night's entertainment began. My cousin was quite fond of showing off the abilities of our musicians, singers, and dancers. I noticed the Duke was quite pleased with the displays. Sir Walter stayed aloof from the proceeding. Although, once when I looked his way, I found him watching me. His eyes shifted quickly back to the dancers.

 

I felt the Emperor's hand on my sleeve and leaned toward him. "Alexius, I think you should forget this one. The Normans do not look on sex as freely as we do. You try something with him and you may get hurt. I'd hate to alienate the Duke by having to kill his knight."

 

"Cousin, don't you think I can handle myself with him?"

 

"He's a big man. I saw him practicing with his sword earlier. He swings that heavy weapon as if it were weightless. He could break you easily. I've heard as well that he has a hot temper."

 

"Don't worry. He wants what I have to give him, he just doesn't know it yet."

 

I raised my eyes to look over his shoulder to see Sir Walter watching me again. This time his eyes locked with mine. I used my tongue to wet my lips slowly and smiled at the way his eyes tracked the movement. He pulled in a ragged breath and turned to watch the dancers again.

 

I was now impatient for the evening to end but pleased with how often I found Sir Walter's eyes turned my way. Once my cousin retired with Duke Robert for some private counsel, I retired to my chambers to prepare for what I was sure would be an enjoyable night.

 

***

 

I had come to Constantinople with my cousin, Duke Robert, more because I was restless than for any hope of glory. I was a widower in no hurry to remarry.

 

Sex for me was always quick, with some whore near the many places my sword took me. And then not often, as I did not seem to need the release as often as some men do. Most women seemed to find my size frightening so that too detracted from the experience.

 

Dinner with the Emperor had been an eye opening experience. His palace was opulent, having rich marble floors, beautiful multicoloured rugs here and there for warmth, brightly coloured frescos, finely carved statues of mythical beasts and beautiful men.

 

And the clothing everyone wore, why even the servants were better dressed than most of the royalty of my homeland.

 

I was surprised when the Emperor's cousin extended his hand to me, even more surprised when his fingers trailed softly over my arm and palm as we released the hold. As I tried to watch the evening's entertainment, my eyes were drawn again and again to him. My hand still tingled from his touch. Each time I brought my hand near my face, I could smell his delicate scent, far more subtle and enticing than the others in the room.

 

I could not tell much about his body under the clothing he wore but his face was as delicate as any woman. His eyes a vivid green that would make an emerald jealous. Eyelashes so long when he blinked they fluttered as butterflies on his cheeks. His lips the soft pink normally only seen on newborn babes.

 

At one point our eyes met over the Emperor's shoulder and I couldn't look away as he slowly licked his lips, while his eyes sparkled at me. I drew in a deep ragged breath when I realized that my cock had hardened as he smiled at me.

 

I wasn't sure what was happening. I had never reacted this way to anyone in my life. Certainly never a man! I was very glad my cousin's attention was on the entertainment. He always read me far too well and questions were the last thing I wanted at this time.

 

I was very glad when the evening ended, wanting only to find my bed and the release my hand could bring me.

 

That was not to be.

 

A servant was waiting outside the room I had been given. He jumped to his feet and bowed to me.

 

"Sir, my master requests that you visit him in his chambers. If you will come with me, I will take you there."

 

"And who is your master?"

 

"Nobilissimus Alexius, sir."

 

"Please offer my apologies to your master. I am far too tired and wish to seek my rest."

 

"Please, noble sir, do not send me back with that message. I will be killed if I return without you."

 

"He would kill you for *my* refusal? Is your master that cruel?"

 

"My master is very kind because I never disobey him. Are servants not punished for disobedience in your country?"

 

"Yes, they are. But beaten, not killed. I will come with you."

 

I followed him back the way I had just come, noting a few curious looks from the men as I walked back toward the palace. Instead of leading me in the way I had entered earlier, he led me to a smaller entrance on the east side of the palace. We traversed a series of hallways that had me hopelessly confused and finally arrived at a doorway. He knocked politely and the door was opened by another servant. Bowing, he left me there as the other servant stood aside for me to enter.

 

"Noble sir, if you will follow me, I will show you where you may undress. The master is waiting for you in the bathing chamber."

 

"Now wait a minute. I did not come here to join your master in his bathing chamber. I was asked to come here and I am here but I will not be undressing. Tell your master I will attend him tomorrow, since he is obviously not ready for guests."

 

"Sir Walter, I thought you might find our bathing methods restful after a day of practicing your skills for battle."

 

I turned toward the sound of that deep almost raspy voice, my cock thickening with desire. He was standing in the archway, naked, gleaming with the water that was running down his body. None of the statues in the palace could have competed with him.

 

His body of the same height as mine but lighter. Defined muscles but not heavy like mine. The swords used by his people being lighter required less mass to wield. My eyes tracked down to see his cock lying heavy against his thigh. I jerked my eyes back up to his face to find a slight grin there.

 

All my attention was on the beautiful naked man standing both too close and too far from me. Had I turned at that moment and run, I might have escaped but I doubt it.

 

I was well and truly his from that moment forward.

 

His hand raised, open and beckoning. I held out my hand and let him lead me to his bathing chamber. I stood quietly as his skilful servants undressed me. Followed him to the pool. Accepted the goblet of wine he gave me before dismissing the servants with a wave of his hand.

 

***

 

I heard Sir Walter's voice and, by the tone, I knew I would have to intervene. My servant would not withstand the heat I heard. I rose quickly from the pool and went to the archway. He was standing with his back to me, his stance giving away his anger. I have been told many times that my voice has a lasting impact on people, especially when I let it dip into the deeper range.

 

"Sir Walter, I thought you might find our bathing methods restful after a day of practicing your skills for battle."

 

He turned toward me where I stood casually naked, water still running down my body. I suppressed the smile that wanted to grace my mouth. No, gloating would not be the best way to seduce this man. I moved my hand as if rubbing my thigh, knowing a warrior would automatically track any movement. It had the desired effect of drawing his eyes down to my crotch.

 

I couldn't entirely suppress my good humour as his eyes jerked back up to my face, but I kept it to a slight grin.

 

I held out my hand and he placed his in it. He stood unresisting as the servants undressed him. I was pleased to see the beginning of his arousal. He flushed but made no move to cover himself. He sank into the pool with a sigh as the warmth of the water covered his body. I pressed a goblet of strong wine in his hand and settled next to him in the pool.

 

"Do you like this, Sir Walter? Is the perfume pleasing to you?"

 

"The water feels very nice. As for the scent, my men will probably laugh themselves silly when they whiff me."

 

"We are very conscious of body odours here. We bathe often. In my case, daily when I am at home. I prefer to have a clean body, especially when I make love."

 

He didn't meet my eyes as he spoke hesitantly. "Is it true then, what I hear about the men here?"

 

"What have you heard, Sir Walter?"

 

"I think since we're sitting naked together in a pool you may call me Walter. Do men lie together here? I've heard that it is acceptable for men to have sex together in your culture."

 

"Yes, it is accepted. Encouraged by some. A man will fight harder in battle if he fights at his lover's side."

 

"And you practice this?"

 

"When I find someone attractive and he is willing, yes. I find the tight passage of a man far more pleasurable than entering a woman."

 

At this his eyes met mine. I could almost hear the thoughts passing in his mind. Even in the least repressed cultures, most men are willing to penetrate but being penetrated is seen as weak. I had not expected him to ask such direct questions. Although I was not displeased that he had. Better to have him know what I wanted then to get going and have him panic. As my cousin had said, he was big and could harm me.

 

He was quiet a long time, sitting just sipping his wine. When he spoke again, I was surprised at the question.

 

"Do you ever allow a man to take his pleasure in your body?"

 

I looked into his eyes seeking to know why he asked this but they were calm, steady, with no information to be had. Something in his straightforward manner made me want him all the more. I wasn't sure why, since he was so different from the type of man I usually wanted in my bed.

 

I normally bedded men whom I knew I could best physically. Men who were smaller than me. Pretty boys actually. Boys who were well versed in the ways of pleasing a man.

 

Now, I wanted to bed this man. A man I would need to train to please me. A man I *wanted* to please.

 

"No. I've never allowed anyone that privilege. Does that make you less inclined to see where this could lead?"

 

"So, I was not invited here merely to enjoy the bathing facilities?"

 

"You are the first man to share my bath. My lovers normally come to me from their own baths."

 

"Normans are a filthy breed? I needed cleaning before using, is that it?"

 

"Most of your countrymen smell, Walter. You do not. But then it is obvious that you are far different than most of your countrymen."

 

"It is, is it? That's good to know. Is that why you thought I might be agreeable to sharing your bed? That is why you asked me here, isn't it?"

 

His eyes held mine, waiting. I smiled at him then, the smile most people never see. I moved closer to him reaching to find his already erect cock. I pushed the foreskin back and ran my thumb over and around the glans. His head dropped back, eyes closing, as a low groan escaped his throat. I dropped my mouth to his throat and bit lightly.

 

His hand closed around my wrist in a tight grip. I kept my thumb moving slowly as I waited to see what he would do. His eyes opened, filled with lust and something I couldn't quite figure out.

 

"I've never done anything like this. I've only bedded whores and not many of those. My size scares most women."

 

I squeezed his cock gently, "Your size pleases me. Allow me to show you the pleasures of my bed. The pleasure no woman could ever give to you."

 

***

 

I released his wrist and was rewarded with another one of those dazzling smiles. A part of my mind asked what the hell was I doing? The primal part that knows only rutting shoved the inquiring part down deep. When he stood and offered his hand, I took it willingly, allowing him to lead me trailing water behind us to his bed.

 

His arms wrapped around me as he kissed me for the first time. Whores don't need to be courted with kisses so kissing was not a skill I had acquired. His mouth was as sweet as honey and as soft as a kitten's fur.

 

When his tongue sought entrance to my mouth, I opened willingly. His tongue mapped every tooth and the contour of my mouth. When his tongue withdrew, I followed it with my own. He made a growling sound deep in his throat and sucked gently, pulling it deeper in him.

 

When he pulled back to let us breathe, I noticed that his eyes were a deeper green than before. He smiled as his fingers trailed up over my ribs to fondle then pinch my nipples. I had never thought of my nipples as being a source of pleasure but my back arched of its own volition to keep contact with his strong fingers. When he bent his head to take one in his mouth, I nearly screamed. It felt as though my nipple was directly connected to my cock.

 

My cock was harder then it had ever been. His every touch adding to the fire. When he worked his way down my body and pulled my cockhead into his mouth, I did scream. I exploded in his mouth and blushed with shame that I had come so quickly and easily for him. His only response was to lick me clean then kiss and suck his way back up my body.

 

His voice was a low throaty purr next to my ear, "You taste good."

 

"My lord, I'm sorry. I don't usually….."

 

"Shhhh. We have all night. I'm going to make this so good for you. I'm going to make you forget anyone else has ever touched you."

 

I had never been so out of control in my life. His every touch, every word, every kiss pulling me deeper into his web. I had never known such lust, such fire. He played my body until he had me hard again. I went readily onto to my stomach when he whispered for me to turn over.

 

He moved away from me then and I moaned at the loss of contact. One hand reached back to soothe me. I tensed as he straddled my legs. One strong hand rubbed gently over my ass, as his voice coated me with honey.

 

"Easy, Walter. I need to get you ready for me. I don't want to cause you any pain."

 

One knee pushed between my legs and I spread my thighs for him. I clutched a pillow to me as he kissed down my spine, leaving a trail of fire behind. I bucked when his tongue ran down over my hole. I whimpered when he sucked first one then the other of my balls into his mouth, laving them with his tongue. He moved back up to thoroughly lick my hole until I was on the verge of screaming again.

 

I was so relaxed from all his oral attention that I barely registered when the first finger entered me. The second got my attention as it brought with it a slight burning. His mouth found a spot on my throat that I never knew existed and I forgot the fingers as the new sensation took all my attention.

 

The third finger brought a sharp jolt as he found yet another spot I didn't know I had. At my groan of pleasure, he twisted his fingers to rub the spot again. 

 

"Feels good, doesn't it?"

 

I sucked in enough breath to hiss "Yesssss," as he rubbed harder on that spot. The logical part of my mind tried to awaken again. By the Virgin's sweet blood, was I giving this man control? I was bigger, stronger, and older. If anyone was going to be used here, it should be me using him.

 

But there was something so familiar about him, about this. From the moment I had looked in his eyes, felt his hand gripping my arm, I knew. I *was* his. I *had* always been his. I *would* always be his. Size, strength, age, none of those things mattered. All that mattered was now, this moment in time.

 

The fingers slipped out and I growled. I heard his soft chuckle.

 

"I think you are ready. Just need some oil, to ease the way."

 

He shifted and I felt the warm oil trickle down over my hole to my balls. Then I felt *him* pushing against me. My muscles tensed. His voice instructed me to take a deep breath. Felt the burn as he breached my virgin body. His mouth sucking on my throat again.

 

The pain followed by the most intense pleasure I had ever known. His harsh breathing in my ear as he pumped in and out of my body. I arched up to meet each thrust, whimpering, moaning, wanting it to last forever.

 

He pulled me onto my knees without pulling out of me. One hand worked my cock as the other pinched a nipple. He was thrusting harder, going deep inside me, his balls slapping hard against me. I felt as though he were trying to split me in two. I would have suffered that gladly as long as he kept giving me this exquisite pleasure.

 

"Come for me, Walter. Now!" His harsh voice sending a shiver down my spine as I shot my seed onto the bed below me.

 

He slammed into me one more time. "Mine!" roared as he filled me with his come. His weight resting on my back, I slid down flat onto the bed not caring that I was lying in a pool of my own come.

 

***

 

I was panting, lying full length on his back. My mind trying to wrap around the last few minutes. I enjoyed sex. I had come spectacularly with partners in the past but this… Nothing had ever been like this. I called him mine? Where had that come from?

 

I could feel the tremors as his ass flexed around me. As if trying to milk me for more. Or maybe he was still coming. I wasn't sure. All I knew was it felt wonderful. I kissed the part of him closest to my lips. Felt the shiver that it evoked.

 

We lay there until our breathing was normal then I pulled out to the sound of a soft moan.

 

"Come on, Walter, we'll clean up."

 

He rolled over and then I saw the blood. I summoned a servant to change the bed. I led him back to the pool and we sat quietly. Another servant quietly placed food and drink beside each of us. He drank some wine but ignored the food.

 

"Did I hurt you?"

 

"A little. I've had much worse hurts."

 

I reached for him and he came into my arms without protest. We sat there for a long time, not talking, just touching.

 

He finally spoke. "I should go. I never stay away from camp all night."

 

"You can tell your cousin that you were with a whore."

 

"He knows my habits too well for that. I never spend the night with them. If I do anything to change my normal habits, he will question me. I've never been able to hide things from him."

 

"He would not approve, would he?"

 

"He might accept me using a man but he would never understand what I let happen to me here tonight. Hell! *I* don't understand why I let you do that to me."

 

"Maybe I'm your destiny."

 

"I don't believe in destiny. Please, Lord, will you have someone show me out?"

 

"If that's what you want."

 

I summoned a servant and gave orders for Walter to be escorted out. I watched silently as he dressed. He turned to leave but then swung around and kissed me, leaving me with a hunger I had never felt before. Then he was gone.

 

The next day I stood on the balcony watching the Duke's men honing their skills. Waiting to see him, but he never appeared. That night I sent a servant to summon him to me. The servant returned alone.

 

"Nobilissimus, Sir Walter has gone."

 

"Gone? Gone where?"

 

"His men say that he went with the troops that left this morning. He told them he was tired of the inactivity and wished to get on with the crusade."

 

"Leave me."

 

The servant hurried to comply, no doubt fearing that I would kill the messenger. I sent all the servants away. Standing on my balcony looking in the direction he had gone, I cursed us both as fools. Me for letting him leave the night before, him for running away, taking my heart with him. Then I prayed for his safe return.

 

***

 

The servant led me to the entrance of the palace, from there I made my way back to the quarters I had been assigned. I gave thanks to the Virgin that it was very late. I could probably get to bed without being questioned. I undressed in the room I had been given, finding my bed but not sleep for a long time.

 

The next morning when I woke up, I found that I had stained the bedclothes. Looking down at the spot, I wondered if whores had similar stains the next morning after being with me.

 

I went in search of my cousin. He didn't understand why I felt a need to rush off to the battle. He was enjoying the hospitality of the Emperor and felt I should be too. But he gave me his permission to go with the troops leaving that morning.

 

An hour into the ride I knew I should have waited. Every step of my horse sent a wave of pain through my ass. The noble did not have my length but he was thicker and I had been a virgin. I could still smell the scent from his bath on me. I could still hear his voice as he said 'Mine'. By the time we made camp, I was as stiff as if I had never ridden a horse before.

 

We had camped next to a stream so I wandered away from the rest to find a place to bathe. There were more stains on my clothing and I wondered just how much come he had pumped into me. I sat for a long time in the water, letting it soothe my sore flesh. By the time I sought my bed, I was feeling better, physically at least.

 

Mentally, I would never be the same. I woke in the morning with my cock spurting in my hand as I whispered his name. Each day brought a lessening of the physical memories but an intensification of the mental ones. I dreamed of him every night. My mind replayed every look, every touch, every word we had exchanged.

 

It was a relief to go into battle. At least there I had to focus on something else. For periods of time I could forget him.

 

***

 

He had been gone for six months. I had tried to forget him in other bodies. They didn't satisfy me. After several disappointing episodes, I gave up. He was what I wanted. What I *needed*. I was moving through life as if in a trance. Looking back, it's amazing that I survived. Only my cousin's love for me kept me alive during that time.

 

I finally had news of him. From the very servant who had first brought him to me, that long-ago night.

 

I was on the balcony overlooking the Bay, not seeing the view, lost in my memories of him, when I heard a discreet cough behind me.

 

"Master."

 

"What is it?"

 

"Master, I heard news about Sir Walter from one of the men who returned today."

 

I turned and grabbed his arm. "What news? Is he dead? Tell me quickly."

 

"He reports, Lord, that he is injured."

 

"What! Injured! How reliable is this man?"

 

"My Lord, he awaits outside. Do you care to question him yourself?"

 

He was lucky I didn't order him killed for asking such a stupid question. He was back quickly, hurrying the man in front of him.

 

The man looking terrified to be brought into the presence of a member of the royal family. He was surprised when I questioned him in his own language.

 

"Where did you leave Sir Walter?"

 

"With a farmer about a day's ride away. He was too ill to sit a horse. The fever was making him delirious."

 

"What makes you think he was delirious? He may have just been confused. How badly was he injured?"

 

"The injury would not have been so bad but there was no one to treat it properly for him. It became infected. We tried to get him to stop but he kept saying he had to get back here."

 

"Is that all he said?"

 

"Once the fever took hold he kept telling us to 'Tell Alexius I'm sorry, tell him it was the best night of my life, tell him I believe in destiny now'. And talking about the scented water in the pool, then he would start talking to his father. Sir Walter's father has been dead for over ten years now."

 

"You'll take me to him in the morning. You're lucky I need you to guide me or I would kill you where you stand for leaving him. Oh, and just in case you had any ideas about taking off you'll spend the night in the prison. Pray he is still alive and lives because, if he dies, you will rot in that prison."

 

The guards I had summoned earlier took him. I turned to make my plans for going to Walter. As I issued orders to the servants the words I had heard kept repeating over and over 'Tell Alexius I'm sorry, tell him it was the best night of my life, tell him I believe in destiny now'. And I prayed as I had never prayed before.

 

We left at first light. My personal physician coming with me under protest. He couldn't understand why I would want to save a Norman. I pushed us hard that day needing to get to him. Afraid he would die without knowing what I now knew.

 

Without knowing that I loved him.

 

Our arrival at the farm caused quite a frenzy. The peasants had never had royalty visit them. Never expected royalty to demand to see a Norman. We were shown to the small hut he was housed in. My first response was rage, turning on the man who had left him there, I backhanded him.

 

"Did you not instruct them to care for him? Get him out of that filth. Help them clean him. Physician, as soon as he is clean, you will examine him and tell me what needs to be done. He *will* live or you will follow him into death."

 

I watched as they carefully brought him out of that pig-sty and placed him on the bedding my men quickly spread. The peasant woman timidly offered warm water to bathe him. I wanted to order her death, but restrained myself. It was not her fault that she had not treated my Norman better. My cousin, fearing rebellion of any kind, had allowed all sorts of horrible rumours to abound about these warriors going through our land to the Holy City.

 

As my personal tent was hurriedly set up, I watched them wash his too thin body.

 

"Milord, I must take the arm if we are to have any hope of saving him."

 

"Yes. I see that. Do it quickly. Guards, hold Sir Walter for the physician."

 

He seemed to be out of it but I was taking no chances. The pain would be great and would rouse him enough to struggle. Not that he would have the strength to struggle very hard. My heart screamed as he screamed with the pain. He passed out when the wound was sealed with the hot blade of a knife.

 

I had him moved to the tent, telling the servants to watch over him until my physician and I joined them.

 

I then signaled to the guards. "Hold that man." I said pointing to the man who had left him there.

 

I turned to my physician. "Take his arm at the same place as Sir Walter."

 

He looked at me with disbelief until he saw the cold rage in my face. "You will do it or I will and then he will bleed to death. You can give him his life."

 

I watched as the man was held down while his healthy arm was removed. His screams and pleas falling on deaf ears. Then I ordered him to be kept in the filthy hut he had left Walter in. He was to be given what he needed to stay alive, nothing more. Then I forgot him as I entered my tent.

 

Walter was still unconscious. I sent servants to make sure there was plenty of water to bathe Walter's fevered body. I gave instructions for soup to be made so I could try and feed him broth if he woke. Had the physician prepare a strong drug for the pain I knew he would feel.

 

When the water and drug were prepared, I sent them all out, telling them to stay near by in case I should need them. I settled next to Walter, pulling his head into my lap, cooling his face with a wet cloth.

 

"Walter, I don't know if you can hear me but I am here. I will watch over you. You must live. I will have it no other way. You will *not* leave me."

 

I would call the servants to bring more water when I ran out. I bathed his body when the fever seemed to rise. Sat talking softly to him between times. Near dawn I was no longer telling him to live I was begging.

 

It was the longest night of my life. The sunrise brought me hope as he seemed to have passed into a more normal sleep. I allowed the physician to convince me to get some sleep. He said he would tend Walter, for me to rest.

 

I made myself a bed to one side of the tent and dropped into sleep. I was awakened by Walter's screams. I ran to his side to see that while his eyes were still bright with fever he was aware.

 

"Why didn't you let me die? What good is a soldier with only one arm?"

 

Without turning from him, I issued a command.

 

"Leave us."

 

I waited until we were alone.

 

"You could not be a soldier forever, Walter. I would rather have you here like this, then dead."

 

"You had no right……"

 

"I had every right."

 

"How do you figure that?"

 

"I got your message."

 

"Message? What are you talking about?"

 

"'Tell Alexius I'm sorry, tell him it was the best night of my life, tell him I believe in destiny now.' That *was* what you told your men wasn't it?"

 

"Yes." His face telling me that he didn't see any connection.

 

"That gives me the right. If I am your destiny, then I was brought here in time to make the decision to keep you alive. You are no good to me dead."

 

"What good is a one armed man to anyone?"

 

"So, you're going to give up? Run away from me again? You couldn't face what I made you feel, so you tucked your tail between your legs and ran. And now you are trying to do it again. You fought beside your men in battle when you could have stayed behind them and been safe. Where is that famous courage now?"

 

He wouldn't look at me and I wanted to hit him I was so frustrated. What could I do to make him understand? He needed to want to get well.

 

***

 

I refused to look at him. He was talking like a woman. He's a man. He should understand that I would rather have died. Why would he want to keep me alive? Could one night have mattered to him? Did he feel any of the things I had been feeling? Why would he want a cripple?

 

I tried to turn away from him, the movement causing pain to lance through me. He turned to pick up a cup, then lifted me enough to drink. I recognized the smell and knew it was a strong drug, but also knew it would help the pain. He walked to the opening of the tent and spoke to someone outside. Coming back, he sat next to me and bathed my face and body with a cool cloth. It felt so soothing on my hot skin.

 

A servant came into the tent just as he finished, bringing a bowl of steaming broth. Following some words between them, Alexius lifted me while the servant pushed pillows behind my back for support. More words with the servant who quickly left.

 

Alexius settled next to me again and started spooning the broth into me. I tried to fight him even then but he just pushed the spoon against my lips and it was open or have it run down onto my body. He didn't stop until the bowl was empty.

 

The drug was pulling me down into sleep. I later thought it must have been a dream that I felt his lips brush over mine, followed by words of love.

 

***

 

When I was certain he was sleeping, I left the tent to get some food, setting one of the servants to watch over him with instructions to send for me should his condition change.

 

I knew I had a battle in front of me. He was a warrior. That's all he ever expected to be. He had probably spent his life expecting to die gloriously in war. When my stomach was full, I went in search of my physician. I had questions I hoped he could answer.

 

The information I received from my physician gave me hope. He had heard of artificial arms being made for warriors. It was only useful to hold a shield but that alone could help him feel he had not lost his purpose. It would mean him learning a new way to balance and he would need a lighter sword.

 

All these things I could provide him. And the time he spent learning the new skills, I could spend showing him that peace and home could be a satisfying way to spend his life. I would not take him back to Constantinople when he could travel. We would go to my country home. There we would be among my people. That would be safer.

 

As I approached my tent, I heard the servant's voice shouting for help. I arrived to find Walter delirious with the fever again, trying to strangle the servant I had left to watch him. I pulled him off the servant.

 

"Walter, it's Alexius. You're safe. Lie back."

 

I ordered the servant to bring fresh water as I pushed Walter back and used my own body to hold him down until his exhausted body went limp. The cool water was brought. I could see the bruises on the servant's throat. I told him to send one of the other servants to attend me and gave him leave to rest.

 

Turning back to Walter, I soaked a clean cloth in the water and began to bathe his body again. The next hours were some of the longest of my life. His fever soared and my heart tightened. He rambled, talking to his father, talking to his cousin Robert.

 

He finally settled, the fever lessening for several hours and I dozed next to him. Sometime just before dawn the fever raged again and he began to talk about me and our night together. I listened carefully to his words.

 

"So beautiful…. never knew a man could be so…. pain into exquisite pleasu….. Can't stop dreaming…. the dreams cock in hand… his name…. Got to get back… he felt anything…. said 'mine' … it mean anything….love"

 

I leaned down to kiss his fever-cracked lips softly. Whispering my love to him and praying to the gods again for his recovery. The ritual of bathing him resumed, fighting the fever, feeling slight relief when he calmed and seemed to sleep again.

 

The next few days passed in a blur. My every waking moment spent at his side. When the fever subsided and didn’t return for most of a day, my physician said he would live. But I wasn’t so sure. He looked at me with dead eyes, turning away every time his arm was tended.

 

By this point we both stunk. The tent needed to be aired out and we needed to bathe. There was a stream near-by so I sent my men to see that it was cleared of people or livestock. I wanted to be the only one aside from my physician to see how his body had changed. When I held out the robe, he looked at me with no sign of comprehension.

 

"We stink, Walter. We need to bathe and the tent needs to be aired and cleaned. When you were ill, I could ignore it but no longer. I know you are not totally well yet but I will have them bring a cart if you feel you cannot walk. It's not far and you will feel better once you are clean and have a clean bed to lie in."

 

"I'm a Norman, Lord. We're supposed to stink."

 

"Walter, you can attempt to walk, or get in a cart, or I can have you carried." The look I gave him must have shown my determination.

 

He began to push up. The effort was obviously hard for him but he jerked away from me when I tried to help.

 

"Since you are so determined that I live, I must learn to do things for myself."

 

He stood still, panting as I wrapped the robe around him and tied it at his waist. Standing, it was even more obvious that he had lost a good portion of his flesh. We walked slowly out of the tent. He halted at the opening, squinting at the sunlight. Even the slight effort of walking outside left him trembling. I summoned a servant, ordering a stool for him to sit on while a cart was brought.

 

He was silent and allowed my help getting into the cart only after he failed to get into it twice. I walked beside him as the horse was led to the stream. He put his remaining hand on my shoulder as he got down from the cart. I led him to the stream and had him sit with just his feet in the water.

 

My guards I ordered to wait at a discreet distance. Close enough to hear should I need them but far enough to give us privacy for a quiet conversation. Once we were alone, I shed my clothes, wading into the water and turning to beckon him. He struggled out of the robe and managed to slip into the water up to his waist.

 

I went farther out, ducking down to cover my body, leaning back to wet my hair. When I came up, I found him farther out so that the water had reached his chest. He was starring at his stump with a look of abject horror. I knew I had to distract him quickly.

 

"Walter, duck your head. Your hair needs to be washed, too."

 

He turned to me and the horror was replaced with anger. I much preferred the anger.

 

"My hair needs washing? Do you think I care about the little hair I have left? Look at this! Look at what you let them do to me! I'm a soldier who can no longer fight. What purpose can there be for my life now? You should have let me die."

 

"I couldn't do that."

 

"Why, by all that is holy, not?"

 

"Because I'm not ready to die and because one night with you wasn't enough."

 

He looked at me for a long moment. I moved toward him, keeping my eyes locked with his. I had almost reached him when he ducked down, submerging his body. He refused to meet my eyes. He did however submit to me bathing him. He sat wrapped in the robe watching me as I bathed myself. I made sure he had a good view, willing to do anything to make him see that his life didn't have to be over.

 

I didn't call the guards until he was seated in the cart. The tent had been aired and fresh bedding brought. A bowl of broth ready for him. The face he made when I sat next to him with it told me he was sick of broth.

 

"Can't I have some fruit or at least soup with some meat in it?"

 

"If you feel up to that, of course."

 

I summoned a servant and ordered fruit and something more substantial. He lay back against the pillows and allowed me to feed him. He had been living on just broth for so long that it didn't take much to fill him. He slipped farther down and was soon sleeping. I sat staring at him for a long time, knowing that he still didn't truly want to live but that he at least knew some of what I felt.

 

My body told me I needed rest, so I undressed and lay down next to him on the side away from the lost arm. Sometime during the night I woke to find him clutching at me as silent tears wet both our bodies. I pulled him into my arms and held him as the grief took solid form.

 

I'm not sure when we realized that we were both hard. I wrapped my hand around us, working us. His weak moans telling me he felt pleasure in the touch. Something happened to me then as I brought us to completion. I felt a certainty that I would bring him through this. He was mine and what is mine I hold.

 

***

 

I panted softly as my heart slowed. Part of me wanted to hate this man who was insisting I live. I didn't remember much of the last days, only that he had been at my side whenever I was aware. His voice flowing over me, his hands tending my body with care, the cool cloths on my hot skin. I believed his will had kept me alive.

 

Could he possible feel for me as I felt for him? At the stream, he said that one night hadn't been enough. But I had been whole then. What use was a cripple? I would be reduced to living on the charity of family or begging in the streets if I went home. At least here I could be his whore in return for support.

 

His lips sought mine, I allowed him to kiss me, opening for his tongue to slip inside. By the time he let go, my heart was racing again. He pulled away and cleaned us then settled next to me and was soon asleep. It took me a long time to sleep again. My mind trying to work through the fear, fear of loving this man only to lose him. I had no doubt that once the novelty wore off, he would tire of me and I'd be thrown out.

 

We stayed there for another week. He made me go to the stream with him daily for bathing. He encouraged me to eat, each day my appetite growing. At night he held me. Whenever my body became aroused by his presence, he would stroke us to completion. Not once did he enter me. Each morning I woke in his arms and for the first few minutes felt content until I tried to reach for him with an arm that was no longer there.

 

The wagons were ready. I had been settled under a tree while he directed the preparations. I watched as he moved with grace among his men. His traveling clothing allowing me to appreciate the beauty of his long frame. He came for me when all was ready and helped me settle in one of the wagons. I still tired easily so I was soon dozing in the warmth of the day. Whenever I opened my eyes, he was there beside me asking if I needed anything.

 

Around mid-day, I realised we were not headed back to the city.

 

"Lord, where are we going? This isn't the way back to Constantinople."

 

"No, Walter, it isn't. We are going to my country home. It will be more pleasant for your recovery."

 

"Your country home, Lord? I thought you lived at the palace."

 

"I have rooms there for when I'm in the city but we are going to my home. The place where I was born. I think you will like it there. Didn't realise that your destiny was a rich man, did you?"

 

His smile was beautiful in the bright afternoon and my body responded. I watched as he guided his horse over to a tree near the road. His graceful body angling upwards, he picked a large round fruit from the tree. Turning he spoke to the servants, they hurried to gather more of the fruit and place it in the wagon next to me. I picked up the strange fruit and examined it. He rode back to me smiling at the puzzled expression on my face.

 

"It's an orange, Walter. Here, this is how you eat it."

 

I watched as he peeled the one he was holding, separated it into sections and held a small portion out to me.

 

"Try it, Walter. They're really good, tart and refreshing."

 

I bit into the segment of fruit he handed me, my mouth being flooded with the juice. As he said, it was tart. I swallowed and smiled at him. He leaned down to me to speak softly.

 

"If I had know an orange would get me a smile, I would have sent my men to find some days ago."

 

He held out the rest of the fruit and I took it, setting it on my lap and eating slowly as we continued on our journey. When we made camp that night, he had chicken prepared for me with a glaze flavoured with the juice from the fruit. I ate more than I had since before I had been injured.

 

That night he held me close, careful of the healing stump, raining soft kisses on me. Just before I dropped off, I heard him whisper. "You are mine and what is mine I hold. You will never leave me again."

 

I didn't know then just how accurate his words were.

 

It took us two more days to reach his home. The workers in the fields greeted us as we neared the house. I was amazed at the warmth I saw in the serfs' eyes as they came over to him. The women held back but the men addressed him openly but with obvious respect.

 

One man reached to take a new babe from a woman's arms and held it up for the Lord to see. He spoke to the woman as he touched the babe softly. She blushed and murmured something in return.

 

He then turned and pointed to me, speaking again to them. Each turned to look at me as if memorizing my face. I was given brief nods by the men and shy smiles from the women. I gave them a smile in return. Wondering what he had said to them about me. They turned to move back to their work and we continued to the house.

 

His home turned out to be smaller than the palace but just as opulent. The gardens were well tended and blossoms of every colour flourished there. Later he would tell me that the marble used throughout my new home was quarried on his land as well.

 

He got down and I heard a yell and a young woman ran from the house. She laughed as she jumped, he caught her with ease and swung her around, laughing then kissing both cheeks before sitting her on her feet. I gritted my teeth to keep back the territorial growl that tried to escape. After all, I had no rights, I was just the cripple he'd brought home.

 

He led her to the wagon, letting go of her hand as he reached for me.

 

"Sir Walter, I'd like you to meet my sister. Calliope, this is Sir Walter of Normandy, the man I have chosen as my consort."

 

I had been looking at her, cataloguing the resemblances to the Lord, not really listening to his introduction of me until the word consort came from his mouth. We both turned to look at him then. I was expecting him to say it was a jest but he was watching us both, waiting. She looked at him a long moment then turned toward me.

 

"Welcome, Sir Walter. I hope you will enjoy your new home with us."

 

***

 

I watched the two most important people in my world as I made my announcement of Walter's new position. My sister, of course, knew of my preferences but had always assumed I would at least marry to father an heir. Walter, I knew was still thinking this was some sort of charity.

 

Watching him hover so close to death had made me realize that only he was important. My sister would need to provide an heir for our family. Oh, I suppose I could still father a child. There were women at the court of my cousin who would take my name gladly, give me a child then find lovers.

 

There was a major problem with that...bedding someone else would be impossible for me now.

 

I had received more satisfaction from bringing us to climax with my hands than I had ever experienced with other men. The sounds he made for me, the light in his eyes, knowing he had never let another man touch him in that most intimate of ways, all those things made what happened between us the ultimate ecstasy for me.

 

I saw the resistance in my sister's eyes then the capitulation. I knew there would be trouble at some future time. I just hoped it wouldn't come until he was more secure in his place with me. In his eyes I saw first disbelief then hope followed by fear.

 

The next few weeks passed much as the ones at the farm, with me staying near him, encouraging him to eat and regain his strength. I had all the dishes prepared that I thought might tempt his still poor appetite. At night I held him close, whispering my love to him as he fell asleep.

 

When I felt he was strong enough, I gave instructions to my strongest servant and left him for a few days to see to the harvest. When I returned, I brought the best metal worker available to work with my physician on an artificial arm for him.

 

I returned to find that my sister had made her feelings known to him.

 

I rode onto the land nearest the house only to have one of the workers run to stop me with a message.

 

"Lord, Sir Walter has gone. He managed to get out without the servant you left to care for him knowing."

 

"And where is the servant?"

 

"Gone to find Sir Walter. He had hoped to bring him back before you returned."

 

I told him to see that supplies were made ready. I would need a fresh mount and other men to ride with me so I hurried to my home to leave instructions. When I rode up and my sister did not come running to meet me, I knew she was responsible.

 

I went straight to my bathing chamber, wanting to rid myself of the grime of the road before taking to it again. Looking to one of the servants, I gave instructions to find my sister and bring her to me. I had just sunk down into the warm water when I heard the footsteps of the servant returning.

 

"Lord, your sister says she is too ill to attend you now. She says she hopes you are well and had a good journey."

 

"Go back and tell my sister that she will attend me now before my anger grows stronger. She will not like the consequences of making that happen."

 

I was almost ready to get out of the water when I heard her footsteps. She moved slowly into the room her head lowered.

 

"Tell me what happened between you and my consort. Tell me why he has fled from here."

 

"I don't know what you mean. He is a grown man. He is not your slave. He was free to leave if he wished. Why do you care? He is just a crippled Norman. You can find prettier, younger boys to fill your bed. And now that he is gone, you can marry and produce an heir."

 

"You forget who is master here! I have chosen him as my consort. This is not something that is going away. You will produce an heir for our line. I will never marry. He is the only one who will share my bed. Did you say to him the things you just said to me? Is that why he has gone?"

 

"I told him you needed to produce an heir and he would be in the way when you came back with a wife."

 

I had never felt such rage at my sister before. I had indulged her in all things since our father had died. Obviously I had let her have too much freedom. She now believed she could run my life. I surged up out of the water bearing down on her my hand raised to strike. Her eyes widened with fear but she made no move to flee.

 

My movement stopped as I saw him standing in the doorway behind her, the servant I had instructed to watch over him holding tightly to his remaining arm. She turned to see what I was focused on and frowned.

 

"Calliope, go to your chambers and stay there until I send for you. We still have things to discuss. You go with her and make sure she stays there. I will talk with you later."

 

The servant released Walter and fell in behind my sister as she stalked from the room. I walked over to where he stood, head lowered and touched him gently.

 

"Seems like we have been here before. How much did you hear?"

 

"Only what I had already heard. That you need to marry and I'm in the way."

 

"Undress and join me, we'll get the dust of the road off you while we talk."

 

One of the servants moved forward to help him but he pushed him away. He undressed slowly then came and slipped into the water as far from me as he could manage. I moved closer to him and reached to bathe him. He remained stiff as I moved my hands over him, cupping water to flow over his chest.

 

"Do the women in your land tell men what to do?"

 

"No, of course not. Women know that decisions are made by men."

 

"Do you think the women here make decisions for the men?"

 

"What do you mean?"

 

"I mean why would you believe that my sister makes my decisions? Have I given you any indication that she makes them for me?"

 

"No."

 

"Then why did you listen to her nonsense? Is that not why you left?"

 

He gave me that stubborn look I had learned to dislike. I silently asked the gods why they had made me fall in love with such a stubborn man.

 

***

 

The servant had found me. I told myself that I returned with him to save his life. But I knew that was a lie. I returned because I was in love and I needed to be with Alexius as long as possible. His sister's words had cut deep, deeper still because they rang true.

 

"You should marry and produce an heir. It would please your cousin. No woman would tolerate me in your bed. Not even when she has your name. Maybe especially when she has your name. Let me leave now before..."

 

"Before what, Walter? Before you love me? Before I love you? We both know it's too late. We have loved each other since the first night we were together."

 

His fingers brushed over a nipple bringing it erect. His mouth covered the other one and my back arched to press closer to him. His other hand finding me under the water and bringing me instantly erect.

 

I'm not sure how we made it back to the bed. My body his, to use as he wished. He settled between my legs, our hardness pressing and rubbing together as he kissed and sucked at my neck. I held tightly to him with my one remaining hand. When he pulled away, I moaned.

 

"Need to get you ready, Walter. It's been so long it will be as though you are virgin again."

 

I surged up to him when he pressed into me, forcing a fast deep penetration. His hiss of surprise was oddly pleasing to me. He began to pump into me and I revelled in being used by him again after such a long time. The pleasure was far beyond my memory. My climax when it came caused me to scream his name. His smile signalled his pleasure in my actions.

 

I fell asleep in his arms and woke to find him still holding me tightly. When he went to talk to his sister, he left me with two servants and guards at the door. Not that I blamed him. I would have done the same.

 

***

 

I waited until after breakfast the next morning to go to speak with my sister. I left Walter with an extra servant and guards at the door. My orders simple: he was not to leave.

 

My sister was in her private garden, lingering over her own breakfast. She looked up at me with trepidation as I took a seat next to her.

 

"Calliope, I have given you much leeway in the years since our father died. I feel I have done you an injustice in this. I fear your husband will not indulge you as I have. Most probably he will beat you if you ever interfere with him as you have with me."

 

"Alexius, you should send this man away. You must father an heir. Our cousin the emperor....."

 

"Enough! Understand this, my sister, I *love* this man. You will accept this or you will cease to be my sister."

 

I wanted to reach out and wipe the pain from her face but knew she would see that as a reason to continue this campaign. I wanted no more attempts made by her to drive him away.

 

"Do you hear me, Calliope? No more words to him about leaving."

 

"Yes, Alexius. I understand."

 

"Good."

 

I kissed her gently and left her to go find the metal smith.

 

Walter stared at us in disbelief when I told him what we had planned.

 

***

 

I was in love with a madman. A metal arm? Did he really think it would be of anyuse? I tried to hide my true feelings as the physician and the metal smith examined and measured. Their words unknown to me but the gestures letting me know at least part of the plans.

 

Alexius watched and made an occasional comment to them. Then switching to my language gave me an explanation.

 

"Walter, the arms my physician had heard of are made to hold a shield and help the wearer to balance on a horse. It can never replace what you have lost but will give you back a measure of the abilities you have honed on the battlefields over the years. I am having a new blade made for you as well and once that is completed we will work together for you to learn to use both."

 

"Alexius, you do not really believe this will work do you?"

 

I saw the shock on the face of the other two at my addressing him by name. He merely smiled as he answered me. I had decided that since he was insisting we were lovers and not just whore and master, I was entitled to use his name in the informal setting of his home.

 

"My physician has heard of such being used. It is worth the expense to me. I will enjoy having someone here to practice my own skills with. My guards are too fearful of injuring me to give me a decent workout. I trust you will do that for me?"

 

When the arm was made, the physician insisted that I only wear it for a short period each day. I had to admit that he was right to suggest that. During my recovery I had learned to balance in an entirely different way than before.

 

I pushed myself too far the first day, determined to learn to walk properly with the cumbersome thing. I wore it much longer than the physician wished. It was Alexius himself who rubbed the ointment into my sore shoulder and chest that night. And, for the first time, I slept wrapped around him instead of him wrapped around me.

 

Over the next months I learned to wear the arm with little pain, the skin of my body becoming callused where the straps rested. We started with a very lightweight shield the metal smith had made especially for me. As the weeks and months went on, the shields became heavier until they were of a practical weight that could actually be of protection against a sword.

 

Alexius had been practicing with me as I learned to use the lighter weight sword that had been made for me. The day I managed to actually touch the point of the sword to his chest was the day I felt like a man again.

 

That night I initiated our lovemaking for the first time. His joy in my actions took my breath away. His tears when I spoke of my love for the first time the greatest gift I had ever received.

 

***

 

My lover had learned the new skills well. A lesser man would never have been able to carry both the weight of the arm and a shield heavy enough to protect. The day he got close enough to actually place the point of his sword at my heart I knew he would now have faith in himself again.

 

That night, when he pulled me close in the bath to kiss me, my heart soared. When he spoke words of love for the first time, I couldn't stop the tears of happiness that came from my eyes. We made love again in the morning, something we had never done before.

 

The next day the messenger arrived with news that my cousin had obtained a husband for my sister and we were to come to the city right away. My sister was not pleased with the news. She had hoped for a longer time to stay in her home. But neither of us would defy the emperor in this.

 

Walter had not wanted to go with us to the city but I insisted that I wanted him with me. Now that he had declared his love for me, I couldn't bear the idea of being away from him for so long.

 

As it turned out it was a good thing he was with us.

 

We were attracted on the second day of our journey. The rabble was a band of foreigners looking for wealth to take home with them. Walter and I fought side by side and when I was knocked unconscious he stood over my body, fighting off attackers, until my advance guard returned to rout the thieves. Stopping the plan the horde had made to rush him.

 

Calliope told me later that she had feared for my life. She was expecting to be raped by the attackers. In all the months that had passed since I had brought Walter home with me, she had tolerated him at best. It was quite a surprise to find them both hovering over me when I came to.

 

"You saved us both, Walter. Without you here he would be dead and I would, at best be raped. I have been wrong to want you gone. I see that now. Do you think you can forgive me?"

 

"If you forgive me for thinking of you as a spoiled child. It has not been easy for me to accept what we have. In my country we would be put to death. Burnt alive after torture with fire. I felt that he would cast me aside as soon as he tired of me. So your words were painful to hear. I still worry that he may tire of me. Maybe today I showed him I have value outside his bed."

 

My heart ached at his words but I made no mention of them to him then. I waited for a time when I could be alone with him. I waited until I decided on the one thing I thought would make him believe.

 

I turned my head to look at them and moaned with the pain. Reaching up carefully to make sure my head was not lying in two pieces on the blanket I felt under me with my other hand.

 

"Alexius, lie still. You have a gash on your head and I don't want it to start bleeding again."

 

His hand was warm on my shoulder, my sister's hand resting on the other one.

 

"Are you both unharmed?"

 

"Yes, my brother. Your Walter kept us both safe. He was a demon standing over you, his sword bringing death to all who approached too closely to us. He saved your sister from the shame and pain of being raped. Now I need only cope with the shame of not seeing him for the good man he is."

 

"Did you believe your brother would choose a lesser man as his consort?"

 

Her answer was lost to me as I sank back into the darkness. I floated in and out of awareness for the next few days. I would wake to the motion of a wagon, my sister's voice speaking softly to me, hearing his voice as he issued commands through my chief guard. When I asked later, the guard told me he obeyed out of fear of the demon he had seen in battle turning to devour him. And since all the commands made sense and looked out for my well being, he did not think I would be angry.

 

By the time we reached the city I was awake more than I slept and my eyes able to track movement without pain or blurriness. My cousin knew we had been attacked because Walter had sent a messenger ahead with the news. He was waiting for me in my chambers when we arrived.

 

After his interrogation of my chief guard, my sister and several of my other men, my cousin conceded, --privately of course, that I had picked a good man to stand at my side.

 

***

 

Calliope's wedding was a spectacle beyond any I had ever seen. I was pleased that she insisted I be seated with them during the feasting afterward. When her groom looked at me askance, she explained to him that I had kept her pure for him. Spinning a yarn of my exploits that made me appear to be almost a god. 

 

She had told us both she feared the alliance her cousin had made through this man. She was relieved when she met not some troll of a man but a decent looking man. It was true he was older than her by at least a decade but he acted with courtesy toward her. His eyes showing his pleasure in her beauty.

 

As they rose to retire for the evening, he came to me as Calliope was kissing her brother goodnight.

 

"She tells fantastic stories. I think I shall find my life with her most entertaining. I thank you for keeping her safe and pledge I will do the same."

 

"That is good to hear. She is fiercely loyal, a good thing to have in a wife."

 

"A good thing indeed. Goodnight."

 

Calliope stopped by me kissing my cheek and whispering goodnight before turning to place her hand in her new husband's. I felt Alexius's hand on my arm.

 

"Come, Walter. We can use my recent brush with death as an excuse to retire early."

 

The light in his eyes told me that 'retiring' would not actually be what happened when we reached his chambers.

 

When we reached his rooms, he sent the servants away, telling them he would call if he needed them. Once we were alone, he pulled me close, kissing me as if we had never kissed before and never would again. Somehow he managed to get me mostly undressed before ending the kiss.

 

"You are mine, Walter. Do you understand? You belong with me."

 

"Alexius, what are you saying?"

 

"I heard you when I was injured. I heard you tell Calliope you think I will *tire* of you. I've thought about that a lot, trying to decide how to show you that will never happen."

 

"I don't know if anything can really make me feel secure. I mean you must want me, now at least. The gods know I would have died if not for your determination to keep me alive. Then when you had an arm made for me and spent so many patient hours helping me learn to use it. I began to feel like a man again. Not whole but not a cripple either."

 

"You have never been a cripple in my eyes, Walter. And your actions on the journey that day proved you are not. Tonight I'm going to give you what I have given no one else. What I will never give to another."

 

He stepped back from me and began to drop his garments. When he was naked, he came to me quickly stripping off my remaining clothing. His hand trailed over the rough skin where the straps rubbed against me.

 

Taking my hand he led me to the bed and pushed me down to lie on my back. My legs began lifting of their own accord, opening my body to him. He smiled down and shook his head slowly while pushing my legs back to lie flat and side-by-side.

 

I watched startled as he began to slick my shaft with the musk-scented oil we normally used to facilitate our lovemaking. I sucked in a deep breath as he straddled me and began to take me into his body. I stared, amazed, as he grimaced when my cock breached the ring of muscles. Waited to see if he would pull away and enter me instead.

 

He sat very still for a while, taking deep breaths and rotating his hips. I grasped the bedding tightly as I struggled not to obey my body's desires to thrust up into him. I knew my size could hurt him if I was not careful.

 

I gripped his leg as he pushed down further taking all of me into his tight, hot body. I smiled at him as he began to move on me. The feeling beyond any I had ever felt with a woman. Finally understanding his pleasure when he did this to me.

 

His movement were frantic and I fought with my body to hang on. I didn't want to come until he was ready. When he pulled off me, I moaned with the loss. I watched surprised as he positioned himself on his knees, his ass high and his shoulders resting on the bed.

 

"Take me, Walter. Take me as I take you. Give me the pleasure of being possessed by you."

 

The words panted by a man who had given me the greatest love I had known. 

 

I moved to my knees behind him, mesmerized by his small hole pulsing as he waited for me to enter him. I positioned myself, sliding into his relaxed body easily.

 

Moving slowly and carefully, I began to make love to him. But lovemaking was not what he wanted right then. He wanted a claiming. For a brief moment, I wondered if his sister was assisting in her deflowering as enthusiastically as he was in his. Then all thoughts were lost in the heat of having him give this to me.

 

I pumped into his body. His reaction, a growled "*Yes*!" He rocked back to meet me and was soon chanting "*Harder*!" So I wrapped my hand around a hip bone and pounded into him in the way I had always wanted to fuck the whores I had used but never had.

 

When he screamed my name, I felt the shudders of his release, then his muscles locking down on me so tightly it was painful but at the same time glorious. I pulsed, empting my come deep inside him. He dropped to the bed and I followed him down, too tired to do anything else.

 

I'm not sure how long I lay there before it occurred to me that I was crushing him. He moaned weakly as I rolled off his body.

 

"You should have told me."

 

"Told you what, Alexius?"

 

"How wonderful it feels."

 

I rolled to my side to kiss him gently.

 

"Feels damn good from either side to me. Thank you for giving yourself to me."

 

His eyes looked at me seriously.

 

"No more doubts?"

 

"Not ever again."

 

 

Epilogue

 

 

"You were a very dashing knight, Walter."

 

"And you were a very seductive noble, Alexius. But you did spoil Kim. She made pretty babies though."

 

"Beautiful babies. Karma took a while to get back to me, huh?"

 

"Look at it this way, you are even again. And you got me again so you are still blessed or cursed depending on your outlook."

 

"Having a lover with a sweet, tight ass and a fucking huge cock? I think I've been blessed. Now come on take me to bed and show me how well you ride."

 

End.


	3. III: Space the 24th Century

"Alex, you will awaken on the count of three. One. Two. Three. Welcome back."

 

"Where did I go this time?"

 

"It was the late twentieth century, early twenty first. This one was amazing. He believed you. He even had himself regressed."

 

"Really? How did I describe him?"

 

"Why don't you just watch the vid?"

 

"I will, but I want your impressions, too."

 

"You said he was older, balding, but built, well endowed. Your name was Alex in that lifetime, too. You know, you are the only person I've regressed who has been male in all their lives. I know there has to be a female you back there somewhere."

 

"Why? He's been male in all of them. Some of them would have been easier if one of us had been a woman. One of the perks of space travel and meeting aliens has certainly been that homosexuality is no longer taboo. When we find each other this time, we won't need to hide. We can even have a marriage contract."

 

"We were all on the same planet then. Have you thought about what you will do if you don't find him? Or what you will do if he's an alien?"

 

"I'll find him, Dr. Scully. We always find each other. And if he is an alien, maybe he'll be one with interesting mating rituals. Hey, maybe he's a Potwandan. I could get into that rough stuff."

 

The doctor laughed at his patient's naive eagerness. The boy, and he was still a boy even if he was man sized, still had much to learn.

 

"Go watch the vid. You were very much into the 'rough stuff' with him back then. Just keep in mind Potwandan mating rituals would more than likely put a human in sick bay. So, for your sake, I hope he is human."

 

+++++++++++++

 

Alex took the vid, stopped on the way home for the right mood enhancer, pleased that he had a long weekend to look forward to. He had come to Earth to study when he was fifteen and now, at the ripe old age of twenty, he was through training at the academy. His plan was to travel on a spaceship to as many worlds as possible. Those plans had only been reinforced by the regressions.

 

He had started the regression therapy because he kept having dreams about a man. The dreams were so erotic and vivid that he was having trouble concentrating. His doctor had suggested he visit a psychiatrist when the usual methods of treatment had failed.

 

Dr. Scully had tried sleep therapy but Alex had not been helped and the dreams became more intense. One night at the clinic, he ejaculated six times during the eight-hour cycle. A solution needed to be found since the boy could not continue that pattern.

 

Dr. Scully was not sure himself why he suggested regression. Maybe it was that the dreams were not present day images for the boy, but rather dreams of the past. He had discussed the case with his wife and co-worker; Dana, who thought it was just a fertile imagination.

 

Since the regressions had begun, the boy had told him many tales of this lover he always found. A man who never wanted a man until Alex came into his life. A lover who in most lifetimes had appeared to be stronger, more dominant but who had in every lifetime been the bottom in the relationship. Dana seemed quite pleased at the physical reactions of her husband after a session with the boy.

 

++++++++++

 

The vid was set up, the mood enhancer swallowed, the incense filled the room with the scent of musk. He had showered and was now reclining naked on his sofa, ready to watch. The vid started and he was presented with his own face, but not quite his own.

 

His past selves always made him look different. The expressions and speech patterns so strange sometimes. This one was very easy to understand. He watched for a while but closed his eyes and took his cock in hand as he began to describe a sexual encounter with his Walter. Walter, a good name, an old name. Would he be Walter again as he was Alex again?

 

++++++++++

 

I woke to see Walter standing in front of the 'woman kind of thing' mirror I had brought home the day before. He was turning this way and that, looking at his reflection. I smiled as his fingers traced the patterns I had made with the crop on his ass the night before.

 

My smile was not for the fingers moving over the lines of bruises, but for the cock that was starting to rise. He was unaware he had an audience and I wished to keep him that way a while longer. I watched as his mouth quirked in a Mona Lisa smile. Then the fingers pressed down on the darkest bruise. The hiss of breath telling me it was sore. The cock swelling more telling me he liked it being that way.

 

"Walter."

 

His head jerked up and he snatched his hand away from his ass, looking like a little boy caught being naughty by his mother.

 

"Morning, Alex."

 

"Waking up to see you like that makes it a beautiful morning."

 

I threw back the covers to let him see my own arousal. His smile lighting up my heart. He came toward the bed without a word. Kneeling beside it, he bent and wrapped his mouth around my cockhead, his tongue pushing into the slit to get the first taste of me.

 

I let him play for a few minutes before pulling him up by his ear.

 

"Get lubed, slave. I want to use that ass."

 

"Yes, Master."

 

He rose, picked up the lube from the bedside table and squeezed a good-sized dollop on his fingers.

 

"Show me."

 

He grinned and turned, bending slightly at the waist so I could watch his fingers as they worked his tight hole open for me to use. When he pushed the third one inside, I moved off the bed.

 

"On the edge, knees wide, shoulders down."

 

He obeyed me instantly. I ran my hands lovingly over his ass, pressing into the bruises and enjoying his moans. His hips pushed back toward me. I slapped his right cheek lightly and he stilled.

 

Stepping closer, I rubbed my cock along the crease, smiling as he moaned once more. Pushing against him until the tip was inside him, I let go, grabbed his hip and rammed forward, burying my entire length in him with one thrust.

 

He hissed and his hips pushed back again. I was hot and needy and gave him no time to adjust. My cock pumped into him hard and deep. Taking my pleasure from his body and he pushed back, welcoming me inside.

 

I screamed his name as I shot deep in his body. Groaned as his muscles milked me. I pulled out slowly and sank down on the bed next to him. When my heart had calmed, my breathing normal, I ordered him to stand.

 

"Good, slave. You didn't come. Turn around."

 

He turned with his back to me and I slipped my fingers inside him. I knew just how to finger fuck him to keep him on the edge for a long time.

 

"I think later I'm going to strap you to the table and fist this ass. Would you like that, slave? Your master's fist inside you, possessing you as no one else ever has."

 

"I am yours, Master. Yours to use as you wish. I would be pleased to receive my Master's fist as I receive his cock or his tongue or his toys."

 

"A proper answer, slave."

 

I pulled my fingers out, pleased with his moan of loss. I tapped his hip to indicate he should turn. He turned, presenting me with a close up of his beautiful cock. I leaned forward and ran my tongue over the head.

 

"Spread your legs for me."

 

He shifted so I had room to reach between his legs. I let my knuckles rub along his perineum before turning my hand over to insert my fingers inside him again. I bent to cover the head of his cock. Slowly fucking his ass with my fingers as I fucked his slit with my tongue.

 

His hands fastened on my shoulders, anchoring him to me. His body was starting to tremble with the effort of holding back his climax. I sucked hard, my tongue as far in his slit as I could push it, as I crooked my fingers inside him, rubbing his prostate hard.

 

All control gone, he screamed my name as he shot into my mouth. His ass pulsing around my fingers, his fingers digging into my shoulders as the scream tapered off.

 

+++++++++++

 

The current Alex whimpered as his own cock twitched and come shot high to fall back down on his panting body. He lay for a long time barely hearing his voice as he talked about the life lived four centuries earlier with a deeply loved man.

 

++++++++++++

 

Alex boarded the ship that would be his home for the next three years. He had promised Dr. Scully that he would continue the regressions with the ships psychiatrist. He had been told that the Captain expected each new crewmember to report to him. He was not surprised since he had heard that the Captain was a very hands on type of person. A man who knew his people's names and faces.

 

He tapped at the door heard, a loud 'Come in' bellowed from within and opened the door to meet his Captain. The man had his back to the door, bent over, digging through a drawer.

 

"Ensign Alex Skinner reporting as ordered, Sir."

 

The Captain rose and turned. Alex's mouth went dry.

 

Mankind had colonized the planet where Alex was born over two hundred years before his birth. As with most colonizations, the environment had made sometimes subtle -- sometimes not so subtle -- changes to the inhabitants. Alex and his Captain were about to become very aware of those changes.

 

The Captain saw before him the most beautiful boy he had ever seen. The green eyes sparkled, the pink lips begging to be kissed, the nose with cute little lines above the bridge. Due to the heavier gravity of Alex's home world his people were not very tall so he was considered tall at five ten.

 

But the Captain towered over him. The Captain was an Alpha male even by his home world's standards. He stood close to seven feet, and as all males of his planet had no body hair. His muscles heavy and dense, a strong man not easily bested in a fight. He also possessed a keen sense of smell, rather like the dogs of earth. That enhanced sense alone would prove to be his undoing.

 

Aside from his mouth going dry, Alex's body had other reactions. He hardened to prepare for insertion. His lungs expanded to store the extra air he would need at the moment of ejaculation. His body temperature rose, causing the mating pheromones to fill the air.

 

This happened in the space of time it took the Captain to do his physical inventory of the boy. The odour from the boy reached him and his face took on first a puzzled expression then a surprised one as his cock grew to its full size in his pants.

 

Even with the intermingling that went on between planets no one had ever thought to test the effects of the male pheromones of Alex's people on the people born on the Captain's planet. So the Captain had not been prepared for the possibility that this new crewmember would soon become his life-mate.

 

He moved without thought to lift Alex into his arms. The kiss long and deep, as the men tasted each other for the first time. Alex, as was decreed by his biology, had never actually had intercourse. The Captain had but only with the women who inhabited certain sections of ports just as in days of sailing ships.

 

When the kiss ended, Alex smiled at his new mate as he caressed the bald head. The Captain's breathing was deep, inhaling more of the scent of Alex into his body. It was intoxicating, exhilarating, a drug he would one day embrace being addicted to.

 

"What is your name?"

 

"Walter."

 

"I knew I would find you again. We're wearing too many clothes, Walter."

 

Walter lowered him to the floor, stepped back and ripped his clothes from his body. Alex undressed with equal haste. At Alex's directions, Walter moved willingly to lie upon his desk, raising his head so he could watch as Alex spread his cheeks and used his tongue to prepare the way.

 

The moans he made quite pleasing to the boy. Walter felt no fear as the slender cock slid inside him. Had he known more about the physical make-up of the boy entering him, he might have been very nervous. Once the boy was fully sheathed inside, his cock expanded to its full size making Walter gasp with the slight burning as his virgin tissues were stretched.

 

"What's happening? It feels like it's getting bigger."

 

"You don't expand once you are inside?"

 

"No, it grows to full size before we penetrate."

 

Alex's hand stroked his new lover's dick slowly, measuring Walter's size with his hands.

 

"I'm glad to hear that. I was afraid you would hurt me when the time comes to complete the circle of our consummation."

 

He began to move then and Walter's head dropped back as a loud groan broke from his lips. Alex moved slowly allowing the body to learn him. When Walter began to lift up to meet each thrust, he sped up. Alex's hands gripped the legs of his man as he moved toward his climax.

 

Walter had wrapped one of his big hands around his cock, pulling and stroking, hard, wanting to come and surprised that his usual method was not working in the way he was used to.

 

Alex whispered Walter's name as he surged inside one last time and his seed filled his lover. He reached and pushed Walter's hand aside and with three quick strokes brought him the release he wanted.

 

The boy lay on the big man's chest listening to the heart pounding wildly inside. They didn't hear the door open but both heard the first officer as he took in the sight in front of him. The boy lying on the Captain's chest, still buried inside him, the Captain's hands moving slowly over the boy's back and through his hair.

 

"Captain, what's going on?"

 

The Captain turned his head seeing the surprise on First Officer John Doggett's face. He straightened, trying to push the boy up, off and out of him. All he succeeded in doing was causing them both pain. The boy's wail loud next to his ear.

 

"Walter, please don't do that. You must wait until the seal releases on its own."

 

"What?"

 

"When the men of my planet ejaculate, the head forms a seal to insure the sperm has time to fertilize the eggs. It's an involuntary response. If you keep pulling, you will make the seal last longer. Not to mention cause us both more pain."

 

"Doggett, get the physician up here immediately."

 

"Aye, Captain."

 

The first officer moved to the communication panel and summoned the doctor to report to the Captain's quarters on the double. While waiting, Captain Krycek tried once more to pull free, causing both of them considerable pain.

 

The thunderclouds on the Captain's face would have scared his new Ensign if Alex had not known what Walter had yet to learn. Alex's people mated for life. What had just happened between them insured that bond. Walter would never be able to perform with another for the rest of his life. And neither would Alex.

 

Dr. Mulder took one look at the situation and shoved First Officer Doggett out the door. Then she put her fist in her mouth to stop the giggles that tried to escape. She took several deep breaths before turning back toward the two men lying across the desk.

 

"Captain, you sent for me?"

 

"Yes, Doctor. Do something. Get us apart."

 

"I'm sorry, Captain. There's nothing I can do. You will just have to wait for the seal to release on its own. I'm sure he told you that."

 

"Of course I told him. He's already hurt me, trying to get us apart."

 

"How long does this last?" Walter's voice sounded embarrassed.

 

"It usually lasts around thirty minutes but since you tried to break the seal it will probably be twice that long. Didn't the two of you discuss this before hand?"

 

She was looking pointedly at Alex as she said this. She knew he was her husband's regression patient and therefore knew where he was from and how his body functioned. She had been on duty the night of his sleep therapy, which had been one of the deciding factors in the regression therapy.

 

"No. Uh... I really didn't talk to him. Uh... the mating pheromones seemed to hit him faster than normal and ah... Well, you know about my regressions. I knew he was the one the minute I saw him so I just sort of let it happen."

 

"You still should have told him. But it's too late now."

 

"Will the two of you quit talking like I'm not here and explain this?"

 

"Captain, the men of Alex's planet emit pheromones when aroused that cause a reaction in their mate. I say mate because the pheromones only work on a compatible person. Once the first intimacy has taken place, the two are joined for life."

 

"What do you mean? Are you saying that he and I... but that can't be. I'm not gay. He's the only man I've ever done anything with. I'm not even sure why or how this happened but it won't happen again."

 

She saw the pain in the boy's eyes at these words and silently cursed her Captain.

 

"Captain, this isn't a choice. His sperm has already started a chemical reaction in your body. From this day forward, you will only be able to perform with him. His home world changed his people. He could no more stop his reaction to you then he could stop breathing. Sooner or later you will have to admit to yourself that you couldn't either."

 

"I still don't understand. If his sperm causes a reaction then why isn't he already mated to someone?"

 

"Captain, he was a virgin. You are the first man his pheromones worked on. You are the first man he has been with. Honestly, has your brain stopped functioning? Shall I get you a pad so you can take notes?"

 

"Doctor, I'll thank you to remember that I am your superior officer." The Captain tried to sound dignified in spite of his position, naked, on his own desk with his new Ensign's cock locked inside him.

 

"Yes, Sir, you are. But I also have authority in all medical situations and a healthy sex life is essential for optimum performance on the job. Therefore it falls under my purview. I've had the opinion for years that you needed the stability of a relationship in your life. I think you will discover a new dimension of experience through this boy."

 

"I did not call you here for an opinion, Doctor. Since you have stated that you cannot separate us, please leave us alone."

 

"Yes, Captain. May I suggest that you engage privacy mode during mating in the future so that the first officer doesn't get a free peep show."

 

The doctor exited the room to find Doggett waiting outside.

 

"So, Doctor, tell me, what's that all about?"

 

"The Ensign is from New Russia."

 

"Oh shit! That's what I thought. The Captain didn't know?"

 

"Guess not, but it's obvious you do."

 

"My cousin did her apprenticeship there. Her husband scored on the first date. They have three kids and she's carrying again."

 

"Maybe you can convince him that it's a one way ticket. He didn't want to listen to me. He said something that really hurt Alex. I hope you didn't need him for anything important because he'll be there awhile."

 

"Good thing we aren't scheduled to leave for two weeks. That ought give him time to accept reality."

 

The two wandered off down the hall with Doggett still grinning as Dana tried to keep a straight face. Secretly she was pleased. She really did think that the Captain needed a real relationship and the boy was indeed beautiful.

 

Once the doctor had left, Walter had immediately called for privacy mode. Alex was lying on his chest, head resting on his heart once more. Walter's hands resting on the desk, not touching the boy who had given him what he would one day admit was the best orgasm of his life to that point.

 

He had not said a word to the boy since the doctor had left. And the boy was silent, pulled inside himself from the rejection in the harshly spoken words of his new mate. Part of him knew that the bond could not be broken but he was still young and just a bit insecure in the newness of all this. But in this life he had not had time to grow the shields he had used in the past. Up until now his life had been fairly uneventful and serene.

 

Walter was surprised when he felt the first tears rolling down his chest to pool in his arm pit.

 

"Are you 'crying'?" His voice made the word crying a condemnation in the boy's ears.

 

"I'm sorry. I just thought that when I found you, you would want me right away as you did in all our other lives. It never occurred to me to wait and give you time."

 

"What are you talking about?"

 

"I've been regressed and we have been lovers for eons. In all our lives, we find each other."

 

"Look, you're very attractive, but I'm not gay."

 

"You never thought you were in the other lives either but you always wanted me."

 

"I don't believe in regression."

 

"You've told me that before. But I know we belong together. And now that the bond is formed, there is no going back."

 

"This is ridiculous. How can your sperm do anything to me? I don't feel any differently."

 

"You won't, except that you will only mate with me from now on. You won't be able to with anyone else and neither will I."

 

"I don't believe that. This was a one shot deal. Get that straight."

 

The boy sighed softly, his pain evident and said no more. As soon as he felt the seal release, he pulled carefully out of the captain. He moved to pick up his clothes where they were thrown on the floor. Dressed hurriedly and almost ran from the cabin.

 

Walter sat naked on his sore ass, on his desk, and wondered why he suddenly felt so alone. That however did not prevent him from attempting to have the Ensign transferred. The doctors stopped that attempt as soon as they heard about it. Separation before completion of the bond would mean neither of the men would be functioning due to an almost constant state of arousal.

 

Walter tried to argue with them but his Commander told him privately that he would not risk losing two people because Walter refused to face reality. 'Walter, you've always been a realist. What's changed that? He's a beautiful boy. Relax and enjoy him. I'll bet he's hot stuff in bed. I'd take him away from you if it were possible.' Walter chalked this speech up to the fact that they had been at the academy together, and being a married man, the Commander wanted the entire world shackled.

 

That had taken a week and he had stayed planet side while the boy was on the ship to avoid the odour of him that now seemed to be everywhere. During the next week, in his usual stubborn way he tried to prove everyone wrong. He prowled through every pleasure house around the port then wandered further afield looking for others.

 

At best, he would walk in the door the odours of the women would reach him and he would run to avoid puking in the entry. He tried a house that advertised both male and female companions, thinking that with fewer women, he might manage to make it past the door but even that failed.

 

So, in desperation, he went to an all male house, thinking he could at least prove that he could function with someone else. He picked a man who looked as different from Alex as he could find and followed him to his room.

 

The tall, blond with red eyes asked what he wanted and he mumbled just a normal BJ would do. The blond smiled and guided him to a chaise. He carefully undressed Walter, pushed him to lie down and swallowed him whole.

 

Nothing happened.

 

Walter felt the warm tongue slide over him. The fingers that probed his ass rubbed insistently over his prostate in a way that normally drove him crazy.

 

And still nothing happened.

 

Finally the man raised his head, gave Walter a sardonic smile and said, "Maybe I'm not what you're looking for."

 

"I didn't believe them."

 

"Believe who?"

 

"The doctors, my First Officer, *Him*."

 

"Him, who?"

 

"Alex. He's from New Russia."

 

"Shit, man. You just wasted your money. No one else can do anything for you now."

 

"But I'm not gay." Walter slapped his hand over his mouth when he realized he sounded like a pouting little boy. The pleasure companion just shook his head.

 

It was late when he got back to the ship. As soon as he stepped on board he smelled *him*. It was that rich, full odour that had filled his office when the boy had impaled Walter. Crewmembers moved quickly out of his way as he charged toward the sleeping quarters.

 

He didn't even notice when he knocked his First Officer into a bulkhead. It was a good thing Doggett had seen him coming like a charging bull down the passageway or he might have been seriously injured.

 

He overrode privacy mode on the Ensign's door and stood in the doorway looking at the beautiful boy lying naked on his bunk. Alex was stroking his cock in a slow sensuous way, his head back exposing his throat, his eyes closed tightly. The pheromones were so heavy Walter thought he could almost *see* them.

 

He wondered briefly why the entire crew wasn't trying to get in the room to ravish the boy. Then all thoughts fled as the boy said his name in a voice deep with need and lust.

 

He stepped inside and, turning, growled at the communications console. "Privacy mode. We are not to be disturbed for anything less than an attack on the ship."

 

"Acknowledged."

 

Alex watched with hope in his green eyes as Walter began to strip. When Walter walked to stand at the foot of the bed, the boy spread his legs. Walter knelt between them and just stared at the man waiting for his next move. He wrapped his big paw around the perfectly formed cock and stroked it slowly.

 

"Is this full size?"

 

"Yes, I was getting close to climax."

 

"So that means you can not enter me now?"

 

"I could but it would not last long. And you would be stuck with me inside again. You may enter me. We could complete the circle."

 

"Complete the circle? What do you mean by that?"

 

"I need your sperm inside me as I put mine in you. It's really only a symbol since the chemical reactions took place last time. But it's also a way of saying we are equal partners. That neither of us rules the other."

 

"Do I need to make you ready as you made me ready?"

 

"If you wish, but I have a fragrant oil if you..."

 

"Only if it smells like you."

 

Alex's face was luminous with his pleasure in those simple words. He gasped as Walter's hands lifted him with ease. The tongue that worked its way inside him was gentle, thorough and left him panting with need. His body opened joyously to receive the huge cock of his lover.

 

Walter moved slowly, savouring the feel of the virgin passage he was pushing deeper into with each thrust. Alex's hands clutched at him as he bottomed out, the soft moan zinging through Walter straight to his cock.

 

The big man began to pound into the boy under him. The only sounds in the room, the panting of two greatly aroused men as they strained against each other.

 

Walter's bellow of release so loud it was heard on the next tier. The boy's shout lost against the throat he had been sucking on. Walter rolled over, taking the boy with him so that he lay on Walter's chest.

 

When he could breath again, Walter cupped the boy's face and kissed him tenderly. They slept for a while and when they woke, Walter took the boy inside him again. This time he made no move to pull away when they were finished and the boy kissed the chest he rested on gently.

 

Alex was naive enough that he had expected things would go smoothly after the completion of the circle. He was still young and had no experience with stubborn alpha males who refused to see that the universe could not be controlled as they wished.

 

The boy's attempts at public communication were rebuked, sending him to the ships psychiatrist for more therapy. He was finally bonded to a man he knew he had loved in all his lives, only to have that man deny them both.

 

He had tried to talk to the Captain to explain that the mating was now a necessary part of their well being but Walter refused to listen. The Captain had even gone so far as to arrange for the area of the ship the boy was in to have a unique air supply. Therefore making sure that the scent of the boy could not affect him.

 

Dana and John watched in silence as long as possible. Dana growing more and more concerned over the boy's health. He had begun losing weight, he was back to having the dreams which disrupted his sleep cycle.

 

Walter had begun to snap at the crewmembers. His sleep populated with images of the boy's face as he had looked at the moment of his climax as he whispered Walter's name.

 

Finally one day Dana and John cornered Walter in his quarters.

 

"What do you two want? I'm busy so make it fast."

 

"Captain, we're concerned about Ensign Skinner."

 

Walter's face showed a brief flicker of worry but that was quickly covered with anger.

 

"Doctor, it is your responsibility to see to the crewmembers' health. You should not need to come to me over such matters."

 

"Damn it, Walter, stop this. Dana and I have both told you that you are bonded to the boy now. Why the hell are you torturing him and yourself this way?"

 

"John, I'll thank you to remember that I *am* your Captain. Just because you enjoy a boy doesn't mean that everyone does. I'm not gay. It was just a physical reaction to his scent. As long as I don't smell him, I can get on with my job and he can do his. When we next go in for replacements, I'll have him transferred."

 

"That won't happen, Captain. I have filed my report listing you as his mate and command will not send him to another ship without me stating that the bond is fully formed."

 

"What the hell are you talking about? I fucked him and completed the damn circle with him. Now he can go his way and I can go mine. It's no different from getting a divorce. I don't love him and I don't want to spend my life with him."

 

John moved forward into his Captains personal space, head back to look into the glaring eyes.

 

"Walter, I never thought I would say this but you are a coward and a fool. That boy loves you. He may have been wrong to begin the bond without you knowing what it entailed but that's over and done. It's time for you to face facts. Do you want to spend the rest of your life without sex?"

 

"It'll wear off, won't it? I mean if we aren't around each other?"

 

"No, Captain. It doesn't work that way. I told you Alex's people mate for life. Why is it you trust my medical judgment on everything else but not on this?"

 

"There has to be something that can be done. I don't want this."

 

"You stubborn idiot! Do you want the boy's death on your conscience?"

 

Before Walter could answer her the door signal sounded. John opened the door to find Alex standing in the corridor.

 

"I was told to report." The hope in his eyes made John even angrier with his Captain.

 

"Yes, Ensign. I wanted you to come up. We've been discussing your situation with the Captain. We thought he needed to see with his own eyes that you are not well."

 

"Doctor, I'm fine. There was no need to trouble the Captain. May I be excused?"

 

Walter's eyes roamed over the boy. Noting in his usual analytical way the dark circles under each eye, the uniform hanging in loose folds on the thin frame, the light gone from the eyes. Walter had seen men give up on life before. He just never expected it to be because of him.

 

Dana and John watched as their Captain assessed the man standing with head bowed, waiting to be rejected once more. They both recognized the battle-taking place before them.

 

Walter Krycek was a strong man who made few mistakes in his life and had always taken full responsibility for them. Looking at the wasting figure standing in front of him he realized he had made a huge one this time.

 

"Come in, Ensign. You are just in time to join me for dinner. Doctor, Number One, is there anything else you need?"

 

"No, Captain. We'll be on our way. I'll see that the kitchen sends up a vitamin drink with the Ensign's dinner. You will see that he drinks it all, won't you?"

 

"Yes, Doctor. I'll make sure the Ensign eats a proper dinner."

 

Walter turned his back and began to set up the table for dinner. He didn't watch as Dana and John left and pushed the boy inside. When Walter turned around, Alex was standing just inside the door where John had placed him. His eyes down looking at the floor, barely breathing, waiting for the rejection he was sure would be forthcoming.

 

Even stubborn men must eventually face facts. Walter didn't like realizing that not only had he fucked up as a man this time but also as a Captain. A good Captain would never let a crewmember's health deteriorate to the degree he saw here.

 

"Come, have a seat, Alex. I'll fix us some tea while we wait for dinner."

 

Alex went to sit at the small table in the corner of the room. He accepted the cup of tea that was placed before him adding sugar and sipping slowly. He answered every question put to him by the Captain but never once looked up at him. His answers were monosyllabic when ever possible.

 

The Captain allowed this to continue through dinner. At one point practically ordering Alex to eat. When Alex swore he couldn't eat any more the Captain just instructed him to finish the drink so the Doctor wouldn't come after them both. The drink was hurriedly choked down then the Ensign rose from his seat.

 

"May I be excused, Captain?"

 

He didn't wait for an answer just started toward the door, only to be stopped when the Captain's hand closed on his wrist.

 

"Look at me, Alex."

 

"I can't, Captain." His voice was thick with pain.

 

"Why not? Am I that ugly?"

 

"No, Captain. You are a very handsome man."

 

"Then why won't you look at me?"

 

"Because the Captain has made it very clear that I am not wanted. Please, may I go?" The whisper held so much anguish that Walter flinched.

 

"So, even though you desire me, you don't want to look at me?"

 

"I'm afraid to, Captain."

 

"Why?"

 

"Because it will probably trigger my mating pheromones. The rejection is difficult enough when I'm not aroused, I don't think I can take it while I'm in heat."

 

Alex tried to pull free then but Walter's hand tightened. Pushing the chair back from the table, he pulled Alex into his lap. The boy struggled until he was too tired to do so, then hid his face against the strong shoulder of the man holding him. A ragged 'Please' the only sound he made.

 

Walter uttered "Privacy mode" and held on to his future.

 

Walter sat there holding the boy until he fell into a fitful sleep. Lifting him, he carried him to the bed, undressed him and covered the frail looking body with a blanket. He sat for a long time watching him sleep before he rose and went to see his First Officer.

 

The First Officer unlike his Captain had no problems with the fact that he enjoyed men. His current relationship was with Yeoman Jack Mann, someone he was beginning to think he could spend his life with. Jack was a real beauty by any standards. He was average height for an Earther, around five eleven. His hair was thick and wavy a rich auburn and he had green eyes much like Alex's. John often wondered why he wanted to be with Mr. Dumbo as he had heard himself called as a child.

 

He was curled around Jack, still buried inside him, in no hurry to leave the hot tight body when the door signal sounded. He asked the computer who it was and when he heard it was the Captain, he pulled slowly and reluctantly out of Jack's body. The soft sigh of the other man making him smile.

 

John grabbed a towel to wipe the come mixed with lube from his dick as he smiled at Jack tenderly. Yeah, they should discuss a contract and soon. His smile grew as Jack shifted to a sitting position on the bed and pulled the sheet up to cover his reawakening cock.

 

John answered his door stark naked and Walter could see one of the Yeomen propped in the bed naked chest gleaming in the candlelight. The smells of sex were heavy in the room. Walter couldn't help but take in a deep lung full.

 

The contented look on John's face and the odours told him that they had at least completed round one, the scent coming from Jack told him round two would have been coming up soon if he hadn't knocked on the door.

 

"Sorry, I guess I'm interrupting."

 

"No, Captain. We were just sharing the afterglow. Unlike some people, I don't deprive myself of pleasure. Especially not when the man is beautiful and willing. Do you need to talk? Jack can come back later."

 

"Sure, John." The man in the bed rose, totally unconcerned to be naked in front of his Captain. He pulled on his clothes and kissed John unhurriedly on his way out.

 

"I'll call you when we finish."

 

"OK."

 

Walter had watched the exchange between the two men and wondered why he was still having so much trouble adjusting to his situation. After all he was now bonded, homosexuality was accepted on almost all planets where human's lived, and the service would only separate him and Alex if they asked to be assigned for short periods to work special projects.

 

Walter suddenly realized he wanted to have that look of contentment on his face. That he wanted to start his day buried in Alex's warm body. That he wanted the pleasure he had *only* felt with the boy sleeping in his bed.

 

John picked up a robe and pulled it on sensing that the Captain would be more comfortable talking if he were clothed. He watched as the Captain paced in the small space available for a couple of minutes. Finally the Captain sat and John still waited.

 

"John, how much do you know about my home world?"

 

"Not a lot. Your people are pretty closed mouthed."

 

"Yeah, we're like a family with a dirty little secret."

 

"Secret?"

 

"Homosexuality is not tolerated on my planet, John. Women outnumber men three to one and do not conceive easily. There is heavy government pressure to keep the population up so that we can be completive, so having sex with a man is considered the ultimate sin against the people."

 

"Is that why very few men from your world enter the service?"

 

"Yes. It's considered acceptable for a woman to leave if she hasn't conceived by her twentieth season but they try to keep all the men at home for stud service if nothing else. I was allowed to leave because testing showed I wasn't fertile."

 

"Is that why you never had sex with anyone who might be relationship material?"

 

"Partly, yes. Intellectually, I know that not all women want children but the shame I felt at my failure made me back away from anything lasting. It was easier to ease my body alone or with paid companions."

 

"Why are you telling me this? You should be telling Alex."

 

"I'm telling you because I value you not just as a First Officer but as a friend. And because I needed to say it to someone else to get it straight in my mind before I try to explain it to him."

 

"Where is he? Did you get him to eat?"

 

"Yes, he ate, but only because I ordered him to. I held him until he fell asleep."

 

"Did you...?"

 

"No. He wasn't... he didn't...smell. He barely talked to me, wouldn't look at me. I've hurt him so badly. Hell! I've shown more kindness to enemies than I have him."

 

"He'll understand and forgive you. Now get back there and talk to him."

 

The crewmembers that were up and about stared in surprise as the Captain walked quickly down the corridor and entered the Ensign's room. He packed all the Ensign's personal things and carried them back to his quarters.

 

Good thing he was Captain, he wouldn't have to wait for larger quarters to become available for himself and his mate. He hummed tunelessly as he put away the clothing, then he undressed and slipped into the bed next to the restless sleeper.

 

He pulled Alex into his arms and smiled as the warm body pressed close a little sigh the only sound in the room. He did not however smile the next morning when he woke and his bed was empty.

 

Every head in the maintenance bay turned as the Captain stalked through the room. It had only taken one question to the ships computer to know where his wayward Ensign was located. Had the air supply been restored to normal, he could have found him by scent.

 

Alex's head rose when the man he was working with gasped. He was surprised to find his Captain heading toward them with a scowl on his face. He turned back to his work as if the fire breathing giant was not moving toward him at a speed he would not have thought possible in one so big. The Captain looked at the man next to Alex.

 

"Excuse us, Ensign."

 

"Aye, Captain." The Ensign moved a discrete distance from Alex and the Captain.

 

"Alex, I didn't like waking up alone. Please wake me for a goodbye kiss before you leave in the mornings from now on."

 

Alex's head jerked up and he looked into the deep brown eyes. He stood very still as the Captain cupped his face and kissed him softly, then stood staring open mouthed as the Captain turned and walked away. Walter stopped a few feet away and turned back.

 

"I'll see you in *our* quarters after my shift tonight."

 

Alex nodded slowly, still not believing his ears. He watched as every eye in the place followed the Captain's exit. The other Ensign moved back to the job they had been working on and nudged Alex when he still stood staring.

 

"Please, pinch me. I need to know I'm not dreaming." He yelped loudly as the other Ensign did indeed pinch him.

 

Walter had started his day by having the restrictions taken off the air supply system. He had decided he wanted to be able to find Alex without asking the computer. Doggett had nodded his approval and when he broke for lunch, he went to let the Doctor know the Captain was finally coming around.

 

That evening the Captain had been detained on the bridge when Doctor Mulder came up to give him a report on an accident that had occurred in engineering that day. She and First Officer Doggett were wrapping things up when Walter trailed off in mid sentence.

 

"Thank you, Doctor. It's good to know no on....."

 

His head rose, his nostrils flared, lungs expanded to breathe deeply. They watched, as the Captain -- sporting an obvious erection -- exited the room at a dead run.

 

"Think I should warn people to get out of his way?" Dr. Mulder asked with a deadpan expression.

 

"Why? I have a feeling this is going to happen on a regular enough basis that everyone will learn to get out of his way."

 

She didn't need to worry. Word had gotten around about the Captain's visit to the maintenance bay that morning so no one was really surprised to see him running toward his quarters, preceded by his hard–on.

 

By the time he entered his quarters, speech was a forgotten ability. Alex turned from the candles he was lighting to smile at the big man ripping his clothes off. He had just enough time to call for privacy mode before Walter lifted him up, ravishing his pretty pink mouth.

 

Had he been asked later how they got on the bed or how he got inside Walter he wouldn't be able to tell them. It seemed as though one minute he was being held aloft while having his tongue sucked half out of his head. The next he was screaming as he shot in Walter's body then falling forward to lie on the back of the panting man.

 

When the seal released he rolled over and Walter turned on his side to look at him. The apprehension in the boy's eyes pained him more that anything else ever had. He reached out and caressed the face, his thumb trailing over the full lower lip.

 

"Do you have any control over that scent?"

 

"It happens when I get aroused. So, I guess I have some control. Why?"

 

"Will you try to save it for after I get here next time? I think I may have knocked over a couple of people on the way down here."

 

"Do you mean I'm going to stay here? That you want to be with me?"

 

"Yes. I know I treated you badly. I'm sorry. Let's eat dinner and afterwards I'll try to explain it to you."

 

The smile on Alex's face stole his breath. The boy was indeed beautiful and Walter knew he would be the envy of many in the years to come.

 

Over the next week, the crew learned to dodge the Captain if he was seen running through the corridors. Other members of the crew noticed the difference in the boy's scent but to them it was just a pleasant woodsy smell. It did however tell them that the Captain would soon appear and if, by chance, the boy was far from their quarters, crew members would make themselves scarce.

 

It was the seventh day after the boy had moved into the Captains quarters that Dr. Mulder was summoned by a frantic sounding Captain to come to his quarters.

 

"Captain, what is it?"

 

"He's hurt, Doctor. He's bleeding."

 

"Walter, it's not much, I'll be fine. I don't need the doctor."

 

Dana looked over at the furiously blushing boy, who was clutching the covers up under his chin.

 

"Let me be the judge of that, Alex. Where are you bleeding?"

 

"I'm fine, honest. It's just a little blood."

 

"Are you bleeding from your rectum?"

 

The blush on the face intensified, giving her all the answer she needed.

 

"Turn over and let me examine you."

 

She opened her bag and pulled on gloves, while removing a tube of lubricant. When she turned back, Alex was still sitting in the same position with the covers gripped so tightly his knuckles were white.

 

"Alex, let the doctor examine you. I need to know how badly I've hurt you."

 

"You didn't hurt me. It's just a little blood. It happens sometimes. At least that's what I've read."

 

"Alex, you are right that sometimes it does happen but I still need to make sure it is a superficial injury that will heal on its own and not one that will need sutures. Now let me look."

 

"No!"

 

Walter had lost all patience. He was a man of action and his lover needed to be cared for. He walked to the bed, grabbed the end of the blankets and ripped them out of Alex's hands. Flipping the startled Alex onto his stomach, he straddled him to hold him in place for the doctor.

 

Dana sat next to the two men, ignoring her Captain's equipment that was peeking through the opening of his robe. She gently spread the boy's cheeks and barely managed to contain the gasp. There was very little blood as Alex had said but that wasn't the problem.

 

She examined him as gently as possible but he still moaned. The tears were superficial and should heal rapidly if the area was left alone for a few days. The area around his anus was swollen and irritated. Also when she went in, expecting him to be lubricated enough not to need to add much to her gloves, she found him to be very dry.

 

She opened her bag, removed a hypo and gave him an antibiotic. Then motioned to the Captain to let him roll back over.

 

"Well, is he going to be all right?"

 

"He'll be fine. Alex, no penetration until further notice. And I want you to soak in a warm tub for at least a half hour at night. I'll give the kitchen a special diet for you for the next few days. Don't eat anything that isn't on my list."

 

"It's my fault, isn't, doctor? I was too rough with him."

 

Dana looked around the room before she spoke. "Captain, what are you using for a lubricant?"

 

"What?"

 

"To facilitate intercourse."

 

"I..." the Captain looked puzzled.

 

"We get each other ready orally, doctor." Alex explained looking as puzzled as his lover.

 

"Well, that's fine for you with him but he should be using something more with you."

 

"What do you mean?"

 

"Your saliva has different properties from the Captain's, Alex. Yours has evolved along with your other chemical make-up and works quite well for anal sex. It stays wet longer than the Captain's does. It's thicker as well."

 

"I didn't know that."

 

Alex was blushing again. He was worried that Walter would see this as just one more thing that was wrong with their relationship. Little did he know that Walter was so addicted to him by that point that nothing would make him reconsider the relationship.

 

"It never occurred to me that we needed more. What should we use, doctor?"

 

Dana didn't miss the happy smile on Alex's face as Walter asked his question.

 

"I'd leave this with you but since he is restricted until I say he is ready, I suggest you ask Doggett."

 

"What!?"

 

"John has been in same sex relationships for years I'm sure he can give you advice about what works better than I could. And it's not like he doesn't know about the two of you."

 

She smiled at the blush that had begun working it's way up the Captain's face. She packed up her supplies and turned to leave when the Captain spoke again.

 

"Doctor, does this mean I shouldn't..."

 

She turned to see the blush had intensified to scarlet.

 

"Shouldn't what?"

 

"You know, kiss him there...I mean when he is ready again."

 

"Captain, you may kiss, lick, suck anything you want. Just lubricate that big thing before you put it inside him."

 

She exited quickly before the giggles burst out. Both of the men she left behind had turned almost purple at her words. It always amazed her that her Captain could face down the most horrible of aliens but was embarrassed to discuss sex with his ship's doctor.

 

Walter called for privacy. His robe landed on the chair. He picked up the covers and arranged them on the bed. He slipped into the bed and pulled Alex close.

 

"I'm sorry I hurt you."

 

"You didn't do it on purpose. I should have done more research, then it wouldn't have happened."

 

"It's just as much my place to research this. I'll talk to John in the morning."

 

"Walter, why did you ask the doctor about...you know, kissing me there?"

 

"Because I've become quite fond of kissing you there. And I love the little breathy squeals you make when I stick my tongue in it. Got any problems with that?"

 

"No. None at all."

 

The next morning found the Captain outside Doggett's door. He knocked and the door slid open. John was sitting at the table with his coffee. Jack was pulling on his boots. He rose, said a polite good morning to his Captain before kissing John goodbye and heading out the door.

 

"He's on duty this morning?"

 

"Yes. What brings you here this morning, Walter?"

 

"I need some advise and Dana suggested I ask you."

 

"Really? What kind of advise?"

 

John hid his smile behind his coffee cup as his Captain blushed. The last few weeks had opened many new doors for his Captain. John was being vastly entertained watching him learn. Even more entertaining was watching how the boy was wrapping his big bear of a Captain around his little finger.

 

"I hurt Alex last night."

 

"What? I thought you were past all that homophobic bullshit."

 

"It's not like that, John. Give me a chance to tell you."

 

"All right. What happened?"

 

"I hurt him physically. I made him bleed. It wasn't on purpose."

 

Walter held up his hand placating, as he saw the storm clouds forming on his first officer's face. He knew John and Dana were both very protective of his mate. It was reassuring actually. He knew they would watch over the boy when he wasn't around.

 

"Go on. How did it happen?"

 

"I...well... Ah fuck. Dana said we need to use some sort of lubricant."

 

"What have you been using?"

 

"She said that it was fine for Alex to get me ready the way he does but I need to use more with him."

 

"Walter, will you just tell me what you two have been using?"

 

Walter suddenly found the floor to be of great interest. "Saliva."

 

"Jesus! No wonder you made him bleed. You've been fucking him with nothing but spit to ease the way. Hasn't he shown any discomfort?"

 

"Fuck no! Do you think I'm so selfish that I would take pleasure from him at the cost of his pain?"

 

"No, I'm sorry. So, Dana sent you to ask me what I use with Jack?"

 

"Yeah. She said you had been in these types of relationships a long time and could give me better advice than she could. Alex offered some oil when we were together the second time but I didn't pack any of the bathroom things when I moved him to my cabin. Maybe I should get that?"

 

"Let me get dressed and we'll go see what he has. I'll just tell you now oil is not the best option. It works in a pinch but there are better things to use."

 

Walter tried to keep his eyes elsewhere but he was drawn to look at John. He felt no lust for him as he did when he looked at Alex but it was interesting to actually notice the play of muscles as John moved. He wondered if Jack enjoyed John as much as he enjoyed Alex.

 

They found Alex's quarters as Walter had left them. He went into the bathroom and returned with the oil. John took it and read the label quickly. He opened it and sniffed before pouring a small amount into his palm. Walter watched as he rubbed his fingers in the oil until his hand absorbed it.

 

"Walter, this would be great for softening rough skin but would only do for a very short and fast fuck. You don't strike me as the kind to want nothing but short fast fucks. Are you?"

 

"Sometimes, but I find that I like staying inside him. I enjoy making it last."

 

The blush was back. This time John didn't bother to hide his grin. He liked the way Walter's eyes had gone soft as he said 'him'. His Captain might not know it yet but he was in love.

 

"Come on, let's go shopping."

 

John led Walter through the corridors until they reached the ship's store. He moved toward the personal section. At this time of the morning on a Sunday it was empty. Walter was glad to see that. He didn't want his sex education taking place in front of half his crew.

 

"Walter, Jack likes this one."

 

He handed Walter the sample tube, watching as Walter squeezed a small amount onto his fingers.

 

"Rub them together. Feel the consistency? I use this one on him when I know we don't have a lot of time, when he needs to get to work soon. Like this morning."

 

"Why?"

 

"Because it doesn't stain."

 

"Stain?"

 

"You have noticed that there is a little leaking after?"

 

"Ohhhh." Walter stuttered as his face flamed again.

 

"This one I use when we want to take our time. I like the way it works better for the long slow fucks. It's thicker, requires more clean up, but works great for fisting."

 

"Fisting?"

 

"I forget you both are novices at this. Maybe we should set aside some time to discuss alternate forms of pleasure. But that can wait until you two are finished with the honeymoon. Fisting is just what it sounds like. You insert you entire hand into your partner's anus."

 

"Sounds painful."

 

"It can be, if proper care isn't taken."

 

"You've done this?"

 

"With Jack, twice. A few times with previous partners."

 

"But doesn't that make regular sex...?" Doggett wondered if it was possible for his Captain to spontaneously combust.

 

"It's not like it loses its shape, Walter." John's tone was gentle; he didn't want to embarrass Walter to the point that he would hesitate to come to him for advice in the future.

 

Walter looked down at his big hands and thought about the tiny hole he had stretched the night before with just the circumference of his cock. He didn't believe there was any way he could do that to the boy he had left sleeping in his quarters.

 

"I can read your mind. It would fit but maybe you might want to let Alex do it to you first."

 

"Jack's done that to you? Sorry, that's none of my business."

 

"I don't mind you asking. I have no problem with answering questions. No, Jack hasn't done it to me. Jack is very much a bottom and since I've always been so dominant, it works well for us."

 

"When are you going to register a contract? I mean I know you've been seeing each other since our last trip out."

 

"He's a gorgeous man, Walter. Why would he want to tie himself to me?"

 

"Maybe because he's in love with you."

 

"What?"

 

"Alex told me. He overheard him tell one of the crew members that he wasn't interested in seeing anyone else because he was in love."

 

"When did he say that?"

 

"Alex told me it happened before you and Dana forced me to pull my head out of my ass. He asked me if I thought he ought to tell you."

 

"He's never said it to me."

 

"Have you told him?"

 

"No. I have been thinking about asking him for a limited contract, in the hopes of him wanting to amend it later. Thanks for telling me."

 

"You're welcome. Now can we finish up here before the place gets busy and Alex wakes up and finds me gone?"

 

"Sure. Here check these out. They're flavoured, totally edible."

 

"Why would you want...John, do you really go in for all this..."

 

Walter's hands waved around at the displays they were standing next to. Lubes weren't the only thing available. Most of the *items* he was almost afraid to ask about.

 

"Walter, there are many pleasures to be had from your relationship. I know right now what you are doing seems like all you will ever want or need but think about it for a minute. You will be spending the rest of your life with Alex."

 

"What? Are you saying that he will get bored with me?"

 

"Bored is a feeling I don't think he will ever know with you. And you know why? Because you wouldn't be out here if you didn't enjoy adventure. Sex can be an adventure. It can be *fun*. Why limit yourself to vanilla when there are so many flavours to try."

 

John opened a tube of watermelon-flavoured lube and waved it under Walter's nose. The odour hit him and he smiled. Watermelon was one of the first earth fruits he had tasted and he had loved it from the beginning.

 

"You like these? I mean you and Jack use these?"

 

"Jack prefers strawberry and I like Jack tasting like coconut."

 

"So you put it in you or..."

 

"No, I coat his cock with it, then lick it off slowly, before I deep throat him. That way when he comes I get both, his wonderful taste mixed with the coconut."

 

"Alex and I haven't done that."

 

"You mean to tell me you haven't given each other head?"

 

"Alex's anatomy is different. He's afraid he will be in too deep and cut off my air supply."

 

"That explains one side but not the other."

 

"I won't ask him to do to me what I can't return."

 

"You can still lick and kiss. Plus, I think after you two have been together for a while, you'll be able to gauge when he is close and pull back."

 

Walter returned to his quarters later with both types of lube John had suggested. His bag also contained three bottles of scented massage oil. At the last minute he had grabbed the watermelon and chocolate flavoured lubes as well.

 

Alex was still snoozing. Walter put his purchases away, undressed and slipped back into his warm bed, pulling his lover into his arms.

 

Alex snuggled close and Walter caressed his hair gently. Walter had made a comment about how he loved playing with his hair and Alex hadn't cut it since. Long hair was the fashion on Alex's home world. He had opted for a short cut during his training. Since there were no restrictions on length, just on how it was worn while on duty, he was letting it grow.

 

He was surprised when a sleepy voice spoke.

 

"Where were you?"

 

"Shopping with John. He's offered to set aside time to talk to me about 'alternate forms of pleasure'."

 

"Sounds interesting. May I be there for this talk?"

 

"I think I'd rather you talked to Jack or at least let me get more comfortable with this. I told John what you heard Jack say."

 

Alex twisted so he could look at Walter.

 

"What did he say? He isn't going to dump Jack, is he? Jack hasn't told him because he's worried that John doesn't want a serious relationship."

 

"No, he isn't going to dump him. John is very much in love with Jack. I wouldn't be surprised to have them registering a temporary contract by this time tomorrow."

 

"Good, I'm happy for Jack. Now, did you get what we need?"

 

"Yes, I did. John recommended several types. I even got something we can experiment with if you want. It won't involve us doing anything the doctor said we shouldn't. Let's go take a shower then we can play."

 

"I like the sound of that."

 

As Alex rolled over and rose from the bed the odour reached Walter.

 

"Stop that! I need to keep my wits at least until after we bathe."

 

"Yes, Sir. Captain, Sir."

 

Alex ran and Walter laughed as he chased him into the bathroom. He rushed them through bathing and then led Alex back to their bed. He positioned the boy on his back with his legs spread. Alex smiled up at him as he opened the bedside drawer to remove a rather large tube.

 

"Not planning on shopping often?"

 

"Don't think the size is any indication of the amount of time it will last. This is flavoured, watermelon, my favourite."

 

"Flavoured? Why do you need..."

 

Alex gasped as Walter squirted a large amount onto his cock. The gasp was quickly followed by a purr as Walter began to stroke him to spread the thick lube evenly.

 

"That feels so good."

 

"I'm going to make you feel even better."

 

Alex arched up as Walter's hot mouth covered the head of his cock. His hands scrabbled for Walter's ears, the only part of his head he could latch on to.

 

"Walter, no, don't. We talked about this, I can't let you do this."

 

Walter let Alex slip from his mouth but kept his hand wrapped firmly around him.

 

"Alex, John and I talked about this. He pointed out that I could still lick and kiss you. If we go slowly I should be able to suck you for a little while. It's just the head that forms the seal isn't it?"

 

"Yes. I don't want to do anything that might hurt you. Walter, I'm afraid I might kill you."

 

"Not going to happen. This time I'll just suck it for a little while then I'll lick it clean and use my hand to get you off."

 

"Walter, please. I couldn't stand it if I..."

 

"Alex, I want to do this with you. I want you to do it to me. Trust me, atsutsa."

 

Alex looked into the eyes of his mate seeing the confidence there. He knew Walter was considered one of the best captains in the fleet and you don't gain a reputation like that without cause, so he allowed himself to relax back into the pillows.

 

"Promise if I touch your head, you will pull back right away."

 

"You have my word."

 

Alex gave a slight nod and, as Walter covered his cock head with additional lube, he sighed. Walter bent and his mouth took Alex in again. Alex put one hand on his thigh next to but not touching the baldhead of his lover.

 

Walter sucked slowly, savouring the taste of Alex mixed with watermelon. This was Walter's first time doing this so he just did what he knew he liked when it was done to him. His mind telling him that it didn't matter too much if he wasn't an expert since the man he was doing it too was a virgin in this area.

 

Once he had the head cleaned, he teased the slit, rubbing his tongue against it, then pushing in to get pure Alex flavour. The noises coming from Alex let him know he was on the right track. He ran his tongue around the head, tracing the shape. Alex's hand twitched but he didn't touch Walter's head.

 

Moving to the shaft, he sculpted the vein with his tongue, enjoying the flavour of watermelon. Turning the cock carefully in his hand he licked and sucked until all traces of lube were gone. Raising up, he smiled at the picture of Alex lying limp, legs spread, head arched back, throat exposed, chest heaving as he panted.

 

Looking down, his smile grew even wider as the now full size dick of his lover twitched. Alex's eyes opened to look at him, the lust turning them the deepest green. No words came, just a brief flexing of his hips raising him from the bed.

 

The smell of him intensified, Walter growled that deep territorial sound Alex had learned to love. Walter bent again and pulled Alex deep into his throat.

 

"NO! Walter, stop!"

 

Walter was beyond listening. He sucked, his hand curled around Alex's balls, squeezing just short of pain. Alex grabbed for Walter's ears yanking upward. Frantic to get him off before he lost control. He managed to get him up far enough so that only the head was still in Walter's mouth as he lost it and began to shoot.

 

Walter growled once more before he was forced to swallow. Alex was torn between his fear and a climax he was sure would blow the top off his head. The cock head swelled, filling Walter's mouth, shaping itself to seal the opening.

 

Had Walter been a less confident person, he might have panicked. Some would have lost it from any number of phobias. Walter merely stilled, other than swallowing his lover come and waited for the seal to release.

 

The fear in Alex's eyes slowly subsided when his hands gave him proof that his lover was breathing. Walter's hands moved over Alex in a soothing manner. Alex lay there panting as he waited for his dick to soften.

 

A different fear was in his eyes when the seal broke and Walter moved up to lie next to him.

 

"Walter, I'm sorry I tried..."

 

"Hush, atsutsa. I wanted to taste you. I want you to taste me. I'm glad it happened; now you won't have to worry when I want to do it again. Although I'm sure my ears are going to be sore. Next time, don't pull so hard."

 

"You aren't angry?"

 

"Angry? Why should I be? You didn't force me."

 

"But being stuck like that..."

 

"Well, I will admit it's awkward but we'll just need to try a different angle next time."

 

"You really want to do it again?"

 

Walter smiled at the wonder mixed with delight he saw in his lover's eyes.

 

"Yes, atsutsa. Again and again and again."

 

He pulled Alex close, ignoring his own still hard cock, for the moment wanting only to reassure him.

 

"Walter, what does atsutsa mean?"

 

"It's a term of affection. Now take a nap. I expect you to take care of me later."

 

Alex snuggled close and was soon sleeping as instructed.

 

++++++++++

 

Six months later when they returned to Earth for crew changes they registered their marriage contract and had the biggest wedding ever known in the fleet. Alex wore green to match his eyes and Walter ignored the 'I told you so' looks from Dr. Mulder and First Officer Doggett.

 

The party halted momentarily when the hardest nosed Captain in the fleet screamed his husband's name so loud he drowned out the band. Every eye in the room raised to the ceiling as the Ensign's scream echoed just a heartbeat behind. The band continued as if never interrupted and the guests partied until the wee hours of the morning.

 

Fin


	4. IV:  Space Dog

  
Author's notes: Doggett falls in love  
  
NOTES: The relationship in this story was originally mentioned in Regression (Space the 24th Century) a Skinner/Krycek story that can be found at my site if you are interested. For those of you who don't want me branching out to the Big Dog speak to Julie. It's all her fault. And you might want to speak to Josan as well since she wanted more of Doggett's relationship in this universe. Beta by Bill.  
  
NOTE II: The character Jack Mann is named for Josan. Please remind me never again to have two main characters who are doing the nasty named Jack and John. Gets very confusing.  


* * *

First Officer John Doggett was waiting for the new crewmembers to arrive. Normally the Captain greeted new crew personally, but he was stuck planet-side at a retirement party. John really didn't enjoy this aspect of his job. He was more a man of action, no nonsense, just like the first John Doggett in the twenty-first century had been. But he had served with his Captain for the last five years and would walk through fire if the man had asked.

 

The air lock finished cycling and the ensign standing nearby opened the door. All together, there were four new crewmembers coming on board, one human and the rest of various species.

 

The moment the human stepped onto the ship Doggett was lost; he just didn't know it yet. Yeoman Jack Mann was five eleven with rich auburn hair above dancing green eyes. John went through his usual speech and pretended not to notice that the yeoman was cruising him.

 

When the ensign moved to show the new arrivals to their quarters, Yeoman Mann brought up the rear. Doggett didn't believe for a minute that the yeoman stumbled, a body that beautiful had to be graceful. John reached out and steadied the other man.

 

"Thank you, Commander. Must be the change in gravity fields."

 

Doggett watched as a pretty pink tongue slipped between even white teeth to wet equally pretty pink lips. For the first time in his adult life, John Doggett was smitten.

 

Yeoman Jack Mann had transferred to a new command when a relationship on a previous ship ended. It wasn't a bad ending; it had been a mutual decision. They made fireworks in bed but had nothing else in common. After a while, they found that great sex was not grounds enough on which to build a relationship.

 

Jack was in his late twenties, and interested in having someone he could talk to when the fucking was over. Since he hadn't found that on his prior ship, he felt it was time to move to new territory. He had been pleased to hear that his new assignment was on the Sirius under Captain Walter Krycek.

 

Jack had come off the transport expecting to see the Captain because he had heard that the Captain met all new crew in person. But instead, he had walked out to find a first officer who made his cock stand up in his pants.

 

The first officer had apologized for the Captain's not being there to greet them, then gave a brief welcome speech that Jack didn't hear. He was too busy checking out John's reactions to his cruising maneuvers. Nothing appeared on the surface, so when they were dismissed to go to quarters, he moved to the rear of the group.

 

He pretended to stumble just as he reached Doggett. The hand that steadied him was strong and Jack's cock twitched in his pants. He looked into beautiful blue eyes. Never hurts to advertise, he licked his lips slowly, making sure that Doggett was watching.

 

John's hand had tightened on the arm he was gripping, his eyes tracked the movement of that tongue and he instantly got a mental image of that same tongue wrapping around the head of his cock. The green eyes sparkled at him and he knew he could have this man in his bed.

 

"I'm sure that's it, Yeoman. Take it easy until you get your space legs back."

 

"I'll do that, Commander. Thanks again."

 

John watched as the yeoman hurried to catch up with the rest of the group, enjoying the way his uniform pants fit around the firm ass. His lips curled up in a slow smile as he realized that the ship just got more interesting. He wasn't surprised when the yeoman asked to join him at dinner that night.

 

"Hello, Commander, may I join you?"

 

"We aren't so formal in the mess or off duty. Call me John."

 

"Please, call me Jack."

 

"Ok. So what made you decide to put in for a transfer? Wasn't the Cassiopeia a good ship?"

 

"I had no problems with the ship or the crew. My career just needed a change. I was pleased when the assignment came for the Sirius. The Captain is known as one of the best."

 

"That's true. I've served with him for five years now and can't imagine moving anywhere else."

 

"So, you and the Captain are *close*?"

 

Jack was surprised at how sad the idea made him feel. Having heard so much about Captain Krycek, he knew if John was involved with him that he stood no chance. Plus he didn't consider himself to be the home wrecker type.

 

John had watched the play of emotions in Jack's face as he asked his question. It was probably just his imagination but he thought Jack looked a little sad.

 

"He's my best friend. I'd trust him with my life. But we aren't lovers if that is what you are hinting at."

 

"I meant no disrespect."

 

John decided to see if the younger man was heading in the direction he thought he was. So, being the straightforward type, he laid it all out.

 

"Jack, let's cut to the chase, I hate mincing around things. I'm gay. From the way you accidentally stumbled into me earlier, I take it that you are as well."

 

John paused waiting for an answer.

 

"Yes."

 

"I normally wait and allow crewmembers to make the first move. I don't want a man in my bed who is feeling coerced in any way. I'm a very dominant top who enjoys making his lovers scream with pleasure. I'm on tier twelve in cabin ten. If you want to pursue this further, come around in an hour. If not, it will be as if this conversation never took place."

 

John rose from the table and left the mess. He made one stop on his way to his quarters. He hadn't had a lover in some time and he needed fresh lube, among other things.

 

Exactly one hour later Jack stood in the corridor outside Doggett's quarters. He had been so turned on by John's words in the mess that he had gone back to his quarters and jerked off.

 

Jack loved being submissive. He hadn't had a true D/S relationship since his first lover. The man had been thirty-five to his fifteen. He had learned how to please his Dom and, in turn, had been taken to heights of pleasure he had not known since.

 

He stood there barely breathing, a frisson of pure lust making him hesitate before signaling. The door slid open and John's deep voice called to him to come in. He stepped into the cabin and the doors closed.

 

"Privacy." John's low voice came from the bathroom.

 

"Jack, undress and lie on the bed on the towel I laid out for you."

 

He moved past the partition into the bedroom part of the cabin. The room had been done in shades of blue and green. The coverlet was neatly folded over the rack on the wall. A big fluffy towel laid spread out close to one side of the bed.

 

Jack undressed, folding his clothes carefully and placing them on the dresser. He could hear the water running in the bathroom and had little doubt as to what would happen to him in the next few minutes. The last time he had been given an enema, he had been twenty.

 

It had been his last night at the Academy, before his first assignment. He knew his Dom had his next sub picked out. He had seen the pretty boy just that afternoon as he arrived for his last night at the professor's house. He had been a little sad but had also known it was time to move on. He had become a man and had a future to live and a love to find.

 

Jack walked to the bed and lay down on the towel. He turned on his side so his back was toward the bathroom door. He pulled his legs up, positioning them to make it easy for John to give him the enema.

 

John walked out of the bathroom to find Jack naked as ordered. John smiled at seeing him on his side, legs pulled up out of the way. He sat next to the man on his bed and rubbed his back slowly.

 

"You've done this before?"

 

He knew the answer but wanted to see what information he could gather.

 

"Yes. It's not my most favorite thing, but it's usually followed by several of my favorite things."

 

John opened the bedside drawer and removed the lube. As he greased the small hole, he watched the profile for any sign of discomfort.

 

"Why don't you tell me what your favorite things are?"

 

The nozzle slipped in easily. John allowed the flow to start. Jack made a little breathy sound that went straight to John's cock.

 

"I enjoy sucking, especially mock forced sucking."

 

"Like your hair gripped as your mouth is fucked?"

 

"Yesss."

 

John noticed that Jack's cock had started to fill out.

 

"And anal? How do you prefer that? Face to face, on your knees, spooned?"

 

"All of those."

 

"I take it you like being fucked, period."

 

"Please... too much."

 

"You've only taken half the bag. How long since you've had an enema?"

 

"Seven years."

 

John closed off the flow and removed the nozzle. He pulled Jack over to lie on his back and rubbed his stomach gently. He decided conversation would be a good diversion.

 

"Tell me it hasn't been seven years since you've had sex."

 

"No. I just haven't been with anyone who was really Dom since I left the Academy. I told myself I didn't need the games any more. That it was just a crush. But the minute you used the word 'dominant' to me in the Mess, I knew that wasn't all there was to it."

 

John decided that was enough deep emotional conversation for tonight. He moved his hand farther down, wrapping it around Jack's cock and jacking him until he was erect. He watched Jack's face closely. Finally, he let him go and, standing, helped him up to go to the bathroom.

 

When Jack came out of the bathroom, it was to see John standing with his cock jutting out from his body. John pointed to the floor between his legs. Jack knelt obediently, opening to accept the thick cock into his mouth. John's hands threaded through his hair, gripping it strongly, as he uttered his first command to his new sub.

 

"Suck me, boy. And you'd better do it well or you won't be able to sit tomorrow."

 

Jack moaned around the hard dick that had begun thrusting into his very wet mouth. He hadn't realized how much he missed giving up control. John was very turned on and had plans for Jack's ass that would involve some control on his part so he thrust hard, fast and deep into the mouth and throat of the kneeling man, wanting to take the edge off so he could take his time in that beautiful ass.

 

He even ignored the fact that Jack had dropped one hand to his own leaking dick. He hadn't given him permission to jerk off, but they would discuss rules if this went past tonight. He rammed in deep and let go. John was very pleased to see that in this at least, Jack was very adroit. He swallowed every drop and moaned as John pulled his cock away.

 

John looked down at Jack's hand still working his erection.

 

"Come, boy." John's second order of the night was instantly obeyed, Jack's come spraying against the floor and John's legs.

 

He waited until they were both breathing easier, Jack still kneeling at his feet, his head lowered in submission.

 

"Clean us, boy and we'll nap for a while."

 

Jack looked up, his green eyes still fuck drunk.

 

"Am I staying?"

 

"Of course you are. You didn't think I was going to let you off that easily, did you?"

 

The smile was glorious, and John's heart was well and truly lost at that moment. Jack rose gracefully and went into the bathroom, returning quickly with a cloth that he used to clean John then the floor. He went back into the bathroom and ran the water briefly.

 

When he returned to the bedroom, John was waiting in the bed for him. Jack settled next to him and John pulled him close. Tilting Jack's head up, he kissed him slowly and deeply.

 

"Sleep. You're going to need the rest."

 

"Yes, Sir."

 

"John. I don't need words like sir and master to know that you know your place."

 

Jack smiled again. He said no more aloud, but inside he said a prayer that this man would want him for a long time to come.

 

John didn't sleep. He lay there, holding the most beautiful man he had ever had in his bed, and thought. It was obvious, not just from his words but also from his actions, that Jack had been involved in a Master/sub relationship.

 

While John was very dominant, he had not played heavy games in some time. Of course, consensual games were not frowned upon, there were even play rooms available on board, but he wasn't sure a D/s relationship was what he would want on a daily basis. He did want to play now and then, but he wasn't looking for a slave. His attitude earlier had been to gain information, not to indenture a slave.

 

So, he made up his mind to switch gears when Jack woke and see how that went. He already knew he wanted more than a one-night stand with this man. If for no other reason than Jack sure knew how to suck cock.

 

His hands roamed over the man, learning the feel of him, breathing deeply to learn his scent. He coaxed Jack onto his side so that his back was turned toward John. Reaching over him, John grabbed the lube and squeezed some onto his fingers, warming the gel, and then he slipped his fingers between warm cheeks.

 

John probed gently, working one finger in slowly, rotating and withdrawing then sliding back in. Jack stirred slightly, sighing, opening his legs, but not waking. John smiled and continued his exploration. There was just something so 'right' about having a lover respond in his sleep.

 

When he felt he had opened Jack enough, he withdrew his fingers. He coated his cock with lube, and then slotted it in the heat of Jack's cheeks. Holding on to a hip, he rocked back and forth, slowly pushing in deeper with each thrust. When he bottomed out, he lay still, enjoying being connected to the other man.

 

He was surprised when a sleep-rough voice spoke.

 

"You just gonna lie there? Or are you going teach me to like that fat thing in my ass?"

 

"Getting awfully pushy, aren't you?"

 

An auburn head turned to show him a cheeky grin. "Will that get me fucked quicker?"

 

"There was never any question that you would be fucked. The only question is how hard and how often. Got any sassy comebacks for that?"

 

"Ohhhhh, Commander, you're so forceful."

 

The long eyelashes batted a few times and John lost it. He laughed so hard his dick slipped from Jack's ass. Jack reached back to guide him back inside. When he got his laughter under control, he bit Jack's shoulder, receiving a deep throaty groan for his effort.

 

"Are you going to punish me now, Commander?"

 

"Your insubordination will not be tolerated, Yeoman. Punishment will be swift and merciless."

 

John rolled Jack over on to his stomach, and then positioned himself above him for the best leverage. Jack's legs spread wide, giving him the maximum access, hands gripping the bedclothes tightly, his breath held as John pulled out all but the tip.

 

The groan that issued from Jack as John rammed inside him was the most satisfying sound John had heard from anyone in a long time. John pounded into the body below him fast and hard, shifting positions slightly with each thrust until Jack's decibel level hit a pitch that told him he was hitting the right spot. Then John settled in to serious fucking.

 

He worked for several long minutes, enjoying the feel of the tight ass as it clung to him trying to keep him inside. John made a mental note to ask Jack later if he did exercises to keep himself so tight. His smile was territorial as Jack began to beg.

 

"Please! I need to come! For heaven's sake, let me come."

 

He emphasized his desire by beginning to rub against the towel under him, but John was having none of that. Rocking back on his knees, John gripped slender hips and lifted Jack up from the bed. Keeping a tight hold, he pressed down on a shoulder, arranging Jack so his dick was hanging free, with no chance of it touching anything for stimulation.

 

"Don't move! Keep your hands on the bed. *I* will tell you when you can come."

 

Jack made a mewing sound like a hurt kitten and John almost caved in. But he had told Jack that he was a Dom and he wouldn't go back on that this soon. John's earlier release plus his strong desire to fuck this man into next week was making him last.

 

He went back to his serious fucking of the beautiful man. His hands moved over his back and ass, as he pumped hard into him. He noticed that the place he had bitten was turning the most wonderful shade of purple. He liked that. He had always liked marking his lovers and was pleased that Jack bruised well.

 

The sounds coming from the other man were a chorus John wanted to hear often. As the timbre became more needy, John's control began to erode. He felt his balls tightening and knew he was close.

 

Leaning forward, he pulled Jack up so his back was against John's chest. He wrapped his hand around the leaking dick of the other man, stroking slowly, gently.

 

"When I tell you to come, I expect you to obey me or your next punishment will be sleeping alone tonight. Do we understand each other?"

 

"Yes, Commander." Jack barely had enough air to get the words out.

 

John stroked hard inside Jack and let go, bathing his insides with hot come. His hand tightened around Jack's cock and gave permission.

 

"Come, Yeoman."

 

Jack's scream was loud enough to be heard on the next tier. John rocked back on his heels, holding the quivering man tightly. With Jack still impaled they both fought for breath. When their panting stopped, John cupped Jack's face, turning him to look into the deep green eyes.

 

Covering the pink lips, John kissed him tenderly. Then he lowered them to the bed, still inside his new lover. He was almost asleep when Jack spoke again.

 

"You weren't lying when you said your lovers scream. Thank you."

 

"You're most welcome. Now let me sleep, please."

 

Jack snuggled back, trying to keep John inside as long as possible. He slipped into sleep before his muscles pushed the now soft cock from his body. When he woke, John was gone but there was breakfast waiting in the warmer for him with a note.

 

J

 

Thanks for letting me wake up to such an inspiring sight this morning.

 

J

 

Jack ate his breakfast, noting that John must have asked the ship's computer about his dietary preferences. There was the strong tea he favored over coffee, juice was the pineapple blend he liked, and there was no pork in sight. When he finished, he showered and returned to his quarters, since he wasn't on duty that day and was still a little wiped out from the fantastic climax he had experienced in John's bed.

 

He napped briefly then went to explore the ship. He entered the Mess that night looking for the First Officer and was disappointed to find him missing. A group at one of the tables invited him to sit with them, so he introduced himself and sat down to listen to the conversation. He had found over the years that listening was the best way to become acclimated.

 

During the conversation, someone spoke about the guests who were on board. One even commented that Number One once had a thing going with the new senator who was visiting. Jack figured that was why John wasn't in the mess.

 

He returned to his quarters after eating and hoped to find a message waiting. There was none and he sank down on his bed feeling a little depressed. He had only been with him one night and no promises had been made, but he had hoped it had been as fantastic for John as it had been for him. He wondered if John was renewing the relationship with the senator.

 

His depression grew as he neither saw nor heard from John over the next several days. He went about his duties with his usual attention to detail. After a week with no word, he decided that John must not want a return bout.

 

They had left the last port of call and were headed for the next when Jack saw John again. Jack was sitting in the Mess alone, having waited until later than normal for his evening meal. A warm hand landed on his shoulder. Looking up, he found blue eyes sparkling at him and a big smile showing John's even white teeth.

 

"Kinda late for dinner, isn't it? I went by your quarters, but since you weren't there, I asked the computer for a location."

 

He sat down next to Jack and snagged a grape from the fruit salad that had barely been touched.

 

"I ate lunch late. Did you need something?"

 

"You."

 

"Me?" Jack's tone gave away his surprise, the look that followed on his face his aggravation.

 

"What?"

 

"We had what I felt was a great time, then nothing, and now you waltz in... Nothing. Forget it!"

 

Jack got up, knocking his chair over in the process, and headed toward the exit. John sat with a stunned expression on his face watching the man stalk away. Eventually, he turned toward the computer panel.

 

"Computer, how long has it been since Yeoman Mann came on board?"

 

When John heard the answer, he understood Jack's reaction.

 

"Two weeks, three days, five hours, and thirty-three seconds."

 

"No wonder he's pissed. Where is he now?"

 

"On the observation deck."

 

"Thank you."

 

"You are welcome, Number One."

 

He rose and made his way to the observation deck. Jack was standing near one of the view plates, his stance giving away his anger. John approached him slowly.

 

"I told you I allow crewmembers to make the first move."

 

The back stiffened even more and he got no answer.

 

"What I didn't tell you is sometimes I get so caught up in my work that I forget to do anything other than bathe or sleep for days, sometimes weeks, at a time. During those times, prior lovers have had to drag me to bed if they wanted attention."

 

Still nothing.

 

"I'm lousy at apologizing as well. They all complained about that. Guess what I'm trying to tell you, in my own inept way is, when you want me, come and get me."

 

"I'm not the type to fuck around. I like exclusive for as long as it's good."

 

"I prefer that too, Jack."

 

"I heard you had a thing with the senator."

 

"Had being the operative word. He's married now and his husband was quite entertaining. I think he found the perfect man to marry."

 

John had taken a step closer as he spoke.

 

"So, if I feel you are pushing yourself too hard, I should drag you back to your quarters?"

 

"Yeah, think you can handle that?"

 

"I thought you were the Dom?"

 

"In the bedroom. Outside it, we are equals."

 

Equals. Jack liked the sound of that; he smiled at the stars before he turned to face John.

 

"Didn't you say something about needing me?"

 

"Yeah. I did."

 

John grabbed Jack's hand and pulled him toward an alcove that was designed for private viewing. Sitting on a bench there, he pulled Jack to stand between his legs. Opening Jack's pants quickly, he freed the still soft cock.

 

He covered it, even pulling most of Jack's balls into his mouth. He couldn't keep them in his mouth once the cock hardened, so he cradled them in his hands. Between John's talented mouth and hands caressing Jack's balls, he came quickly. He swayed in the aftermath and John pulled him down to sit on his lap.

 

He was sure they made a lovely picture, Jack with his pants around his knees, reclining back against John's chest as John's hands roamed under his shirt to pinch his nipples. Jack made a low groaning sound and turned his head to suckle at John's neck.

 

"Can we take this back to your quarters? I mean it's nice being felt up under the stars but I don't have any lube on me. And unless you do, we need to go where we can get some because I want you in me."

 

"I'll let you slide on that since I did say we were equal outside the bedroom. Let's go."

 

John pulled his hands out of Jack's shirt and Jack rose. When he reached for his pants, John pushed his hands aside.

 

"I opened them, I'll close them."

 

John led Jack through the quiet corridors to his cabin. Once there, he proceeded to fuck him until he forgot his name. When John dragged himself in the next night, he found a sleeping, naked Jack waiting for him in his bed. He decided he could get used to that.

 

Over the next month, Jack became very used to having John next to him at night. The sex was fantastic as well as warm in a way he had never known. His Dom had been very stern and strict with him. Lovers since then had been either wishy washy or very short term, with the last being explosive in bed and boring outside it.

 

But John was *fun*. He often made Jack laugh. They had long conversations about anything and everything. He held Jack after sex, staying inside him as long as possible. He bathed Jack as tenderly as one would a newborn. He made sure that Jack came every time they were together.

 

Jack felt cherished for the first time in his life. He was *happy*.

 

The port of call they next arrived at was to be a test of what Jack had been told. They had been there almost a week when John didn't come back to their cabin one night. Jack chalked it up to the duties of the first officer and went on with his own tasks the next day.

 

When he arrived at their cabin that night and there was no sign that John had been there, he inquired of the computer.

 

"Computer, where is Number One?"

 

"He is planet side, Yeoman Mann."

 

"How long has he been there?"

 

"Since 08:00 yesterday."

 

"Will you put me in contact with him, please?"

 

"Yes, Yeoman."

 

"Doggett."

 

"John, it's Jack. You've been gone for over thirty-four hours. When will you be back on board?"

 

"Probably not for some time."

 

"All right. Have you eaten?"

 

"Been too busy."

 

"Have you rested?"

 

"No, Jack. I had some Stim. I'm fine. I should be finished here by sometime tomorrow."

 

"When did you take the Stim?"

 

"Probably four hours ago."

 

"How many injections have you taken?"

 

"Two or three, I don't remember."

 

"Then it will be wearing off in about two hours. Don't take any more. Come back to the ship now and rest. There are others that can handle whatever you are doing."

 

"Jack, I'll be back tomorrow and we'll fuck like bunnies."

 

"This isn't about fucking, John. This is about your health."

 

"I'll see you tomorrow, Jack."

 

The communication cut out. Jack sat and stared at the panel for all of two seconds then he made up his mind.

 

"Computer, where on the planet is Number One?

 

"In the capital city at coordinates C15/F31."

 

"Thank you. Please arrange transport for me right away."

 

"Yes, Yeoman. The craft will be standing by."

 

Jack moved with purpose toward the launch bay. No one seeing him would have suspected the worry zinging through him. John's words had been dismissive and that had hurt. But he remembered the words of six weeks ago and was determined to be the equal outside the bedroom that John had said he was. He was also determined to show John that sex wasn't the only reason he was hanging around.

 

On the way down, he had time to get really worried. What if the comments on the observation deck had been just bullshit? John had sounded pretty dismissive, but then again if he had taken Stim two or three times, and compounded that with a lack of sleep and no food, he could become very unpleasant.

 

Mankind had found cures for many things, but had yet to replace the body's need to dream. Stim was considered to be harmless, unlike the so-called 'speed' used in the past. But Jack knew that most people never took it more than twice in forty-eight hours and they remembered to eat.

 

The small craft landed and Jack took a deep breath before stepping off the ramp. His eyes tracked around the landing area. Not spotting John, he moved into the crowd, following the direction in his head from the ship's computer.

 

Rounding a corner, he saw John talking with a group of techs from the ship. He walked to where they were standing and waited for John to finish his instructions. When John's eyes turned to him, he knew immediately that John needed to rest.

 

"Jack, what are you doing down here? I told you I'd be up tomorrow."

 

"I remember something you told me six weeks ago, too. About forgetting to take care of yourself. And... oh yes, ' when you want me, come and get me'. I'm here to get you."

 

"Jack, I'm busy. I'll be back tomorrow and you can keep me in bed for three days if you want."

 

"No. You're coming with me now."

 

"Oh, for fuck's sake, Jack, just go back to the ship and jerk off!"

 

Jack's eyes couldn't conceal the hurt. But his tongue still found words.

 

"You think this is about sex? Fine, I'll go back to the ship. One thing though."

 

"What?"

 

"That thing you said about being equals. I guess that was just bullshit, right?"

 

Jack spun on his heel and almost ran back to the craft. He threw himself inside and got out the order to return to the ship before the hot tears ran down his face. He managed to get himself under control by the time he docked in the launch bay.

 

He went straight to John's quarters and packed up the things he had slowly moved there. Back in his assigned quarters, he took a sedative and cried until his exhausted body took him down into sleep.

 

********

 

"Yeoman Mann, Number One would like you to meet him in his quarters."

 

"Please, tell him I'm unable to do that."

 

"Would you like to speak directly to him?"

 

"No, computer. I have no desire to speak with him. Just give him the message."

 

"Number one, Yeoman Mann is unable to meet you."

 

"Let me speak with him."

 

"I'm sorry, he does not wish to speak to you."

 

"Fine, let him pout. I need to sleep anyway."

 

John stomped down the corridor irritated as hell. He had been thinking of burying himself in Jack's tight heat all the way back from the planet. Fuck, it wasn't like he had been gone for a week. It had only been sixty hours.

 

He reached his quarters, took a long shower while jerking off and crawled into bed. Twelve hours later when he woke, he finally realized that all of Jack's things were gone.

 

"Computer, where is Yeoman Mann?"

 

"He is on the planet, Number One."

 

"Contact him for me."

 

"I can not do that Number One. He is on leave and requested complete privacy."

 

"Location, computer. Now!"

 

"Number One, is this a class A emergency? The Captain has not notified me of any hostile activity in this sector."

 

"No, computer. I just need to find the Yeoman."

 

"I'm sorry, but crewmembers on leave who request privacy are only to be disturbed during a class A emergency per fleet regulations. Should I request the Captain to declare a class A emergency?"

 

John swore under his breath. The last thing he needed was for the Captain to know he couldn't control his lover. He'd just have to go down and find Jack on his own. He thought, how hard could it be, right?

 

"Prepare a transport for me and program it to set down as close as possible to the Yeoman's last known location."

 

He spent the trip to the planet first cursing Jack, then himself. After thinking about it, Jack had every right to be angry. John had told him they were equals, had told him to come after him if he wanted him. Thinking back to the conversation, he knew that if Jack had spoken to him that way, he would have whipped Jack's ass.

 

The shuttle landed and he charged out like a man on a mission, which was pretty much how he saw it. He tried Jack's personal communicator first and got the twenty-fourth century equivalent of a busy signal, so he headed toward the sector that catered to gay travellers.

 

Four hours later, he was ready to admit defeat when he saw Jack being carried out of a bar across the street. It was obvious that Jack was unconscious. It was also obvious that he was about to end up sold as a pleasure companion.

 

John trotted across the street to the big man and tapped him on the shoulder.

 

"Excuse me. You have something that belongs to me."

 

The big man swung around to look at John.

 

"And what might that be?"

 

"Him."

 

"Really? He told me he was a free agent."

 

"Well, he's not. He's a member of the crew of the Sirius under Captain Walter Krycek. And he's my sub. So put him down. I'll take care of him until what ever you slipped him wears off."

 

"Since he's out, he can't verify your story. I know what he told me and I'm keeping him. When he wakes up, if he wants to come back to you, he can."

 

Suddenly there were three more men surrounding him. A knife appeared, followed by a pulse pistol, then a fist hit John solidly in the kidney. John went to one knee, and at the same time, managed to broadcast an alert code on his private communicator.

 

John drew his weapon and pointed it squarely at the big man who held Jack.

 

"You aren't taking what is mine. I'll send you to hell first."

 

"You fire at that setting and you'll probably kill him as well."

 

"At least, you won't have him."

 

The big man nodded at one of his companions and John figured he was as good as dead. But a voice rang out.

 

"John, are you not playing well with others?"

 

John didn't care at that moment how his Captain had gotten here; all he cared about was that he was here.

 

"Sorry, Captain, these gentlemen seem to think they can take Yeoman Mann with them. I've been trying to point out that he is part of our crew."

 

"Gentlemen, did you think an officer of the fleet would lie to you? The yeoman is indeed a member of my crew and he's overdue from leave. He will be punished for that infraction. Now, please be so kind as to hand him over to his crewmates here."

 

John had kept his weapon trained on the man as Walter spoke. He knew when the man decided it was time to withdraw. He handed Jack over to the crewmembers and they headed back toward the landing field.

 

The three men had faded into the crowd almost as soon as Walter spoke. Once Jack was in safe hands, he moved forward to stand next to John.

 

"Please, be so kind as to spread the word that anyone who messes with my crew in the future will answer directly to me."

 

Then his fist connected with the big man's nose and Doggett watched as blood sprayed out into the air. The man bellowed. Holding his nose, he nodded at Walter then ran. Walter's big paw slipped under John's elbow and he lifted him back onto his feet.

 

"Come on, John, let's get back to the ship."

 

"Call Mulder, Jack's been drugged."

 

"I could tell that, John. Now you want to tell me what asinine thing you did to send him down here to get into trouble."

 

"First, tell me how you got to me so quickly."

 

"I was looking for you and the computer told me you had come down looking for Jack. After a little probing, which included the fact that Jack refused to talk to you yesterday, and you had demanded his location when he was on privacy, I figured you might need some help. I just didn't expect to find thugs trying to carry off one of my crew and beat up or kill another."

 

"Sorry, Walter. I didn't want to involve you. It seems so silly now."

 

"Well, silly or not, you are going to tell me. And it had better be good or Jack will be off my ship before you can whistle Dixie."

 

"We've been seeing each other since the night he came on board."

 

"Tell me something I don't know. I'm across the corridor, remember?"

 

"What's that supposed to mean?"

 

Walter's grin should have warned him.

 

"Oh GOD! John! Please, please, John let me come." Walter panted dramatically, as he used his best bedroom voice.

 

"You've heard him?"

 

"Many times. And the way he screams when you finally let him come almost makes me wish I was inclined that way so I could see if you're really that good or he's just easy to please. Of course, I wouldn't have to have sex with you to find out if you are as big as he seems to think you are."

 

John grinned at his Captain then.

 

"Bigger."

 

Walter laughed.

 

They had reached the shuttle and by mutual consent decided they would continue the discussion later. Dr. Mulder met them in the launch bay and checked Jack right there.

 

"They used the heavy stuff. Obviously they intended to have him well away before he woke up. Let's get him to sick bay and I'll flush his system."

 

"Will he be all right, Doctor?"

 

"Captain, he'll be fine, this time."

 

She looked pointedly at John as she spoke. He replied quickly.

 

"There won't be a next time."

 

"There will be if someone doesn't get his head out of his ass."

 

With that she guided the stretcher toward sickbay. John started to follow when a hand gripped his arm.

 

"After we talk, you can go sit with him. Also don't forget to have the doctor check you as well. I imagine you'll be pissing blood tonight."

 

John would have preferred going with Jack, but he knew it would be some time before he was awake. Might as well get the 'talk' over with.

 

Walter led John to his quarters and sat at his desk. John took a seat.

 

"I'm waiting."

 

"You know how I get when I'm on a project. I had been planet side for about thirty hours when he called down. He wanted me to come back to the ship. I said no, rather rudely as I recall. Then he showed up, trying to get me to come back to the ship with him."

 

"How much Stim had you taken?"

 

"Two or three."

 

"Which is it?"

 

"Three."

 

"Had you eaten?"

 

"No."

 

"Fuck, John, *I* don't even like you when you are like that. What did you say to him?"

 

"I basically told him he had no rights and told him to go jerk off."

 

"John, is he just a fuck toy? I thought he might be the one you settled down with."

 

"What? This from Mr. Pleasure Companion? Where do you get off..."

 

"JOHN!"

 

"I'm sorry. I guess it just hit me that he was almost gone for good. I'm not sure what we have but he is definitely more than a fuck toy. Walter, you know how I am. You couldn't live with me and you probably love me as much as anyone ever has. I always fuck it up."

 

"I read his psych profile, John. I think this time you've found one who won't put up with your shit or run away from it."

 

"He moved all his things back to his cabin and he went planet-side."

 

"He wasn't running away, he was giving *you* distance and time to think. If he wanted to run away, he would have put in for transfer while you were still down-planet taking Stim and not eating. I won't say he's in love with you, but he isn't through with you, that's obvious."

 

"Guess I'll find out if you're right when Dana gets all the shit out of his system. Is it ok if I go now? I think the adrenaline is wearing off. I'm starting to feel that punch I took."

 

"Go ahead. Let me know when he's awake."

 

John entered the sickbay and was immediately alarmed. Jack was hooked up to more than a blood recycling machine. There was a ventilator next to the bed as well.

 

"Dana, what's going on?"

 

"He's having a serious reaction to the drug cocktail they gave him. It's a good thing you found him or he would have died. He's going to be fine now. The vent is just for support until we have all of the drugs out of his system."

 

John stood next to the bed and gently gripped the pale hand resting beside Jack's body.

 

"John, I need to examine you."

 

"I'm fine."

 

"Captain's orders. *Now*. Come on he's not going to be awake for some time."

 

John realized it was futile to argue with her. She may have been a small woman but she could make even the Captain obey when she knew she was right. The exam went quickly and she agreed with the Captain that he would likely see some blood in his urine.

 

John was asleep with his head resting on the bed next to Jack's body when he woke up. He was disoriented, wondering how he'd gotten back to the ship and why John was holding his hand as he slept.

 

"John."

 

His voice was a hoarse croak but it was enough to bring Dr. Mulder to the bedside as John's head shot up.

 

"Jack, you're going to be fine. We had a tube down your throat to help you breathe while the drugs were flushed from your system."

 

"Were they yellow?"

 

"Dana, I thought you said he would be fine."

 

"He will be, it's probably just residual dream images."

 

"No."

 

One word then he started to cough. John sat on the bed and pulled Jack against him, holding him steady through the coughing fit. When it stopped, Dana held out a glass of water for him to drink. He swallowed gratefully, letting the cool water soothe his throat.

 

"Not dreaming. I'm allergic to the yellow coloring they use in some medications. Puts me into shock."

 

"I don't remember seeing that in your chart."

 

"Found out planet-side during my last stop with the Cassiopeia. I didn't have the ships physician update my records before I transferred."

 

"I'll do that now. You can go back to your quarters now if you like. I'll come by to check on you in a few hours."

 

"He'll be in my quarters, Dana."

 

"I have my own quarters, thank you."

 

"We need to talk, Jack. Besides I'm sure you should be watched over for a while, right, Dana?"

 

"That might be a good idea. I'll go there to check on you after dinner. John, keep him to soft foods, his stomach will probably be a little delicate for the next couple of days."

 

John took Jack's arm and led him from sickbay. When they were out of earshot of Dana, he spoke.

 

"Jack, I owe you an apology. Let's get to my quarters and I'll deliver it properly."

 

Jack turned to look at him for a long moment, then he nodded and allowed himself to be towed along to the officer's deck. Once inside John's quarters, he was pulled in close and John's mouth covered his. Jack went rigid, keeping his lips firmly together. But John refused to give up; he continued the kiss until Jack shuddered and melted against him. When the kiss ended, Jack's head dropped to his shoulder.

 

"Jack, I treated you terribly. If it's any consolation to you, I've been paid back for it."

 

"What do you mean? Want to tell me what happened? I can't remember anything after some guy asking me if I was single then buying me a drink."

 

"I went down looking for you. That damn computer is so literal, wouldn't put me through to you."

 

"I was on privacy, John. That *is* a crewmember's right on leave."

 

John let him go, motioning for him to sit. He went over to the kitchen area and got them tea, and sat down facing Jack.

 

"Look, I know I was out of line. I told you something and, when you tried to act on it, I blew you off. The Captain has chewed me a new one for that."

 

"I don't want to cause problems for you. I should just go." Jack was suddenly sitting stiffly in the chair, his face closed and remote.

 

"Fuck! I don't want you to go. I'm trying to make things right between us."

 

"I'm listening."

 

"I went to the planet to look for you. I knew I had fucked up pretty badly when I realized the only thing of yours left here was your scent on the pillow."

 

"I thought I was crowding you. Maybe you needed space. And I was pissed at the way you spoke to me down planet."

 

"I don't blame you for being pissed. Maybe I've mentioned that I just need someone to kick my ass now and then."

 

The smile on Jack' s face was quickly hidden behind his teacup.

 

"I had been searching for you for about four hours when I saw that man carting you out of the bar. It didn't take a genius to figure out where he was going with you."

 

"Pleasure house?"

 

"Yeah. I was discussing the situation with him when three of his buddies showed up. So I sent a signal and pulled my weapon on him. I think I said something to him about sending him to hell."

 

"Was I going with him?" Jack voice was low; his eyes more serious than John had ever seem them.

 

"I was hoping for reinforcements before I had to make that decision. Guess it was presumptuous of me to assume you would rather die than be 'trained' the way they train around here."

 

"No, you would have been making the right decision."

 

John reached out then and grasped Jack's hand. Jack allowed his fingers to slip between John's. Planets were allowed to police themselves, but some of the things that were allowed on this one didn't sit well with most members of the fleet. The so-called training of pleasure companions being at the top of the list.

 

"I'm very glad I didn't have to make it. The Captain showed up like the cavalry to save the day. I'm sure he broke the guy's nose."

 

Jack grinned, "Sorry I missed that. I'd love to see our Captain in action."

 

"Wasn't really what you would call action. He warned the guy about messing with his crew then popped him."

 

"Still, I would have liked to have seen him."

 

"Jack, why did you tell that prick you were single?"

 

"What? Did he tell you that?"

 

"Yes."

 

"That's not exactly what I said to him."

 

"What *exactly* did you say?"

 

"It's not important."

 

"No, I think it is. Tell me."

 

John's voice had taken on the tone Jack normally only heard in their bed. Jack pulled his hand away and rose from the chair. He put his cup in the small sink.

 

"I think I should go back to my quarters. I'll be fine alone. Thanks for the rescue."

 

Jack turned toward the door and John's voice rang out.

 

"Computer: privacy; lock the door."

 

Jack stopped when he heard the locking mechanism click. He stood still, head bowed, waiting.

 

John sat looking at the man standing by his door. He was finding this relationship much more difficult than any he'd had in the past. He couldn't treat this man as a fuck toy or just a fuck buddy.

 

He hadn't been completely honest with his Captain earlier. When he saw Jack draped over that asshole's shoulder, his heart had almost stopped. He knew he had been seconds away from losing Jack. And he'd felt like a damn fool for how he had treated him.

 

But right then he had also been feeling a touch of anger. If he had been totally honest with himself, he would have realized he was upset because he considered Jack to be his and he hadn't wanted anyone thinking otherwise.

 

Not even some piece of shit pleasure companion procurer.

 

"I'm sorry, Jack."

 

Jack's head rose and he looked at John. Green eyes stared into blue seeking the truth. What he wanted wasn't there, so he did the only thing he could think to do.

 

"Thank you for that. May I go now?"

 

"Damn it, Jack! What the fuck did you say to him? I *need* to know."

 

Jack's eyes shifted to focus on the wall behind John's head.

 

"I told him the truth."

 

"And what do you consider to be the truth."

 

"I have no contract with anyone."

 

"He seemed to think that meant no one would be looking for you."

 

"I didn't think anyone would be. In all honesty, I went down there looking for a good time."

 

Those words cut through John like a knife. True, they had no contract but they had agreed to be exclusive as long as it was good.

 

And it had been good.

 

Until *he* fucked it up.

 

"Jesus! Jack! He was a procurer!"

 

"I didn't know that. He was polite. He seemed interested in me."

 

"Meaning I'm not?"

 

"When it suits you. But I find I don't want a Master-sub relationship any more. I want something more than that."

 

"You want a contract?" John was shocked at how badly he wanted Jack to say yes. John knew that Jack would live up to a contract if they had one and, for the first time in his life, he wanted a legal, binding contract.

 

"I didn't say that. I want to be treated with respect. The way you spoke to me in front of the crewmembers down planet was rude at best. I've never seen or heard of you treating other crew with such disrespect. And to speak to the man who shares your bed that way..."

 

"You're right. You do deserve better, both as a crewmember and as a lover. You may leave now if you wish, but I hope you'll stay. I'd like a second chance. Please."

 

Jack looked at him for a long moment and John thought he was going to walk out. When he finally spoke, it wasn't what John was expecting.

 

"I'm tired. Will you hold me while I sleep?" Not quite what Jack really wanted but it was all he was prepared to ask for right then.

 

"Yes."

 

Jack began to undress but was stopped when John jumped up to do it for him. He led Jack to his bed and when he was settled, John undressed as well, slipping into the bed next to him. Jack snuggled close, placing his head on John's shoulder, and quickly went to sleep.

 

John, however, didn't sleep. He held Jack; his hands moving over him as they had that first night Jack had slept next to him. His thoughts were a tangle of self-recriminations and fears. Fear of how much Jack had come to mean to him. Fear that he would fuck this up as he had every other personal relationship he had ever tried.

 

The long period without sleep, combined with the aftermath of the events on the planet pulled him under. He slept holding on to Jack until Dana came to check on him.

 

They both woke to the sound of Dana's voice calling to them.

 

"John, Jack, you guys sleeping?"

 

"Come in, Dana."

 

The door opened and Dana entered John's quarters. He was pulling on a robe as she came in. He waved her toward Jack.

 

"Go ahead and check your patient. I'm just going to order dinner."

 

"I gave the Mess a menu for you both. Just tell them you're ready for it."

 

"I can choose my own dinner, thank you."

 

"You spent sixty hours down-planet taking Stim and not eating. You need to make up for some of that."

 

John stomped over to the com panel, cursing Captains who give you up to ship's doctors. Dana grinned at Jack and ignored the tirade.

 

"Jack, how are you feeling? I take it you slept some more."

 

"I'm much better. Had a nice nap."

 

"Good. I've taken you both off the duty roster for the next three days. That's how long I feel you both need to recover from the last few days."

 

She quickly checked Jack's vital signs. Then she stood, smiled down at her patient then moved back into the living area. Taking John's hand, she pulled him out the door into the hallway. She checked quickly to make sure no one was around to overhear their conversation.

 

"John, how important is this boy to you?"

 

"Dana, he's hardly a boy."

 

"Not in years maybe and you know that isn't how I mean it. Do you care about him?"

 

John suddenly found the floor of immense interest. Dana pulled his sleeve sharply. He looked up at her raised eyebrow then quickly glanced around the corridor, making sure they were alone before answering her.

 

"So much it scares me."

 

"Then make sure he knows that today can't be repeated. He could have died, John. Would have if you guys hadn't gotten him back to me so quickly after he was given the drugs. Get in there and if you can't say the words, at least act the Dom and give him an order."

 

Dana turned and headed down the corridor toward her quarters before he could say a word, leaving him standing there, jaw agape with a stunned expression on his face.

 

He hadn't thought she was aware of his Dom proclivities. Was there anything that damn woman didn't know?

 

He shook his head and stepped back into his quarters, but before he could close the door, a Mess steward appeared with their tray.

 

"Jack, do you feel like getting up or should I bring it there?"

 

"Be right out."

 

John set up the table. Heard the bathroom door open.

 

"Something smells good. I'll bet it's your dinner, not mine."

 

"Well, let's see. Menu says you're to have chicken soup, a slice of French bread, and ice cream for dessert. Will that do? I'd share my pasta with you but I wouldn't put it past Dana to have the computer spying on us."

 

"No, she's right. My stomach is a little delicate. I'd better stick with what she ordered for me."

 

John pulled him in for a quick hug and then pushed him down into a chair. They spoke very little during dinner, which wasn't normal for them. John was trying to come up with a way of saying I love you without saying it. Jack was afraid of making whiny demands.

 

Once dinner was over, John pulled Jack to his feet and kissed him. It didn't take long for the kiss to arouse desire. Jack moaned against John's lips. He spoke when they pulled back for air.

 

"I'm sorry I went down there like that. I should have waited, given you time."

 

"No, Jack. Walter already pointed out to me oh so delicately, quote: 'Fuck, John, *I* don't even like you when you're like that' unquote. And he's known me for years. There is no way someone who has only known me a few weeks could understand that it's not personal."

 

"How could that not be personal? When you talk to me like that in front of others?"

 

"You're right. I have no right to treat you that way. I won't promise it won't ever happen again. I'm a fuck up in the relationship department. Always have been. But if I do it again, sic Dana or Walter on me, please. Don't take another chance like today. Dana will kill me if anything happens to you."

 

Jack had singled out the most important word in that little speech...relationship. John considered them to be in a relationship. So if another situation like this arose he would sic Dana or Walter on him. Or else he would make like a caveman and haul John home.

 

"I think I'll ask Dana. She seems to scare you more."

 

John smiled and pulled Jack toward the bed.

 

"May I make love to you?"

 

"Yes." One word, whispered softly.

 

John's hands skilfully stripped Jack of the pants he had slipped on earlier. John's eyes followed the lean curve of Jack's hip as he leaned down to throw the covers aside. John's robe landed in the floor.

 

Jack positioned himself on the bed and held up his arms. John wasted no time in joining him there. Pulling the younger man close, he began to rain kisses on him starting with a long exploration of his mouth. The kisses continued until no spot on Jack's face was left unkissed.

 

Both men were hard by the time John moved down to suck and bite at two pink nipples. Jack's body arched up into the air, straining to make further contact.

 

"Harder!" The single word hissed as Jack's hands held his lover's head closer.

 

John moved lower, finding a cup of a belly button and nipping at the edge before delving inside to taste yet another portion of the man whimpering steadily. Jack's hips twitched, his body trying to direct John to the place it really wanted his attention.

 

John chuckled against Jack's navel, which caused a delightful ripple of muscles as the ticklish flesh tried to retreat.

 

"John, please!"

 

John raised his head to look at the debauched beauty in his bed.

 

"The Captain is right."

 

Jack's eyes opened, "Right about what?"

 

"You are rather noisy in bed."

 

Jack's face flamed, eyes squeezed shut and a low groan was John's answer.

 

Smiling wickedly at his lover, John swooped down and deep-throated Jack's perfect cock. Two hands tangled in John's hair as hips thrust upwards. It didn't take John long to bring Jack off. Even in the short time they had been together, he had learned most of Jack's buttons.

 

He cleaned his lover's cock, making sure he found every last drop, then moved up to pull Jack close, kissing him again. John lay there, content to hold Jack, waiting for him to sleep again. He thought Jack had gone to sleep until he spoke.

 

"I wouldn't be so damn noisy if you weren't such a tease. And the fact that you are so damn good at making me want you doesn't help either."

 

John smiled as he placed a soft kiss against Jack's temple.

 

"Go to sleep, lover. You need to rest."

 

Jack's hand slid down and gripped John's still hard dick.

 

"What about this?"

 

"It can wait. Sleep."

 

"Only if you promise you'll wake me later with this fat thing inside me."

 

John's hand tilted up Jack's face and he kissed him softly.

 

"I promise. You shall have me before you have breakfast in the morning."

 

Jack kissed him once more, then snuggled into his arms and soon slept. John stayed awake for a long time thanking every deity he knew that Jack was safe in his bed.

 

*******

 

The next few months settled into a pleasant routine for John. Jack was good company both in and out of bed. The Captain made teasing comments after the more thunderous evenings. It had become almost a game to see just how loud John could get Jack to beg. And Jack always spent the days after those nights with a dreamy look on his face.

 

During their first two-month liberty together, John had taken Jack home to meet his family. Jack ended up replacing two pillows while they were there. Biting a pillow was the only way he could think of to keep from broadcasting to the household the things John did to him, because John told him flat out that abstinence was not an option.

 

They had spent a month there, then a month with Jack's family. Strangely enough, John had shown some restraint in Jack's mother's house. Not that they didn't have sex, it was just of the vanilla variety, with John swallowing Jack's moans.

 

Returning to the ship for their next tour, John had gone to check in with the Captain and received the surprise of a lifetime. He didn't bother to signal at the door, because he was used to the Captain being available during that hour of the day. The door opened and John stopped dead in his tracks.

 

John's eyes took in every detail. A boy was lying on the Captain's chest, the Captain's hands moving slowly over the boy's back and through his hair. Both men were naked and from the way their clothing was strewn about, John assumed they had stripped hurriedly.

 

The scent of sex was heavy in the air. From the positions of the two men, Doggett rightfully assumed that the boy had just fucked his Captain's ass. His 'straight-I-only-fuck-pleasure-companions-never-get-involved-with-crewmembers', Captain had been butt fucked for the first time in his life.

 

John examined the boy. Noting the slight build, he knew the Captain had not been raped. There was no way that boy could have forced anything on his bear of a Captain, plus the movements of the Captain's hands indicated anything but resistance.

 

"Captain, what's going on?"

 

Walter turned to see the surprise on his First Officer's face, the voice and face bringing him out of the post-coital haze he had been drifting in. He straightened, trying to push the boy off. The boy's plaintiff cry was deeper than John would have expected from one so young.

 

"Walter, please don't do that. You must wait until the seal releases on its own."

 

"What?"

 

"When the men of my planet ejaculate, the head forms a seal to insure the sperm has time to fertilize the eggs. It's an involuntary response. If you keep pulling, you will make the seal last longer, not to mention cause us both more pain."

 

"Doggett, get the physician up here immediately."

 

"Aye, Captain."

 

The First Officer crossed to the communication panel and summoned the doctor to report to the Captain's quarters on the double. Then John worked on keeping a straight face while he waited for her to arrive. When Dana arrived she took one look at the situation and shoved John out the door.

 

He waited in the corridor, fairly sure he knew what had happened to his Captain, but wanting to confirm that with Dana. She wasn't long in exiting the Captain's quarters, a huge grin on her face.

 

"So, Doctor, tell me, what's that all about?"

 

"The Ensign is from New Russia."

 

"Oh shit! That's what I thought. The Captain didn't know?"

 

"Guess not, but it's obvious you do."

 

"My cousin did her apprenticeship there. Her husband scored on the first date. They have three kids and she's carrying again."

 

"Maybe you can convince him that it's a one way ticket. He didn't want to listen to me. He said something that really hurt Alex. I hope you didn't need him for anything important because he'll be there awhile."

 

"Good thing we aren't scheduled to leave for two weeks. That ought give him time to accept the reality."

 

The two wandered off down the hall with Doggett still grinning as Dana tried to keep a straight face. John headed to the Mess to have lunch with Jack and Dana went back to Sickbay. When he reached the Mess, he waved at Jack, got his lunch and joined his lover at the small table in the corner. Since it was late for lunch, the place was pretty deserted.

 

"Short meeting. I didn't expect to see you until later."

 

John grinned, "The Captain is very busy at the moment."

 

"Too busy for his First Officer? What's going on, John? I know that look."

 

"Our Captain has just discovered the joy of gay sex."

 

"What?!" Jack's eyebrows rose toward his hairline.

 

"You heard me. I walked into his cabin to find him spread out on his desk, still sweaty and panting, with a beautiful boy lying between his legs." John's grin got wider if that were possible.

 

"John Doggett, you're lying. Our Captain is so straight you could use him to align walls."

 

John snorted a laugh at the mental image of a construction worker calling out, 'I need to use Krycek to make sure this wall is straight'.

 

"I agree, Walter has always *considered* himself to be straight, but he's going to need to rethink that position. Although I have no doubt he'll fight it."

 

"Wait a minute. You said he was on the bottom and the boy was between his legs. Now I know you're bullshitting me. If Walter Krycek decided to go gay, he would definitely be a top like you."

 

"Walter Krycek has just found himself bonded to a New Russian. I don't think he was in any condition to try and top. He was probably royally fucked before he knew what hit him."

 

John smiled again as Jack's mouth dropped open.

 

"A New Russian? Do you think he knew?"

 

"Wouldn't have mattered. Once the boy saw him and wanted him, it was a done deal. And Walter's keen sense of smell probably made it happen so quickly that the boy didn't have time to tell him anything. He certainly didn't have time to tell him about the seal."

 

"Did he...I mean..."

 

"Yes, and the boy whimpered and told him he needed to stay still. Walter had me call Dana, but of course, she couldn't do anything about it."

 

A low chuckle burst from Jack's lips. His hand slipped under the table to squeeze John's cock suggestively.

 

"Can we eat later?"

 

"What? The mental image of our Captain spread-eagled being fucked make you horny or something."

 

Jack's only answer was to pull John's hand over to cover the hard bulge in his pants.

 

"Come on, bottom boy, I feel the need to plough your hot little ass."

 

John and Jack headed back to their quarters, only to be almost run down by Alex as he charged out of Walter's door. John got a brief glimpse of Walter sitting naked on his desk before the door closed. Jack caught the unbalanced Alex, holding on until he was steady.

 

"Hey, you ok?"

 

"Sorry. I didn't see you."

 

John exchanged looks with Jack. Something had definitely hurt the boy. He was trying unsuccessfully to hide the tears, which sparkled on his lashes.

 

"I'm First Office John Doggett and this is Yeoman Jack Mann. Why don't you come with us until you calm down a little? We're good listeners."

 

"I should go find my quarters. I was just reporting to the Captain."

 

"Alex, I know what happened. I walked in on you, remember?"

 

Alex looked up, then realized whom he had run into. He blushed as he brushed at his tears.

 

Jack put a hand on the boy's arm. "You need time to calm down before you face your new crewmates. Come with us and we'll make you some tea."

 

Alex allowed the two men to lead him to a door across the corridor. He sat when Jack pulled out a chair for him. His head bowed as he fought to get control of his emotions.

 

Jack started the tea as John sat at the table with Alex.

 

"So I take it our Captain made an ass of himself. I knew he wouldn't take it well but I thought he'd at least try to understand before he stuck his foot in his mouth."

 

Alex's head rose to stare at John in surprise.

 

"What? Surprised the First Officer talks that way about his Captain? I've been serving with the man for five years. He isn't just my Captain; he's my friend. And sometimes he's a jackass."

 

"You don't understand."

 

"Yes, Alex, I do. My cousin is married to a New Russian. What you don't understand is you just turned our Captain's world on its ear. He thinks of himself as straight. That's just the first obstacle he needs to get over."

 

"I don't think he wants to get over it."

 

"At this point, it doesn't matter what he wants, does it? It's a matter of what his body needs. What his body will crave. What you can do to and for him."

 

"He hates me. He'll never want to be with me."

 

"How old are you?"

 

"Twenty. What's that got to do with anything?"

 

"At twenty, you still feel things so intensely. You still don't realize that the wheel will turn. Our Captain is thirty-five. He's had a long time to get set in his ways. You just showed him that what he has believed to be true for thirty-five years, isn't. It takes time to realign your thinking."

 

"I thought he was enjoying what we did. He did come."

 

"He enjoyed it, trust me. You didn't see how he looked lying there with you still inside him as he caressed your back."

 

Jack brought over a cup of tea, setting it in front of Alex. John pushed the sugar across the table.

 

"Do you want cream or lemon, Alex?"

 

Alex looked up at the auburn haired man. Seeing nothing but kindness there, he smiled tentatively.

 

"No, thank you, sugar is fine."

 

John pulled Jack down onto his lap, wrapping an arm around him. They waited as the boy stirred sugar into his tea. Finally, he began to talk.

 

"I've been dreaming about the man I would bond with for such a long time. I guess it was foolish to think he would want me instantly. I walked into the cabin and he stood up, so tall and beautiful, and I knew. I couldn't have stopped it, even if I wanted to."

 

Jack reached out a hand and covered Alex's briefly.

 

"Sometimes these macho types just need to be rapped upside their heads before they get the point."

 

"Jack." Doggett's tone held a faint warning.

 

"I'm not saying actually hit him. But you are always saying he is stubborn. This is one time he can't have his way."

 

"No, he can't but it'll be a battle. Alex, the best thing for you to do is to go about your duties and try to be patient. We have two weeks before we leave for him to get used to the idea. Dana and I will both talk to him. She's been telling him for years he should find a mate."

 

"It will be difficult for me. Every time I see him I'll want him."

 

"Just think how difficult it will be for him. Our Captain has a better than normal sense of smell. So, believe me, he will find it difficult to stay away from you."

 

"That's why he reacted so quickly. I barely had time to find out his name before we were…"

 

"I figured that from the way your clothes were scattered every where. Jack, why don't you take Alex and show him where his temporary quarters are, maybe give him a brief tour of the ship. Then I'll see you back here in a couple of hours."

 

Alex looked puzzled, "Temporary quarters?"

 

"Of course, Alex. Once Walter faces reality, you don't think he's going to want to be having to do more than roll over when he wants you, do you?"

 

The blush on Alex's face brought a smile to John's. A man would have to be an utter fool to turn his back on having that boy in his bed. His Captain wasn't a fool, he was just pig headed.

 

Jack kissed John and Alex watched with sorrow, since he had not been kissed goodbye. John waited until Jack had enough time to get Alex out of the corridor before he charged across it to talk to his Captain. Once more, John didn't signal, he just barged in the door. Walter looked around the partition and frowned at him.

 

"I just finished my shower, can this wait?"

 

"No, Walter, it can't."

 

"Is there something wrong with the ship? Crew?"

 

"Walter, the only crewmembers with a problem at the moment are you and our new ensign. You hurt that boy, very badly."

 

"John, this isn't any of your business. I'm not gay. It was a mistake that won't be repeated."

 

"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten! You fucking idiot!"

 

"John, you're insubordinate. Leave now and we'll forget this ever happened."

 

"I won't leave until I say my piece to my *friend*. For years I've watched you keep everyone who might have been a viable partner at arms length. This one you can't do that with."

 

"I'm not sure what happened but it will not happen again. You may be gay, half the damn ship may be gay, but *I'm* not. The boy will get over it. He's young, far too young for me. Don't you and Jack know someone nice you can fix him up with?"

 

"Walter, that won't work. He's from New Russia."

 

"So what?"

 

"Are you going to stand there and tell me he didn't fuck you up the ass? That he didn't come in you?"

 

John had phrased his questions in as coarse a manner as possible. Walter needed to face up to the realities of the situation. He may not have been 'gay' but that was a moot point now.

 

"I don't like your tone, John. Get out of here."

 

"My tone is the least important aspect of this conversation. You are bonded to that boy, like it or not. You will never have sex again except with him. You are the only man he will ever make love to. And make no mistake; he was making love to you. No matter what words we use to describe it, that is what happened in this room a short while ago."

 

"Sounds like witchcraft. How can his sperm change me? If I wanted a relationship, I would have had one long ago."

 

"Walter, the chemistry is real. My cousin is married to a New Russian. The first time he saw her, he wanted her and she had no more choice than you do. Don't deprive yourself and this boy of a single minute of happiness just because it doesn't fit your world view."

 

"John, I told you this is none of your business. I don't want this and that's all there is to it. He'll get over his crush in time. I'll arrange to have him transferred."

 

John stood for a long moment staring at the bull-headed man in front of him. Knowing he was getting nowhere, he turned on his heel and left the Captain to his illusions.

 

John's next stop was Sickbay.

 

"Doctor, I need to talk to you privately."

 

Dana nodded and led John to her private office. She sat at her desk and waited for him to begin.

 

"You need to inform Fleet Command that bonding has taken place between the Captain and Alex."

 

"I have already added it to my log, John. That'll be transmitted before we leave."

 

"No, you need to do it now. The stubborn fool is planning to have the boy transferred."

 

"What? He can't do that. The bond needs to be completed. Since you know about New Russians, you know they can't be apart for very long until the bond is totally cemented. Did you talk to him?"

 

"I tried. Asshole wouldn't listen. Just kept telling me he isn't gay. Wanted Jack and me to set Alex up. Sometimes that man gives me a sharp pain."

 

Dana giggled as she pictured exactly where he got that pain. Turning to her computer terminal, she spoke.

 

"Computer, contact Fleet Command records division for me, please."

 

"Yes, Doctor."

 

"Records, Johnson."

 

"Hi, Debra. It's Dana Mulder."

 

"Dana, how's it going?"

 

"Not bad. Getting ready to go out again."

 

"Safe journey. Do you need something?"

 

"Yes, I need to file a record of a new bonding. I need it to go in right away."

 

"Before your normal pre-flight download?"

 

"Yes, my Captain is about to make a mistake."

 

"The great and powerful Krycek? A mistake? Say it ain't so."

 

Dana looked up at Doggett and winked.

 

"Well, he *is* just a man. You know how they get."

 

"Yeah, I'm married to two of them remember? What do you need recorded."

 

"As of 13:50 today, Captain Walter Krycek and Ensign Alex Skinner became bond mates. Ensign Skinner is New Russian, making this a permanent bond."

 

The bark of laughter from the other end brought a smile to Dana's face.

 

"No shit? Mr. Straight planning on trying to transfer him?"

 

"You got it. That's exactly what he's planning."

 

"Well then, I guess I better make sure this gets into the assignment computer right away. Anyone taking bets yet on how long it will take him to come around?"

 

"Not yet but I'll be sure and let you know when they do."

 

"I'll go take care of this right now. Be sure and let me know how it goes. Should have recorded that. You could have made a fortune."

 

John shoved his hand in his mouth to keep from giving his presence away. Dana said her goodbyes and signed off.

 

"Well, that'll keep Alex here where he belongs. Now I guess we wait."

 

When John got back to his quarters he found Jack waiting for him.

 

"How's the boy doing?"

 

"He's understandably upset. He had this fantasy built in his mind of what his relationship was going to be and instead he gets this macho 'I'm not gay' bond mate. He was all wrung out and tired from his first real sexual experience and the emotions of it all. I made him lie down and stayed until he fell asleep. How'd it go with Walter?"

 

"Bad. So badly that I had Dana update records with the bonding."

 

"He was going to have Alex transferred?"

 

"Yeah. He wanted us to 'fix' Alex up with someone. After I explained that it wasn't possible he got that pig-headed look on his face and said he would transfer him. So I went straight to Dana. She had someone she knows in records put the info in and notify assignments as well."

 

"He's going to be pissed at you two when he finds out."

 

"Sometimes you have to do what's best for your Captain. He'll get over it."

 

Jack was right about Walter being pissed. The explosion that came when he found out he had been out flanked by his First Officer and the ship's Doctor rivalled that of any bomb ever dropped during a war. Jack was in John's quarters when John and Dana went to face the Captain.

 

Jack had never seen the Captain angry, and after hearing the way he dressed down John and Dana, he hoped he never did again. Every word was clearly heard by everyone on the tier. John told him later that after Walter wound down he told them both he would've had them transferred if he didn't know that half his crew would ask for reassignment if they left.

 

Walter was stubborn, but he knew that Dana was the best doctor in the fleet. Another First Officer would never duplicate John's almost psychic reactions with him in times of danger.

 

They watched as he continued to deny the bond. Until the day Dana and John forced him to see what he was doing to Alex. Jack had fussed over the boy, attempting to offer moral support but it wasn't much help when his entire physical well being hinged on his mate.

 

Once Walter saw how ill the boy was, he finally clued in. Over the next couple of months John and Jack watched as the relationship bloomed. The crew got used to the woodsy smell of Alex's that signalled the arrival of the Captain. They learned to dodge their Captain if he was seen running in the corridors.

 

The Captain's relationship had produced an unexpected turn to their relationship. John came back from a shopping trip with the Captain and proposed.

 

"What's all this John?"

 

"It's a special night. Go shower, I'll have dinner ready when you come out."

 

Jack had gone to shower wondering what was going on. When he came out, John had candles lit and the table covered with all his favorite foods.

 

He took a seat when John motioned to it, accepted a glass of wine and waited.

 

"To starting a new life."

 

Jack drank the toast but gave John a curious look. A small box appeared on the table in front of him.

 

"John?" Jack's voice trembled.

 

"Open it."

 

Jack picked up the box with shaking hands. Opening it carefully, he gasped when he saw the contents. John had been born and reared on Earth, but his mother was from a planet that had not only changed humans but had intermingled their genes with the indigenous race. Jack knew that but hadn't expected that John would use their culture for a marriage contract.

 

"John, are you sure about this?"

 

"I'm very sure. I've never had a contract, not even short term. My mother's people believe in a perfect mate. She said she knew my father was hers when they met. Walter and Alex made me think about that again."

 

"We aren't locked together as they are."

 

"No, but I've never felt about anyone the way I feel about you. I was going to ask for a short term contract with options."

 

"What made you change your mind?"

 

"I don't want you to get away."

 

"John, please don't be flip."

 

"I'm sorry. The truth is I want this to be forever. I figure the best way to let you know just how much you mean to me is to make a complete commitment to you. How long are you going to make me wait for an answer?"

 

"I didn't answer?"

 

"I have a paddle." John growled at him.

 

Jack placed the box down on the table and standing, wrapped his arms around John. They kissed; Jack grinding into John. When he finally pulled back, he looked into blue eyes. "I would be honored to be your husband, John Doggett."

 

"Should we register the contract now."

 

"Damn right, before you change your mind."

 

"I won't do that."

 

Jack turned his head, "Computer."

 

"Yes, Yeoman Mann."

 

"Please record the permanent marriage contract of Yeoman Jack Mann and First Officer John Doggett."

 

"First Officer Doggett, please confirm this contract."

 

"Computer, First Officer John Doggett confirms the permanent marriage contract between Yeoman Mann and myself. Please make note that this contract is made in the form of my mother's home planet Lupus."

 

"Congratulations, First Officer Doggett and Yeoman Mann. May your union be long and happy. Should I include this information in the Captain's morning briefing?"

 

"Thank you for the good wishes, Computer. I will tell the Captain about the contract myself."

 

"Very well, First Officer Doggett."

 

"Please give us privacy mode."

 

"Yes, Sir."

 

Jack watched as John picked up the largest of the union bands from the box on the table. Jack pulled his shirt off and presented his arm. John slipped the band up his arm and when it was in place around his bicep John spoke.

 

"This band represents the union of our arms, to hold each other in times of desire, pain, or comfort."

 

Jack's eyes were very bright as he watched the next band being lifted from the box. This one had a hidden hinge. John opened it and placed it around Jack's throat and locked it in place.

 

"This band represents the union of our throats, the part of our bodies that carry the precious blood to our brains, so that we may find the words of love for our voices to utter."

 

Picking up the last band, he took Jack's hand, slipped the ring onto his finger and then kissed it. A single tear traced down Jack's cheek. John caught it on his finger.

 

"This band represents the union of our hands, that we will use to guide each other, to touch each other, to give pleasure or pain, but mostly to lift each other up when needed."

 

Soon Jack had adorned John with the remaining bands in the box and the two men shared a long kiss. They fed each other the meal John had ordered and then spent hours making love.

 

******

 

John strutted onto the bridge the next morning, after leaving his exhausted husband in their bed. The Captain turned to look at his first officer and Krycek's normally surly face lit up with a grin. John smiled back at him before taking his seat.

 

"First Officer, is there something you wish to share with us this morning?"

 

His question caused the others on the bridge to turn toward him. "I feel the Captain already knows the news."

 

"He's loud, John."

 

"Yes, he is rather noisy. Jack and I registered a permanent marriage contract last night." John held his hand up so that his ring sparkled in the bright lights of the bridge.

 

"Congratulations, John. Next leave, Alex and I will take you out to celebrate."

 

"We'd enjoy that, Captain."

 

"Computer, please add the information concerning John's contract to the next transmission to command."

 

"Yes, Captain."

 

"Now shall we get down to business?"

 

"Of course, Sir."

 

"Captain, transmission coming in from the planet."

 

"Very well, put it on."

 

"Captain Krycek, how nice to see you again."

 

"And you as well, Councilor. We have the supplies you requested. I'll have them sent down right away for you."

 

"Thank you, Captain. May I offer you an evening's entertainment?"

 

Walter frowned at the question; the last time he'd been to Peiking City; Alex had not been part of his life. He knew well the type of entertainment the Councilor had in mind. He also knew he wouldn't be able to partake of said entertainment. The problem was, the Councilor might see that as an insult. But being the straightforward man he was he told the truth.

 

"I appreciate the offer, Councilor, but things are different than the last time we visited."

 

"Are you turning down my offer, Captain?"

 

"I would never wish to offend you, Sir. When I speak of things changing I refer to the fact that since last we met I have found a mate."

 

"Why, Captain, I thought you were the carefree, never going to settle down type."

 

"My mate is from New Russia."

 

"Ah, that explains everything. Well, we would certainly enjoy meeting the lady."

 

"My mate is male, Councilor Gray."

 

"Oh."

 

John rolled his eyes at the tone in the Councilor's voice. Walter didn't need to hear that type of thing when a part of him was still dealing with the relationship. The silence stretched out.

 

Finally, Walter spoke. "Councilor Gray, I really have things that I must attend to perhaps on our next visit we can have dinner together."

 

"Excellent, Captain. When will the supplies be sent down?"

 

"First Officer Doggett will be down soon. If you have no objection I will allow some of my crew members leave."

 

"Certainly, Captain Krycek, our merchants always appreciate the business."

 

"Krycek out."

 

Communication was cut and the door hissed open, revealing Alex. "Walter, are you okay?"

 

John grinned as Alex hurried across to his mate.

 

"Everything is fine, Alex. Would you like to go down to the planet with John and Jack to make the delivery? It would give you a chance to see another planet, do some shopping if you wish."

 

Alex touched Walter's shoulder and he received a smile as the tension drained from Walter's body. Walter inhaled deeply, pulling the scent of his lover into his lungs. The bridge crew watched as their Captain and his mate communicated silently.

 

"So can I pick up anything for you while we're down there?"

 

"Bring back some of the fresh fruit they sell in the market."

 

"Okay. Ready, John?" Alex asked.

 

The trip down was uneventful. The three men enjoyed some conversation, specifically about the new nature of Jack and John's relationship. Alex was very happy for them, teasing a bit about the noise level even though he'd been on duty during the loudest part of the evening.

 

After the Councilor's reaction earlier, John took a certain perverse pleasure in introducing him to Alex. They had been shown into the library of the Councilor's mansion and asked to wait.

 

"John, why was Walter upset earlier?"

 

"I'll tell you about it later." John saw Councilor Gray coming down the hallway toward them.

 

"First Officer Doggett, it's a pleasure to see you again."

 

"Councilor Gray." John held out his hand for a handshake. "This is Yeoman Mann and Ensign Skinner."

 

"Pleasure, gentlemen. First time visiting us?" the Councilor shook hands with each of the men.

 

"Yeoman Mann hasn't been here before and this is Ensign Skinner's first voyage; he just finished the academy a few months ago. He's from New Russia. The Ensign is the Captain's mate and Jack is my husband."

 

John watched as the Councilor's eyes narrowed, as he made a surreptitious gesture to wipe off his hand. Homophobia was alive and well in the Councilor's house. The attitude angered John.

 

"How nice." The Councilor's voice had turned cold. "Is the cargo being off loaded?"

 

"Yes, Sir. The Captain gave me strict orders to deliver the smaller package to you personally." John indicated the box that Jack and Alex had brought in.

 

"Well, thank you. I'm sure you men want to get back or perhaps do some sightseeing, so I won't keep you."

 

"Thank you, Sir."

 

They made it out of the house before John cursed. "Asshole!"

 

"He's the reason Walter was upset earlier, wasn't he?" Alex asked.

 

"Yeah. He invited Walter for an evenings entertainment, but backed off on the invitation when he found out you're male."

 

"Oh."

 

"Alex, it's just as well. Walter was uncomfortable with the Councilor's definition of entertainment."

 

"What does that mean?"

 

"The people of this planet have a higher than normal incidence of defective births so they encourage their women to get pregnant by off worlders."

 

"Walter wouldn't want to be used that way."

 

"Exactly. Now forget all that and we'll go have a good time."

 

The three men wandered through the market place, John and Jack watching Alex's delight with exploring the new culture. He purchased a trinket that he told them his mother would love. They watched as he found a small figurine that he thought would look good on Walter's desk. They stowed those away in the shuttle along with the fruit Alex had purchased.

 

John took the shuttle back up and left Jack and Alex to wander some more, a move he would regret before the day was over. Before he returned they had disappeared.

 

Jack and Alex had gotten turned around while wandering through town, and as the time to meet John came closer they moved with purpose in the direction they thought led back to the landing pads. As they passed a tall man, Alex decided to ask for directions.

 

Excuse me, sir, can you tell me if we're headed back to the air field?"

 

"You need to back track a bit. Take the third street down, turn left."

 

"Thank you."

 

They turned back the way that they had come. The man they had talked to got on his communicator and spoke hurriedly.

 

"Got two prospects headed your way, the girls ought to like them, they're good looking."

 

"Got it."

 

"See you later." He walked off to join the men picking up supplies.

 

Jack and Alex walked along with an easy gait, sure they were on the right track finally. When the two men stepped in front of them, they didn't worry, not until the weapons appeared.

 

"Hello, gentlemen. We'd like you to come with us."

 

Jack gave them a sardonic grin, hoping to defuse the situation. "I'm sorry but we're due back on the ship. Our Captain takes a dim view of tardiness."

 

"I don't think you get the point. These," He waved his gun, "mean you're going to do what we want."

 

As Alex tried to back up, he felt the gun press into his back. They both realized it was best to go along for the time being and went with the men. They were soon pushed into the back of a vehicle and then tied up.

 

The trip was completed in silence. Alex and Jack were hustled into a small house, stripped and tied to two beds. A woman entered, smiled down at them and injected them both.

 

"That'll take about an hour to work, then we'll start sending the girls in."

 

"Girls? What are you talking about?"

 

"We need new blood. You two should make good babies."

 

"But I can't. I'm New Russian, I have a mate."

 

"We don't care if you have a mate, we just want you to get a few of the girls pregnant. Then we'll drop you back off in town."

 

"He can't perform with anyone except his mate. I have a husband. You folks sure picked the wrong guys. We won't help you with this."

 

"The drug won't give you any choice."

 

She left the room and the two of them stared at each other.

 

"John will be looking for us already. The Captain will come down to help. It won't take them long to find us."

 

"We're too far from the port, Walter won't be able to smell me."

 

"The two of them are a formidable team, Alex. They'll find us."

 

*******

 

Walter turned to Councilor Gray, his fury barely contained. "Do not say that to me again, Sir! I do not wish to cause an interplanetary incident, but know that I will. We do not leave crew behind!"

 

"Captain, calm yourself. My men are still searching, but if they were taken by the hill people there is little I can do."

 

"There's something I can do."

 

Walter spun around and strode rapidly from the room. Doggett followed, glad that his Captain had given up on diplomacy. Of course, he didn't have much of a choice; he needed his mate on a level most humans never knew.

 

When they reached the shuttle, Walter quickly issued his orders. "No one is to go anywhere alone, and no one is to go unarmed. Offer currency for information. Hell, offer your damn sperm if they want that but get me some information and get it fast."

 

The men moved off in pairs, heading into the surrounding area. Doggett placed a hand on Walter's shoulder. "You can't smell him can you?"

 

"No, and that scares the hell out of me. I've had his scent in my nose for months now. I'd forgotten what the world smelled like without him."

 

"We'll find them, Walter. We have to."

 

"Yeah. Let's go check out these hills the Councilor spoke of."

 

"Should we take a couple of men with us?"

 

"No, we can move quicker and quieter if it's just us."

 

"Okay, just let me get another weapon."

 

Walter gave Doggett a predatory grin as he indicated the extra weapons he had hidden on his person. In short order the two moved out toward the hills that surrounded the town. They worked in an efficient pattern, stopping briefly at noon to eat a quick meal of survival rations, then they were back on the move.

 

It was beginning to get dark when Walter stumbled. John reached for his arm and watched as Walter's eyes closed and he turned slowly. Doggett didn't have to ask; he knew that Walter had the scent. Suddenly, Walter began to run and Doggett was hard pressed to keep up. He was grateful when Walter stopped and pulled him down.

 

The small village was busy with evening activity. Children ran and played, women cooked over fires in the open, and Walter watched as a man opened the door of one of the houses. "Angel, it’s your turn. This red headed guy should give you a healthy baby."

 

"But I like the one with the green eyes."

 

"There's something wrong with him, he can't get it up."

 

Walter's fists clenched and he let out a low growl. Doggett reached out and put a hand on Walter's arm. The girl crossed toward the house and Walter gripped Doggett's arm in response.

 

Putting his lips near John's ear, Walter spoke softly. "We'll circle around the side and see if there is another entrance to the house. We may be able to get them out while this group is eating."

 

"You don’t want to call in the men?"

 

"I don't want to wait for them to get here."

 

John nodded and followed his Captain quietly. There was no back door but there was a window. They peered inside and saw Angel riding on Jack. The horror and pain on his face almost drove Doggett to do something rash. Only his training and the presence of his Captain kept him still.

 

Alex was tied to another bed and seemed to be unconscious. As much as that enraged Walter, he knew that he had to wait. The drug they had used on Jack allowed him to come quickly and Angel left the house soon after it was over.

 

The window creaked as they forced it open, but the noise was too low to attract the people laughing and talking over dinner. Once inside the room, Walter went directly to Alex as John untied Jack, while shushing him. Jack clung to his husband as Walter tried to rouse Alex.

 

"They got mad because Alex couldn't get it up even with the drugs. They hit him in the head."

 

"We're going to get you out of here. Do you think you can walk if I help you?"

 

"I'll do whatever it takes to get out of here."

 

John located Jack's clothes and helped him dress as Walter gathered Alex up. John crawled out of the window first, Jack followed and they took Alex as Walter passed him through. Once Walter was out, he took his mate back and led the way away from the village.

 

When he felt he was far enough away for them to be relatively safe, he hit the panic button. In less than thirty minutes a shuttle landed and they were on their way to the ship. Jack had kept it together until then. He bawled like a child in John's arms all the way back to the ship.

 

Walter watched John as he offered Jack comfort. Walter sat holding Alex, wishing he could break down. But he couldn't do that; Captains aren't allowed. Alex was warm in his arms and his scent was the one Walter was used to breathing when the boy was asleep.

 

Only Alex wasn't asleep, he was unconscious. When the shuttle docked, the med team swarmed into it and Jack waved Dana toward Alex.

 

"Help Alex, Doctor. They hit him on the head and he's been out ever since."

 

"How long has he been out?"

 

"Hours. Captain, I'm sorry I couldn't protect him."

 

"When he's better, you both take a refresher in hand to hand. Get to the infirmary so they can get you checked out. John, go and take care of him."

 

Dana looked up at her Captain, noting the clench of his jaw; she knew that someone was going to pay for what had happened to Alex and Jack. She pitied the entire planet if Alex died. Walter would destroy it and then turn himself in for execution. Without Alex, execution would be a kindness.

 

Dana's training took over; she checked Alex's vitals, peeled back his eyelid and knew she needed to get him to sickbay quickly or she'd lose him.

 

"Walter, we need to hurry. He's in bad shape."

 

He nodded and rose to his feet, pushing past the crewmen and heading for the infirmary. Everyone cleared out of his way as he moved with purpose. Dana ran behind him. As Walter put Alex down, she immediately began to pull over the equipment she would need.

 

"Walter, I want you out of here."

 

"No."

 

"Walter, I need you calm."

 

"I'm calm."

 

"You won't be if you watch what I need to do."

 

"I won't leave him."

 

"I just want you out of the room until I finish this. It won't take long and then you can come back in."

 

"What do you need to do?"

 

"There's bleeding in his brain. I need to relieve the pressure and repair the damage."

 

"Do it."

 

Dana shook her head as he moved to stand at the end of the exam table. She sighed heavily before turning to one of the nurses.

 

"Get him prepped."

 

She moved to the other table where Jack was lying. Checking his vitals, she ordered blood work to determine what drugs he'd been given. He grabbed her hand as she started to move back to Alex.

 

"Doctor, please don't let him die."

 

"I have no intension of letting my Captain's mate die. Try to relax."

 

She hurried back to the table Alex was lying on. Walter wrapped his big hands around the feet of his lover, making contact while staying as much out of the way as possible. He was silent as Dana drilled a small hole in Alex's head.

 

Blood ran out of the hole and she applied suction. When she felt she'd cleared the field she inserted the small micro camera laser Walter watched the screen as she broke up a clot and repaired a vessel. A little more suction and she put a derma weave over the small hole she'd made.

 

She looked up at her Captain. She'd never seen him so pale. He met her eyes and she saw the fear in his. She moved to him, placing her hand over his where it rested on Alex's foot.

 

"He's going to be okay. He wouldn't dare leave you. He knows you'd punish him in your next life."

 

"I don't believe that crap."

 

"Doesn't matter, he does."

 

"How long before we know?"

 

"The pressure has been relieved. He should come around within shortly, unless they drugged him as well. We'll know soon. I'm going back to check Jack now."

 

He nodded and turned enough to see John hovering over Jack. Damn! They'd barely registered their marriage contract and this had happened. He watched as Dana checked the test results and then gave Jack an injection.

 

Walking around the bed, Walter took Alex's hand, raised it to his lips, kissed it and then just held on. He didn't move for the entire time Alex was unconscious. He felt the change in the boy's body, smelled the change in his scent as Alex climbed toward consciousness.

 

Eyes fluttered and then opened. Walter pulled in a deep breath and bent to brush a kiss over a soft forehead.

 

"Walter, what's going on?"

 

"You don't remember?"

 

"I was with Jack. We had a drink in a bar. I don’t really remember anything after that."

 

"I'll have to speak to Jack about leading you astray, you shouldn't be drinking."

 

"Walter, don't pick on Jack, he's my best friend."

 

Dana bustled over to them when she heard the conversation. She checked his vitals.

 

"Do you want to go back to your quarters, Alex? I think you'll be more comfortable there."

 

"I would rather be in my own bed. But first I want to know what happened."

 

"Dana, are you sure about this? I don't want to take any chances."

 

"I wouldn't say it if I wasn't, Captain. Alex, Walter can explain what happened."

 

Walter picked up his lover and started out of the room, but Alex spoke softly. "Let me see Jack before we go, please."

 

Walter stopped by the bed Jack was still lying on. Alex smiled down at him.

 

"You okay?"

 

"Dana is just making sure all the drugs are out of my system, with my history she isn't taking any chances."

 

"Then we'll see you later?"

 

"Yeah, go get some rest."

 

Walter looked down at Jack. "You should get some rest too. You and John are relieved of duty for the next two days at least, longer if Dana says so. I'm going to get this one settled, then I have some business to take care of."

 

John watched as Walter left the infirmary with Alex. He and Dana exchanged looks and Jack asked, "What?"

 

"I have the feeling that this planet is about to be quarantined."

 

Dana laughed, "You mean if he doesn't shoot holes in it first."

 

"Alex is alive, he'll settle for the slow torture of stopping all trade with them for the maximum period followed with strict limits on who is allowed on planet."

 

"Females only?"

 

"I'm thinking non-humanoids."

 

They shared a laugh. Jack still looked puzzled. "He'd go that far you think?"

 

"They not only messed with his crew, they nearly killed his mate. If Alex had died, that village would be a smoking ruin right now."

 

*******

 

Walter ignored the looks as he carried his sheet-wrapped lover to their quarters. He placed him carefully on the bed and then curled around him, holding him tenderly. He talked softly, telling Alex about the events on the planet until Alex fell asleep. Then he rose and went to the bridge.

 

Walter's message detailed the events of the last two days, adding Dana's medical reports that listed the injuries to both the crewmembers, and Jack's verbal account of the events. He sent it, along with his recommendation. He waited for the return transmission, pacing back and forth on the bridge. When it came, he began making plans for the execution of the sanctioned punishment.

 

Shuttles deployed to the planet; armed personnel entered the communications facilities and the control tower for the spaceport. Once they had taken control there, Walter opened a planet-wide communication channel.

 

"This is Captain Walter Krycek. As of zero nine hundred hours local time this planet is under official sanction. All ships are ordered to lift off on a schedule to be given to you by Lt. Commander Mason. Any ship not complying will be locked down and the crew arrested. Crew recall is now sounded, if you don't wish to be left behind you had better head for the spaceport."

 

He had just cut transmission when an urgent query came from the planet.

 

"Captain, the Councilor wishes to speak with you."

 

"Put him on."

 

"Captain, what is going on here? I know you got your men back. I understood that they are alright."

 

"One is still having the drugs cleared from his system. The other required surgery. High command takes a dim view of crewmembers being kidnapped, drugged, raped and injured."

 

"Jealousy is fueling this isn't it? How can you call it rape? Men enjoy sex."

 

"What I witnessed when we found them in no way resembled enjoyment. And Ensign Skinner is a New Russian. He is mated and therefore unable to enjoy sex with anyone other than his mate. Even had they been two other members of my crew, the decision would have been the same."

 

"Captain, you are taking this too far. At least let the ships unload before you force them to leave."

 

"Councilor Gray, this discussion is at a close. I will be down soon to supervise the testing of the women involved in the rape of my yeoman, as well as to give you confirmation of the provisions of the sanction."

 

The communications officer cut the transmission at a hand signal from the Captain.

 

*******

 

Jack was lying in John's arms when the communicator came on.

 

"John, sorry to interrupt."

 

"We're just resting, Walter."

 

"I need to ask Jack a question."

 

"Yes, Captain?"

 

"The women who attacked you will be tested. I have the power to order any fetuses aborted. I won't do that unless you wish it. You may also consider the alternative."

 

"What is that, Captain?"

 

"Allow the babes to be carried to term, and then have them taken back to Earth to be raised there."

 

"May I have some time to talk to John about it?"

 

"Yes, I've finished filing my report with Command over the incident. I'll be going down to the planet soon to tell the Councilor in person."

 

"When are you going down there?"

 

"In an hour."

 

"I'll have your answer by then, Captain." The communicator cut off with a click.

 

"John?"

 

"It's your decision, Jack. I'm not ready to leave the service. Can you allow your children to be reared by others? Or be a part time husband so soon after we've married?"

 

"I was looking for some help here."

 

"I can't decide this for you. You are the one who was forced to provide your DNA. Will you be able to put that out of your mind? Could you rear them and not see their mothers and the men who kidnapped you and hurt Alex so badly?"

 

"I don't think I want them raised here."

 

"Well that's part of your answer."

 

"Those girls are victims as well, John."

 

"Yes, but that doesn't make what they did acceptable."

 

"You're right. Let's get dressed; I want to go down with the Captain. Alex might want to as well."

 

"Walter won't be pleased with that."

 

"You'll protect me."

 

They dressed and then went to see if Alex wanted to go with them. He was just coming out of the shower when they knocked on the door.

 

"Come in." Alex called out as he pulled his pants up over his hips.

 

"Alex, we came to see if you want to go down planet with us." Jack told him.

 

"What's going on?"

 

"Walter is going down to deliver personally the news to the Councilor that the planet is being quarantined."

 

"He's taking it that far?"

 

"If you'd known him longer, you'd know that he doesn't put up with this type of crap. He's never taken it this far before, but then we've never had crew kidnapped and raped and then have the local authorities refuse to help with the situation. The closest we've been to this was when Jack was almost taken by a procurer of pleasure companions."

 

"I'm beginning to think the entire universe sees me as a sex object." Jack interjected.

 

"You belong to me, and I don't share." The steel in John's voice ended the playful look on Jack's face.

 

"I'm sorry, John."

 

John looked at Jack and saw the shame in his face. Instantly contrite, John pulled Jack into his arms and Alex moved forward to put his hand on Jack's shoulder in support. John knew Jack was joking about the situation to avoid looking at how he really felt about it. Holding tightly to Jack, John whispered into his ear.

 

"You have no reason to be sorry. You were the victim. I shouldn't have left the two of you alone down there. I know the area and you've never been here before. That's a mistake I won't make again."

 

"I'm okay, John."

 

Jack pulled back a bit and smiled at his husband. "Alex, get dressed or Walter will be gone. We don't want to miss this chance to see the Krycek temper."

 

They waited until Alex was dressed and then the three of them headed for the shuttle bay. When Walter entered the area a little later, he stopped dead when he saw the three of them waiting for him.

 

"What are you doing out of bed, Alex?"

 

"I'm going with you."

 

"You just had surgery, you should be resting. And John I'm surprised that you're willing to let Jack wander around so soon after what he's been through."

 

"Walter," Alex moved into Walter personal space and slipped his arm around the slim waist, "it will help us heal to see you kick ass."

 

"I'm not going to kick ass."

 

"Bullshit!"

 

"John…"

 

Alex looked up and practically batted his eyelashes as he pouted. Walter was lost as the scent ratcheted up a notch. It was either let Alex have his way or end up going at it on the floor. He'd learned that early on in the relationship. He'd even realized by that point he didn't really mind being manipulated, since the boy used his power so infrequently.

 

"Stop! Get in the shuttle."

 

Walter allowed Alex to snuggle up to him on the way down; after all, it was just the four of them. When they landed, Walter checked with the leader of the security team.

 

"Mason, how's it going?"

 

"Crewmembers are coming in quickly. I gave one of the smaller freighters permission to take off in fifteen minutes, their entire crew had returned, so I saw no reason to delay them."

 

"Anyone we know?"

 

"Captain Tam."

 

"Ah, wish I'd known. Alex would have enjoyed meeting him. Send him my regards and tell him I hope to see him soon."

 

"Aye, Captain."

 

They headed toward the Counselor's office. The locals stepped aside as the Captain strode through the streets. His height alone made him stand out; plus his uniform and the grim expression on his face made most people want to get out of his way.

 

The assistant took one look at Walter Krycek in all his glory and immediately jumped up to announce him. "Councilor, Captain Krycek and associates are here." Then he beat a hasty retreat.

 

"Captain, this is outrageous. I can't believe your superiors have sanctioned this. I've sent off my own message to them and I'm sure they'll straighten this all out. I mean look at them; they're fine."

 

Walter's fists clenched and Alex moved forward to touch him. His mate's presence was probably the only reason Councilor Gray didn't end up sitting on his ass on the floor.

 

"If you take a closer look you'll see the hole that our ship's physician had to drill into his head to relieve the pressure. Like it or not, high command takes a dim view of attacks of any sort on our crews. Now let's get to the point. Here are the sanctions that are being imposed on your planet."

 

Walter handed the official copy to Councilor Gray. They watched, as he turned pale when he read the terms.

 

"Five years with no ships allowed to land here. No humanoids allowed for another thirty after that. Captain, you might as well drop a bomb on us. You know the issues we face."

 

"Those issues should make you want to keep things going smoothly. You should police your people better and make sure that off-worlders don't get kidnapped."

 

"Please, Captain, I'm begging you, don't do this to us."

 

"Councilor, you may make an appeal through the normal channels. I don't expect the decision will be overturned. It is, of course, possible that unscrupulous captains may decide to do business with you, but no ship of the fleet will dock here. Understand this as well, had either Jack or Alex died, this planet would be a smoking cinder as soon as the last ship broke atmo."

 

"You wouldn't dare." The councilor's face had gotten very pale.

 

"I dare a great deal, Gray. Alex is my mate; he's New Russian, and without him my life is over. How would you react in that situation?"

 

"I can't believe that your superiors would allow you that much authority. Surely your first officer would have to step in if that happened."

 

John moved forward at that point, "Mutiny? No, I wouldn't question my Captain. You don't understand about the crew of a ship like the Sirius, captained by a man like Walter Krycek. My Captain has my complete loyalty. You also need to understand that when he says without Alex his life would be over, he means that, literally. You're lucky he didn't just blow up your planet and seek permission after the fact."

 

"Please don't do this to us. We can't survive without off-planet interaction."

 

"It's done. Now, we have a village to visit and tests to give."

 

Walter grabbed Alex's hand and pulled him from the room, Jack and John following. He didn't say anything more until they were on their way to the village. Looking at Jack, he spoke.

 

"I need your decision before we reach the village, Jack."

 

"I don't want the children aborted if they are normal. I don't blame the girls. They did as they were told, especially the one named Mandy; that poor girl was terrified and her father watched, the sick bastard."

 

"If you point him out to me, I'll kick his ass." John told him.

 

"He'd probably hurt her once we're gone, John." Walter rumbled.

 

"Maybe we could take her back to Earth, Captain?"

 

John swung around to look at his lover. "John, she reminded me of my cousin. She cried the whole time, and he cursed her and hit her as soon as it was over."

 

"You want to take her back and we'll be a part of the baby's life?"

 

"Yes, can you live with that?"

 

"Daddy John? I can live with that."

 

"Well, that takes care of one of the women, Jack. What about the others?"

 

"Can I wait until Dana has the tests results?"

 

"Alright, but I'll expect an answer quickly once she has them."

 

They reached the village to find the population being guarded by Sirius crew, as Dana and her assistant examined the four girls in one of the houses. Walter was the first out of the hovercar and he turned to look at Alex. "You can wait in here if you want."

 

"No, you're with me; there isn't anything they can do to hurt me now. I need to face them."

 

"Okay, then come on."

 

The four men made their way to the house. Tapping on the door, Walter waited. Dana called out, "Come in."

 

The girls were sitting on a sofa and Dana was looking at the screen on her portable equipment. She glanced up at them.

 

"Dana, what does the test show?"

 

"One of the fetuses isn't viable. Two are but will carry the recessive they are trying to breed out of the bloodline. One is perfect, it's a boy."

 

Jack was a little pale; he clutched John's hand tighter as he asked. "Which one is carrying the perfect baby?"

 

"The blond girl."

 

Walter saw the shift in Jack's posture as he let go of John's hand and walked over to her. "Mandy, would you like to go live on Earth? I'll arrange for you to have the care you need, a place to live, education."

 

She looked at him, and shook her head, "I can't; my father won't let me."

 

"Your father can't stop you, child. If you want to go, then you can." Walter told her gently.

 

"What about the baby?"

 

"I'll want him to know that I'm his dad." Reaching out to John, he amended the statement. "That we're his dads. You can live with my family until you're ready to have a place of your own."

 

"I won't have to come back?"

 

"No, you won't."

 

"I'll go with you."

 

"Good. Do you have any personal belonging you want to take with you?"

 

"Please."

 

"Then go and pack them." Walter motioned to one of the security team, "Go give her a hand."

 

When they were gone. "Jack, what about the others?"

 

He looked at John and received a smile of support. "Doctor, the ones with the recessives – can they have normal lives?"

 

"Yes, they won't be impaired that severely."

 

He nodded and turned to Walter. "The non viable one should be aborted. The other two girls should be allowed to keep their babies."

 

"Alright, Jack. Dana, see to it. If there is anything you can do to give the babies a better start in life, do it."

 

"Yes, Sir."

 

Walter left the house, the other men following him. Mandy was coming out of one of the houses nearby, carrying a small bundle. A man in the group nearby began to scream at her.

 

"Mandy, where do you think you're going? I'm not going to let you leave. Get your ass back in that house, girl." Jack moved quickly to reassure her, which seemed to make her father even angrier. "Did you hear me you stupid bitch! Get back inside."

 

John strode to the man and laid him out with one blow. Standing over him, John delivered the more devastating blow. "She is no longer your concern. She carries my husband's child, a perfect son, by the way, and she's leaving here."

 

Walter watched silently, and when John came back to them, Mandy looked at her father as a single tear ran down her cheek. Walter gently took her bundle from her and watched as John and Jack led her to the vehicle.

 

She didn't look back as they left her village. Years later she would tell them of her fear that day, but she would also tell them that the four of them gave her hope.

 

It was two days before the last ship cleared the planet's atmosphere. The Councilor's plea to command had been dismissed. He had resorted to pleading that the ships currently in port be allowed to off-load. Walter gave permission for medical supplies to be left but all other cargo was denied.

 

As the last ship left orbit, Walter issued orders for them to head to their next destination, then he made his way down to his quarters.

 

Walter entered his quarters to find Jack and Alex playing a game that had been created on New Russia. Bending, he kissed Alex and then moved to the other side of the partition and stripped down for a shower.

 

"Jack, how is Mandy doing?"

 

"She's fine, Walter. Still a little nervous, but Dana says she should have an easy pregnancy. My parents will be thrilled that they are having a grandchild."

 

Walter wandered out in his robe and put his hand on Jack's shoulder. "How are you feeling?"

 

"John's looking after me, he won't let me fall."

 

"He loves you a lot. We'll be home soon and I've already arranged for you to skip the next tour. You need to get Mandy settled and you and Jack need some time to settle in."

 

"Thank you, Captain, that's very kind of you. I'd hoped for a least a month to get her settled. It's a lot for a girl her age to take in."

 

"Well, I have no doubt that you and John will give her a much better life than she would have had with that abusive father in that inbred community. On Earth she can get an education. She'll have a good support system for the child as well."

 

"I should get going. John and I are eating dinner with Mandy."

 

"Okay, Jack. We'll see you later."

 

******

 

Epilogue:

 

John and Jack had taken a short tour during Mandy's pregnancy but had arranged to be on Earth when she was due. She gave birth to a healthy son with strawberry blond hair. His dads had been with Mandy every minute of the labor, and as soon as the baby was checked by the doctor they'd been spreading the news. Walter made a ship-wide announcement as soon as the information reached him.

 

"Attention, I've just received word that Yeoman Mann and First Officer Doggett's son was born at ten thirteen local time. The child has been named…" a slow smile spread over Walter's face, "Walter Alexander John Doggett-Mann. Both fathers are doing well and the mother had an easy delivery. If anyone wants to send personal wishes please have them in so that they can be sent with the last transmission this evening."

 

Walter's head lifted, he rose and left the bridge at a run. Commander Reyes moved from his console to assume command. He'd be very glad to have Doggett come back for the next tour; he just didn't feel that a Captain mated to a New Russian had the right amount of professionalism.

 

John discovered that one of his favorite things was holding Jack as Jack held their son. They took the full two months maternity leave to bond with their son.

 

Alex met them at the shuttle bay when they returned to duty with a smile and big hugs.

 

"So, how does it feel to be a father?" He asked Jack when John went off to check in with Walter.

 

"I never expected to be one, you know. He's a beautiful baby and you should see how good John is with him."

 

"Walter and I were very excited when we saw his name. Thank you."

 

"We want to name the two of you as godfathers, just in case."

 

"I'm sure Walter will agree to that. I feel honored."

 

"How are things going with you two?"

 

"That's partly why I met you here. We're getting married. I want you to be my best man."

 

"Hey, that's fantastic. Maybe we can coordinate the christening and the wedding."

 

"We'll let the big guys work that all out. Come on, I want to show you the things I picked up for my mother. Walter requested the next run to New Russia so that he can meet my family."

 

"I'd say he's definitely gotten over his fear of commitment. Maybe in the future you'll believe John when he tells you things will be fine."

 

"I'll remember."

 

The two friends went off arm in arm to get reacquainted.


	5. V: New York 1800

  
Author's notes: Memories of past lives  
  
Thanks to Josan as always. The menu I gave them for their first dinner together was found at the following link: http://www.russianfoods.com/recipes/view/default.asp  


* * *

He woke disoriented and cold. It didn't take long for him to realize he was bound and naked. He lay still, trying to remember what had happened and how he came to be here. His last memory was of his lover walking next to him as they had left the play they had gone to see.

 

His head was pounding and he was finding it difficult to think. He tried to curl into a tight ball to conserve body heat. His heart cried out his lover's name as he slipped back into the blackness.

 

+++++++++

 

They met in the spring. He was from a rich family and they had come into New York for a family wedding. He caught sight of the beautiful man lounging across the library where the men had retired for whiskey and cigars after dinner.

 

He had never thought of other men as beautiful, but he could think of no other way to describe the sable haired, green-eyed man. He was lean and tall, his every movement graceful. When the man looked up and caught him staring, a slow sexy smile spread over his face.

 

"Who is the man standing over by the globe?" he asked his cousin.

 

"He's related to the bride. A distant cousin I believe I heard someone say. Has a strange name. Kryska or Krytin or something like that. I understand he came here from Russia just a few years ago. I also hear he is very bright. Made a fortune his first year here."

 

It was a warm evening and he wandered out onto the terrace to get away from the cloud of smoke hanging in the library. He could never quite grasp the reason behind the custom of retiring to cigars and drinks while leaving the woman to gossip. Truth be told, he was much more comfortable at the shipyards working with his men than playing the gentleman.

 

He was startled when a deep whiskey voice spoke to him from the shadows.

 

"It's difficult to breathe with all that smoke, isn't it?"

 

He turned to watch the beautiful man materialize from the shadows. The moonlight fell across the man turning his skin to alabaster. Walter sucked in a deep breath, shocked by the reaction of his body to the nearness of the man.

 

He turned quickly toward the railing around the terrace hoping to conceal that reaction from the man who was moving closer to him. Mentally he cursed the dandified clothing he wore, the cut away coat doing nothing to conceal the erection straining for freedom. The high collar suddenly seemed to be cutting off his air supply.

 

The man came to stand beside him at the rail, looking out toward the garden.

 

"This is a very beautiful home. My cousin is very excited to be joining your family."

 

"Katya is your cousin?"

 

"Yes. My uncle is the reason I left Russia to come here. He wrote me of the great opportunities in this country. He failed to mention the many beauties to be found here."

 

"Oh, you find our women to be beautiful."

 

"I wasn't referring to the...women."

 

Walter's head turned to look at the man standing next to him, wondering when he had moved so close. One step by either of them and they would be touching. His breath hitched as his groin tightened. The smile of the other man revealed even white teeth before a pink tongue peeked out between them to lick equally pink lips.

 

Alexei had seen the big man come in before dinner was served that evening. He had been standing in a quiet corner with his uncle as they watched his cousin, Katya, become the center of attention. He had asked his uncle quietly who the big balding man was, to be told he was the groom's uncle. The groom's father was Walter's much older brother, Walter being the baby of the family.

 

Alexei was a little surprised to hear this since the future father-in-law still had all his hair albeit white as snow. He had watched the man during dinner and when the gentlemen retired to the library after dinner, he had placed himself in a position to see the entire room.

 

He had been distracted by some conversation but felt the eyes watching him. Looking up and seeing it was the big man; he had given him what he thought of as his come hither smile. He was quite pleased with the slight flush rising on the man's face before he turned to speak to the man next to him.

 

Alexei had gone out onto the terrace to get some fresh air since he was not a smoker and the air was rapidly bluing with pipe and cigar smoke. He was leaning against the wall in the shadows when the big man came out the door. Deciding quickly that he wanted this man in his bed, the sooner the better, he moved forward and spoke.

 

He made inane conversation then dropped his innuendo and waited for the ripples. Standing close to the man, he could feel the heat coming from the powerful body. He knew without being able to see his erection that the man was aroused. He knew by the tempo of his breathing, by the way his hands flexed on the rail.

 

Normally Alexei would take a long time feeling someone out before he made such obvious statements, Americans not being as liberal about sex as Russians. But this man was somehow different. From the moment he had seen him come into the house, Alexei had wanted him.

 

He waited and the silence drew out until he thought he had made an error in judgement.

 

"I have found my own idea of beauty changed recently. It's an odd feeling to see beauty where you never expected to see it."

 

"And where did you see this beauty?"

 

"Tonight, in my brother's library, through a cloud of cigar smoke."

 

The warm chuckle told Walter that the man had understood him, perfectly. Walter was impressed with how quickly this man had read him through the social veneer men of his class wore. Most people – women especially – either didn’t bother or didn’t succeed.

 

"Well, it seems your brother's house is filled with beauty this spring night. Since you seem to care for smoking as little as I, perhaps you would care to retire to my home with me for a nightcap and further conversation on beauty found in unexpected places."

 

"Aren't you staying with your uncle?"

 

"No, I have my own home. I could have my carriage bring you back later if you like. I noticed you refused the whiskey. Maybe cognac would suit your palate better. Or if you prefer to try something different, I do have something from home that might suit your taste."

 

"Well, if we are going to retire to your home for cognac, perhaps I should introduce myself. I'm Walter Skinner."

 

Walter turned to hold out his hand. It was taken in a surprisingly strong grip and held just a moment longer than normal custom decreed. He noted the smoothness of the man's skin compared to the rough calluses on his from his work at the shipyard.

 

"Alexei Krycek. It's a *pleasure* to meet you, Mr. Skinner."

 

The smile that accompanied his words went straight to Walter's crotch. 'Damn' thought Walter 'What's happening to me? Men have never appealed to me. Why this man?'

 

Out loud he said, "We can reach the drive without going back through the house. Unless you wish to say goodnight to your uncle or cousin."

 

Walter's suggestion was for two reasons. One, he didn't really want to advertise that he was leaving with the Russian. Two, the darkness was helping conceal his erection. Entering the house would expose him to the possibility of others noticing his condition, his breeches, in the style of the time, being well fitted. They wouldn't hide his erection, which was larger than that of most men. He figured by the time they arrived at Alexei's home he would have it under control.

 

Alexei had other plans.

 

"They will not look for me. They know I usually leave soon after dinner. The conversations after dinner are not generally to my liking."

 

Walter gestured toward the stairs that led down from the terrace. The two men moved side by side down the stairs and around the house. Once they arrived at the drive Alexei pointed out his carriage. When they reached his carriage, he called out softly to his driver who appeared to be dozing on his seat.

 

The driver jumped down to open the door. Alexei waved Walter inside then climbed in after giving instructions to the driver in what Walter thought must be Russian. Walter was startled when Alexei sat on the seat next to him. He had expected the other man to sit across from him. He moved toward the side of the carriage, but the space did not allow him to go far.

 

Walter's teeth clenched as the other man's leg brushed against his. It was then that he realized how good the man smelled. Not of the heavy perfumes designed to hide the smell of unwashed bodies, but a spicy musk that added to the desire his body was trying desperately to make him acknowledge.

 

The jolting of the carriage over the cobblestones seemed to be conspiring against him as well. Each lurch of the conveyance rocked the two men, causing their thighs to rub together. One unseen hole so deep the violent movement tossed Alexei's lighter weight into the air and he landed partly in Walter's lap.

 

Walter knew his face was flaming. There was no way the other man could be oblivious to his condition. Not after Alexei's hand ended up on the erection that had suddenly developed a mind of its own. So much for thinking he would get it under control before they arrived at the Russian's home.

 

Alexei was quite pleased with the evidence of the other man's arousal. He refrained from commenting on it and instead yelled at his driver to be careful. He was pleased that the big man was so easy to arouse.

 

Walter was wondering what had possessed him to agree to go home with the man. He knew there were men who enjoyed other men. He knew some of the captains he worked with made use of their cabin boys while at sea. Of course, once in port, they returned to their wives or visited female whores so he had always thought it was just the long voyages that were responsible.

 

He had no real experience with men who loved other men, or men who had no desire for women. He was still trying to figure out how to explain his reaction if asked when they arrived at Alexei's home. Hell, there was no way he could explain it to another when he himself didn't understand.

 

Alexei was out of the carriage almost before it stopped. He turned, the moonlight bathed him as he held out his hand, and Walter stepped down from the carriage to join him.

 

He ignored his brain screaming that he should stop before it was too late. Instead he allowed his little head to lead him inside.

 

Later he would realize that he had never been able to say "No" to this man in any of his lifetimes.

 

Alexei kept his eyes above Walter's waist as he led him into his parlor. Once Walter was seated, Alexei moved over to the bar in the corner.

 

"Would you like to try some vodka, Mr. Skinner?"

 

"Think I’ll stick to something I know for the moment. I'll have the cognac. And please call me Walter."

 

"Then you must call me Alexei."

 

He poured them both a healthy portion of cognac and handed the glass to Walter. This time Walter was not surprised when Alexei joined him on the sofa. He swirled his cognac in the glass and avoided looking at the man next to him.

 

The silence stretched out as they savored the cognac. Walter's silence was due to his attempt to get his body under control. Alexei was quiet as he waited for the other man to relax.

 

"My uncle tells me you are the younger brother. So you are not much older than your nephew?"

 

"Only three years. I'm actually the baby of the family. I run the family shipyard business. I have rooms near the shipyard but normally stay at my brother's for family events or holidays."

 

Walter snapped his mouth shut, realizing he was blabbering like a schoolboy. Alexei smiled into his snifter at the man's nervousness. Maybe he should offer another drink and give Walter more time. He reached to take the empty glass, turning the gesture into a caress by trailing his fingers over the back of the strong hand. Alexei was immensely pleased with the way Walter's hand followed his slightly before he jerked it back as if singed.

 

The look in Walter's eyes when he came back with the glass seemed to be a mixture of puzzlement and lust. Alexei settled next to him after handing him the glass.

 

"It's my understanding that the elder son inherits and younger sons must make their own way."

 

"In most families that is true. But my mother had monies of her own and left them to me. I work to help keep the family holdings prosperous, as well as to keep away boredom. I can't imagine lying around, living off one's money with nothing to keep the mind alert."

 

"From your hands it would seem that you have no aversion to physical labor."

 

"I enjoy using my hands. It's a pleasure to take a piece of wood and make something useful from it. I've made most of my own furnishings. My brother finds me very eccentric."

 

"And do you enjoy doing other less taxing things with your hands?"

 

"I'm not sure I understand what you are asking."

 

"I personally, derive great pleasure from using my hands for lovemaking. I enjoy making my lover purr with delight. I've been told that I am quite talented."

 

Walter squirmed as the long fingered hand ran along his inner thigh. Pulling in a deep breath, he decided to ask the question outright. "My brother is the diplomat of the family, I tend to speak more plainly."

 

"Please do."

 

"Are you implying that you make love with other men?"

 

"I am not implying, Walter. I will speak plainly as well. I want you."

 

"You want me? Why me? Do I look like a man who enjoys other men?"

 

"Do I? We aren't branded at birth. Most of us stay very discreet. Men of my leaning have been tortured, mutilated, burned alive."

 

"Why do you want me?"

 

"Why are you hard?"

 

"I don't know."

 

"You mean...you've never...?"

 

"I've only been with women."

 

"I apologize, Sir. I meant no offence. Please forgive me."

 

Alexei was up and ringing the bell for the servant. He kept his back to Walter and when the servant arrived, he gave hurried instructions in Russian. Without turning, he spoke.

 

"My carriage will be brought around to take you home. My servant will see you out."

 

He walked past the servant and Walter got up to follow but the servant blocked his way. Alexei disappeared up the stairs. The servant made it clear he was to leave by guiding him toward the door. He allowed himself to be pushed toward the door and out to the waiting carriage. Part of his mind told him this was right. That he should never have come.

 

The ride home gave him time to go back over every word, every gesture, and every smile. Remembering the look in Alexei's eyes when he said he had only been with women. A flash of fear followed by regret. When he arrived at his brother's home, he quickly sought his rooms, avoiding the people still lingering in the house.

 

He undressed and climbed into the cold bed, lying there trying to ignore that part of his anatomy that had been hard for hours. Finally he took himself in hand and tried to remember his last encounter with the woman who had been receiving his favors of late.

 

But a vision of white teeth flashing below sparkling green eyes kept interfering. Finally he gave up trying to visualize a woman and pictured Alexei instead. He quickly reached climax with Alexei's name whispered as the eruption began.

 

Not so very far away, Alexei was taking a less direct route. He had gone to his room and spent several long minutes mentally kicking himself for being so rash. His concern was for his cousin as well as himself. He knew that if Walter told his brother what had happened, the man would probably call off the wedding at the very least. He could take whatever might befall him as long as she was not harmed by his actions.

 

He paced back and forth, berating himself until finally he could take no more. One of the servants followed him as he left the house, his destination the part of town where men with his desires met when seeking companionship.

 

He was very drunk when the boy sat next to him. So drunk he would have been robbed by the boy if his manservant had not been watching. He was kissing the boy in the alley behind the bar when the silent manservant relieved the boy of the knife he had been about to use on Alexei.

 

The manservant hurried to get his master home. As he got him into his bed, he shook his head sadly as his master talked about his yearning for the big man who had been there earlier. He had known his master since childhood and had never seen him drunk. Never seen him care one way or another if a man turned him down.

 

The next evening and another party was being held to celebrate the coming wedding. Alexei attended it with dread. The entire day had been spent in trepidation. Every knock on the door sending a stab through him. He fully expected to have his cousin, at his doorstep, in tears before the day ended.

 

He searched the room when he entered but Walter was nowhere in sight. He wasn't sure if that made it better or worse. Somehow he got through the evening and hurried home, glad nothing had been said. Hoping that Walter was willing to let it drop.

 

Walter had spent the next day trying to figure out this obsession, which seemed to have taken over his life. He had never been drawn to anyone this way. He knew that his family would not approve. Knew his brother would disown him if such a relationship ever became public knowledge.

 

Knew if he even told his brother about the man's advances toward him that the wedding would be called off. And he couldn't let that happen. His nephew was very much in love with Katya and she with him. Even a blind man would see that.

 

He had made an excuse to miss the party that night. Not because he was afraid of what Alexei might do but because he didn't know yet what he wanted to do. He stayed away until the day of the wedding, much to his brother's displeasure. In times of public celebration, his family expected him to participate in the approved norm.

 

Alexei dressed for his cousin's wedding having reached a calm state of mind. He had cautiously asked questions of the bridegroom about his uncle and come to certain conclusions. From the things he had learned, he felt that Walter would not do anything to hurt his nephew. Daniel told him that his uncle was a man of action, a man who met problems head on and took care of things.

 

So even though he was not looking forward to dealing with this blazing desire he could not tamp down, he at least was not dreading the day. He arrived early to find his cousin still dressing and his uncle pacing. When she was finally ready, he gasped at her beauty.

 

Alexei spotted Walter already seated on the groom's side of the church when he arrived. He took his place in the row where his uncle would join him after giving the bride away. He kept his eyes front until he couldn't stand the feeling of being watched any longer.

 

Turning slightly, trying for a casual look, he glanced toward the other side of the aisle. The brown eyes stared at him intently and a quick nod was directed at him before the man looked away. Alexei released a breath he hadn't realized he had been holding. Everything was fine. Walter had no intention of stopping the wedding.

 

Walter had spent the intervening time fighting his own internal battle. His days had been spent working, his nights in his carpentry shop. His excuse, he was building a wardrobe for his nephew and his new bride. When in reality he was trying to tire himself to the point of dreamless sleep.

 

He woke mornings, working himself to climax with the Russian's name on his lips. He had even tried a visit to the woman he had been seeing and had been extremely embarrassed when he could not perform with her.

 

The day of the wedding dawned with Walter determined to speak with Alexei and end the torment one way or another. After all, they were about to become family and he would be forced to be in the company of the other man on a regular basis.

 

He was surprised at how his heart raced when the dark-haired man entered the row across from him. The look of apprehension was easy to read in the green eyes when they finally turned his way. He nodded once in reassurance to the man, adding one more item to his list of things to discuss with him.

 

Neither of them heard much of the ceremony. They responded when those around them did. Somehow they ended up walking out of the church together. Later each would admit to himself, but not to the other, that it *felt* right to be walking side by side.

 

Walter indulged more than normal at the reception. Each time he looked at Alexei and caught his eye, he would down another drink. By the time the newlyweds left, he was quite in his cups. His brother had noticed this with surprise, drinking too much had never been a habit of his normally level headed younger brother.

 

Alexei, on the other hand, had taken not a drop other than a sip of the wedding toast. He didn't want his judgement impaired in any way, having made the only mistake he ever intended to make with this family. He was in the foyer preparing to leave when Walter came out of the ballroom followed by his older brother, Arthur.

 

"Walter, you are too drunk to sit a horse. If you insist on leaving, I'll have a carriage brought around to take you home."

 

"You have too many guests for me to stay here. I'm fine, I tell you. Leave me alone." His slurred speech and crooked gait giving away his intoxication.

 

Against his better judgement Alexei felt he had to offer his assistance. After all, he was now part of the family and family took care of their own.

 

"My carriage is waiting. Perhaps Walter would allow me to see that he gets home."

 

Walter staggered toward the line of Kryceks, grinning at what his alcohol sodden mind thought was an invitation. His brother trailed behind him, ready to catch him if he started to fall. As fate decreed, he traversed the floor fine until within touching distance of Alexei.

 

About two feet from the chorus line only he could see, Walter tripped over his own feet, pitching headlong into the arms of the one true Alexei. Alexei staggered backward while keeping Walter semi upright. Arthur had moved forward but stopped when he saw that Alexei could handle it.

 

"See, Walter, you're drunk. You can't ride. Since Mr. Krycek has graciously offered to see you home, I suggest you allow it." Arthur's tone managed to convey both embarrassment and exasperation.

 

Brown eyes looked into green as Walter hoped his meaning would be understood. "Take me home."

 

Green eyes asked for confirmation. "Let me get you home to bed."

 

Arthur followed them to the carriage in case his brother should prove too much for Alexei to handle. He was surprised at the ease with which the smaller man manipulated his bear of a brother. It did, however, take them both to push the drunken man up into the carriage but Walter did not resist the help.

 

Alexei turned to bid Arthur goodbye. He waited until the older man had gone back inside to lean into the carriage to confirm that he had understood the man waiting there. After the last time they had been together, he wanted to make no further missteps.

 

"Walter, tell me your address so I can instruct the driver."

 

"No! Your home. Need to talk."

 

"All right, Walter."

 

Alexei gave his driver instructions and, for the first time had them questioned. Pavel remembered the last time he had driven Walter to Alexei's home. He also remembered the aftermath. The anger of the houseman at the way his master had been hurt. Anger that Alexei could have been killed when he sought solace with another.

 

Alexei's anger at being questioned was offset by his knowledge that this man cared for him and just wanted to protect him. So he was curt but not cruel as he told the man to mind his business. Alexei climbed into the carriage but this time sat across from Walter.

 

"Why are you over there? Come sit next to me, like last time." Walter's leer might have been charming but it was offset by the slurred speech that clearly showed his drunken condition.

 

"I think it's better if I stay here." Alexei grinned ruefully.

 

"Fine, I'll come over there."

 

Walter lurched out of his seat at the exact moment the carriage hit a bump and ended up sprawled face down in Alexei's lap. Alexei moaned as the touch of the man along with his fantasies of having Walter in just that very position combined to give him an instant erection. His body didn't care that it wasn't real and that the face down man was drunk.

 

Alexei reached to grab Walter and get him upright. The light from the passing street lamps showed him the grin on the big man's face as he wrestled Walter up onto the seat. Even drunk, his senses weren't so dull that he hadn't felt the erection brushing against his face.

 

Walter was just drunk enough to have lost his inhibitions. He had mentally kicked himself many times in the last few weeks. His mind had wondered what it would be like to 'purr with delight' for the man seated next to him. His drink-addled mind was forming witty conversation that his tongue could not produce.

 

The rest of the ride was spent with Walter trying to get his thoughts together and Alexei telling his anatomy that nothing was coming its way.

 

The driver helped Alexei get Walter out of the carriage and into the house.

 

Walter tried to turn toward the parlor, "Want to taste that vodka you offered me last time."

 

Firmly, Alexei guided him to the stairs. "I don't think so, Walter. You've had plenty to drink tonight. Now, up we go."

 

Instructing his houseman to light the guestroom, he followed slowly with Walter.

 

"I don't want to go to bed. Want to talk."

 

"You need to sleep. We can talk in the morning."

 

They had made it up four steps before Walter missed his footing and went down on one knee. Alexei bent to grab his arm, helping him back to his feet.

 

"Oops." Alexei grinned at the giggle from the big man. He wouldn't have thought that voice could make a sound like that.

 

"Yes, Walter. Oops. Easy, just a little further."

 

Once in the guestroom, he dismissed the servant who had just finished lighting the lamp by the bed.

 

"You should get undressed and go to bed, Walter. I'll make sure everyone knows to be quiet in the morning."

 

He watched as Walter tried to undress himself. Finally he sighed and moved forward to help him. He soon had him naked. His eyes firmly fixed over a shoulder so he saw very little of the man. He led Walter to the bed, pulled the covers back and waited for him to crawl into the bed.

 

As he pulled the covers up over the prone man, a strong hand grabbed his wrist and he was pulled down to land on his back on top of Walter. He gasped when another big hand slithered over his chest and closed over his crotch. Alexei's cock was very happy with that turn of events and expressed its pleasure by springing to attention.

 

Alexei moaned deep in his throat as he tried to pull the big man's hand away. Much as he would like to give Walter free rein, he didn't want to chance waking up to rejection the next day.

 

"Walter, stop!"

 

The command in the voice was unmistakable. Walter let go, looking at the man who had barked at him as Alexei scrambled off the bed.

 

"I thought you wanted me? Guess I missed the chance?" Walter's voice low, sounding almost like a boy who had been told he couldn't go out to play.

 

Alexei moved so he was sitting next to Walter on the bed. He smoothed the covers over the man as he looked deeply into the brown eyes.

 

"I do want you. But not like this. Not when you are too drunk to make reasonable decisions. If I ever have you, it will be because you want it one hundred percent."

 

"What do you mean?"

 

"I mean that I don't want just one night with you. I've had men that way. It's empty and I don't want it to be that with you. I've done a lot of thinking over the last few weeks. I felt something the first time I saw you that I've never felt before."

 

"I don't understand."

 

"I'm not sure how to explain."

 

"Try, please."

 

"It's what the French call deja vu. Recognition, as if I have always known you. So it can't just be a fling. It means more than that to me."

 

Walter stared at him for a long moment then seemed to come to a conclusion. Later he would tell Alexei that he had felt entranced when they met.

 

"Will you kiss me goodnight?" He asked plaintively.

 

Alexei nodded and bent forward. His lips were soft as they moved over Walter's. A big hand reached up and tentatively held the back of his head. Walter sighed, opening his mouth and Alexei accepted the invitation to slip inside.

 

When Alexei pulled back, Walter immediately let go. The two men stared into each other's eyes, knowing deep inside that there was no going back now.

 

"Sleep, Walter. I'll see you in the morning."

 

"I'll still want this in the light of day and cold sober."

 

Alexei smiled softly, "Well then, if that is so, you shall have it."

 

"You'll teach me to purr?" Walter's voice questioned hesitantly.

 

"I'll teach you to purr...for starters." Alexei's deep voice lascivious as he answered.

 

Alexei rose gracefully and walked over to the washstand. Opening the cabinet underneath, he retrieved a chamber pot and placed it next to the bed.

 

"Just in case the wine doesn't want to stay down. Goodnight." The wicked grin teasing.

 

He turned the lamp down very low and left the other man to sleep. In his own bed, he dared to hope and dream while bringing himself relief before he found his own rest.

 

The next morning, Walter woke with a head pounding and the momentary lack of memory as to where he was. He squinted in the too bright room as memory began returning. His mind replayed the conversation of the night before and a slow smile spread across his face.

 

He rose carefully and dressed before making his way downstairs, following his nose toward the smells of coffee and tea. He found Alexei sitting in the parlor with a tray on the small table in front of him.

 

"Good morning, Walter. How's your head?"

 

"Still attached, I think." Alexei watched Walter wince as he moved forward slowly.

 

"Good. I had cook make tea and coffee since I wasn't sure which you would prefer."

 

"Coffee in the mornings, tea in the afternoon."

 

Alexei reached for a cup and poured the strong brew. He handed it to Walter as the man settled next to him on the sofa. He moved the sugar and cream within easy reach of his guest and then picked his own cup up to take a sip.

 

Alexei thought 'So far so good. He's up, he hasn't run screaming from the house. And he's sitting next to me.'

 

They sat in silence as the coffee worked its magic on Walter. The pounding of his head had begun receding by the time he held out his cup for a refill. He was acutely aware of the clean scent of the man next to him and felt foul in comparison.

 

"Would you mind having your driver take me home? I'd like to bathe and change."

 

"Of course, Walter. I'll have the carriage brought around. Would you like some breakfast first or more coffee?"

 

"No, thank you. But if you offer me dinner, my stomach should have settled by then."

 

"Dinner it is then. I'll have cook make something Russian for you."

 

"I'd like that."

 

Alexei summoned the houseman and gave instructions. When the carriage arrived, he walked Walter to the door. As he reached for the door handle, Walter's hand closed over his. He turned and Walter's free hand cupped his face before his lips covered Alexei's.

 

The kiss was unhurried and gentle and, by the time it was finished, both men were aroused. Walter stepped back and surveyed the face of the man he had just kissed for the second time. He was highly satisfied with the deep green the eyes had turned. He traced the bottom lip with his thumb and moved farther back, releasing the hand on the doorknob.

 

"What time shall I be here tonight?"

 

"At seven. See you then."

 

"I'll be here."

 

Before the carriage was out of sight, Alexei was in the kitchen issuing orders for dinner that night. The menu would consist of cold borsch, potato pie, chakhokhbili, vegetables golubtsy, and lemon tvorozhnik for dessert. He planned to give Walter a taste for all things Russian, not just himself.

 

Promptly at seven, Walter arrived. He had spent most of the day with butterflies in his stomach. His practical side worried that he would mess it up somehow. In the weeks since that first touch, he had made his peace with the fact that he wanted a man. Had examined all the problems that might arise and decided to face them as he had always faced life. Head on and head high.

 

Alexei had fussed until the cook had run him out of the kitchen, waving her rolling pin at him. He had made sure the vodka was iced so it would be cold, the way he favored it. His best linens adorned the table along with his finest china and silver.

 

He paced in his entry hall from six-thirty until he heard the horse stop out in front. He yanked the bell pull so hard in his haste to have someone come to see to Walter's horse it almost came loose.

 

Dinner consisted of conversation that went nowhere. Both men thinking about where the night was going to end, but neither of them talked about it. Walter had asked to compliment the cook and Alexei had sent for her, knowing she would be pleased with his praise.

 

Walter listened to Alexei translate his words to the cook and, when they were alone again, commented that he would need to learn Russian and the servants should learn some English. Alexei took that as a sign that he intended to be around awhile.

 

After dinner, they were seated in the parlor as they had been on the first night. Both men were suddenly tongue tied as they sipped the cognac Alexei had poured for them. Finally, the glasses were empty, both men leaning forward to place the glasses down at the same time.

 

Two hands brushed against each other and a soft moan came from the bigger man. He turned his hand and entwined Alexei's fingers with his. Eyes met in a long moment of silent communication and they rose without a word. Alexei leading the way to his bedroom.

 

Once there, he made quick work of Walter's clothing, kissing every inch of skin as it was laid bare for him. Walter stood very still, watching the man's nimble fingers as they stripped him and aroused him. He lay upon the bed when the covers were pulled back and watched as Alexei divested himself of his own clothes.

 

He moved to the center of the big bed, making room for Alexei as the man he had chosen to be his only male lover lay next to him. Walter was soon lost in sensations as Alexei did indeed show him how talented his fingers could be. Walter was kissed as the fingers found his nipples in the fur on his chest and brought them erect. Pinching almost painfully as the kiss deepened.

 

The indrawn hiss of air told Alexei that the nipple he had begun sucking enjoyed being played that way. Walter's head went back and his back arched up into the sensation, a hand worked one nipple as the mouth sucked and bit the other.

 

When Alexei's hand moved down to slip between his legs, he opened gladly. The fingers rolling his heavy balls made him purr as he had been told he would. His cock was standing tall, his hips thrusting against the air seeking contact.

 

Alexei pushed up on his elbow to look down at the writhing man, his fingers continuing the assault on the balls and the tender area behind them. Much better than his fantasies. As if he knew he was being watched, Walter opened his eyes and his hips stilled. The need in those eyes caused Alexei to growl possessively.

 

"No one was ever more beautiful than you are at this moment, Walter."

 

"No, I'm not. You are."

 

"You must learn never to argue with me."

 

Alexei grinned wickedly before he twisted and pulled Walter's cock into his mouth. Walter suddenly learned to speak in tongues as well as levitate. His hands tangled in the hair fanned over his stomach as he experienced his first blowjob.

 

The whimpers turned into a high keening, Walter trying not to let go.

 

"Please...I'm going to...have to..."

 

Walter tried to pull Alexei up and away but the other man was too strong and too intent on his need to give pleasure. With a loud shout, Walter lost his battle for control. His hips jerked against the hands holding him in place as his seed flowed into the hot, wet mouth of his lover.

 

Alexei rode the climax out with him, swallowing every drop, savoring this first taste of his lover. When Walter went limp, he gave the softening cock a long sensuous lick from base to crown and crawled back up next to Walter, watching him as he came back to earth.

 

When Walter's eyes opened, he looked at Alexei with awe. He had never come so hard in his life. His hand moved to pull Alexei close as he tried to put his feelings into the kiss. Their tongues warred for dominance, Alexei winning. When he released Walter's mouth, he reveled in the sigh the other man could not contain.

 

"No wonder you said I would purr. No one's ever done that to me. I still can't believe you let me come in your mouth."

 

"Why not? You taste good."

 

Walter's happy laugh rang out in the room and he pulled the smaller man to him. His eyes widened when he felt Alexei's erection pressing against his thigh. He slipped a hand between them, closed it tentatively over the thickness of the other man and squeezed gently.

 

"I'm sure I can't do that as well as you but I'm willing to try."

 

"We'll have plenty of time for you to learn. But I'd rather do something else if you will let me."

 

"What?"

 

"I want to come inside you. I'll go very slowly and see that the passage is well oiled and opened first. I have no desire to take my pleasure at the expense of your pain."

 

The look of hope in Alexei's eyes would have swayed Walter if nothing else had. He believed in fair play and he had just received the most erotic experience of his life. He wanted to please the man who had given that to him.

 

He swallowed hard and nodded, words again fleeing from the strangeness of the evening. Alexei's smile a reward all on its own. Walter watched as Alexei moved into a kneeling position between his legs.

 

"Could you pass me that small vial on the table, please, Walter?"

 

Walter turned, spotted the small bottle, picked it up and handed it to Alexei. He watched as some of the sweet smelling oil was poured onto those elegant fingers. He tensed as the fingers found his puckered hole and rubbed over it slowly, making no move to enter. Alexei took his time just stroking over the hole again and again until he felt the body relax.

 

"Raise your legs for me, lover."

 

Walter pulled them up and Alexei directed them into the position he wanted. Taking the bottle once more, he poured a small amount directly onto Walter, just behind his balls, and let it run downward on its own. A slight smile graced his lips as the big man squirmed when the oil tickled the sensitized flesh.

 

The fingers rubbed the hole again in the way Walter was finding pleasurable. His gasp when one dipped inside showed surprise not pain. Alexei stayed still with just the one finger pressed inside until he felt the muscles relax. Then he began to fuck Walter with firm but lazy strokes.

 

When Walter's body began to rock toward the invasion, he slipped a second finger inside. Brown eyes flew open and, for just the barest second, fear showed. The crooking of the fingers inside sent a jolt of fire through him and all fear was forgotten.

 

"You all right, Walter?"

 

"Yessss. What did you just do?"

 

"Feel good?"

 

"Really good."

 

Alexei's eyes sparkled as he crooked his fingers again, rubbing the spot harder. Walter's moan making music in the room. Alexei pulled his fingers out as the hips rose to try and keep them. He applied more oil and this time entered with three fingers.

 

Walter hissed as the intrusion burned slightly and Alexei kept his fingers still but bent forward to capture a nipple in his mouth. Walter forgot the burn as his focus shifted to the nipple being lightly bitten. Walter hands closed around Alexei's face and he was pulled him up to ravage his mouth.

 

By the time the kiss was over, Alexei's cock was screaming at him with need.

 

"Walter, please, I need to..."

 

"Do it. I want to give you the pleasure you gave me."

 

Walter raised up as he watched Alexei slick his cock for entry. When the head pressed against him, he tensed for a breath and Alexei went still, waiting. When Walter nodded, he pushed forward and the head breached the ring of muscle. Again Walter tensed and, again, Alexei waited.

 

Alexei was surprised when two hands grabbed his hips and pulled him in. Both men froze. Walter with the sudden pain of the forced entry, Alexei with fear that Walter would never want to do this again with this introduction.

 

Walter panted as the burn and pain eased. Alexei's eyes watching, waiting for rejection. Walter pulled him down for another kiss, then guided his head back toward a nipple. Alexei smiled as he sucked the nub into his mouth.

 

He spent several long minutes keeping his lower body still as he worked on first one nipple then the other. When he felt Walter's cock beginning to harden against his stomach, he pulled out part way and eased back inside. Walter responded by pulling his head up to kiss him again.

 

Alexei began to pump into his lover, taking it slow and only pulling out partially. When he felt the other man was completely hard again, he pushed up with his arms to look at Walter's face.

 

"Is this all right? I'm not hurting you, am I?"

 

"No. I feel full but it doesn't hurt."

 

Alexei nodded and rose up on his knees, lifting Walter's legs to rest on his shoulders. He pumped into the tight passage several times, changing his angle slightly each time until the other man whimpered. Pulling out all but the head, he slammed back inside at the same angle. He was very pleased when the eyes he had been watching darkened and he felt the muscles tighten on him.

 

"Good?"

 

"Yes! Do it!"

 

Alexei threw his head back and proceeded to pound into Walter with all his might. The only sounds in the room were Alexei's loud panting and the whimpers of pleasure coming from the man he was riding.

 

When Alexei knew he was close, he reached to stroke Walter, bringing him quickly to his second climax of the night. The ass tightened almost painfully around Alexei as Walter's come shot into the air. Alexei came deep inside with a loud shout of triumph. Then fell forward to lie on the broad chest of the only man he would ever truly love.

 

They dozed for a short while. Alexei roused himself sometime later to ring for warm water. He cleaned his new lover with languid gentle strokes of a soft cloth. Enjoying the way the brown eyes sparkled at him. When he finished cleaning himself, he walked back to the bed wondering if Walter would stay the night or want to leave.

 

He got his answer when he was pulled down into the bed and the covers arranged over them before two strong arms pulled him close. He snuggled his head onto a shoulder with a contented sigh, then smiled when he felt the lips press briefly against his hairline.

 

Over the next few months, the two men spent their days much as they had before they met: Walter at the shipyard and Alexei caring for his business. The nights were filled with Alexei teaching Walter not only the best way to purr but also to beg, whimper, and scream.

 

Walter learned to give excellent head long before he learned any Russian other than the words of lovemaking. All things considered, that was just fine with Alexei. Each day found him more in love with the big rowdy man who shared his bed. The servants were known to smile often as the relationship grew, the happiness of the two men making their lives smooth.

 

Then Alexei made the only mistake of their relationship. He took Walter out to a private club for dinner. A club that was for members only.

 

"Walter, it's been six months since we became lovers. I want to celebrate. There's a club I know where we can go for a nice dinner. A place where no one will care if I decide I must touch you during the meal. I can show you off, make the others jealous that I have such a handsome lover to warm my bed."

 

Walter laughed, "Handsome? Well, not ugly, but handsome? I think, they'll be jealous of me for having you."

 

He laughed again as Alexei playfully swatted at his naked ass leaving a red handprint. Walter had become quickly used to the fact that his lover liked seeing him marked. The clothing of the time was perfect for hiding the marks his lover left on his body.

 

The high collars hid the purple marks that always adorned his neck. His other clothing hiding the marks from fingers that gripped tightly as Alexei flooded him with his come. His breeches hiding bruises from having his ass spanked when his lover was in that kind of mood.

 

Walter knew himself to be deeply in love with Alexei. Many times he thanked the fates that he was the younger brother and therefore would not be nagged about getting married. The family assumed that he and Alexei had become friends since all family gatherings were attended together.

 

This made the events both easier and harder. Easier because they had each other for companionship if the guests were boring. Harder because they could not touch and touching had become important to them. So the idea of being around others where touching would be possible had its appeal.

 

"When did you want to go? And what shall I wear since you are showing me off?"

 

"We'll go on Friday. Your new coat should be finished by then."

 

Walter was pulled back toward the rumpled bed to be given more lessons in purring.

 

Friday, the weather was warmer than normal, which meant that the place was crowded. The table they were given placed them in view of most of the other diners. Walter was amused by the way Alexei kept touching him when he saw anyone look their way.

 

They were on waiting for dessert to be served when the tall hazel-eyed man came in. He saw Alexei and made a beeline for the table.

 

"Alexei, I haven't seen you in ages. How are you?"

 

"I'm well."

 

The irritation in Alexei's voice caused Walter's head to jerk around to look at his lover. The man pulled a chair from the table next to them and sat without being asked.

 

"Aren't you going to introduce me to this gorgeous man? Is he the reason you've dropped out of sight lately?"

 

Alexei frowned, but still showed his good manners even though his voice was frigid.

 

"Fox Mulder, this is Walter Skinner."

 

"Pleasure to meet you, Mr. Skinner. Seems Alexei has been holding out on us. Where did he find you?"

 

Walter was annoyed at the brass of the man asking questions he considered none of the man's business, plus the way the man was staring at him was making him uncomfortable. The tensing of Alexei's body telling him that Alexei was displeased as well. He decided to make his answer short and give minimal information.

 

"We met at an engagement party."

 

"Ah, I see and you've been together ever since, right?"

 

"Yes, Fox, that's pretty much the way of it." There was a warning tone to the voice that Walter picked up on even if the other man did not.

 

"Alexei, you've found the love of your life, at last. And you, Mr. Skinner? You feel the same?"

 

"Most definitely."

 

"What a pity. I was hoping to invite you to go out for a drink with me sometime. My party has arrived. Enjoy your evening, gentlemen."

 

The chair was replaced and Mulder went to join the two men who had just come through the door. Alexei called the waiter over, cancelled the dessert, paid the bill and then led his thoughtful lover from the dining room.

 

Walter waited until they were in the carriage to speak.

 

"Alexei, how do you know that man?"

 

"I don't wish to talk about him, Walter. Just steer clear of him if you see him again. Under no circumstances are you to go out with him."

 

The vehemence in Alexei's voice startled Walter. It was very true that he was the bottom in the relationship, but Alexei had never issued commands of this nature to him before. A part of him rebelled at the idea of being ordered about, but his logical side intervened. After all, he was in love and had no desire to seek his pleasure elsewhere. Therefore it was a small concession to make, especially considering he had not liked the man.

 

Still, he was concerned at the intensity of his lover on the subject. He made up his mind to try and discover the reasons at a later time. He reached to pull the smaller man into his lap and proceeded to kiss away the frown. By the time they reached home, there was no mention of a nightcap, it was straight to bed.

 

The matter was pretty much forgotten until a few weeks later when Walter ran into Mulder at a social function he had been forced to attend to represent his brother who was too ill to go. He hadn't seen the other man at dinner but then it was a large gathering.

 

He had found a spot as far from the smoke as possible after dinner and was listening to the conversation with a false attentive look on his face when he was bumped rudely from the side. Turning, he found himself looking into hazel eyes.

 

"Excuse me, Mr. Skinner. I didn't mean to bump you that way. How are you?"

 

"I'm fine, Sir. How are you?"

 

"Oh, excellent. How is Alexei?"

 

Walter shot him a warning look, to which Mulder replied by grinning mischievously.

 

"I assume he is fine. I'll give him your regards the next time I see him."

 

"That would be kind of you. May I get you a drink?"

 

"No, thank you. I seldom drink. It isn't a habit I'm fond of."

 

"Nor is smoking it seems. Must make this part of the evening most tedious for you. Especially when the conversation isn't scintillating."

 

"I'm here to represent my family tonight, not to be stimulated by the conversation."

 

"Really? And here I was hoping you would be so bored I could entice you to leave with me."

 

"I'm afraid not. It wouldn't do for me to be rude to my host."

 

"Perhaps you would allow me to take you to lunch later in the week. I know a place that serves delicious French cuisine. It would be my treat of course."

 

"Sorry, no. That is quite out of the question. I work days in the family business."

 

"Ah, yes. The shipyards I believe someone told me. You see, I've made it a point to find out about you."

 

"Sir, may I just say that my business is none of yours. I'm flattered that you wanted to know about me. But I think the circumstances of our first meeting would have told you I'm permanently engaged."

 

"Possessive, is he?"

 

"Very."

 

"Can't say that I blame him for that. He has a tendency to lose things, I...to find them."

 

"He won't lose this one."

 

"Yes. Well, the days are long...much can happen. I'll bid you goodbye, for now."

 

Walter watched as the man made his way out of the room. He wasn't pleased with the way the man had looked at him. It took him several moments to realize he had seen eyes with that expression before. A shiver ran through him when he finally remembered where. A friend of the family had that same look when he had been carted off to the asylum.

 

Fox Mulder was insane.

 

When he arrived at what he now considered to be his home, he found Alexei snuggled in bed, reading as he waited for him.

 

"How was the dinner?"

 

"Dinner was fine but the after dinner part wasn't."

 

"What happened?"

 

Walter began to undress as he answered.

 

"Fox Mulder was there."

 

"Did you talk to him?"

 

"Kind of hard to avoid when someone deliberately bumps into you."

 

"What did the bastard have to say?"

 

"He asked how I was, how you are, offered to get me a drink."

 

"You turned him down, right?"

 

"Of course, I did. Alexei, what happened between you two? I can tell there is bad blood so tell me."

 

"It doesn't matter, just stay away from him as I told you."

 

Walter had shucked the last of his clothes and he walked to the bed, reaching over to take the book from Alexei. He marked the place with a ribbon then set the book on the table by the bed. Alexei had moved over to make room for him. As soon as Walter was under the covers, Alexei kissed him possessively.

 

"Alexei, you *know* that I love you, don't you?"

 

"Yes."

 

"You also know that I want no one but *you* in my bed and my body, right?"

 

"Yes, Walter."

 

"Then trust me and tell me what happened between you two. He made insinuations tonight. I could tell he was trying to cause problems between us. The best way to stop his meddling is if I know what went on."

 

Walter had left the lamp turned up so he could see Alexei as they talked. He watched the play of emotions before his lover spoke. Anger, pain, a little fear.

 

"What did he say?"

 

"He said you tend to lose things, he to find them."

 

The bitterness was easy to hear in the deep voice of the man holding him in a suddenly tight grip.

 

"Promise me you will never accept food or drink from him, or allow yourself to be alone with him."

 

"A promise I give gladly. The man holds no appeal for me. Now tell me why."

 

"I did not come to America alone. I had a lover who came with me. I thought I loved him until you came into my life and I found out what love truly means."

 

"Go on, tell me all of it and take as long as you need."

 

"His name was Nikolai. He was a pretty boy when I first met him. Young but already sure of what he wanted. His family was poor and, looking back, I should have known he was using me. Even then I wanted a stable relationship with just one man."

 

Walter stroked Alexei's ribs as he waited for him to continue.

 

"So when my uncle settled here, he wrote to me of the wealth to be had. I packed us up and brought him here with me. For the first few months, we struggled but then things started to come together. I expected us to be happy then."

 

Walter kissed his partner's throat softly in silent support as he heard more than the words.

 

"I met Mulder through business acquaintances. He is quite charming when he wants to be. Before I knew it, I had agreed to have dinner with him. That dinner was a little strained because he made his desires plain. I of course told him I was with someone. I'm not sure how or why but he convinced me to bring Nikolai for dinner the next night."

 

Walter curved his body around Alexei, already fairly sure where the story was going. His mind was angry that someone would do this to the man he knew to be gentle and loving. But his heart was glad the other man had left so he could have Alexei.

 

"He looked at Nikolai the same way he was looking at you the night he met you. I didn't see it with Nikolai, maybe because I didn't truly love him as I do you. They were seeing each other for a month before I found out."

 

"How did you learn about them?"

 

"Nikolai brought him into my bed. I came home early one day. I could hear him as soon as I opened the door. I moved quietly toward the bedroom, thinking he was pleasuring himself. When I heard slap of a hand on flesh and Mulder's voice ordering him to come, I died a little."

 

"How horrible for you. What did you do?"

 

"You've never seen my temper, pray you never do. I threw him out, his nose dripping blood and Mulder gloating that he now had what he wanted. Nikolai seemed smug. And why not? Mulder has more money than I. He could give him the things he wanted."

 

"Then why was Mulder out alone when we met? And why would he make such obvious advances to me?"

 

"Mulder always wants what he can not have. Once he gets it, he no longer wants it."

 

"But what about Nikolai?"

 

"The next time I saw him he was on some drug, laudanum, I think. Mulder was treating him like a slave and he was accepting it in order to get the drugs. I can't prove it but I think Mulder killed him when he tired of him. The doctor said it was an overdose and assumed he just took too much. But I saw the bruises from the abuse he had suffered before he died."

 

"How? If he was with Mulder?"

 

"He came to me, begging me to help him the day before he died. He told me Mulder was beating him, giving him to other men to use for money. He showed me his wasted body. He was covered in welts, had bruises in the shape of fingers on his thighs and buttocks. He had been used so violently he was torn and bleeding."

 

"What did you do?"

 

"I had the doctor care for his injuries, fed him a decent meal, bathed him and put him to bed. Mulder showed up looking for him about the time the shakes set in. I tried to get him to stay with me but when Mulder issued his command, Nikolai followed him docilely to his carriage. The next day he was dead."

 

"No wonder you don't want me near him. Alexei, you don't need to worry. I want no one but you. I have money so he can't offer me that. Drugs don't appeal. After hearing this, I won't trust anything he offers me."

 

"Promise, me?"

 

"An easy promise to make, Alexei."

 

"I love you as I have loved no one else, Walter. I will kill anyone who tries to come between us."

 

Walter wasn't surprised when Alexei pushed him onto his back and covered his body. His hands were pulled up over his head and held with one hand as the other pinched his nipple. He moaned into the demanding kiss of the man above him.

 

Alexei ground their crotches together, bringing them both quickly erect. Walter raised his legs to wrap around his lover, pulling him closer and increasing the stimulation as their cocks rubbed happily together. His body arched at what looked to be an uncomfortable angle as the hot mouth covered the free nipple.

 

Alexei's tongue danced over Walter's nipple before his teeth bit down. Walter's hiss encouraging him to continue. He had learned early on that Walter's nipples loved to be tortured. Once aroused, he would normally demand to be bitten harder.

 

Alexei let go of both nipples, pulled back and smiled as Walter's body tried to follow him.

 

"Lie still."

 

His order was immediately obeyed. Seeing the two men together, people who knew the ins and outs of such relationships would have assumed Walter to be in control. But Alexei had controlled the relationship from the beginning. A control Walter joyfully gave over to him. Why not? Alexei took him to heights he had never known were possible.

 

"Keep your hands where they are."

 

A slight nod the only response.

 

"Open your legs wide for me."

 

The legs spread wide. Alexei knelt between them and began to torture his lover's cock. One hand stroking as the other rolled the heavy balls in their sac. Walter's hands closed over the top of the headboard. He knew it would be a while before Alexei let him come and he needed an anchor to help him hold on.

 

Alexei played with his lover, watching as he squirmed and moaned under his hands. He never had anyone respond to him as Walter did. It was such a pleasure to watch. Alexei allowed his fingers to slip further back, to rub at the sensitive skin behind the balls.

 

"Please, Alexei!"

 

"Not yet. Not until I say."

 

The knuckles of the hands gripping the bed whitened with the effort to hold on. More than his own pleasure, Walter wanted Alexei's and he knew it pleased his lover to draw it out. The teeth biting into the lower lip drew blood. Alexei leaned down to kiss him, licking the blood from the lip, eliciting another moan from his lover.

 

"Stop doing that. If I want you to bleed, I'll make you bleed." The grin took all threat from the words; the one time he had made Walter bleed, he had been so upset they hadn't had anal sex for almost a week. Even when Walter had asked, he had refused out of fear of re-injuring him.

 

The hands working on him had slowed the assault, giving Walter's body a chance to calm. When Alexei was sure the orgasm was averted, he resumed his former level of play. The fluid that gathered at the slit to begin running down the head was too much temptation for the Russian.

 

Bending down, he cleaned the head with his tongue before pulling it into his mouth to suck oh, so gently. Walter's hips bucked upward trying to push more of him inside his tormentor's mouth. Alexei was having none of that. He let his toys go to hold the hips in place. Sucking at just the tip, drawing more of the salty fluid into his mouth.

 

Walter was very close to losing it when the hot mouth let him go, making a loud slurping sound. He gasped with the suddenness of the cooler air hitting his wet cock. Then wailed with frustration.

 

"Alexeiiiiii!"

 

The slap of a hand on his thigh all the reminder he needed as to who was in charge.

 

Walter closed his eyes, whimpering as he waited. Seeing Alexei kneeling between his legs, his rampant cock twitching slightly with his breathing was adding too much stimuli to Walter's already overloaded senses.

 

"Soon, beloved, soon."

 

Walter raised his legs willingly as Alexei's hands slipped under his knees. The slick fingers welcomed and almost sucked inside when they began to probe. The cock arched up against to facilitate the impaling. The harsh whimpers becoming an almost crying sound as Alexei rammed into him hard and fast.

 

Walter's legs wrapping tightly around the slender hips, pulling him in as deeply as possible. Alexei's hands underneath, gripping the firm ass of his lover, pulling him up to meet his thrusts and keeping him spread wide to penetrate with every inch he had to offer.

 

Walter was hanging by a thread, sweat beading his face and body. Alexei watched his face as he took his pleasure in the body. The small Mona Lisa smile betraying his joy in taking Walter so far out of himself. The smile widened when the pleases started flowing.

 

"Please, please, please, Alexei, please let me come!"

 

"Hold on, for me. Just a little longer. Almost there."

 

Alexei bent down, the angle making for less power to his thrusts but putting him where he could suck a nipple into his mouth. When he felt the spasms of the ass his cock was buried inside, he said one word.

 

"Now!"

 

The teeth latched onto one nipple as fingers twisted the other. Walter's scream loud enough to rouse the house if they hadn't been used to hearing Alexei make the big man scream. Alexei felt Walter's cock twitching against him and the hot sperm flowing between their bodies.

 

Alexei bit down harder, pumped into the tight ass a few more times, then his come shot high inside his man. Walter forgot he was supposed to keep his hands above his head and gripped Alexei's ass as if to pull him farther inside his body.

 

Both men gripped each other harder for several long minutes as they rode out the aftershocks. When Alexei went boneless on Walter's chest, he wrapped his arms around his sated lover and held him gently.

 

++++++++

 

The next time he woke, he could focus a little better. He was lying on a rough blanket and the floor looked like packed dirt. Twisting his head caused a sharp pain to shoot through it, his vision blurred, and he retched weakly but nothing came up. He realized that at some point he had lost control, the blanket he was lying on was wet and he could smell his feces.

 

He groaned, his pain aggravated by his lack of knowledge as to where he was and how long it had been. Fear kicked in as well, fear for his lover. Was he in a similar state or had he been killed? That thought brought tears to his face. Whatever happened to him would not matter if the man he loved were gone. And what if he were still alive but not imprisoned? If that were the case, he would be frantic with worry.

 

One more pain to add to all the others. He retched again as the tears flowed down his face. The blackness was welcomed when it came since it stopped all his pains and thoughts for a while.

 

++++++++++

 

By the time Alexei and Walter had known each other for a year, the relationship had settled into the closest thing to a marriage two men could have. Walter had given up his rooms near the shipyard since he never used them anyway, moving into Alexei's home.

 

Walter's family accepted his explanation that Alexei's home was just as convenient to his work and much more comfortable. Since the two men were so very discreet in public and Walter didn't need to provide heirs, they saw no reason to look deeper at the relationship. Both men managed their businesses as before and even made a greater success of them.

 

Alexei's family had always known of his preferences, and since he didn't draw unwanted attention to them, they ignored them. Besides, he provided their income and they didn't want to do anything to lose that. His cousin was the most accepting because he had been a brother to her and she saw how happy he was with his new life in America.

 

After the second time Walter had run into Mulder and Alexei's temper had shown itself to him, he had stopped telling him about the seemingly 'chance' meetings. Not a week went by that Mulder wasn't somewhere he was. He did his best to ignore the man but it was very difficult.

 

The innuendoes were bad enough, but when no one was close enough to hear he made plain his intentions. Asking Walter out for dinner or drinks or plays. Walter's refusals to go out with him seemed no deterrent at all. As the months progressed, he became more and more aggressive in his suggestions. Even telling Walter what he wanted to do to him. Walter told him on every occasion that he was not interested.

 

They were both very surprised to see Mulder's face at the one-year anniversary party for Daniel and Katya. His presence discomforting to Walter, who feared he would say the wrong thing and set Alexei off. For Alexei's part, he was furious to see the hated man at a family celebration.

 

After dinner, the guests split up, some retiring to the library, some to dance in the ballroom. Walter was standing near the terrace doors, watching the dancers as he waited for Alexei to finish the dance with his cousin. He loved watching the man dance, the fluid movements so graceful. Watching him move that way made Walter long for the evening to be over so he could enjoy those movements in their bed.

 

Mulder's voice made the hair at the back of his neck stand on end.

 

"Hello, Walter, nice to see you again. Alexei and his cousin dance well together, don't they?"

 

Walter had no intention of causing a scene in his brother's home so he answered far more politely than usual.

 

"They learned to dance together as children."

 

"Does he move that well when he rides you?"

 

Walter's temper was being sorely tested. He ground his teeth together before spitting out his answer to the man beside him.

 

"I have told you before my relationship with Alexei is none of your business. I would be most appreciative if you would stay away from me."

 

Walter found his arm gripped by a strong hand and he was pulled through the door onto the terrace. At that point he still felt he could control the situation. It didn't occur to him that the madman might be stronger than he was.

 

He found himself pushed past the doors and into a corner behind the planter. The only light penetrating was the moonlight. Alexei did not witness this as Mulder had timed it to the dance steps, waiting for Alexei's back to be turned.

 

When Mulder's mouth came down on his, Walter tried to push the other man away. The strength of the man surprised him as his arm was twisted painfully behind his back. The mouth moved against his, tongue pressing for an entrance, which Walter firmly denied it.

 

When the hand closed over his cock, Walter bucked trying to push the man away with his body. Mulder seemed to take this, not as the bid for release it was but as response. He squeezed down almost painfully on Walter's cock before moving his hand farther down to fondle the balls. Releasing Walter's mouth, he spoke quietly.

 

"I can give you everything he can and more. Nikolai told me I have *much* more to offer than Alexei."

 

As if to offer proof, he let go of Walter's balls and ground his crotch against him. Walter could feel the erection and could tell that Mulder was indeed longer than Alexei, although he didn't feel as wide. If he were the kind of man only looking for sex, he might have been tempted.

 

But Walter was in love and very pleased with his love life with Alexei. Even if he hadn't made a commitment to the green-eyed beauty, he wouldn't want this crazy man.

 

"Mulder, stop this. I'm very much in love and want no one else. I will never want anyone but Alexei. Now let me go before he comes looking for us."

 

"Are you afraid of him? Don't want him to see you in another man's arms?"

 

"I have no reason to be afraid *with him*. Now let go. I want no trouble on Daniel and Katya's night."

 

"You heard him, Fox. Let him go."

 

Mulder stepped back and turned to face the furious Russian. Walter moved quickly around him to stand at Alexei's side.

 

"What's the matter, Alexei? Afraid you'll lose another lover to me?"

 

Alexei moved so quickly, Walter had no chance to try and stop him. The fist connected and Mulder went down. Alexei followed, intent on bashing the man's brains out against the stone of the terrace. Walter reached him before he could carry out his intended action. Holding tightly to him, Walter pulled him down from the terrace and around the house, praying that no one would see him dragging his struggling lover away from the man he wished to kill.

 

They reached the drive. Alexei's driver, seeing the men struggling ran forward, a question on his lips. Walter knew enough Russian by then to answer the man. His response was accepted without question. The driver ran forward to help Walter get the still enraged Alexei into the carriage.

 

Once inside, Walter kept him there by literally sitting on him. The carriage pulled out of the drive heading toward home as Mulder ran to catch them. Walter's concerns would have been focused in another direction if he had seen the mad gleam in the eyes as the trickle of blood was lapped from a lip by a pink tongue.

 

All the way home Walter talked to his lover in low soothing tones. Bringing him out of the red anger. Then telling him again that he loved him, would never leave him, not for anyone but especially not for Fox Mulder.

 

By the time they arrived at their home, Alexei had calmed but his mood had changed. As if he needed to mark his territory, he took Walter with a violence that ripped Walter's soul from his body. He broke him into tiny pieces then put them back together. The orgasm roaring through Walter's body the most intense he had ever had. The aftershocks leaving him trembling.

 

In the aftermath, Walter held Alexei as he cried and repeated over and over how sorry he was. When Alexei fell into an exhausted sleep, Walter eased out of the bed. He washed his body in the guestroom, inspecting the bite marks and bruises. There was no blood; a year of having Alexei in his body almost daily had taught it to accept his use.

 

Once he was cleaned up and sure Alexei would find no blood in their bed in the morning, he went back to their room. He stood watching the man who owned his heart sleep until he began to twist and whimper. Walter hurried to crawl into bed next to him and pull him close. The nightmare averted as soon as Walter touched him.

 

Walter woke alone the next morning and when he went downstairs, he found Alexei sitting with a distant look on his face. He turned his head when Walter tried to kiss him so that it landed on his cheek.

 

"If you want to leave, I'll understand. I won't try to stop you. What I did last night was unforgivable."

 

"What you did last night was take me someplace I never knew existed."

 

Alexei's head rose to look at Walter in shock.

 

"Alexei, I will *never* leave you. You own me as surely as if I were a slave. Last night, you were angry. Someone who has stolen from you before tried to do it again. I stopped you from doing what your mind and heart wanted to do. When we got home, you took what is *yours* to take."

 

"I hurt you. I heard the pain in your voice and I didn't stop."

 

"Had I asked, you would have."

 

"You don't know that."

 

"Yes, Alexei, I do." The answer firm and sure.

 

"How can you?" The question whispered brokenly.

 

"Because you love me as you have loved no other."

 

"How can you say that? After what I did."

 

"Because I know it to be true."

 

Alexei's hand rose slowly and he traced the lip he had bitten until it had bled the night before. His words harsh with his fear.

 

"I made you bleed. I promised I'd never do that again."

 

"That's the only place I bled. And it wouldn't have happened if my body hadn't picked that moment to explode. Didn't you look at the sheets before you left me this morning? There's no blood on them."

 

He didn't add that he would have figured out some way to change them if there had been.

 

"Yes, I looked. I also saw all the marks I left on you."

 

"You often leave marks on me. It pleases me to wear your marks. I thought it pleased you as well."

 

Walter's tone and look that of someone about to lose something important. Walter had never told Alexei he liked the marks on his body. Alexei had sometimes found him rubbing at the darker ones with a smile on his lips, so he had assumed that Walter didn't mind.

 

The cold that had settled on Alexei when he had opened his eyes that morning was suddenly gone. For the first time he was at a loss for words so he pulled the big man down next to him and locating an unblemished spot on his neck began to suck. Walter's big hands closed gently around his lover's head holding him close as he was marked once more.

 

After that, the two men had a new understanding of each other. Alexei came to relish the nights when Walter's voice would encourage him to be rough. Walter's pleasure in being so thoroughly used was beyond his ability to express, although his complete surrender to Alexei spoke volumes.

 

As the days and weeks passed, Walter began to think Mulder had finally gotten the point.

 

Though the chance meetings had stopped, Walter didn't even notice that he was being watched almost constantly.

 

Mulder, in his insanity, had fixated on having Walter. In his twisted mind, Alexei had stolen Walter and he was going to get him back. All he needed was to get him alone, he reasoned, and he could win him back. So he arranged to have Walter spied upon. A man with money could hire people for almost any plan he had in mind.

 

He also arranged for a house he could hold him prisoner in once he had lured him away. But that had proven hard to do. He had sent a messenger with the news that Walter was urgently needed at his brother's. Alexei had gone with him, which averted the plan to take him.

 

After that attempt backfired, Walter seemed to become more cautious, or else Alexei did. It didn't much matter, the result was the same. A big Russian recent émigré named Ivan began to accompany Walter everywhere. The only times Ivan wasn't at Walter's side Alexei was.

 

+++++++++++++++

 

The next time he woke, he was on a different blanket and he had been cleaned up. There was water in a bowl next to him and he lapped it up eagerly to soothe his dry throat. This time his mind stayed clear longer. He still couldn't remember exactly what had happened but he had no doubt that Mulder was behind it. There was no one else who would want to harm them.

 

He wondered again where his lover was and prayed he was safe. But somehow he doubted that he was.

 

+++++++++++++++

 

They had been together for over a year when Alex suggested the play. It was a revival of She Stoops to Conquer by Oliver Goldsmith. It was several years old and had been considered quite risqué when originally produced. Just the kind of thing he knew his lover would enjoy.

 

They had gone out to dinner first, enjoying each other's company over the fine meal. Alexei had told the driver he could go home. The distance home not far, the weather pleasant and he and Walter enjoyed going for walks together.

 

They were a few blocks from home, still laughing over the play, when Alexei was hit from behind. He went down and Walter immediately turned to help him only to be hit hard across the temple.

 

He woke disoriented and cold. It didn't take long for him to realize he was bound and naked. He lay still, trying to remember what had happened and how he came to be here. His last memory was of his lover walking next to him as they had left the play they had gone to see.

 

His head was pounding and he was finding it difficult to think. He tried to curl into a tight ball to conserve body heat. His heart cried out his lover's name as he slipped back into the blackness.

 

The next time he woke, he could focus a little better. He was lying on a rough blanket and the floor looked like packed dirt. Twisting his head caused a sharp pain to shoot through it, his vision blurred, and he retched weakly but nothing came up. He realized that at some point he had lost control, the blanket he was lying on was wet and he could smell his feces.

 

He groaned, his pain aggravated by his lack of knowledge as to where he was and how long it had been. Fear kicked in as well, fear for his lover. Was he in a similar state or had he been killed? That thought brought tears to his face. Whatever happened to him would not matter if the man he loved were gone. And what if he was still alive but not imprisoned? If that were the case, he would be frantic with worry.

 

One more pain to add to all the others. He retched again as the tears flowed down his face. The blackness was welcomed when it came since it stopped all his pains and thoughts for a while.

 

Once more he woke to find he was on a different blanket and he had been cleaned up. There was water in a bowl next to him and he lapped it up eagerly to soothe his dry throat. This time his mind stayed clear longer. He still couldn't remember exactly what had happened but he had no doubt that Mulder was behind it. There was no one else who would want to harm them.

 

He wondered again where his lover was and prayed he was safe. But somehow he doubted that he was.

 

He opened his eyes sometime later to see Fox Mulder sitting on the steps of the cellar. Fox looked at him closely, waiting to see signs of comprehension.

 

"Ah… Welcome back, Walter."

 

"Alexei will kill you for this."

 

"He will have to find us first. That is, if he isn't dead. But if so, by the time he finds us, you will be mine and you'll tell him to go away."

 

"Never! I would rather die than belong to you."

 

Mulder was up and across the floor so quickly Walter had no time to brace himself. The backhanded blow rocked his head back into the wall. His chin was gripped hard as Mulder spit into his face.

 

"Be careful, Walter. I *will* make you hurt if you anger me again."

 

His chin was released and Mulder stalked across the floor to disappear up the steps. The ill treatment brought back the blurred vision and the sick stomach. Walter retched feebly as tears leaked from his eyes. He prayed then as never before. Prayers for his lover to be alive, for the strength to endure until Alexei would find him.

 

Most of all he prayed that Alexei would still want him when Mulder was through with what he was sure would happen.

 

The world grayed out again. He woke to the feel of rough hands turning him. He bit down hard on his lip to stop the scream as he was roughly entered. He tried to escape into his mind as the man rutted and panted above him. The pain so far beyond expectation. After all, he had been in Alexei's bed for over a year.

 

It never occurred to him that Alexei made sure he suffered no pain. Alexei wanted only pleasure for Walter in his bed. Mulder wanted to dominate him, to own him. Mulder cared only for his own pleasure. His madness had taken over.

 

Walter groaned as Mulder pulled out of him.

 

"You're bleeding. Guess Nikolai was telling the truth about me being more man than Alexei."

 

Walter kept quiet although his mind wanted to scream at Mulder that he would never be the man Alexei was. He lay still as Mulder cleaned him. Thankful that he would not be lying in a pool of Mulder's come mixed with his blood.

 

Mulder left him alone. And he prayed again.

 

+++++++++++++++++

 

Alexei had spent a week in a near coma. His driver had found him near dawn of the next morning. Shivering, wet, and rambling. They had no idea where Walter was but knew he would not have left Alexei in that state had he been in control.

 

Walter's brother and nephew searched for him. Arthur came to the house every day to check on Alexei, hoping he was aware enough to give them some information.

 

Katya and Daniel had moved into the guestroom temporarily so that she could watch over her cousin during the day. Daniel made no comment about the fact that his uncle's clothing was not in the guestroom but in the master bedroom next to Alexei's. It merely confirmed what he had suspected.

 

Daniel loved his uncle. Walter had been the one to play games with him. Had taken him fishing and hunting. All things his father was too wrapped up in business to do. If Alexei made his uncle happy and they continued to be discreet, he would not interfere.

 

The morning Alexei woke and knew it was Katya beside his bed, they all sighed with relief. Alexei however felt no relief.

 

"Where is Walter?"

 

"We don't know, Alexei. Arthur and Daniel have been hoping you would have some idea."

 

Alexei threw the covers back and tried to struggle to his feet. He was unmindful of the fact that he was stark naked. His cousin had seen him before and he needed to look for Walter.

 

Daniel entered the room to find Katya trying to get Alexei to lie back down.

 

"Alexei, please. You aren't well. You must rest."

 

Daniel moved quickly to push the still weak man back down.

 

"Katya is right, Alexei. You must regain your strength."

 

Alexei was too weak to push Daniel away. He moaned as he dropped back to the bed. Katya covered him before ringing for the servants.

 

"How long?"

 

"A week. Do you have any idea where he could be? My father is frantic. We all are. It's not like Uncle Walter to make us worry. Unless…"

 

"What?"

 

"I can not pretend I haven't figured out that you are more than my uncle's friend. His clothes are in the wardrobe next to yours. His possessions lie next to yours on the dresser. Did you quarrel? Fight? Has he left you?"

 

"No! We were coming home from the play. We were even laughing at the dialogue from the play when I was hit from behind. That's the last thing I remember until waking to see Katya's worried face."

 

"I believe you. Do you know where he might be? We thought possibly he was kidnapped but no ransom has been demanded."

 

"He has been kidnapped, I have no doubt. But not for ransom."

 

"What do you mean?"

 

"I think if you check, you will find that Fox Mulder dropped out of sight the night we were attacked."

 

"What are you saying?"

 

Katya spoke suddenly.

 

"Alexei, he…God, no." the last was an anguished whisper.

 

"What? Tell me." Daniel looked from one to the other, seeing fear in two sets of green eyes.

 

"Alexei brought a lover here with him from Russia. Mulder seduced him away. Gave him drugs. We think he killed him when he tired of him."

 

Daniel had enough of his uncle in him not to waste time asking questions he didn't need the answers for.

 

"Alexei, you rest and let Katya get some food into you. If Mulder has taken Uncle Walter, you'll need your strength. I'll go see if I can find Mulder. If he is indeed missing, then we'll assume he is connected to this."

 

Daniel looked at Alexei, seeing the rage there. He made plans of another sort as he strode out of the house. The rage in Alexei's eyes told him that if Mulder had indeed taken his uncle, once he was found, Mulder would die.

 

By the end of the day, Daniel had arranged for one of their ships to be outfitted for a journey. Mulder was a powerful man and he knew Alexei and his uncle would have to leave the country once he had been killed. He had no doubt Alexei would kill him. Hell, Daniel would help him do it if necessary.

 

A trial would be out of the question. Alexei and Walter's relationship could not become public knowledge. Since that would be the only hope for an acquittal, Daniel made other plans.

 

When he reached the house, he went straight to Alexei's room.

 

"You were right. Mulder hasn't been seen since the day of your attack. I have people searching for him. I offered to pay for information so I hope we will hear something soon."

 

Again Alexei tried to leave his bed and again Daniel pushed him back.

 

"Alexei, listen to me. You can't just run out into the night looking for him. You need to get healthy. Let me find him. Then we will go after my uncle."

 

"You don't understand!"

 

"I understand that if you go off and waste energy, when the time comes, you won't be able to take care of my uncle. He's strong, Alexei. He will survive."

 

"Physically, but…"

 

"Mentally, as well. Have faith in him. I made arrangements as soon as I found out Mulder was missing. A ship will be ready to take you both away from here after it's done."

 

"Done?"

 

"After you kill Mulder."

 

Alexei looked into Daniel's eyes and saw no distaste, just knowledge. Alexei slowly nodded.

 

"Pray that we find him soon."

 

"We will. Bribes are wonderful things."

 

++++++++++++

 

By that time, Mulder had raped Walter so many times he had lost count. Mulder had begun putting laudanum in the wine he gave him. Walter knew he was being drugged but it was the only drink he was given. Besides, it helped the pain of being so roughly used on the hard packed floor. It also made him sleep between the rapes.

 

His knees and elbows were bruised so deeply it would take months for the discoloration to go away. His wrists were rubbed raw from the ropes, which bound them. His anus was swollen and raw looking but Mulder neither cared nor seemed to notice. The rest of his body was beginning to show the effects of his enforced fasting.

 

He kept as quiet as possible during the rapes. He didn't want to give Mulder anything, not even his pain. The drugs helped him hide in his head. He could slip into a sleep populated only with the happy times with his lover.

 

Now and then, Mulder talked to him, but he paid no attention except when hit. He would pay attention only long enough to give a response. Since the first time he had told Mulder that Alexei would kill him, he had not mentioned Alexei again.

 

He did not want to anger Mulder. He had to keep things as calm as possible. He had to give Alexei time to find him. He refused to believe Alexei was dead. Refused to allow himself to think that. Somehow he just *knew* that Alexei would come for him.

 

++++++++++++++++++++

 

Alexei had regained enough of his strength to start looking for Walter himself. Nights, he along with Arthur and Daniel would gather at his house to compare any sliver of knowledge they had received during the day. Other than Daniel making plans for them to leave the country and his assumption that Alexei would kill Mulder, he had made no further reference to the relationship. Arthur, too was quiet on the subject.

 

They were still at the dinner table when the servant came to tell them that a man was there with news of Mulder. Alexei rose so quickly he overturned his chair. He was in the entry hall with the man before Arthur, Daniel, and Katya even made it out of the dinning room.

 

"What do you know, man. Tell me!"

 

"Wait, I heard there was a reward for news. I want to see the money first."

 

Alexei grabbed the man and shook him hard. "Tell me where he is, damn you!"

 

Daniel grabbed Alexei, pulling him back as he temporally lost his English and began cursing in Russian. Arthur moved toward the man with a calmer air than he felt. Due to their age difference, he had not been as close to his brother as some but he was family and dearly loved and respected.

 

"I'm Arthur Skinner. I assure you I will give you the reward we have promised. For now, all I can give you are the coins I have on me."

 

Arthur reached into his coat coming out with a purse and emptied it in the man's hands. The man hurriedly counted it, finding it to be a goodly sum.

 

"I was there the night Mulder took your brother. He promised me a larger purse for helping him. He was to meet me last night but he never showed up."

 

"Where does he have my brother?"

 

"I'll take you as soon as you get me the rest of the reward."

 

Alexei screamed, "Ni khuya, Svoloch."

 

It was all Daniel could do to keep him away from the man. Katya called her cousin's name, begging him in Russian to calm down before he scared the man away.

 

"Wait here."

 

Arthur turned to help drag Alexei into the sitting room.

 

"Alexei, I would have to be blind not to know that you care for my brother. But you need to calm down. If you drive this man away, we may never find Walter."

 

Alexei looked at Arthur and finally nodded. Arthur returned to the entry and led the man into the small parlor on the other side of the entry. Serving him a glass of brandy, he went back to write a message for Daniel to take to his banker.

 

Alexei paced as they waited for Daniel to return with the money. Katya stayed with him in the sitting room and Arthur kept an eye on the informant. By the time Daniel returned from his hasty trip around half the city, it was near to midnight.

 

The trip to the cabin took most of the night. At the informant's insistence, they had given him a horse and as soon as they were in sight of the cabin, he wheeled around and left them.

 

"Daniel, I want you to wait here. I will call you when it's done."

 

"I'll go with you, Alexei. He's my uncle. I want to help."

 

"Daniel, it's better if you aren't there. What you do not see will never haunt you."

 

"You mean I can't witness against you."

 

"You would not do that. Not when you feel the man deserves to die, as well. Now please wait until I call."

 

Alexei approached the cabin carefully. He wanted Mulder to have as little warning as possible. When he slammed into the cabin, he found Mulder sleeping. He was on him in a flash with the knife at his throat.

 

"Where is he?"

 

"Who? My new lover?"

 

"He'll never be yours. Tell me where he is."

 

"He doesn't want you anymore. Just like Nikolai, he has learned what I have to offer. More than you could give him."

 

The knife flashed and Mulder's ear landed with a plop on the floor beside the bed. The scream was more rage than pain as Mulder reared up, dislodging Alexei from his chest. The two men rolled together on the floor, struggling for the knife and dominance.

 

Alexei was still recovering but he had the rage of a lover fighting for his mate. Mulder sustained as many bruises as he gave but in the end, Alexei was kneeling, holding Mulder's arms down with his knees as he once more placed the knife to a throat.

 

"I ask for the last time. Where is Walter?"

 

"He's in the cellar. But he won't go with you. He's mine now. Just as Nikolai was."

 

"You will steal from no one else in this life."

 

The knife caught the early morning sun coming through the open door. Mulder's throat opened like an overripe melon. His blood poured out as he gurgled his last breath. Alexei rose to look down at him watching as the light left the eyes.

 

When he knew Mulder was dead, he walked to the door and whistled for his carriage. By the time Daniel and the driver arrived, he was at the bottom of the cellar steps, his eyes seeking his lover in the near darkness.

 

Walter had been in the cellar for almost two weeks when he heard the voice he loved so well. He swam up through the most recent dose of drugs to see Alexei's worried face over him. To Daniel's voice asking if he were still alive.

 

"Walter! Walter, talk to me. Look at me!"

 

"Is it really you?"

 

His voice sounded rusty even to him. But then he had not used it much in the last few days.

 

"Yes, it is. We're going to get you out of here. Daniel, help me."

 

The knife Alexei had used on Mulder was still wet with his blood as Alexei used it to cut through the ropes on Walter's wrists. Walter barely registered the bundle of clothing on the cabin floor, a wet red pooling around it as Alexei and Daniel carried him through to the outside.

 

"Goddamn you, Mulder! Had I seen him first, you would have suffered before you died."

 

The sunlight blinded Walter after so many days in almost complete darkness. The carriage ride swift and painful. Alexei held him wrapped in a blanket and Daniel looked on with concern. Walter roused enough to realize they were taking him onto a ship. But he was asleep again before his body was arranged on the bunk.

 

Katya was waiting for them. She gasped when she saw Walter's condition. Daniel's hand touched Alexei's arm.

 

"I'll go for a doctor. Why don't you get him cleaned up a little? Let Katya help you. I'll hurry."

 

Alexei and Katya washed Walter's frail-looking body. Katya had tears running down her face to see this strong man so ill-used. Alexei looked grim as he saw each new mark, each new wound. Turning him onto his stomach the marks from the cane were revealed. Katya swayed and Alexei gripped her quickly and made her sit in a chair.

 

Alexei's ministrations were as gentle as possible but Walter still moaned in spite of the drugs in his system. The bruising was so deep that Alexei knew it would be a long time before Walter healed. When he parted Walter's ass cheeks to clean him, his voice broke as he cursed in Russian.

 

He had been sure that Mulder had raped Walter but the extent of the damage was still difficult to see. Walter's anus was bright red with bruising all around. There was still blood, some looking recently dried, some dark and flaking off.

 

There were fingerprint marks on Walter's hips as well as his buttocks. There was even a small infected tear where the crack of his buttocks began. Alexei could only assume that Mulder had inflicted that injury by pulling Walter open violently. Walter roused enough to whimper while Alexei thoroughly cleaned the tear.

 

By the time Daniel returned with the doctor, Walter was clean and covered with a blanket to keep him warm. Katya had gone home in the carriage at Alexei's insistence. He did not like exposing her to such horrors and knew the doctor's examination would be difficult enough without worrying about her. She had just found out that she was with child and he wanted to risk no problems for her.

 

The doctor asked that they wait outside but Alexei refused. Finally, with a shake of his head, the doctor pulled back the blanket and began his examination of the patient. Walter roused enough to cry out when the doctor probed at his anus.

 

Had Daniel not been present, the doctor would have needed a doctor. Daniel hustled him out and left Alexei to soothe his uncle. The report he brought back was not encouraging.

 

"The doctor fears he may not survive, Alexei. He says that the bruising may have caused damage internally that will not heal. And if he heals, he may never have normal function again."

 

"*He*...*Will*… *Survive*. I will not lose him. I will care for him. He *will* get well."

 

The steel in Alexei's voice left no room for doubt. Daniel looked into the flashing green eyes, and knowing his uncle as he did, was sure that they would get past this.

 

"I believe you. I need to go, tell my father he is here. The doctor suggested that you keep him on the drugs until his body has healed somewhat. The withdrawal will be difficult. He said it will take about three days. He'll be nauseated, have chills, and sweats."

 

"I know. I've seen it before. Will you bring more drugs when you come back with your father? Also he will need broth. We need to get some food into him."

 

"I'll see to it. I'll have one of the men go and get broth now."

 

Daniel turned to leave but turned back at the last minute to see Alexei tenderly wiping sweat from his uncle's face.

 

"Alexei, Mulder got what he deserved."

 

"No, Daniel, he deserved far more than he got. But it's too late now."

 

After Daniel left, Alexei eased down beside Walter. He held him close and allowed the tears he could not shed in front of the others to flow down his face. He had spoken brave words but he had seen the damage done to his lover and he feared the worse.

 

If Walter died, Katya would become wealthy because Alexei would follow his lover and she was his heir. But that was not the only fear in his heart. He was afraid that Walter would never be himself again and the idea of that was even harder to bear.

 

Walter's eyes fluttered open and he croaked quietly.

 

"Alexei, is it really you? Or am I just dreaming again?"

 

"Not a dream, love. I'm here and you're safe. Mulder is dead. He can never hurt you again."

 

"I told him you would kill him. He really thought he could make me stop loving you."

 

"Try to rest until your broth comes, Walter. I will watch over you."

 

Walter nodded and Alexei thought he had gone back to sleep.

 

"Love you, Alexei, only you. I'm sorry I'm dirty now."

 

"Hush, love. That isn't true. What was done against your will does not make you dirty – it makes him dirty. Now, rest."

 

Walter dropped back into the darkness, reassured that Alexei was with him and didn't blame him. When the broth was brought, he managed to get about half of it down before sleep overcame him again. He didn't even rouse when Daniel and Arthur came by later.

 

Arthur had looked stricken at Walter's appearance. He had softly touched his brother's arm before muttering a gruff "Thank you" to Alexei.

 

Alexei held Walter through the night, dozing fitfully. With the morning came pain. The drugs had worn off enough for Walter to feel and he lay groaning.

 

Alexei struggled up from sleep, stumbling to get to the bottle Daniel had brought back the night before. He filled a cup with water and brought the two items to the bed.

 

"No, Alexei. I don't want that. I want to be clear headed. I need to know you still love me."

 

"I will never stop loving you, Walter. Nothing that was done to you changes how I feel about you. Now, please, take the laudanum. It will help your pain. Your body needs to heal before you wean from it. I promise when your body is better, we'll get rid of the drug."

 

"Only a little. I want to know I'm with you and not in a dream."

 

"I understand. Drink and I'll get you some broth. I hope you can eat more than last night."

 

Over the next few days they fell into a routine. Walter refusing the drugs until the pain was unbearable. Eating as much as he could every time Alexei offered him food. Alexei spent long hours bathing Walter to clean the sweat from his body.

 

At the end of the first week, Walter insisted he needed to try and walk, even if it was just to the door of the cabin. Alexei had just settled him back on the bunk and was cleaning the sweat even that small exertion had brought when there was a knock at the door. Alexei opened it to find Daniel, Arthur and Katya in the passageway.

 

"They're looking for me, aren't they?"

 

"Yes. We've told the Captain that the ship must leave on the next tide. He's sent for the men who are off duty."

 

It was the first time Walter had been awake when his brother and nephew had been there. He looked at his brother expecting rejection but saw none. Arthur perched on the side of the narrow bunk.

 

"Walter, I've arranged for you to have access to money when you need it. Alexei has the letters of credit plus whatever arrangements he made on his own. I wish you didn't have to go but we see no other way. Short of letting Alexei be hanged for what he did."

 

"I know, Arthur. It would ruin the family if what I am came out. Do you hate me?"

 

"You're my brother, Walter. I could never hate my blood. In my eyes, Alexei put down a rabid animal. No human does to another what he did to you. But the law will not see it that way. I wish you a safe journey and a happy life. I know you'll have love."

 

Arthur leaned forward and did something he had not done since Walter had been a small boy: he kissed his cheek. He rose hurriedly and headed to the door without looking back. Katya moved forward and kissed Walter as well then, turning, hugged her cousin as the tears rolled down both their cheeks. Daniel managed to keep his face straight as he hugged his uncle.

 

Then he pulled Katya from Alexei and toward the door. Katya looked back one last time. Her last sight of them Alexei being held tightly by Walter. When they reached the deck, the ropes were being loosened and as soon as Daniel and Katya reached the dock the gangplank was pulled in.

 

The days at sea were good for Walter. They gave him time to heal with no distractions. Alexei watched over him and waited. One morning when Walter awoke, he refused the drug.

 

"I need to stop taking that, Alexei. It's time for me to get it out of my system. Besides, I think it is slowing my recovery. I need to get out of this bed before my muscles waste away."

 

"Walter, I'm not sure if you're ready."

 

"How much is left?"

 

Alexei opened the trunk and pulled out the two full bottles that were left and the bottle he had opened two days before. Walter pulled himself up from the bed and opened the porthole.

 

"Walter, what if…?"

 

"I'll just have to get through it. You'll help me. Please, Alexei. It's the right thing to do and I won't be strong enough if it is here on the ship. We need to do it before we reach land or I may never break free of it. I don't want to be another Nikolai."

 

The last words had more effect than any others.

 

"I'll help you, Walter. I want you well."

 

Alexei passed the bottles to Walter and he pitched them out into the sea.

 

"Now did the doctor tell you how my body will react without the drug?"

 

"Nausea, sweating, chills, and the pain will be back."

 

"Guess you better feed me now before it starts. It's for the best, Alexei. Your love will get me through it."

 

Alexei nodded and left the cabin to go get food for Walter. A crewman followed him back carrying two buckets. One empty, one filled with water. Walter ate as much as he could hold and then Alexei took the tray away. He didn't want the sight or smells from the food to upset Walter.

 

When he returned, Walter was curled into a ball on the bunk.

 

"Walter, the pain?"

 

"Yes. Come and hold me. Talk to me about our future."

 

"Whatever you need, Walter."

 

Alexei eased onto the narrow bunk, wrapping his arms around his lover. He began to spin a tale of the life they would have when they reached the Caribbean. Arthur had been seeking to get a toehold into the spice trade there and now his brother could do that for the family. The letters of credit Arthur had given them would help get them started. Alexei had brought enough of his own money to get them set up in a home.

 

He told Walter of the other arrangements that Arthur and Daniel had been working on before they sailed. Daniel and Katya would be moving into Alexei's house. Any servants who wished would be given passage on the next southbound ship to join Alexei and Walter. Those wishing to stay would have employment with Daniel and Katya. Daniel would be taking over Alexei's business and a cousin was being brought in to learn Walter's old responsibilities.

 

Alexei stopped talking when he thought Walter had gone to sleep.

 

"Sounds like you and my brother thought of everything. Think they might come visit us someday?"

 

"Who knows? Maybe someday. I thought you had gone to sleep."

 

"Hurts too much. I hate him."

 

"I know. But he can never hurt us again."

 

"If you need to find someone else to take care of your needs, I'll understand."

 

"What? Where did that come from? Right now all that matters is that you are alive and you will get better."

 

"But you are a virile man, Alexei. You have needs. I don't know when or if I will ever be able to take care of them for you."

 

"Walter, I know we have exchanged no vows. But I thought you understood that I would make marriage vows to you if it were possible. *If* it should happen that you can never be with me that way again, I will adjust. I'm not with you for sex alone. I'm with you because I love you. Because you make me laugh. You keep me warm when the weather is cold."

 

"I know you love me but sex is a strong drive for a man. You should not do without because I can not function."

 

"I believe you will again someday. But even if you never can, I won't stop loving you and I won't take another to my bed. I've had the ultimate pleasure in you. No one could compete with that. So why should I waste my time?"

 

"If you change your mind, I won't complain."

 

Alexei sighed against the head resting on his chest. He wished Mulder had never laid eyes on Walter. He knew that only time would show Walter the truth. After all, they had only been together for just over a year, not long enough for Walter to have learned just how deep his loyalties went.

 

"I won't change my mind. Try and rest, love."

 

Alexei dredged up an old Russian lullaby and sang as Walter finally dropped into a fitful sleep. Alexei eventually slept as well.

 

Sometime later, he woke to the sounds of Walter's pain. They were both drenched with sweat. Walter was moaning as his body shook. It had started – the withdrawal.

 

Since Walter was shaking, Alexei pulled the blanket close wrapping it around them both. He was sweltering but Walter's teeth were almost chattering. He held him until Walter pushed him away fighting to get out of the nest of blankets.

 

"Hot! It hurts, Alexei. Everything hurts."

 

"I know, Walter."

 

Alexei scrambled out of the bed landing badly on one knee. He pulled himself up and wet a cloth. Walter winced as Alexei worked to cool his body. He had barely gotten Walter cooled down when the nausea racked his body. Thankfully he had little to come up and the retching didn't last long.

 

Alexei was grateful when Walter passed out. He used the time to get himself clean and replace the buckets. He asked a crewman to sit with Walter so he could eat. He didn't want to bring food into the cabin and maybe set off another round of dry heaves.

 

Part of him felt guilty for leaving Walter but he knew he had to eat to have the strength his lover would need from him. When he returned, the crewman had wrapped the blankets back around the shivering man.

 

The next three days were the longest of their lives. Walter at times cursed and screamed with his pain and his need. Alexei dodged the fists that flew in his direction when something he did made Walter angry. He knew the anger wasn't for him but for the body that was betraying his lover.

 

On the third day, when Walter dropped into a near normal sleep, Alexei left him with a crewman and went up on deck. He stood at the rail and offered up his thanks to god that Walter still lived and had come out on the other side. He didn't even realize that he was weeping until the wind picked up, turning his shirt into a cold covering.

 

He hurried back to the cabin and found the first real rest he had managed since the ordeal began. He woke the next morning to brown eyes watching him.

 

"How do you feel, Walter?"

 

"Hungry."

 

"Praise the lord. I'll go get you some food."

 

"Wait! Could we wash first and air the room? We've both smelled much better and this blanket is rank."

 

Alexei laughed with delight.

 

"What ever you want, my love. Do you want to go on deck? Do you think you can make it that far if I get someone to help us?"

 

"I don't think I'm ready for that but the chair would be a good change."

 

"Of course, how stupid of me."

 

Alexei pulled a clean blanket out of the chest and lined the chair with it. He soon had Walter on the chair wrapped up in the blanket while he stripped the bunk. He opened the porthole to allow fresh air to get into the cabin. And carried the linens up to the deck.

 

He came back, followed by a crewman with water. He made quick work of getting them both as clean as possible while confined to a basin and a bucket for a water supply. He then made the bed with clean linens and helped Walter back onto it.

 

Walter was obviously tired but he managed to stay awake while Alexei got them food. He ate more than Alexei had hoped for. And when he went back to sleep, Alexei sat watching him for a long time.

 

That day was the day Alexei knew without a doubt that his Walter would get well.

 

They both slept most of that day, eating each time they woke. The next morning found Walter determined to start moving around. The first day, he only made it to the door and back several times before each meal.

 

The second day, he made it up on deck and they settled him in a chair, wrapped in a blanket, to enjoy the fresh air. The third day, he managed to walk half the length of the ship. True, he had to rest before he could walk back but he felt a sense of triumph that Alexei shared with him.

 

Each day brought them closer to their new home and improvements in Walter's health. They had been favored with good weather so the journey was made in record time. Both men were pleased that the trip was going so well because they were both anxious to be on land and have a bed that was comfortable again.

 

None of the crew had commented on the fact that the two men shared a cabin. Walter just assumed that everyone thought it was so Alexei could help him if he relapsed. They knew he had been kidnapped and beaten. Daniel had told them that Alexei had helped find Walter and, in his Russian rage at seeing a family member abused in such a way, had killed the man responsible.

 

It was a story everyone was willing to accept because they all knew and liked Walter. He had always treated them fairly. The Skinner ships were the cleanest, best equipped sailing from New York and the men were paid a fair wage.

 

Walter and Alexei were on deck as they reached what was to be their new home. Both men were struck immediately with the beauty of the place. There were flowers everywhere and seagulls calling out. The dock populated by people of every race and creed.

 

Montego Bay was a bustling port. The smells of new spice and vanilla were in the air. There were stalks of bananas everywhere you turned. It was noisy, busy and Walter fell in love with it right away. For Alexei, it would take a little longer. Having been reared near St Petersburg, he found the tropical climate a little intense.

 

"Mr. Skinner, I've sent one of the crew ahead to the inn to arrange a room for you. If you would like to wait, I'll get a carriage as well."

 

"Is it far?"

 

"No, sir but in light of your recent injury I thought you might not want to tire yourself out walking."

 

"Alexei will get us a carriage if I can not make it. Give us directions, please."

 

They listened carefully to the directions before leaving the ship. Walter was smiling as he took in the sights. He looked at Alexei and noticed him wilting in the heat.

 

"Looks like we need new clothes for the climate down here. We should ask at the inn where to purchase them."

 

"It's so muggy, Walter. You don't suppose it is this way all the time, do you?"

 

"I'm sure it isn't. I'm sorry I caused this."

 

"You didn't cause it, Mulder did."

 

"But I should have paid more attention to what you said to me. Avoided him more. Maybe I could have done something to stop his obsession with me."

 

"Such as what, exactly? The man was insane, Walter. There is no reasoning with the insane."

 

"I should have done something to prevent you being in this situation."

 

"Walter, you must let this go. It's over. Now we need to get on with our lives. I will be happy under any conditions as long as you are at my side."

 

"Then you will live a happy life, my love."

 

"Look, Walter, there's the inn."

 

The inn was a blinding white in the sunlight. A deep veranda wrapped around the two sides that they could see. There were people sitting in wicker chairs fanning themselves as they whiled away the hot afternoon.

 

The two men would soon learn that not much transpired in the tropics during the heat of the afternoon. Only the slaves and servants worked during that part of the day. The crewman was waiting on the veranda for them. Walter realized it was the same crewman who had stayed with him the few times Alexei had left the cabin while they were on the ship.

 

"Mr. Skinner, the room is being made ready. The manager is having refreshments prepared for you and suggests that you have a seat out here."

 

"Thank you. Robert?"

 

"Yes, Sir, it's Robert."

 

"Robert, do you have a wife to go back to?"

 

"No, Sir. Why do you ask?"

 

"Alexei and I could use some help until we hire servants or any of his come to join us. I feel sure his coachman and cook at least will follow us. Would you be interested in taking a position with us? Staying until our next ship returns to New York?"

 

"I think I would like that, Mr. Skinner. Don't know if I'd want to stay permanent but a few months would be nice."

 

"Good, it's settled. Ask the Captain to please join us for dinner tonight and I'll arrange it with him."

 

A black servant appeared at their elbows, "Sirs, I have a cool drink for you. If there is anything else you desire, I will bring it for you."

 

Robert excused himself and headed back to the ship as the two men relaxed in rockers on the veranda. They were greeted briefly by the people nearest them but the heat seemed to have robbed everyone of the need to converse. By the time a servant came to say their room was ready, Walter was dozing. Alexei was sitting watching him with a soft smile on his face when he wasn't watching the activity of the slaves caring for the lush gardens and lawn in front of the inn.

 

The corner room was airy, with two sets of double doors that opened onto two private balconies. Yards of mosquito netting were gathered at either end of the bed. The room was not overly large but the wardrobe was big enough to house the clothing they had brought with them. A small washstand was in the corner beside the wardrobe holding a large basin and pitcher, a chamber pot concealed underneath.

 

The bed was placed so that any breeze coming through the doors would blow across it. The sheets were a brilliant white, which Alexei was beginning to realize, was the colour of choice here. But the bedspread was multicolored.

 

The hardwood floors were also bleached and he knew he would find them cool to the touch if he were barefoot. The ceilings high to allow for air circulation.

 

The luggage had been brought from the ship and was in their room. They unpacked then went back downstairs to await the evening meal.

 

The Captain showed up in time to have a drink with them before dinner. They were given a table in a corner of the dinning room. Walter waited until they were seated to begin the conversation.

 

"Captain, did Robert tell you why we wanted to see you?'

 

"He did say you had asked for him to stay here to lend a hand until you've found servants."

 

"Yes, Captain. As you know, I'm still recovering and that limits my ability to do the things we need to do to get established here."

 

"Mr. Skinner, I'm in complete agreement with you and Mr. Krycek getting established. You brother has promised me a nice share of the profits from this venture. I would like to see my sons given a better start in the world than I received."

 

"Really? I did not know that."

 

"Arthur and I discussed it, Walter. He felt that you would have offered this yourself, had you been able."

 

Walter smiled at Alexei, "He was right, Alexei, I would have. So, Captain, it's settled. Robert will stay until your next visit."

 

"I trust you will see that he stays out of trouble."

 

"Will I need to?"

 

"Well, he is of an age, Mr. Skinner. But he's a good boy. He's my sister's youngest. She hovered over the boy to the point that I insisted he come with me on this voyage to give him a chance to be a man. A few of the crew are taking him out on the town tonight. I told them to deliver him here afterwards. I'm sure he'll be quite drunk but he'll have become a man."

 

Walter looked at the Captain and roared with laughter. Then he beckoned over one of the serving girls.

 

"Please ask if there's a place available in the servants' dormitory. If so, tell the manager we'll need it for a crewmember who will be arriving later tonight."

 

The girl curtseyed and left to do as bidden. The conversation moved on then to the plans for getting set up in the spice trade. And discussions of whether or not rum might make a profitable cargo as well.

 

After dinner, the girl returned with the news that a bed was available and had been made ready for the boy when he arrived. She also placed a drink in front of each of the men.

 

"We did not order a drink." Alexei told her.

 

"It's for the fever, Sir."

 

"What?"

 

The Captain spoke then, "Another thing you gentlemen will need to get used to. The drink is made with gin. There are several different things they add to it or you may take it straight. It helps prevent malaria. You don't want to take a chance on getting that. Mr. Skinner, you especially should avoid the fever."

 

"Well, in that case, cheers, gentleman."

 

The three men downed the gin. The Captain excused himself when his drink was finished. Walter still tired easily so they also retired shortly after the Captain's departure.

 

Alexei tried not to watch Walter undress. Now that Walter was beginning to look more like his old self, Alexei was becoming aware of his body's needs again. It had been so long since they had made love. He hated that anyone else had touched Walter but he did not blame him for it. It did nothing to diminish Alexei's desire for the big man.

 

Alexei turned down the lantern to the lowest setting so that it gave just enough light for them to move about the room should they have need during the night. Walter was already in bed with the netting arranged on his side. Alexei loosened the netting on his side of the bed, before sitting down and then pulling the netting closed.

 

He lay back, staying as far to his side of the bed as possible.

 

"Alexei, why are you so far away?"

 

"I thought that now that we have more room, you would want to spread out a little."

 

"Alexei, for over a year now, I have slept with you either curled around me or still inside me, or me curled around you. Why would I suddenly want you way over there? You heard the Captain say the nights get cool. Do you want me to catch a chill?"

 

"Walter, I don't want you chilled."

 

"But?"

 

"I want you, Walter. I know you aren't ready for that and…"

 

"Alexei, I'm not ready to have you inside me but we could touch each other. If we can't make love properly, I can at least give you release."

 

"It isn't fair of me to ask that of you."

 

"You didn't ask, I offered. Please, come over here. Let's see how well my body thinks it is."

 

Alexei groaned deep in his throat as he rolled toward his lover. Walter was on his side, his arms open to receive Alexei. For several long moments, they did nothing but kiss while holding each other.

 

Walter could feel Alexei's erection against him and felt no fear. Mulder drugging him may have been a blessing in disguise. Had he remembered more of what happened to him, or had he not known such joy with Alexei prior, he might have tensed up.

 

Alexei made no move to do more than hold and kiss Walter. When Walter's hand wrapped around him, he sighed against the lips he was kissing. Walter stroked his lover in the familiar pattern he had learned early in their relationship.

 

In a few minutes, Alexei cried out softly into Walter's mouth as his cock jerked and painted them both with his come. Walter smiled against the cheek of the panting man, happy that he had given his lover something back for all the care Alexei had given him. It didn't matter in the least to Walter that he hadn't even become erect.

 

Alexei slipped from the bed, cleaned himself quickly and came over with a cloth to clean Walter. When he got back into the bed, he pulled Walter close to him and kissed him a tender goodnight with a whispered "Thank you".

 

Walter was soon asleep and Alexei lay awake wondering if Walter would ever feel pleasure of his own again. And he wondered if Walter would stay with him if the relationship only provided Alexei with sex.

 

The next morning, they dressed in their lightest weight clothing before going down to breakfast. They asked where they might purchase clothing more suitable to the climate and went shopping after breakfast. The afternoon brought a nap for Walter on the veranda as Alexei tried to read.

 

When young Robert put in an appearance late in the afternoon, Walter gently teased about drinking and carousing. The boy blushed causing Walter to smile. But even with the blush, there was something a little different in his manner.

 

They talked and made plans for the next day. Alexei insisted that Robert be with Walter whenever he could not. So, it was planned that when Walter went to see Arthur's contacts Robert would go with him. In the meantime Alexei would see about finding them a house.

 

Later, Alexei would privately instruct Robert to stay at Walter's side at all time. He impressed upon the boy that Walter was still very weak and he did not want Walter to overdo.

 

By the end of the first week in Jamaica Walter was entertaining plantation owners and making deals for their next crops of new spice. Alexei had found them a house outside of town that he was having cleaned to make it ready for them.

 

Walter had sent Robert to the ship with a pouch for the Captain to deliver to the family. It contained a contract and a letter to his brother.

 

 

 

 

Dear Arthur,

 

We have arrived safely in Montego Bay. The island is truly beautiful, if somewhat warm. The heat sent us out to purchase new clothing our second day here. You would not recognize me decked out in cottons and linens. Our wardrobes consist of mostly white with tans and dress black that is only worn at night.

 

My health was greatly improved by the voyage as we hoped. I still tire easily but I feel sure that will pass with time. Each day it seems I manage to stay awake for longer periods of time. I have also regained a good bit of the flesh I lost during my ordeal.

 

Alexei has secured a house for us. It is built in the style most favored here, with wide verandas on all four sides to offer plenty of shade. The rooms are big and airy, designed to allow for plenty of air to circulate. All in white as that is the style as well. Alexei muttered in Russian about how boring that was but I find it to be clean looking. The locals tell me it helps with the heat.

 

He is keeping busy with having it cleaned and furnished for us. I hope once we are settled and I feel my old self to make a few pieces of our furnishing as I did there. Alexei is, of course, hoping that his cook will choose to join us here as he misses her cooking. And I must confess to missing it as well.

 

Robert Stephens, the Captain's nephew, will be staying with us to help out until the next ship arrives. The boy seems quite intelligent so when he returns I hope you will see to it that he has a good position with the family.

 

In the pouch you will find a copy of the contract I have secured for us since my arrival. I confess I did not expect to have this type of news for you this quickly.

 

The contract is with another transplanted Russian who has a plantation a days journey from the town. He and his wife were in town for a week of shopping when they heard Alexei speak to me in Russian. Turns out they came here from a town where Alexei spent summers with a maiden aunt.

 

I have made positive contacts with other plantation owners as well. It appears we arrived at the time of year when they normally bring their wives into town for shopping. I hope to have even more good news to send you with the next ship.

 

The Captain and I managed to secure additional cargo for you this trip. I paid a little more than we will pay under the contract but I feel that it was a good investment. The good will it brought should help me secure more contracts for us.

 

Please tell Daniel and Katya that we send our love. Alexei promises he will include a letter next time. He is spending long hours at the house. Neither of us wishes to stay at the inn any longer than necessary. We both feel a need to start building our new life here and that is better done in a home.

 

He has not allowed me to go near the place since we first went out see it. He says he doesn't want to tire me with the long drive but I feel sure he just wants it to be a welcoming home when I see it next.

 

I will close now so that Robert can take the pouch to the ship.

 

As ever your brother,

 

Walter

 

 

Walter left out that he really felt Alexei was working so diligently on the house because he wanted Walter to have a more comfortable place to recover. And he wanted more privacy for them.

 

Walter still had not attained an erection as he lay next to his lover at night. But they had shared many long hours holding and kissing each other. And though Alexei felt as though he were using him, Alexei allowed Walter to bring him release but only with his hands. His reasoning was that he was being selfish enough allowing that.

 

Walter had made several offers to pleasure his lover orally but had been rebuffed. Walter worried that in spite of Alexei's willingness to kiss and hold him, he now thought of Walter as soiled and that was why he would not allow it. The issue of anal penetration had not been raised, as they both knew Walter was not ready for that.

 

It took Alexei a month to get the house ready for them to move in. They had hired a girl to cook for them until Ludmilla would arrive. Alexei told Walter that she had followed him from Russia, he knew she would follow him again.

 

When the carriage pulled to a stop in front of the house, the new coat of paint covering it immediately drew Walter's attention.

 

"Alexei, it looks wonderful. What made you decide on pale yellow?"

 

"I wanted some colour but didn't want to use a dark one that would draw the heat. So, do you really like it?"

 

Alexei sounded anxious. Walter turned to him with a smile.

 

"It was an inspired decision. It gets us away from the white but still looks cool. I can hardly wait to see what you've done with the inside."

 

Alexei jumped down from the carriage and reached up to assist his lover. While Walter was getting around quite well for most activities moving into and out of the carriage was still difficult for him. There were areas of his body that still appeared bruised. Alexei didn't think Walter's skin would ever clear completely. Every time he saw the marks he wished he had made Mulder suffer before he died.

 

Walter chafed at needing the help but could not deny that it was needed. He had not told Alexei just how much pain he was still experiencing. He had faith that he would one day be pain free. And he had no intention of using drugs again.

 

Walter walked slowly to the house, the trip having made his muscles tense up. Alexei noticed but made no comment. As they walked, the tension slowly eased.

 

The veranda had been equipped with chairs and small tables. Netting was rolled up to the ceiling. Alexei had insisted on it being added so that they could enjoy sitting on the veranda for longer periods of time without being devoured by the bugs. Walter smiled at his lover's foresight in having that added.

 

Alexei watched Walter carefully as they entered the foyer of the house. Here too Alexei had added colour. A pale blue wallpaper had been added to the walls giving the foyer an open almost underwater look. A rather large table was sitting in the middle of the area, holding a vase filled with the bright tropic flowers from the garden outside.

 

"The flowers look nice, Alexei. I noticed the garden had been cleaned up. Katya would love the garden, don't you think?"

 

"Yes, she would. Maybe someday she and Daniel will visit. Come and see what I did with the library."

 

Walter followed Alexei to the room to the left of the foyer. When they had looked at the house before Alexei bought it they had agreed that the larger room would be the library. Only one box of books had been transported with them but another box would be sent with each ship. Alexei and Walter both being fond of reading as a pastime, there had been complete agreement on the need to have books.

 

"I thought this the best place to set up a table for our chess games. The light is good here quite late in the day."

 

Walter admired the smile on his lover's face as he pointed out the amenities of the room. He noticed as well the pots of ferns and other green plants in the corners of the room. The pale blue had been extended to this room as well.

 

"I can see we'll be spending many hours in this room. I had no idea you had such talent. I guess I just assumed that Katya had helped decorate your home in New York."

 

"Why, Walter, your lover has many talents. I'm glad you are pleased. It is so different from our home there. I wanted our life to be fresh, clean."

 

"Unlike me."

 

Walter's voice held a trace of bitterness he couldn't quell. Alexei jerked as if shot and looked at Walter with surprise.

 

"Do you believe I blame you? That I feel you are dirty?"

 

Alexei moved to stand within touching distance of the man he loved so desperately.

 

"I don't think you blame me but…"

 

Alexei reached to take Walter's hand and drew him over to sit on the sofa.

 

"But, what? Tell me."

 

"You won't let me pleasure you except with my hands. You hold me and kiss me but is it only for comfort? Do you not want me anymore?"

 

"God! Walter, how can you think I don't want you? If I did not want you, would I be hard when we lie together in our bed at night? I've never stopped wanting you from the moment I first saw you."

 

"I always thought you took a certain pride in being the only man I had been with. That's no longer true. And he's left me incapable of giving you what you need. What if I can never accept you into my body again? Will you still want me if that’s the case?"

 

"Walter, I may no longer be the only man to be in your body but I'm still the first, still the only one you have welcomed. What he did doesn't change that. Can never change that. So I still have something to be proud of, proud that you wanted me. As for being incapable of giving me what I need – you do that every day. You give me you. Understand this – even if you can never welcome me inside you again, I *won't* stop loving you."

 

"Then why won't you let me please you with my mouth?"

 

"I feel badly enough to be receiving gratification when you are not, without involving you so intimately in the act."

 

"But I want to do that for you. I've always enjoyed the feel and taste of you in my mouth. I want you to touch me even if I don't become hard. I need to know in my gut that you still want me."

 

Alexei pulled Walter into a deep kiss that came to an abrupt halt when they heard a sharp gasp from the doorway. The two men turned to see Robert standing there with a look of total shock on his face. He spun on his heel and ran from the room.

 

"I think we may have lost our helper. I'll go talk to him. That is, if he isn't half way back to town."

 

"Maybe I should, Walter. I can tell him it's my fault…"

 

"No, Alexei, you aren't going to take the blame for something that we both began together. I don't want anyone ever thinking that you forced me in any way. If he's going to be here with us, he had to find out sooner or later and it's best that he knows the truth. I don't want to be skulking in our own home. We didn't have to do that in New York and I certainly don't want to do it here. This is our new life, Alexei, and I want us to live it as honestly as possible."

 

"I'll wait for you here then. I love you, Walter."

 

"And I love you. I won't be long."

 

Walter went out and found the boy in the carriage house. He was cleaning the dust from the journey off the side of the carriage.

 

"Robert, I guess we need to talk."

 

"No, Sir. You owe me no explanation. I merely work for you."

 

"Robert, you have been my right hand this last month. You are more than a servant. I had hoped you understood that."

 

"You have both been very generous with me."

 

"Robert, will you look at me?"

 

Robert turned slowly and looked up. Instead of disgust Walter saw puzzlement in his eyes.

 

"Do you want to ask me any questions?"

 

"I don't have any right to question you, Sir."

 

"You walked in on something you obviously didn't expect to see. From your reaction I assume you had no idea Alexei and I were lovers."

 

"I…my mother has kept me very secluded. My uncle brought me on this trip because he said it was time for me to grow up. Until I heard the men talking on the ship, I didn't know that men…"

 

"Make love to each other. Alexei and I make love to each other. We don't just rut. We would be married if one of us were female. Does it bother you enough that you wish to leave? If so, I will see that you have a place to stay until the next ship arrives."

 

"I'm not sure how I feel about it. I guess when I heard the men talking about it – I expected – well I didn't expect it from a man like you, or Mr. Krycek either."

 

"Because?"

 

"Because you are both so *male*. I guess. I'm just really confused. Would you just give me some time to think about it?"

 

"If that's what you need. I'll answer any questions, as long as they aren't too personal. But you should know now that Alexei often touches me, kisses me. I give you my word that unless you open a closed door, you won't see more than that. But we won't hide our relationship in our own house so if you decide you can't be comfortable then you should leave."

 

Walter walked slowly back to the house. He found Alex sitting on the porch waiting.

 

"Well, is he leaving?"

 

"He wants some time to think about it. He's been pretty sheltered. He has only recently heard about men like us. He wasn't expecting to find us in that situation. We're too male."

 

"Looking for that sign on our foreheads, huh?"

 

"Yes, I guess. Want to show me the rest of our home now?"

 

"Are you sure you feel up to it? It was a long ride out here and now this emotional ride."

 

"I want to see our home. I'm anxious to see what else you have changed. What colour you picked for our bedroom."

 

"Green to match my eyes, because you tell me often that you love my eyes."

 

Walter smiled as Alexei stood to lead him inside. They bypassed the rest of the downstairs and went instead up to see the master bedroom. Since all the bedrooms were of a similar size, Alexei had decided to use the one on the east side of the house for their bedroom.

 

As Alexei had said the room was done in shades of green. Walter thought it made a beautiful background for his beautiful lover. The bed had been specially made for them, big enough to be comfortable but not so big that they would lose each other in it. The obligatory netting gathered at each post. Walter grinned as he thought about the possibility of the tiebacks being used for other purposes.

 

"Want to take a nap, Walter?"

 

"Only if you are napping with me and napping isn't all that we do."

 

"Are you sure?"

 

"Very sure."

 

Alexei turned to close the door, he even flipped the latch, a modification he had added that caused the workman to scratch their heads in wonder. When he turned back, he found Walter already half-naked. He watched as the rest of the beloved body appeared. Watched the painful way Walter moved onto the bed.

 

"Are you joining me?"

 

"Be right there, my love."

 

Alexei undressed and joined his lover on the bed. They held each other, sharing several long, loving kisses. Alexei made no protest as Walter pushed him onto his back and moved the kisses lower. He arched up with pleasure when Walter's hot mouth enveloped him.

 

Alexei gave himself up to the sensations, doing nothing to hold back his climax. Walter's talents were such that in a very short time his lover was shooting down his throat with a loud cry of pleasure. Walter kissed his way back up to lie holding Alexei as he calmed.

 

Alexei pushed Walter down and began the same type of oral attention he had received earlier. Walter reacted to the mouth on his nipples by grasping his lover closer. Alexei trailed his kisses lower only to find that Walter was flaccid.

 

Alexei spent several long minutes courting the column of flesh, only to find it did not harden. Alexei's heart broke a little as Walter reached to pull him back up next to him.

 

"It's all right, Alexei. I enjoy the feel of you kissing me, touching me. I guess my body is just not well enough yet."

 

"Rest, Walter."

 

Walter sighed as Alexei snuggled in close to him. As soon as Walter drifted off to sleep, Alexei rose, dressed and made his way downstairs to speak to the girl they had hired to cook for them. He was surprised to find Robert sitting at the table watching the girl as she went about her duties.

 

Alexei hid the smile that wanted to creep onto his lips. He wanted to keep things as low key as possible until Robert made his decision on staying with them. And he could understand the boy's attraction; Hester was a pretty little thing.

 

"Hester, when do you plan on having dinner ready?"

 

"I thought I would serve at the same time we normally did at the inn. Will that be all right?"

 

"Yes, Hester, that should allow Walter a nice long nap. I'm afraid the trip out was quite tiring for him."

 

"Mr. Krycek, I could bring dinner up to you and Mr. Skinner if you would like. That way he won't have to come down and then climb the stairs again." Robert volunteered from his seat at the table.

 

"That would be very kind of you, Robert. I'll be on the veranda. Could you come and let me know when Hester is ready to fix the tray? That will give me time to see that Walter is awake and set up a table in our room for dinner."

 

"Yes, Sir, I'll do that."

 

Alexei went out to the veranda with a book and let down the netting to keep the bugs away. He hoped Robert's offer meant that he was coming to accept their relationship and would be staying with them. The boy had been such a help to Walter and he knew Walter had come to view him much as he did Daniel.

 

Alexei was dozing when Robert came to tell him that dinner was ready. He hastily rubbed the sleep from his eyes and hurried up the stairs to wake Walter. Only to find him awake.

 

"You're awake."

 

"Yes, isn't it about dinner time? I'm starved."

 

"Hester is making us a tray and Robert will bring it up so put something on so you don't embarrass the boy."

 

"Robert? Has he made a decision to stay."

 

"I didn't ask but I think Hester may help him make that decision."

 

Walter had his pants up over his hips and turned to look at Alexei who was moving chairs to the table he had pulled toward the center of the room.

 

"Hester?"

 

"Yes, I found him sitting in the kitchen with her earlier, watching her every move."

 

"Well, she is a pretty girl. And about his age."

 

Before the conversation could continue there was a light tap at the door. Walter hurried to pull his shirt on before Alexei opened the door.

 

"Good evening, Robert."

 

"Evening, Mr. Skinner. Did you have a good rest?" Robert asked as he placed the tray on the table Alexei had set up for them.

 

"Yes, Robert, I did. What has Hester made us for dinner?"

 

"Roast chicken with potatoes and a dessert made with bananas. Should I bring up coffee or tea later?"

 

"Yes, tea, thank you."

 

Robert stopped at the door, turned to look at the two men, seeing Alexei fussing over Walter as he placed a small pillow behind Walter's back. The gentle smile Walter turned to Alexei as he adjusted the pillow enough to push Robert into his decision.

 

"Mr. Skinner."

 

"Yes, Robert?"

 

"I'll be staying, if you still want me to."

 

Alexei answered for them both.

 

"Of course, we want you to stay, Robert. You have been Walter's right hand these last weeks. Did Hester have anything to do with the decision?"

 

Alexei grinned as he watched the blush spread on Robert's cheeks.

 

"Pay him no mind, Robert. Your reasons aren't important. I'm glad you've decided to stay with us. Don't forget the gin when you bring up the tea."

 

The door closed gently behind Robert and Walter grinned at Alexei.

 

"You shouldn't tease him, Alexei."

 

"Why not? You tease him often enough."

 

"He's such an easy target. I'm glad he's staying. The place is too big for Hester to care for alone."

 

++++++++++++

 

In the months that followed Walter slowly regained all the weight he had lost. Most of his days were now pain free and the days with pain could be blamed to his overdoing. He had returned to his hobby of making furniture.

 

The nights were a time of holding and kissing. Walter would bring his lover to the brink of ecstasy then push him over into rapture. Alexei fretted that Walter was still not capable of attaining a complete erection although he had begun to harden part way and he insisted that he enjoyed Alexei's attentions to him even though he did not climax.

 

The day Robert's uncle's ship returned to port the two men had been in town with Robert, arranging for Robert and Hester to be married. Seems Hester had been looking at Robert as often as he looked at her. And looking was not all that had been happening. Robert would be a father before the year was over.

 

They were on their way to the inn for lunch when they saw the Captain coming their way. Walter called out to him and watched as the smile spread over his face.

 

"Captain Keller, come join us at the inn for lunch."

 

"Mr. Skinner, Mr. Krycek, I was just going to see about getting a horse to come out to the house."

 

"Well, let's have lunch first and you can come out in the carriage afterward with us. Why don't you stay at the house while in port that'll give you more time with Robert."

 

"How is the lad?"

 

"He has some big news for you. He's coming to the inn later to pick us up so you can talk to him then."

 

"Seems I don't need to ask if you are well, Mr. Skinner. You both look as though you have adjusted quite well to the islands. Your brother will be glad to hear you are looking so fit. And, Mr. Krycek, I was told to tell you first thing that Katya had a boy."

 

"A boy? Walter, we must celebrate."

 

"Yes, we'll raise a toast to my great-nephew and your second cousin. Tell us, Captain, what did they name him?"

 

"Alexei Walter."

 

"What!" The two men spoke as one and the Captain smiled at the surprise on their faces.

 

"Mrs. Skinner said I was to make sure and tell you that it was Daniel's idea, but one she supported wholeheartedly."

 

"Walter, you must complete the chest and send it to him."

 

"There's not much left to do. I'll add his name and have it ready before the Captain sails back."

 

Lunch brought much talk of how Arthur had reacted to the Captain coming back with a contract. Arthur said he knew his brother must be on the road to recovery if he had obtained a contract so quickly after arriving. The real conversation began when Robert arrived with his bride to be.

 

Captain Keller saw them coming before Walter or Alexei did.

 

"Mr. Skinner, who is the pretty girl with Robert?"

 

"Ah...I think he should tell you."

 

Robert saw his uncle and hurried Hester along.

 

"Uncle Samuel, when did you arrive?"

 

"This morning. I was on the way to hire a horse to ride out to the house when I saw Mr. Skinner and Mr. Krycek. They invited me to lunch and suggested that I stay at the house. Now, tell me who is this pretty girl?"

 

"Sorry. Uncle Samuel, this is Hester, my fiancée. We came into town to make the wedding arrangements."

 

"Your mother will have a fit," but Samuel was ginning from ear to ear as he spoke. "Hester, welcome to the family."

 

"Thank you, Sir."

 

"You don't need to be so formal. Call me Uncle Samuel."

 

"We were afraid you might get angry that he will be staying here." Walter told the Captain.

 

"No, not at all. He's a man after all, and time he made his own decisions."

 

"Robert, everything taken care of with Hester's parents?"

 

"Yes, they'll be at the house for dinner tonight. Thank you again, Mr. Krycek, for suggesting we have the wedding there. Hester's mother was very pleased, also with the offer of flowers from the garden."

 

"Walter and I both want the day to be wonderful for you. Now, I think you should get the carriage and we should head for home."

 

During the trip home Walter opened the pouch the Captain had brought from Arthur. He handed the letter from Katya to Alexei as he pulled out one from Arthur.

 

"Walter, why don't we wait and read them after dinner when we go up. I'm sure the Captain would like some time to get to know Hester and her family."

 

"Good idea."

 

The dinner went smoothly, Hester's parents had arrived early so her mother and sisters could help prepare. Walter and Alex excused themselves right after dinner and retired to their room.

 

"Want me to go first, since Arthur's letter will probably be mostly business."

 

"That's fine. We already know the most important thing that will be in Katya's."

 

Walter opened the letter and settled against the headboard to read it to his lover.

 

 

 

 

Dear Walter and Alexei,

 

They shared a look of surprise at that.

 

 

I imagine you will already know that I am a grandfather. The boy is as beautiful as his mother. I fear for all the young girls when he comes of age. Katya came through the birth quite well. The doctor says she was made for child bearing.

 

I myself have been well, as is the rest of the family. I hope that you, my brother, are in even better health than your last letter told me. I'm sure Alexei is looking after you properly.

 

As for him, the authorities have stopped looking for him but I have no doubt that should he ever come back to New York, he would be arrested forthwith. The Mulder family will not admit that the man was insane. They keep yelling about justice and although I would like to tell them the condition you were in, I don't dare. Daniel and Katya have enough to deal with as is.

 

Please do not take that to be a condemnation of either of you. It is just the reality of the world we live in. Alexei did what he had to do and it was the right thing to do, no matter what others think.

 

I look forward to hearing from you when next the ship reaches port. I'm sure in your usual competent way you have secured more business for us.

 

I pray this letter finds you both well and happy.

 

Your Brother

 

Arthur

 

 

"Alexei, my brother just welcomed you to the family. I know it may not seem that way but it is there between the lines."

 

"He loves you very much, doesn't he?"

 

"Yes, he does. Now read me Katya's letter."

 

 

Dearest Cousin,

 

 

By now I'm sure you know I have a beautiful son whom we named for the two of you. I'm afraid Daniel will just have to accept my word that the boy is his because he looks just like you. The same dark hair and our green eyes. I fear he will be quite vain when he grows up. The birth was far easier than I expected and I'm sure he will have bothers and sister to grow up with.

 

We miss you both horribly but that can not be helped. Arthur read us Walter's letter and Daniel and I were pleased to hear that he is recovering. I will tell you now that neither of us expected that to be the case. We both feared the damage too severe to survive.

 

Ludmilla did not travel to join you this time because she has a child of her own on the way. She and Pavel and the child will join you after the babe is born. I know we had all begun to think her barren but it seems that is not the case after all. The babe will probably be born before this letter even reaches you.

 

Daniel is doing quite well in the business. He says you gave him a good job to walk into but I know he is skilled as well. He had a good example to follow.

 

Father is well and courting a nice widow he met when he transferred to a new church so I may have a stepmother soon.

 

I will close for now. We all send our love and hope that you are both thriving in your new home.

 

 

Yours ever,

 

Katya

 

 

"So, your cousin thinks you're vain?"

 

"She didn't say that. Although she does think that."

 

Alexei smiled as Walter pulled him close.

 

"I'm glad we'll have more good news to send them. Ludmilla with a baby. How wonderful for her and Pavel. Have they always wanted a child?"

 

"Yes. I'm so happy for her, she will make a good mother. I guess this means Hester keeps cooking for us as long as she can. Walter, our home will be filled with children this time next year."

 

"Maybe we should build them their own cottages. I love children but I love our privacy as well."

 

"I think that's a good idea."

 

++++++++++++++

 

The wedding had been beautiful and everyone had departed. Walter and Alexei sat on the veranda late into the evening making plans for where the cottages would be located and what Walter would make for each couple as a housewarming gift.

 

They had been sitting side by side holding hands as they talked. Walter squeezed Alexei's hand gently.

 

"Bedtime, love. Do you realize that we are totally alone for the first time ever?"

 

"And what do you want to do now that we are?" Alexei smiled at the bad little boy look on Walter's face.

 

"I want you to make me purr with pleasure."

 

Walter had risen from his chair and pulled Alexei up to stand in the circle of his arms. The kiss started slow and gentle but soon became rough with passion. Alexei's hand moved down Walter's body to confirm what he thought he was feeling against him.

 

Walter was totally erect for the first time since before his kidnapping. Walter's hand covered Alexei's and he applied gentle pressure.

 

They broke from the kiss and Walter touched his forehead to Alexei's.

 

"I want you inside me, Alexei. I want you to make love to me."

 

Alexei sucked in a ragged breath.

 

"Are you sure, Walter? Because I don't know if I can stop once we start. I've missed being inside you more than I know how to tell you. But I'd rather do without than ever hurt you."

 

"I know. I've missed it, too. And I know you don't want to hurt me. I didn't think we should try it until I was able to get hard for you. You kept telling me how you felt like you were using me with what we were doing. I didn't want to add to that feeling."

 

Alexei squeezed the erection in his lover's pants before kissing him once more.

 

"Let's go to bed." Alexei's voice was a soft caress holding a promise of pleasure.

 

Walter turned and pulling Alexei by the hand led the way into the house and up to their room. The two men undressed hurriedly and, after letting down the netting, met in the center of their bed.

 

For several long minutes, they held each other, just kissing. When Walter pulled Alexei's hand to cover his hard cock, Alexei sighed against his lips.

 

"Please, Alexei, don't make me wait any longer. I need you. It's been too long."

 

Alexei kissed his way down to a nipple and bit gently at it. Walter's hand held him there as he hissed, "Harder!"

 

Alexei did as asked and bit Walter in the way that made them both happy. The answering purr from the big man's throat went straight to Alexei's heart.

 

He pulled away from Walter long enough to get the oil that he had been using the night before to massage tired muscles. Kneeling between his lover's legs, he rubbed an oil slick finger over and around the hole he wished to be inside soon.

 

Walter became impatient with the delicate slow strokes of his lover. Reaching down, he grasped Alexei's hand and guided his lover's finger inside him. He made a little grunt.

 

"That's better."

 

Alexei grinned and began to slip his finger in and out waiting to feel the muscle relax. When Walter made a harump sound, Alexei reached for more oil and added another finger. Walter's hips rose to facilitate the entrance and Alexei's mind eased.

 

He had begun to think he would never feel such joy again. That his Walter would never be whole again. He felt the tears threaten and willed them away. Bending down, he kissed Walter deeply as he slid another finger inside the virginally tight passage. Walter's sigh in his mouth told him that it was going to be fine.

 

Alexei trailed his kisses down Walter's chest, stopping to bite each nipple and enjoy the way Walter arched up against him.

 

"Alexei, if you don’t get inside me right now, I'm going to throw you down on the bed and take what I want."

 

Walter smiled at the happy laugh he received in reply. His smile growing as the fingers were removed and something much bigger and harder pressed against him. Walter's hands reached to grab his lover's ass. When the head breached his muscle ring, Walter pulled Alexei forward forcefully.

 

Both men gasped and went still as Walter was fully impaled.

 

"Walter?"

 

"Do it, Alexei. Make me fly again."

 

Alexei nodded at his lover and began to move, slowly at first but picking up speed as Walter clung to him and whispered encouragement. He moved strongly inside his lover while working one hand on Walter's cock. Alexei heard the sounds that meant Walter was close. He shifted position slightly to make every stroke count.

 

"I love you. Come for me, Walter."

 

Walter let lose a loud scream as his cock exploded in Alexei's hand. Both men were soon covered with Walter's hot sperm. His muscle contractions on Alexei brought a whimper from the man straining toward his own climax. A few more hard thrusts and Alexei emptied into his lover's body.

 

Alexei collapsed, lying on Walter's chest as they worked to refill their lungs with air. Finally, he rose to get a cloth to clean them. He then crawled into bed and allowed Walter to pull him close.

 

"I didn't think we were ever going to be able to do that again. I didn't hurt you, did I?"

 

"No, love. You've never hurt me. It felt so good to have you inside me again."

 

"It felt better than good being there. And knowing I gave you pleasure was another thing I had begun to think would never happen again."

 

"Alexei, how could you think you didn't give me pleasure? Sex isn't the only thing about our life that pleases me. But I have to say I'm very glad we have that back. You certainly haven't lost your touch."

 

"So, does that mean I can wake you the way I used to in the morning?"

 

"You'd better or who knows what I might do."

 

"I love you, so very much, Walter."

 

"As I love you, Alexei."

 

++++++++++++++

 

Epilogue

 

Walter turned to look at Alex sitting tensed in the corner of the sofa.

 

"This is the reason you've never trusted Mulder around me, isn't it?"

 

"That's only part of it. Guess you think I'm an idiot, huh?"

 

Walter reached to pull Alex into his arms before he answered.

 

"Only 'cause you keep loving me after so many lifetimes of fuck-ups. You said that is only part of the reason. What else is there?"

 

"Why is it you are always so blind to the looks you get? In all our lives together you've never realized how fucking hot you are! Not just to me but to men and women alike. You wander down the halls and have both sexes stare at you, their chins hanging, drool running out of the corners of their mouths, and you never notice. Mulder looks at you as if you were a buffet lunch and he hasn't eaten in days. Even the Ice Queen looks now and again, mostly when you wear that gunmetal gray Boss."

 

"You're joking, right? Scully looks?"

 

"I'm not joking. If either of them would admit it to the other, they'd probably try to make a sandwich out of you."

 

Walter grinned his most wicked grin against the head resting on his shoulder.

 

"Sandwich, huh? That might be fun."

 

Alex jerked back from him, green eyes flashing, "You want a session with my bull whip?"

 

"I love it when my Master is so possessive. If you feel I need a session, Master, I will go prepare myself."

 

The eyes toned down as Alex realized Walter was teasing.

 

"The only sandwich making you will be doing, slave, is for my lunch."

 

"Lunch first? Then the session?" The smile on Walter's face was anything but submissive.

 

"Of course, I want my lunch first. Afterwards you won't be in any condition to be making lunch. Plus by then it'll be closer to dinner time."

 

Alex kissed Walter gently then pushed him to get him up. With a grin, Walter headed toward the kitchen. Walter turned in the doorway.

 

"You want roast beef or chicken salad?"

 

"Roast beef. I need something to fortify me for beating an unruly slave."

 

Walter nodded and hurried out of the room. Alex sat with a small smile on his face while he planned how he would make his slave fly for the rest of the afternoon.


	6. VI: Sea Captive

  
Author's notes: Memories of past lives. This is the fifth regression.  
  
NOTES: Thanks to Bill. Blame this one on Ursula, Bertie, Ned and Leny. Thanks Tosca for the food info. For the Ned and Leny picture that helped inspire this go here  
http://squidge.org/~praxisters/fantasy.html  


* * *

"Pretty, isn't he, Captain? Should warm your bed nicely. Shall I put him in your cabin?"

 

I glanced at the boy Mulder was holding. He was chained and had been beaten. The marks crisscrossing his chest were red, and in spots caked with blood.

 

I was irritated by Mulder's remarks. It seemed he was forever implying that I used catamites for my sexual pleasure, in spite of never having seen me with a boy. Why, I didn't even have a cabin boy, due to my fear of his being used badly by my men. I had no illusions about my crew.

 

The boy twisted as if trying to get away, even though he was hobbled by the chains and would not get far. I looked closer and barked at him.

 

"Be still, you fool. Even if you get loose, you still have the chains to prevent your freedom. What is your name?"

 

He looked up then and I found myself drowning in a sea of green, his eyes a colour I had never seen before. Chained and beaten, he still had a dignity about him, a strength that had nothing to do with size and everything to do with intelligence.

 

"My name is Alexei. I demand my freedom. The merchant lies when he says I have not completed my indentured service. My time was completed over a year ago. He sent me to you as a way of cheating you of the money he owes you."

 

"Mulder, did he tell you this before you brought him on board?"

 

"Yes, Captain, but you know how servants lie."

 

"Come with me, Alexei. You will stay in my cabin while I go and talk to the merchant."

 

Mulder let go of the boy and headed back ashore to complete his in-port duties. The boy followed me to my cabin without further conversation. Once inside, he looked around carefully before sitting on the floor.

 

"You may use a chair, boy. That's what they are here for."

 

"He never allowed me to sit on the furniture. The only time I was ever on furniture in his house was when his guests wanted their beds warmed."

 

"How old are you, boy?"

 

"Twenty."

 

"You were indentured at twelve?"

 

"Yes. My parents sent me from Russia, thinking I'd have a better life once the servitude was over. But the merchant had no intention of letting me go. At least not as long as his guests still wanted me."

 

"Did Mulder ask for you?"

 

It was a question I wasn't totally sure I wanted an answer to.

 

"No. He asked for one of the girls. Her name is Dana. I heard him asking the merchant to sell her to him this morning."

 

Considering Mulder's repeated remarks to me, I was surprised that he had asked for a female. I looked at the boy, seeing the layers of filth on his body, knowing if I got closer he would reek. Guess the merchant's guests weren't too picky about odor.

 

I walked to the door and called for one of my men.

 

"Bring down water. A couple of buckets of cold and a kettle of hot."

 

Walking over to the boy, I used the keys Mulder had given me to release the chains.

 

"There's no point in trying to run. You'd never make it off the ship. When the water gets here, you will wash. I have a sensitive nose and you smell."

 

"I've been locked in the merchant's cellar for three weeks. He seldom bathes, so he saw no reason to give me extra water for such a frivolous reason."

 

"Then this is not your normal state?"

 

His lip curled with distaste, "No, I prefer to be as clean as possible."

 

A knock on the door ended the conversation temporarily. The cold water was placed in the basin to await the arrival of the hot. I went over to my trunk, digging through it, searching for anything that might be suitable for the boy to wear. Finally, I pulled out a robe and threw it on the bed.

 

When the hot water arrived, I handed the boy the soap and some toweling.

 

"Make sure you get clean. You may use the robe until I can get you something more suitable to wear."

 

Alexei dropped the ragged breeches he was wearing, totally unconcerned to be naked in front of me. I suppose I did not appear to be like the men who had used his body. But, in any case, it did not matter he was here and could do nothing to stop me if I wanted to use him.

 

I was amazed at my reaction to seeing the boy naked. For a moment, I wondered how the cock lying along a lean thigh would look erect. Would it darken much? Would it grow as much as my own?

 

Boy was a poor description for the bondsman. True, he was slender, his body looking younger than his actual years. That was probably the result of poor rations. Knowing the merchant, I was sure he didn't feed his servants very well.

 

I watched as Alexei dipped his head in the basin. He scrubbed at his hair then rinsed it as best he could. Reaching for a cup, I moved to the boy and motioned for him to lean forward. I used the cup to see that all the soap was rinsed from what would become silky black hair when dry.

 

The smile of thanks the boy gave me went right to the pit of my stomach. I nodded curtly and moved quickly away, my fingers still wet from combing through the boy's hair.

 

As I watched clean skin emerge from under the grime, I saw the signs of abuse on a body that was still beautiful in spite of the scars. The boy flinched as he cleaned the new whip marks, but he cleaned them thoroughly.

 

Again, I moved forward and took the cloth to wash the strong back. The thank you smile this time lodged in my cock, bringing it erect.

 

"I'm going ashore. I'll have some bread and cheese brought. You will stay here. Understand? If you try to leave, my crew will stop you."

 

"Yes, Captain. I understand. I thank you for giving me water to bathe and for feeding me. I haven't eaten since yesterday."

 

I stopped on the way off the ship, ordered bread and cheese to be given to the boy adding ale for him to drink. I stated that the boy was not to leave the ship and no one was to molest him in any way, the latter order given because I knew a few of my men would use any hole available, but I also knew that my instructions would be obeyed.

 

My mind kept reminding me of the body I had helped to wash. And while I was not completely erect, there was a definite tightening. By the time I reached the merchant's, I was determined to get the truth.

 

"Captain, nice to see you. What can I do for you?"

 

"For starters, Spender, you can show me the boy's contract. He claims to have completed his service a year ago."

 

"He lies. They all lie. You aren't going to take the word of an indentured servant over mine, are you?"

 

"You have his contract, do you not? If you wish me to take him as partial payment then I have the right to his contract."

 

"Of course, Captain. Give me a moment to locate it."

 

I paced the shop impatiently as he went into the back. Several minutes had passed when he returned holding out the contract to me. I unrolled it carefully and knew instantly that he was lying to me. The parchment could not have been signed years ago. The ink was too fresh.

 

I raised my eyes to look at him, my knowledge making them darken I'm sure. Spender flinched back from me slightly. My temper being well known all up and down the coast, I'm sure he was expecting the back of my hand.

 

"We will be honest with each other here. This parchment is a lie."

 

"I swear…"

 

"Do not swear to me!"

 

My voice roared through the small shop, making the other patrons jump. His face flamed. I controlled my temper with no small effort.

 

"I will offer you a deal of another type. I will forgive your debt to me. In exchange you will give me the proper parchment and give Mulder a fair price on the girl he desires to purchase from you."

 

I could see the wheels turning in Spender's brain as he contemplated my offer. I knew the exact moment he decided to accept. The man's greed would someday be his downfall. We both knew his debt to me to be greater than the price he had paid for the boy's contract new. And he would still make money from Mulder on the girl.

 

"You strike a hard bargain, Captain. I accept."

 

He held out his hand and I shook to seal the deal.

 

"Well, let me just get you the parchment you desire."

 

He disappeared in the back and came out this time with a parchment of a proper age, having a date just over eight years past. I nodded my acceptance and tucked both parchments under my arm.

 

"I'll send Mulder around to make his payment for the girl. See that she is ready to leave with him."

 

"Aye, Captain. I'll see to it."

 

My next stop was a clothier to get proper clothing for the boy. I suppose I could have asked if Alexei had any clothing left at the merchant's but I wanted nothing he wore to remind him of that place. I hurriedly picked clothing I thought would suit him.

 

I suddenly realized that I had not looked at his feet so I had no clue as to the size of them. I decided he would just have to wear a pair of my boots until we could get him properly shod.

 

I hurried back to the ship, ignoring the crowds around me, including the whores and their bawdy invitations. Most days I wanted nothing to do with them and today even less. It never occurred to me to wonder at my urge to get back to him, my desire to be with him, to see him in the green shirt that I had purchased for him.

 

Most days I would have lingered on the docks, enjoying the sights of so many different types of people, the rich mixing with the poor, people from many places, the air smelling of salt, the languages of trade and barter, but not that day. I did stop long enough to buy crabs for our dinner. The boy needed some meat on his bones.

 

Mulder was on deck when I reached the ship. He was directing the loading of some cargo for our home port. I motioned for him to come over to me.

 

"Mulder, how close are we to being loaded?"

 

"We should have everything on board this time tomorrow, Captain."

 

"Spender will expect to see you tonight. He will have the girl you wanted ready for you. Should he try to charge you too much, remind him that we have a deal."

 

"How did you know about the girl?"

 

"Alexei told me. You still want her, do you not?"

 

"Yes, Captain."

 

"I suggest that you bring her on board under cover of darkness. 'Tis best if the men do not know a woman is on board. I trust you can impress on her the importance of staying in your cabin until we reach port?"

 

"Be assured, Captain, I will make it clear to her. Does this mean you settled the ownership issue with him?"

 

"Aye. We came to an understanding."

 

"The boy was lying, then?"

 

"No, he was not."

 

"Then he is free?"

 

"Yes. But I think he will go with us anyway."

 

Mulder grinned in a way that boded ill for my temper.

 

"A cabin boy at last, Captain?"

 

"He shall make his own place eventually. I think, for now 'tis best to get him out of Spender's reach. Would you ask the cook to steam these for our dinner?"

 

"Certainly, Captain. Need anything else? Some oil, perhaps?"

 

"Mulder, should I ever decide to take a boy to my bed, I'll be sure to inform you."

 

I turned on my heel and walked away from him, ignoring the startled look on his face. I reached my cabin to find Alexei watching the activity on the docks through the porthole. He turned to face me as I entered.

 

"Here, boy, I've brought you something to wear."

 

He moved toward me, taking the bundle of clothing and opening it carefully on the bed. His eyes looked at me with wonder as he touched the clothing as if it would vanish.

 

******

 

I had been standing watching the swell of humanity on the dock as I waited for the Captain to return. I had spent the time wondering what my fate would be when that happened. At least, if Spender convinced him I was still property, I would now belong to someone who would feed me and let me wash.

 

My life would be better than before in that regard at least. I did wonder if he would want to use me, not that it mattered. What's one more man among many? At least this one would be clean.

 

When the door opened, I turned to see him standing there with a bundle under his arm, parchments clutched in his hand. He must have come from the opposite end of the dock; I had not seen him returning. He smiled at me before he spoke.

 

"Here, boy, I've brought you something to wear."

 

I took the bundle, placed it on the bed, and opened it carefully. The clothing was of good quality, far better than any I had ever owned. I touched it carefully; afraid I was being teased. I turned to look at him but he just had a small smile on his lips.

 

"These are for me? These things are too fine for a bondsman to wear."

 

"They're not too fine for a free man to wear."

 

"Free?"

 

"Yes, Alexei, free."

 

He handed me the parchments and I rolled open the oldest looking one, seeing my name, the only words I knew how to read at that time, on it.

 

"How? He admitted he lied to you?"

 

"Not at first. But he needs me and he knows that. Get dressed, boy. I want to see if I judged your size correctly."

 

"If I'm truly a free man, will you stop calling me boy?"

 

"It was not meant as an insult; you are quite a bit younger than I am. I shall endeavor to call you Alexei."

 

"Thank you, Captain."

 

"Walter, in private only. In front of the crew, you must be formal."

 

"Thank you, Walter, for everything."

 

"There is one thing, Alexei."

 

I steeled myself waiting to hear the price for my freedom and the clothing. He looked at me puzzled before he continued.

 

"I don't think it would be safe for you to stay here. Spender might try to enslave you again. I offer you passage to my homeport. A job with my family's company."

 

"That's it? You don't want me to…"

 

"Want you to what? Ye gads, not you, too! No, you do not have to give me your body."

 

I heard his words but I had also seen his eyes when he watched me earlier. His mind might not admit his desires, but his body knew them. I had been used for too many years to miss the telltale signs. Maybe I had been mistaken...one-way to find out.

 

I dropped the robe.

 

He looked away, but before I had picked up the breeches to pull them on, his eyes were back. It was not my face he stared at as I pulled them up over my hips. I covered my smile by pulling on the shirt, noting that the green was an almost exact match for my eyes.

 

Turning back toward him and catching the hunger in his eyes, I almost hoped he would want me. I knew right then I wanted him, and I had never wanted any of the men who used me. My only pleasure had come from my own hand.

 

I finished dressing, then looked down at my bare feet and wiggled my toes. He laughed briefly.

 

"It's easier to guess about clothes than shoes. You'll have to make do with a pair of mine until we can get you shod properly."

 

He walked to a trunk and opened it. The boots he handed me were old, but still clean and sturdy. Stockings he handed to me as well. I sat and pulled them on and found the boots to be a passable fit, just a little wide.

 

******

 

Damn but the boy cleaned up well. No wonder Spender's guests wanted him in their beds. For the first time in my life I wondered what it would be like to have a boy in my bed. Suddenly, the idea of sleeping in close quarters with the boy in my cabin that night, did not seem like a good idea.

 

"Come, Alexei, I have some things to do in town. We'll have dinner there. We'll pick you up a change of clothing as well as see about boots."

 

He nodded and I led him up on deck. I called out to Mulder and he hurried to my side.

 

"Mulder, I've decided to do a few things ashore. Alexei and I will eat there and probably stay at an inn tonight. You may have the crabs for your dinner. Put Moore in charge when you go to the merchant's."

 

I watched Mulder's eyes track past me to the boy and saw his surprise. Yes, the boy did clean up well. I gave him no time for comments, just headed to the gangplank with the boy close on my heels.

 

I kept a close eye on Alexei as we made our way through the crowds on the docks. I had to shove my hand in my mouth when he blushed at the advances of the whores. With one so pretty, they made so bold as to brush against him. Finally, I took pity on him and shooed them away.

 

I took him to a different clothier and watched his eyes light up when presented with all the choices. He had so much difficulty making a decision that I stepped in.

 

"We'll take them all. Send them to my ship and instruct my crew to place them in my cabin for the time being. Also, he will need a sea chest. Do you have a sturdy one?"

 

"Of course, Captain. Would you like to choose one?"

 

"Let the boy…Alexei see them."

 

I watched as he looked at the chests being offered. He tested the lids carefully, then turned to me.

 

"Captain, this one seems to be the best quality of the lot."

 

I moved forward and tested the chest myself and found his judgement to be accurate.

 

"Pack your things in it and it will be sent to the ship."

 

I saw his eyes widen when the shopkeeper gave me the total and I paid without a murmur. The price was fair, but I think again he was waiting for the ultimate price he would be forced to pay. For a moment I was sad that life had taught him to see it that way, until I realized that if his life had been different, he would not be standing here with me. And I knew in that clarity of time that I wanted him by my side.

 

We didn't have good fortune at the boot makers. He had nothing ready that would fit, and could not have any made in time before we sailed.

 

"Captain, it doesn't matter. These will do fine unless you will need them."

 

"No, Alexei, I do not need them. If they are comfortable then consider them yours. At the next port we'll have time to get you some made."

 

We ate a decent dinner at the inn I had been staying in while in port. I left him for a brief time to use the privy, and returned to find Spender smiling an evil smile as he talked to the boy.

 

******

 

It had been the most extraordinary day of my life. First, I had been taken to a ship where I expected to be used cruelly, only to find the Captain a reasonable man. He had seen me clean and clothed, had gone to Spender to check on my claim and come back to announce me a free man, had offered me a job.

 

I was sitting in the common room waiting for him to come back from the privy when I heard a hated voice.

 

"Well, well, what is this? The bondsman cleaned up and looking like a dandy."

 

"I'm a free man. The Captain has been kind enough to give me clothing to wear. He has made the offer of a job as well."

 

"Job? Is that what it's called now. Do you really think he wants you for anything other than that ass of yours? Face it, boy, that's all you have to offer."

 

"He's made no move to use me as your guests did."

 

"Make no mistake, boy, with what he paid for you, he will get around to it."

 

My heart pounded at these words. Was the Captain lying to me? Did he plan to recoup his money in the room he had rented for the night?

 

"He's not like you, Spender. He has shown nothing but kindness."

 

"Kindness too, has a price."

 

We both jumped as Walter's voice came from behind.

 

"Maybe with you, Spender. I, however, do what I feel is right. The boy will pay me back by the labor he will give to my company. He will not have a lot in the first year, but what he has will be his. As for the boy's ass…that is his to give or withhold as *he* sees fit. I have not asked and he has not offered."

 

"You expect me to believe that you forgave my debt to you so he could be free? And you don't want payment from him?"

 

"Believe what you wish, Spender. The boy has my actions to speak to him. Now, shouldn't you be meeting with Mulder?"

 

"You're right. I'll go complete my transaction with him. I'll see you the next time you are in port."

 

"I think you will be dealing with Mulder the next time our ship sails this way. He has proven his abilities, and I promised him his own ship. He will be having a woman to care for and no doubt she will produce heirs for him. He'll need the extra income."

 

"Well, then, I best make a good impression in my dealings with him this night. Safe journey, Captain."

 

"Goodbye, Spender."

 

I watched until Spender was out of sight then turned to look at the Captain.

 

"Walter, did you mean the things you said?"

 

"Of course, Alexei. You will find me to be a man of my word."

 

"Including the part about my…"

 

"Most especially that part, Alexei. Men have no control over many things in this world but they should at least control that."

 

"Thank you, Walter."

 

There was more I wanted to say but wasn't sure enough of the situation to say it. When he offered me a drink, I accepted. He asked me of my home and family as we drank. I had never had wine before and it quickly went to my head. I suddenly found the world to be a funny place...until she came over to us.

 

When the whore draped herself on his lap, he laughed and patted her ass but sent her on her way with a coin that made her smile. I smiled as well since he wasn't going off with her and leaving me alone. He seemed to realize that I was drunk when I dropped the mug while holding it out to be filled.

 

"Come on, boy. You need to sleep. I can see it now; you'll still be hanging over the rail when we sail tomorrow."

 

He hauled me to my feet, and when I couldn't walk, he laughed again and threw me over his shoulder like a bag of feed. In the room, he laid me out on the bed. His hands stripped me efficiently, and for a moment I thought Spender was right. But he just rolled me under the covers and told me to sleep.

 

But I didn't want to sleep. I wanted to show him my appreciation for all he had done for me that day. So I smiled what I thought would be a seductive smile and pulled him down into a kiss.

 

******

 

I knew the boy was drunk but never expected him to grab me as he did. His lips were soft under mine and he opened to accept me. For a moment I was drunk on him, so I drank of the sweet nectar he offered me. When I pulled back, he looked at me with his emotions running the gamut from fear to desire. His hand slipped along my body to find the evidence of my arousal.

 

Damn! I would be no better than Spender if I used this boy while he was drunk. Besides, I knew he had no great desire for an old man like me. He just let Spender's words get to him. I pulled away from him violently and saw the fear take over in his eyes.

 

"I have something to take care of. I'll be back. Stay here."

 

The fear became terror, and I knew I had to reassure him. I sat down on the edge of the bed and smoothed the covers over him.

 

"Alexei, I won't be long, I promise. I'm not angry with you. Sleep. The voyage starts tomorrow and it will be a hard first day for you. I shouldn't have let you drink that way. Trust me, and do not leave this room while I'm away. Do I have your word?"

 

"You would believe my word?"

 

"I believed it enough to go to Spender, did I not?"

 

"Walter, I give my word I will stay here until you bid me leave."

 

"Thank you, Alexei. Now sleep."

 

I rose and left him there. My body raging with the desire he had kindled in me, I went in search of someone to ease my needs. The whore who had approached me earlier was still in the common room. I waved to her and she smiled as she threaded her way across the room to me.

 

I took her quickly in the alley behind the inn. Paid her extra when she complained of my size. I think I was her first customer of the night, otherwise she probably wouldn't have noticed. But the woman only banked the fire, so I moved through the night seeking another body to spend myself in.

 

I found myself in an area of the docks I did not normally frequent. The boy who approached me looked younger than Alexei but he had dark hair. In the dark, if he didn't speak, I could pretend.

 

"Captain, need some company?"

 

"Silent company."

 

"No problem, Captain. I have a room."

 

I nodded and followed him to the 'room' in the corner of a stable near by. I watched as he undressed and positioned his body. He handed me a vial of oil and waited for me to begin. I had never been with a boy before but it didn't take genius to figure out what to do with the oil.

 

I removed my clothing, not wishing to stain it, and then slicked my cock. I moved between the boy's legs and entered him awkwardly, his hiss of breath telling me I had hurt him. I pulled back and watched as the tension in his body eased.

 

"I don't want to hurt you, but I've never done this before."

 

He looked over his shoulder at me in surprise, but said nothing. Then I remembered I had told him I wanted silence.

 

"It's all right to talk to me now, just be silent once I'm going."

 

"Well, Sir, a man endowed as you are should take it slowly. My hole needs to adjust. I don't have many men as big as you. I don't think I've ever had a man big as you."

 

"Go slowly. Anything else?"

 

"Don't try and put it all in at once. Rock in and pull out, each time going a little deeper. I actually enjoy it when it's done that way."

 

I nodded and the boy turned back to his former position. I did as he had suggested and soon was buried to the hilt in him with no further tensing of his body.

 

I closed my eyes and imagined myself buried in Alexei's body. Holding his hips, I picked up speed but the boy was rocking back to receive me and the faint noises he was making were far from pain. I felt a shift in him and opened my eyes long enough to realize he had shifted so he could work his own cock.

 

I closed my eyes again and lost myself in the fantasy of Alexei on his knees for me that way. But suddenly the fantasy shifted and I was on my knees receiving Alexei deep into my body. I felt my body tighten as I wished I were with him, giving him the pleasure others had taken from him.

 

My climax rippled through my body. I felt the boy spasm around me and moaned low with the pleasure of it. I had never felt like this with a woman. I guess Mulder was right; I did want a boy. I clutched the boy tighter to me, pressing full against him, the two of us bent over on the pallet.

 

When I could breathe again, I pulled out of him. I dressed hurriedly, my mind in turmoil. He watched me without a word. I pulled a gold coin out of my purse. It was ten times the amount he had asked for.

 

"Thank you."

 

His eyes revealed his surprise, both at the size of the coin and my words.

 

"Sir, I thank you but if I flash a coin like this, someone is bound to think I stole it."

 

I looked at him and knew he was telling the truth. So I emptied my purse and counted out smaller coins to equal the gold coin. When I handed them to him, he kissed my hand.

 

It was getting late, so I hurried back to the inn and the boy waiting there. He was sleeping, so I undressed quietly and slipped into bed next to him. He rolled toward me and I followed my inclination, letting him nestle against me. His warm body felt comforting after the chill of the fog outside.

 

******

 

I roused enough to know he had returned. I turned toward him and let my warm body rest against his. When he didn't push me away, I went back to sleep.

 

I woke the next morning with my head pounding and my bladder complaining. A large hairy leg was resting between my legs. My head was on his shoulder, his arm holding me close, a big hand held my ass firmly.

 

I told my bladder to shut up and stayed still, not wanting to leave his warmth. I slowly became aware of the odors on him, the aftermath of sex. So that was where he had gone. Part of me raged at the idea he had left my offer to seek his comfort elsewhere. But the more logical part of my mind reminded me that I owed him everything and he owed me nothing.

 

I snuggled in closer to him, rubbing my morning erection against his hairy thigh. He made a little snorting snuffle as his hand squeezed my ass, pulling me closer. The covers began to rise as his body climbed toward wakefulness.

 

Since my arm was already wrapped around him, I slid my hand down to assist with the process his body had started. I bit down hard on my lip to stop the gasp as I found him to be much larger than any man who had ever used me.

 

He turned toward me, pulling his leg from between mine, his other arm wrapping round me, his other leg lifting over my hip. That put our cocks rubbing against each other. By that point I was feeling a lust I had never felt before. When he began to rut against me, I responded in kind.

 

The pressure low in my groin told me I would not last long. I had never felt such pleasure before. His big hands were kneading my ass as he thrust against me. His mouth had found my nipple somehow and the sensation was a sharp jolt that hissed along my nerves to center in my crotch.

 

When he bit me, I moaned and shot my seed between us. He was not far behind me. I felt each jerk as his seed joined mine.

 

His head raised, his eyes opened and I saw the puzzlement, the shock. What had been a turning point in my life was little more than a wet dream to him.

 

******

 

I had been dreaming, or at least I thought I had. I opened my eyes to see smoky green eyes watching me. I could feel the stickiness between out bodies. I realized I had a handful of his naked ass. Examining him, I could see the mark my 'dream' biting had made on his chest.

 

What had I done? After all my promises to him, here he lay in my arms, covered with the evidence of my completion. How would he ever trust me again?

 

I pulled back from him hurriedly and saw…was that pain? Had I hurt him? I had obviously taken idiocy to a new level.

 

"Alexei, I'm sorry. I was dreaming. Please forgive me."

 

"There is nothing to forgive, Walter. It isn't just your seed covering us."

 

I touched the bite mark gently.

 

"I bit you."

 

"It didn't hurt."

 

"Still, you did not offer yourself to me. I have broken my word to you."

 

"I offered last night."

 

"But last night you were drunk. Men often do things when they are drunk that they regret the next morn. That did not give me the right."

 

"You did not force me. I would have made my offer with or without the wine. I owe you for your kindness."

 

"No, boy. You do not owe me that. Your debt will be repaid with your labor when we arrive at my home."

 

I rose from the bed, walked over to the washstand and poured some water into the basin. I washed the evidence of my stupidity from my belly, then rinsed the rag and took it back to him. He had turned his back to me, hugging his body as if cold.

 

"Boy, are you all right?"

 

"I asked you not to call me boy."

 

His voice sounded ragged.

 

"I'm sorry. Seems I can't do anything right with you."

 

"You've given me my freedom, clothing to wear, filled my belly and gave me pleasure. That's far more than any other man ever did for me."

 

Pleasure? Did he mean that? It didn't matter. He was only feeling grateful. Once he truly felt free, he would find someone younger, better looking, to share his bed.

 

"Here, Alexei, clean up: we need to get a move on. Today is going to be busy."

 

He took the cloth and wiped at his stomach. We dressed in silence before heading to the ship.

 

******

 

I walked beside him to the ship, lost in my thoughts. He didn't want me. Was I that hideous? Or was it just the fact that he knew I had been so well used and he didn't want a whore in his bed?

 

Years later, he would tell me his thoughts on that day. I was amazed that he did not understand that I loved him from the moment he said he would go and talk to Spender. Everything he gave me after that was just bonus.

 

My head throbbed, the sunlight hurt, and the moment we stepped on board the ship the rocking sent me running for the rail. I heard the laughter behind me as I heaved over the side. I felt a warm hand on my back, rubbing gently as I continued to try and empty an already empty stomach.

 

When the heaving stopped, he spoke.

 

"Why don't you go to my cabin and lie down. Keep your eyes closed and do not look out the porthole. That will only make it worse. Try to sleep."

 

"Aye, captain."

 

I walked unsteadily across the deck and down to his cabin. Since I didn't want to wrinkle the clothing he'd bought me, I undressed before crawling into the bunk. I didn't expect to sleep, but the next thing I knew he was opening the door and talking softly to Mulder before he entered the cabin.

 

"So, it went well with Spender? He didn't try to cheat you?"

 

"No, he gave her to me for a fair price. He hinted that we would be doing business in the future."

 

"Aye. I told him you had earned your own ship. I want to settle down. I'm getting too old to spend all my life at sea."

 

"Going to find a wife and have children?"

 

"I haven't really given that any thought. My brothers have already seen to it that the family name will be passed on. I just want to try something new."

 

"I'm sure the boy would help you try something new."

 

"Mulder, will you let it go? Why do you keep harping on this subject?"

 

"You didn't see the way the boy looked at you when you left the ship with him yesterday. You've attained the status of a god with him."

 

"He will get over thinking I'm a god before the voyage is over. Mulder, the boy has been ill-used. Once he has had some time as a free man, I'm sure he will find someone to love. He's a beautiful boy. Anyone would be lucky to have him in their bed."

 

"Captain, somehow I think you're mistaken. I think you should ask yourself why you forgave such a debt. Was it just to free the boy? Or did he touch your heart? I think if you gave him the option, it would be your bed he'd want to warm. I must go check on Dana. Thank you for your help with Spender and for deciding I'm ready for my own ship."

 

"You're welcome, Mulder. I'll see you in the morning."

 

He closed the door and placed the candle he was carrying on the table. I pretended to be asleep, not wanting him to know I had heard his conversation. I watched as he undressed. When he crowded into the bunk with me, I allowed him to move me as he wanted. His bunk was larger than on most ships but we still had to spoon together to fit.

 

I fell back to sleep with the sound of his breathing in my ear and one of his hands wrapped securely around my waist. When I woke the next morning, he was gone, but there was warm water waiting and I blessed him for that. I washed, then got dressed and went to find Walter.

 

When I reached the deck, it took me a while to spot him. He was dressed less formally than I had seen him in the preceding two days. But if anything, the lack of a fancy wig and formal coat only heightened my desire for him.

 

He was climbing through the rigging and I held my breath as I watched. Having only been on a ship once before, and then only as part of steerage, I knew very little of how they ran. But I admit to surprise, since I always thought of Captains as the men who gave orders but did no real work. Before the voyage was over, I would learn that Walter was indeed very different from most Captains.

 

He climbed back down to the deck and exchanged some words with one of his men. Seeing me standing across the deck, he made his way to me.

 

"You look much better this morning. How are you feeling?"

 

"I'm fine, Captain. I slept well. Thank you for seeing that I had water to wash."

 

He smiled and my heart sped up.

 

"Well, my men know to bring hot water in the morning. Good thing you didn't sleep much later or it would have been cold. Now, then what shall we give you to do?"

 

"Do, Captain?"

 

"Yes, do. Might as well start working off your debt now. Have you been on a ship other than your trip here from the old country?"

 

"No, Captain. But I'm willing to learn anything to help out."

 

He turned then and called out to Mulder.

 

"Mulder, what do you think we can teach our young friend here to do? Don't want to keep him in the sun too long. His hide needs to toughen up first."

 

"Not sure, Captain. Do you know what he did for Spender?"

 

They both turned to look at me then, waiting for an answer. My face flamed, since my main value to Spender had consisted of spreading my legs for his guests. But I had helped in the kitchen on occasion as well as with the laundry.

 

"I mostly helped cook and wash laundry, Captain."

 

"Don't think we need you at either of those tasks. Although I will let you see to my laundry when you do your own. Ever use a needle?"

 

"Yes, Captain. Not frequently as Spender thought my work too sloppy."

 

"Mulder, introduce him to Paddy and let him learn to repair a sail. That way he won't have to be in the direct sun and Paddy will be pleased to have the company."

 

"Aye, Captain. Come with me, Alexei. Paddy will be glad of the help."

 

"Mulder, remind the crew that he is off limits."

 

"Aye, Captain, I'll do that."

 

I wondered what he meant by that but didn't ask. Mulder led me to a toothless old man who was sitting in the shade of some crates stacked on the deck.

 

"Paddy, this is Alexei. Captain wants the boy to have something to keep him busy so he thought he might give you a hand."

 

"This the boy you brought back from Spender's?"

 

"Aye, 'tis he."

 

"Cleans up good, don't he? You had any 'perience with sails?"

 

"No, but I learn fast."

 

"Have a seat, I'll show you what to do."

 

I sat and Mulder wandered off. For the next couple of hours, I began learning what I would one day consider my first real man's job. Paddy seemed to be pleased with my skill with a needle.

 

When Paddy suggested a break and some food, I followed to the galley. We were eating and discussing the work for the afternoon when a hand grabbed my arm.

 

"When did the pretty boy come aboard? Captain finally decide to take on a cabin boy?"

 

"Let me go!"

 

"Ah, come on, pretty boy, you can give me a few minutes. The Captain doesn't have to know."

 

"This one's off limits, Granger. Did ya not hear? He's the Captain's private piece." Another man was tugging at Granger's arm, trying to pull him away from me.

 

"I'm no one's *piece*! Now, let me go." I tried to snatch my arm away from him but his grip tightened.

 

"Why else would the Captain bring a pretty boy like you aboard? I heard he gave Spender the full price of your contract for you. Stitching sails with Paddy won't pay him back for that. I wondered when the Captain would find someone to warm his bed. Come on, be sociable, the Captain will never miss what I take."

 

"You're wrong about that." The voice cut through the galley like a whip. I saw Granger flinch as he dropped my arm like it was molten lead.

 

"Captain, I was just pulling the boy's leg. Didn't mean anything by it."

 

"Understand this, Granger, and the rest of you as well. The boy is off limits. Anyone molesting him in any way will answer to me. Is that understood?"

 

"Aye, Captain." Granger grabbed a piece of bread and hurriedly left the galley. Walter came over to where Paddy and I were sitting.

 

"Steer clear of that one, Alexei. I don't think he will defy my order now that I've told him directly but I'm not sure. Paddy, how did the young one do today?"

 

"He has a talented hand, Cap'n. We got most of the repair done."

 

"Good! I think he's had enough sun for today. Alexei, would you tidy the cabin after you finish eating?"

 

"But, Captain, I was in the shade."

 

"You get more light than you realize even in the shade on a ship. Trust me on this, Alexei, and do as I ask."

 

"Aye, Captain."

 

I watched as he took his own crust of bread and a slice of cheese before leaving the galley. I wanted to ask about his arrangements with Spender but knew that was best asked in private. I turned to look at Paddy.

 

"Does the whole crew think I'm here as the Captain's bed warmer?"

 

"Aye, some are thinking that, but not all. I've known him since he was a lad younger than you. He's never had a cabin boy. I've heard him say 'twas cause he didn't want a boy abused on his ship. Course, you are older than most cabin boys."

 

"I heard Mulder ask if the Captain was going to find a wife in home port. Has he never been married, then?"

 

"No, never. Came close once, but she ran off with someone with more money."

 

Money? Was the woman insane? If he wanted me, I wouldn't even look at anyone else. Paddy and I ate the rest of our meal in silence. I followed Paddy back on deck to retrieve my shirt, it was a warm day and I had left it on deck. I bid him goodbye and made my way back toward the Captain's cabin.

 

I saw Granger watching as I crossed the deck. I wasn't surprised when he made a comment behind my back.

 

"Captain doesn't want to share his boy. Time will come, boy. I get what I want."

 

My back stiffened and I almost turned but decided it would be best to let Walter handle it. I entered the Captain's cabin and looked around, wondering what needed to be tidied. I straightened the bedding that I had left bunched up earlier that day. I noticed his dirty clothing where he had left it and added my own to it for washing as soon as I found out how that was done on board ship.

 

******

 

I sent the boy to my cabin after the incident in the galley. It bothered me how territorial I had felt when I saw Granger holding his arm. He wasn't mine and never would be. But at the same time he didn't want Granger's attentions and I would not let him be abused on my ship.

 

I told myself the only reason I let him stay in my bunk the night before was that I didn't want to wake him. I had planned to let him bunk in with the men for the rest of the journey, but after that incident, I knew that was not possible. I would just have to find some way to cope with him lying next to me at night. I was determined not to repeat my actions of the night at the inn.

 

I arranged for enough dinner to be brought to my cabin for us both that night, thinking to keep him out of sight for a while. Little did I know I was just setting myself up to fall hopelessly in love with the boy. I opened the door of the cabin to find him sitting in the chair holding the two parchments in his hand

 

"Alexei, our dinner will be brought in a short while."

 

He jumped slightly, and I could tell he had been so deep in thought that he hadn't heard me come in. He rolled the parchments up hastily and put them back on my chest.

 

"Alexei, those are yours to do with as you please. You may put them in your chest if you wish."

 

"I'd rather burn them."

 

"You want to put it out of your mind? I can understand that. But think about it a while. They represent a part of your history. There is no shame in an indentured service period."

 

"Not if you spend it in the fields or at honest labor. But when you spend it warming beds…"

 

"You are not to blame for the duties your master gave you."

 

"Duties?"

 

Alexei's mouth twisted in a sneer that was like a physical blow to me. Before I knew what I was doing, my hand was cupping his face and my thumb rubbing over his lip to smooth it out. Our eyes met and locked and I saw what Mulder meant about the boy's feeling for me. But I still believed at that point that he would forget me once he had a taste of freedom.

 

"Do not frown so. You did what was forced upon you. You were a boy and had no control. But now you are a free man and you can make your life what you wish."

 

"Who would want me after I've been a whore? You've made it clear that I'm not good enough to service you."

 

"Alexei, I would be no better than Spender if I used you. You feel gratitude toward me. That is all. Had you been free all this time, you would not have looked twice at me."

 

"But you eased your needs with another when I was in your bed, had offered myself to you." I could hear the puzzlement in the voice and see it in the eyes.

 

"Alexei, I would not use you as Spender's 'guests' did. It has never been my way to use one who has no choice. You are here on my ship and that puts you in a position that may make you feel beholden. I tell you again, you owe me nothing except your labor to cover your upkeep. That is all you owe me or any man, now."

 

"You're wrong, Walter. I would have certainly looked at you more than twice. And what I feel for you has nothing to do with gratitude and everything to do with how you make me feel when you are near."

 

I was about to answer when there was a knock at the door. I realized that I had continued to rub Alexei's lip as we talked and dropped my hand quickly. We were both silent as we ate our dinner. Once the dishes were taken away, I spoke to him again.

 

"You should go to bed, Alexei. I must make my last round for the night. I'll try to be quiet when I return so that I don't wake you."

 

"Shouldn't I go sleep with the rest of the crew?"

 

"Considering Granger's behavior today, I don't think that is a good idea."

 

"They all think I'm here to warm your bed."

 

"Some think that, not all."

 

"Mulder thinks it."

 

"Mulder has strange fixations. But he's good at his job. Does it bother you overly much for them to think what we know is untrue?"

 

"Since they all know about me, I guess I can't really expect them to think anything different. Will you tell your family what I am?"

 

I scowled at him then and saw the shadow pass over his eyes. Spender should be shot for having treated the boy so badly. Good thing we had sailed or I'd have been tempted to do just that.

 

"What you are is a free man, Alexei. I see no reason to tell them anything other than you needed a change and I offered you work. The past cannot be undone, nor does it need to be hidden, but I see no reason to announce your past. Many people would judge you based on that. I want you to have a fresh start."

 

"But what of the men on the ship?"

 

"The crew and my family do not socialize. Mulder is the only one who could possibly give them that information, but I do not think that likely."

 

"Why is that?"

 

"Because he will not wish for Dana's past to be known by them since that would mean his family knowing. His mother is very devout and would never accept a daughter-in-law who had that type of past."

 

"Thank you."

 

"You're welcome. Go to bed."

 

******

 

I watched him close the door behind him, not sure what twist of fate had brought me to him, but I was pleased all the same. I undressed and slid into the bunk.

 

My thoughts on the new life I was headed toward were filled with hope. If anything, his generosity made me more determined to be the kind of man he believed I could be. I drifted to sleep in the warmth of his bunk. The next morning I woke to the feel of his hardness nestled between my cheeks.

 

I smiled and stayed very still. I knew he must still be asleep and didn't want to disturb his dream. If that dream ended with him inside me I wouldn't protest. Part of me hoped it would. My smile grew as he mumbled something, while tightening his hold on me.

 

His cock poked against me, the tip pushing part way inside me. I held my breath, waiting. What might have happened next was not to be.

 

A shout brought us both upright in his bunk. I looked at him confused.

 

"A ship's been spotted, could be pirates. Get dressed."

 

He was already out of the bed, pulling his breeches over his hips. I scrambled out of the bunk, grabbing for my own clothes. He was out the door before I even found my boots. Racing onto the deck, I spotted him with the spyglass in his hands.

 

As I watched, he lowered the glass and turned to speak to Mulder. I couldn't hear the words but saw the urgency in both faces. Mulder nodded and turned to run from the fore deck. As he pounded past me, Walter motioned to me.

 

I climbed to where he was standing. He looked at me with worry in his eyes.

 

"I suppose it's too much to hope that you have any knowledge of weapons?"

 

"My father taught me a little before they sent me away."

 

"Go to my quarters; in the big sea chest you'll find my cutlasses; bring them quickly."

 

He thrust a key into my hand then turned and began issuing orders. I wasted no time in doing as he had instructed. Again I passed Mulder as he came back armed to the teeth. I hurried below; slamming the door open, I went to my knees by the chest.

 

When it was open, I moved the clothing to find two fine weapons in their own case. Grabbing them, I left the chest open, dashing back up to where Walter was still standing, barking out orders. I saw right away that all the sails were opened to catch the wind. He grabbed one of the swords from me.

 

"We're going to try to outrun them, but I have little hope of success, we're heavy with cargo. If we are boarded stay close."

 

I nodded. I stood close, but tried to stay out of his way as well. He watched as we drew away from the other ship, but our spurt of speed was short-lived. All too soon the other ship was overtaking us. I saw the look of determination that came over his features. I knew he would fight for his ship and all that was on it.

 

The first cannon shot missed, if hitting a sail can be called missing. The second took out part of the bow. I readied myself as best I could as Walter pulled a long knife from his belt, holding it in his left hand as he readied his cutlass in his right.

 

I prayed that I'd remember the things my father had taught me. And, if not, that my death would be quick. He glanced over to me once, giving me a quick grin. That alone bolstered my sprits. All too soon men were pouring over the side and the battle was on.

 

Either the men who came at me were not good fighters, or I remembered more than I thought. I kept as close to Walter's back as I could. I had several cuts but was managing to stay on my feet when I heard a roar near by and Walter dropped behind me.

 

I turned to see how badly he was injured and felt a hard blow to my head. My last memory was falling toward him and never making contact.

 

When I woke, it was dark; I could tell I was still on board a ship, as the rocking added to the queasiness in my stomach. I heard a low moan and crawled toward the sound.

 

"Who's here?"

 

"Mulder. Is that you, Alexei?"

 

"Yes. I just woke. Is there anyone else here with us?"

 

"The Captain was but they took him out a while ago. I think most of the crew is dead."

 

"What of your Dana?"

 

"I don't know. If they've discovered her…"

 

His voice trailed off. We both knew what her fate was likely to be at the hands of the men who had boarded the ship.

 

"Could you tell how badly the Captain was hurt? He was down when I was knocked out but I couldn't tell how seriously he was injured."

 

"I don't think it was that bad. They'll try and keep him alive for ransom. We may not be that lucky. As a matter of fact, I'm surprised they didn't slit your throat."

 

Before I could respond, the grating above us was thrown open, and a much-hated voice called down to us.

 

"Looks like the Captain's piece is awake. That's good. Time for me to collect my due."

 

I cringed at the images the words brought to mind. I'd thought never to be in that position again. Closing my hands into fists, I resolved to deny him the pleasure of my begging or screaming. He would be the latest in a long line, I had survived many others, and I would survive him.

 

Mulder was not inclined to be quiet.

 

"Leave him be, Granger. How could you turn on the Captain this way? He gave you work when others wouldn't."

 

"Work! I shoulda had your place next to him. And then the way he threatened me in front of half the crew. They won't let me do nothing to him cause they want to ransom him but they don't care what I do to his whore."

 

I didn't fight as he pulled me from the hold. Mulder tried to rise up to fight him but his leg was too badly injured for him to do much. The man with Granger pushed him aside as if he were a child.

 

I was dizzy and having trouble standing, so they pushed me along. Finally, I was thrown down against a stack of burlap bags. My fine new breeches, no longer clean or so new, were yanked down and he was on me. I walled off my mind as my body was used. I'd managed quite well until I heard Walter's voice.

 

"Granger, it's me you hate. Do it to me, leave the boy alone."

 

His pain was harder to bear than the rape, but I wouldn't let Granger see that. I turned my head so I could see Walter standing where they were holding him, struggling to get to me. I tried to tell him with my eyes that I would be all right but he didn't seem to understand.

 

When Granger finished with me, several others took a turn. Walter's struggles stopped when he had exhausted his strength. But his eyes stayed on mine and that helped me more than he could ever know.

 

I lay there torn and bleeding when they were through. Another voice I hadn't heard before rang out then.

 

"Let the Captain see to his boy. Put them in one of the cabins."

 

Walter was released and he stumbled over to me. His hands shook as he helped me rise; he pulled the remains of my breeches up over my hips. I'm not sure who leaned harder on whom as we made our way to the cabin and were locked inside.

 

He got me onto the bunk and then searched for something to clean me with. There was a noise in the passageway and I heard a familiar voice.

 

"Your Cap'n said I could bring them some water." The door was opened and Paddy entered the cabin.

 

"Sorry I couldn't bring you warm water, Cap'n."

 

"Doesn't matter. Cool might be better for him."

 

Paddy put the bucket down next to the bunk. The man at the door grunted, then motioned for Paddy to leave. Paddy looked at me with sad eyes before he left the room and I knew he'd seen what they did to me. The door was re-locked.

 

Walter perched on the edge of the bunk.

 

"Alexei, I'm sorry, I couldn't stop them."

 

"Doesn't matter. They weren't the first and now they probably won't be the last. If you give me the cloth I'll clean myself up."

 

"Let me help you."

 

"There's no need. I've done it before."

 

"Please, Alexei. I need to see to you."

 

His eyes looked into mine, and I saw no disgust, no pity, just anger at what had been done to me. I let him help me out of the breeches and turned my back as he began to clean my body. The cool water did feel good as he washed away the evidence of my rape.

 

He didn't stop with just that. After he threw out the basin of bloody water, he got a new cloth and carefully cleaned my entire body. Digging through the sea chest in the corner, he found me a clean pair of breeches, some instinct telling him I wouldn't want to be totally naked right then.

 

"Try to sleep, Alexei. I'll be here if you need me."

 

I moved so that my back was pressed against the bulkhead, and pulled the blanket around me. Before my mind allowed me to escape into sleep, I spoke to him.

 

"Thank you for offering to take my place."

 

He made a strangled sounding groan, but said nothing in return.

 

******

 

I sat and watched him sleep. I was amazed that he had dropped off so quickly. Years later I would realize that the whole thing bothered me more than him. He'd become so accustomed to being used that way that mentally he still felt it was all he was good for.

 

As for me, I was in some pain. I had a lump on the back of my head; the blood had dried and matted the little hair I had left, and my vision was blurry. I was slumped against the wall dozing when I heard his voice.

 

"Walter, you should get up."

 

Opening my eyes, I looked up to see him standing next to me. I wondered if I'd ever get a chance to see him when he wasn't sporting bruises and cuts.

 

"You should be sleeping."

 

"You snore when you sleep slumped over that way. Come get on the bunk."

 

"No, you need the comfort of the bed more than I. I'll try to find a position so I don't snore."

 

"We've slept together before, no reason not to now. We'll just have to be careful of each other's injuries."

 

I raised my hand to touch the back of my head carefully. His eyes tracked my movement.

 

"Is your head injured? Let me look at it."

 

"You probably won't be able to see much with just the moonlight."

 

"Let me try."

 

I stood and swayed slightly and he reached out to steady me. I turned in the small space to allow the moonlight to bathe my back. He touched me carefully, and there was little additional pain. I smiled as he cursed while searching for a bit of cloth to dip into the water he poured into the basin.

 

He washed the blood away gently. And I jumped a little when he kissed the area above the wound.

 

"My mother used to do that when I was hurt."

 

"Mine, too."

 

"If it's all right, I want to be closest to the bulkhead."

 

"That's fine."

 

He crawled into the bunk, pressed against the hull and waited for me to join him. Spooned together, he wrapped his arm around my waist.

 

"Alexei, I'll get my family to ransom you as well."

 

"I'm not worth that. Best try and free Mulder. That is if he lives. His wounds looked severe. I don't think being in that dank hold will help any."

 

"We'll all get out of here, Alexei. One way or another."

 

"I just wish…"

 

"Wish what, Alexei?"

 

"That you'd taken what I offered at the inn. At least I'd have a good memory to take with me."

 

"I couldn't use you that way."

 

"Was that whore better than me? Is it because of Spender?"

 

I pulled away and turned carefully to face him. There was enough moonlight coming in the porthole for us to see each other.

 

"Alexei, I know you do not believe me now, but one day you'll know I speak true. You are far too beautiful to be used as a whore. Spender was stupid and mean to treat you as he did. When your life is better and you've lived as you wish for a while, you'll know all you feel for me is gratitude."

 

"You're a good man, Walter. Remember me."

 

Before I could think of a reply he'd turned his back to me, his body trembling. I could think of nothing that wouldn't sound like platitudes or outright impossibilities, so I wrapped my arm around him. He sighed softly and relaxed into me.

 

I don't even know when we went to sleep.

 

For two days we saw only Paddy and the man who opened the door. We spent our time resting, not knowing what was coming but we both needed to heal. When we talked we did so quietly, so the guard wouldn't overhear. At night we slept close together, he in my arms or me in his.

 

One time we heard Granger's voice. I pushed Alexei behind me, determined to try and protect him if Granger came into the room.

 

"Open up, I want another piece of the boy."

 

"Captain gave orders they be left alone."

 

"He don't have to know. Hell, you can have some too, I ain't greedy."

 

"Maybe you're stupid enough to cross the Captain, but I ain't. Now get on your way."

 

"You know he let me have him on deck."

 

"I don't care what you did under the Captain's eyes. That's his business but he gave me orders and unless he changes them I'm not letting you in."

 

"Hey, pretty boy! You be safe for now but my turn'll come."

 

I turned to Alexei when I realized Granger wasn't getting in. Alexei was shaking, and at first I thought it was fear, but he raised his head and I saw the look in his eyes. His hands were clenched, his eyes shooting sparks, he was furious.

 

I silently thanked god for giving him that. To me it was a sign he was starting to believe my words.

 

"I guess the Captain is smarter than I thought. Maybe I should ask to speak with him."

 

"You should try and find out about Mulder and Dana."

 

"If they've found Dana she's probably been raped and murdered."

 

"Unless the Captain decided to keep her for himself."

 

"Is she pretty, then?" I had never seen her and did not know Mulder's preferences in bed partners.

 

"Quite pretty, a redhead with blue eyes. If I had been inclined that way I would have tried to bed her."

 

I nodded at him and went over to pound on the door. When the guard opened it, I used my most authoritative voice.

 

"Tell your Captain I wish to speak with him."

 

He nodded and closed the door. I heard a rumble of speech before I crossed back to sit next to Alexei on the bunk. It didn't take long for the Captain to come to the door. I was a little surprised that he had come below rather than sending for me.

 

"I understand you wish to talk to me?"

 

"Yes, my second in command was injured in the battle. Alexei told me that he is in the hold. I am thinking that you intend to ransom us since we were not killed outright. If so, you should get him out before his wounds taint and he dies."

 

"Someone would pay a ransom for him then?"

 

"Yes, his family has money. He sailed with me because he is a younger son."

 

I didn't ask why Alexei had been placed in the cabin with me, not wanting to send his mind down that path, but he brought it up.

 

"One of your men thinks this one would make a good catamite."

 

"He is no whore. My family will pay his ransom."

 

"That's not what Granger is saying. He claims this one was given to you as payment for a debt. That he has spent his nights with you. That's why I put the two of you here together."

 

"I kept him with me to protect him from Granger and his like. I'll have no one forced into something he doesn't want on my ship, if I can prevent it."

 

"All right, Captain Skinner, I'll have your second brought here so that the two of you can care for him. I will be off loading the cargo in a couple of days. I'll ask for ransom for the three of you."

 

"There is one other thing I need to know."

 

"What is that, Captain?"

 

"Did you just happen upon us?"

 

"Actually, Granger came to me with the information on your cargo."

 

"Son-of-a-bitch!" Alexei swore behind me.

 

******

 

I was furious for Walter. Betrayal by one of his crewmen, leading to the loss of a cargo and ransom being asked from his family. I wasn't even concerned with my rape at the time; I was concerned for him and for Mulder. I had known him such a short time, but his honorable behavior to me and to others led me to believe that Granger could have no real reason to betray him that way.

 

Walter turned to look at me as the pirate captain chuckled. "He seems to be very loyal for someone you claim doesn't warm your bed."

 

I bit down on my tongue; this was Walter's show and I had no right to interfere. I stepped back, making myself as small as possible. Walter studied me for a long minute and then turned back to the captain.

 

"I assume Granger will become a valuable member of your crew."

 

"Captain Skinner, what would you do with someone you knew to be disloyal to his former employer?"

 

"I definitely wouldn't give him the keys to the silver cabinet."

 

"Mr. Granger will get his just desserts, Sir, of that you may be assured. Now I must get back to my business. I'll have Mulder brought to you. "

 

He left us then and I looked at Walter, expecting him to scold me. Instead he touched my arm, "Thank you for your loyalty, Alexei."

 

"Do you trust this man, Walter?"

 

"No, he stood by and let you be raped. For that alone I'd see him strung up. Once Mulder is here we can try to make some plans."

 

"If Mulder is able."

 

"I guess we'll find out."

 

It wasn't long until the door was opened and Paddy entered, holding Mulder up. One look, and I knew they hadn't done anything for him. He was flushed with fever and there was an odor of unwashed flesh mixed with decay.

 

Walter gripped him on the free side and together he and Paddy got Mulder on the bunk. I turned to the guard. "Please ask your captain for water, bandaging, and we will need to cauterize his wound."

 

"I'll send word to the captain." He closed the door, leaving the four of us in the cabin.

 

I moved back to the bunk and pushed Walter aside, "Let me see it, Walter."

 

"Yes, Doctor Alexei."

 

I unwrapped his leg, wincing with him when the cloth stuck to the wound. That increased the stench in the room. It looked bad, the infection causing stripes to run up his leg.

 

"How bad is it, Alexei?"

 

"We're going to take care of it, Mulder. I need to get it cleaned up and we'll have to cauterize it."

 

"Does it need to come off?"

 

"I hope not, Mulder. These aren't good conditions for that."

 

"Alexei, how do you know about this?" Walter asked behind me.

 

"Spender had a doctor friend who liked…I asked him a lot of questions when he…I just seem to have a knack for knowing things about ailments and such."

 

He nodded but didn't ask me any other questions about what I'd learned. "How can we help?"

 

"See if there's anything in the chest we can use for rags. Paddy is there any water left in the bucket?"

 

"Aye, Alexei. Want me to wet down some of the rags?"

 

"That would be good. We can start trying to cool his fever."

 

By the time someone came with additional water and a pail of coals, we'd managed to clean him up some and he looked a little more comfortable.

 

"I need something I can heat to cauterize the wound."

 

Walter opened the nearest chest and came up with a silver hairbrush. "Best I can find, Alexei, unless you think you can get the guard to loan you his knife."

 

"At least it's flat. Mulder, this is going to hurt like hell. Walter, can you and Paddy hold him down?"

 

I put the brush into the coals. When it was hot, I nodded to them. They moved into position and firmly gripped Mulder. Using the dry rags, I grabbed the edge of the brush and put it to his leg. That added the smell of burning flesh to the other smells in the room. Mulder's scream echoed off the walls as he writhed against Walter and Paddy. I held it in place until I was relatively sure the infection was burned out, then I dropped it onto the wet cloth lying on the floor.

 

Mulder fell into an exhausted sleep as I bound his leg. The guard opened the door and ordered Paddy out. Walter dropped into a chair and I sat on the floor near him. When his hand tangled in my hair, it seemed natural to lean against his leg. I was sleeping that way when they brought us food.

 

Mulder was restless during the night, so Walter and I took turns bathing him to try and break the fever. Near dawn the fever broke and we curled up together to sleep on the floor. It was Mulder's hoarse voice that woke me.

 

"What does a man have to do to get fed around here?"

 

I looked up to see him hanging partially over the bunk. His eyes roamed down my body and I realized Walter was spooned behind me and his big hand was cupping my cock. I felt a blush move up my cheeks. Walter mumbled and nuzzled against the back of my neck. Mulder's grin got wider. I pulled Walter's hand up before my cock decided to respond.

 

"Walter, time to wake up."

 

His hand tightened on mine for a moment and then he sat up. He looked at Mulder grinning at us and then down at me. "Don't say a word, Mulder."

 

"Not even thank you?"

 

"Alexei is the one you should thank; he probably saved your leg."

 

"I know. I thank you, Alexei."

 

"You're welcome, Mulder."

 

The sound of Granger's voice echoed in the companionway. "Captain wants you."

 

"Go away, Granger. I don't believe you."

 

Walter and Mulder had both moved to get between the door and me. Mulder could barely stand but he was determined to try and defend me. But once more Granger was not granted entrance. We settled Mulder back on the bunk and then Walter knocked on the door to ask if we could get something to eat. As we waited they talked quietly.

 

"Captain, do you know what has happened to Dana?"

 

"I haven't heard anything. I didn’t want to ask; if she has managed to stay out of sight in some way I don't want them looking for her."

 

"Much as I hate it, you're probably right."

 

"The captain told me that they are going to be off-loading the cargo soon. Granger gave us to him."

 

"Damn! I'll string him up by his balls."

 

"After I'm finished with him. He's going to pay for what he did to Alexei."

 

Mulder looked at me but I refused to meet his eyes. He was bound to have heard the noises from the deck, the catcalls and Granger's taunts, the sounds of my abuse.

 

"The captain is going to ask for ransom for the three of us. I'll need to convince him to let me include a message so that the family will know why ransom is being asked for Alexei."

 

"We're not far from shore, Captain."

 

"You spotted something?" Walter's voice rose slightly.

 

"Yes, Sir. We're just north of Jamestown. I think they are probably going to store the cargo on one of the small islands."

 

I watched as the wheels turned in Walter's head. "There are only two places he can pull in close enough to unload. If he'll let me write a note to my brother…"

 

"What are you thinking, Walter." He didn't even notice that I hadn't called him Captain.

 

"My brother and I are close. As babes we had our own language that our family never figured out. I may be able to direct him to the correct location. Or close in any case."

 

"Would he have time to get there before they get the ship emptied, Captain?"

 

"If the winds are favorable. We need to try and figure out exactly which island if we can."

 

"Maybe Paddy can help, Walter."

 

"Paddy's a good man but navigation is not his strong suit."

 

"I can tell him what to look for, Captain."

 

"Walter, I'll do whatever you need as well."

 

Walter's hand gripped my shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. "I hope all you'll need to do is join the fight when the time comes."

 

The door opened then and Paddy entered with a meal for us. Walter tried to steer Paddy closer to the bunk so that Mulder could talk to him. The guard barked, "Leave the grub and come out of there."

 

I glanced quickly at Walter, then moved to the doorway, putting on what I hoped was a seductive look, I spoke to our guard.

 

"We need some extra water and bandaging for Mulder's leg."

 

I moved in close to him, blocking the others from view and hoped that they could get said what needed to be said in the time I could buy them. He looked at me and I smiled. His hand dropped onto my shoulder as he smiled back.

 

"Guess Granger is right about you. Ain't the captain man enough for you? Need a younger cock to make you happy?"

 

I heard the growl behind me and ignored it. "Captain is one fine man, but a fellow likes a little variety. 'Sides he doesn't own me."

 

The hand moved down to my waist. I was resigned to offering him a kiss if need be when Walter's voice called out behind me.

 

"I own you until you pay me back, boy. Now get your ass over here."

 

I shrugged and smiled at the man before turning back as Paddy pushed past me to the door. The door closed and I turned to look at Mulder and Walter. Mulder was grinning and Walter was frowning.

 

"Alexei, I appreciate your helping us, but I don't want it going any farther. I don't want you whoring yourself. We'll find another way."

 

"I wasn't planning to actually do anything."

 

"Captain, we needed the distraction. He worked with what he has, there's no shame in that."

 

"I didn't say there was, Mulder. I just don't like him taking the chance. He's been hurt enough."

 

"Walter, I wasn't in danger. You were here and he is supposed to be guarding us. I don't think he'd cross his captain that way. He's kept Granger out of here."

 

******

 

I looked at the determination in his eyes and knew he was offended that I might think he couldn't do his part to help us. As Mulder said, he dealt from his strength and at that time, playing the whore was what he could do for distraction.

 

I wanted to pull him close and keep him safe. He wasn't mine to do that for, and he was a man, not some fainting woman who needed protection. I reached out and put my hand on his shoulder for a moment. He smiled at me in return.

 

We ate and talked quietly. Mulder had managed to tell Paddy what to look for to help us mark our location. We'd also asked him to keep an eye out for Mulder's Dana. He still hoped that she had managed to hide in some way. For his sake I hoped that to be true.

 

The day passed slowly, and when Paddy came with the evening meal, Alexei again distracted the guard so that we could get information. I was intent on Paddy's words so when I looked up I saw that the guard had a hand on Alexei's ass and was sucking on his throat.

 

I was furious. I had no rights but I still saw red. Only Mulder's firm grip on my arm kept me from ripping them apart. Paddy pushed past me and loudly declared that he needed to get back to his duties.

 

Alexei pulled away from our guard with a sheepish grin and a shrug of his shoulders. He actually wiggled his hips as he moved back across the small space. When the door was closed I growled at him, "I don't want you doing that again."

 

His eyes looked wounded, "I'm trying to help, Walter. This is the only way I know how."

 

The pain in his voice jerked me up short. He turned his back and walked as far from me as he could in the confined space. Mulder glared at me and pushed me toward Alexei. I moved up to him and placed a hand on his shoulder.

 

"I'm sorry, Alexei. I know you're trying to help us. I just don't like seeing him touch you." I whispered against his ear.

 

"Why?" he whispered back as he twisted to look at me.

 

"I'm not sure."

 

"I wish you would touch me the way he did."

 

I was acutely aware that Mulder was in the room with us. Had we been alone, I might have kissed him. I settled for squeezing his shoulder. That was when I admitted that I wanted him. Seeing someone else touch him had brought that fact home to me.

 

"When we are free, if you still feel that way…"

 

He pressed back against me and I bit back a moan as his hips touched my crotch. My hand tightened on his shoulder and he grinned at me. "I will."

 

I stepped back quickly, before my body betrayed me further. As I turned I saw Mulder lying on the bunk turned away from us and I knew that he was offering us as much privacy as he could. So I took advantage and pulled Alexei into my arms.

 

I kissed him, a soft awkward kiss that I didn't linger over. Then I stepped back again. He smiled and his eyes sparkled at me. He didn't push and I didn't offer. Now all I needed to do was make sure that we got out of the situation with our skins intact.

 

I motioned to him and we sat down side by side on the floor. He leaned against me and I allowed it as I began to formulate the message I would send to my brother. The next morning parchment, pen and ink were given to me and I wrote out my message.

 

Paddy had spotted enough during the day to give Mulder an idea of where we were and where we might be headed. By the time I finished the letter I knew Joshua would read between the lines. Now we just needed to keep our heads.

 

From the porthole, I watched as the small boat rowed ashore and the letter I'd written was handed off to a rider who had been waiting. I had to admit that the captain was a well-organized man.

 

When Paddy brought the evening meal, he also brought news for Mulder. Dana had managed to hide out below decks. He'd found her while helping shift part of the cargo. He'd helped her slip past the pirates guarding them and she was now hidden in the compartment that only Mulder, Paddy and I knew existed.

 

"Did you get her food and water?"

 

"Sure did. She oughta be safe there 'till we get rescued."

 

"Good job, Paddy. I'll see that you get a bonus for all your help."

 

"Hell, Captain, you be like family to me. I still can't believe that damn Granger, you never did him no disservice."

 

"I have the feeling Granger is going to get what he deserves. Have you found out anything else?"

 

I looked over to see Alexei pressing against the guard and wanted to finish the conversation as quickly as possible. Now that we had come to an accord, I disliked seeing him play the whore even more. I understood the need for him to distract the guard, he was the only one who could, but I hated seeing another man touching him.

 

"I heard one of the men saying we'd be docking soon, early as noon tomorrow."

 

"Then you were right, Mulder, Joshua will be headed in the right direction."

 

I heard a groan and turned to see the guard pushing his hand down into Alex's pants. Before I could react, Paddy shot by me.

 

"Hey now, didn't your cap'n say he was not to be touched?"

 

"Didn't say anything about turning the boy down if he offered." But he pulled his hand out and backed up.

 

Paddy left and the door was closed. I looked at Alexei and he bit his lip as he looked back at me.

 

*******

 

I waited nervously for Walter's reaction. When he reached out and put his hand on my shoulder I relaxed, a little. We moved away from the door and I asked softly what they'd learned.

 

"Did Paddy have news?"

 

"Yes, I was right about where we're headed so the captain's brother will be looking in the right place. And Dana is safe."

 

"That great news, Mulder. Do you think your brother will get here in time, Walter?"

 

"Maybe, in any case he'll be closer to us and we'll have a better chance of getting all of the loyal crew off this ship and save the ransom." Walter's voice was grim.

 

We had nothing to do then except wait. When we settled down to sleep that night, he spooned around me and I felt safer than I ever had, contradictory as that may sound. When soft snores came from Mulder, his hand moved down and gripped me.

 

"Alexei, I want…"

 

We had nothing to facilitate actual entry, but we could do other things to enjoy each other. I turned in his arms and we kissed, our first true lover's kiss. I reached down to grip him and we worked each other as we shared more kisses.

 

There were quiet moans and soft sighs. When I came in his hand, he pulled back and whispered my name. Then he was jerking as he filled my hand. We used a corner of the blanket for clean up, then he pulled me in closer, pressing our bodies together. We slept then.

 

I woke to the sound of shouts and gunfire. We scrambled to get dressed and Mulder raised an eyebrow at our nakedness. I peered out the porthole, but there wasn't much to be seen. Walter broke a chair, giving us each a leg to use as a weapon.

 

When our door was thrown open, I wasn't really surprised to see Granger leading the way. Walter pushed me behind him. Mulder hobbled forward as well. In the small space there was no room to fight but then Granger raised a pistol and I screamed as he fired at Walter.

 

The jostling of someone behind him affected his aim and the bullet lodged in the hull. That allowed Walter to swing at him before another bullet from behind hit Walter. A well-thrown peg took down Mulder and then I was beaten unconscious.

 

I woke as Granger rutted on top of me. My arms were bound painfully behind my back and he pressed down on them as he pounded into me. The whimper that escaped me seemed to excite him and he rammed in, nearly breaking my kneecaps against the large stone he'd spread me over.

 

The pain brought me blessed oblivion. In my dreams Walter was calling out to me, searching for me. I tried to tell him where I was, but he couldn't hear me. I sank deeper into the blackness.

 

******

 

We were cast adrift in a small boat as the ship sailed away. Paddy bathed Mulder in cool water, trying to revive him, the pirate captain cursed as the ship he'd thought was now his sailed away. I pressed a palm to the wound in my shoulder as the blood flow slowed.

 

The pirate turned to me.

 

"Well, Captain, it seems that I should have taken care of Mr. Granger sooner."

 

"I won't argue with that. We'll just hope my brother gets here soon."

 

"The letter contained information that will lead him here?"

 

"Yes. We just have to hang on."

 

"Under the circumstances I'm glad you out flanked me, even if I go to prison for it."

 

"You just help me get to Granger and I'll forget that you took my ship."

 

"You have yourself a deal, Captain."

 

It was two days before Joshua showed up. Mulder had woken, so we knew he was going to be all right. We'd begun to worry that we wouldn't be found.

 

I, of course, had the separate worry of Alexei and what his fate was. My last sight of him had been his collapse as he was hit in the head. I tried to keep visions of him being raped again from my mind. I was less than successful.

 

After I was pulled aboard the ship Joshua hugged me. "Thank god you're safe. Who is that with Paddy?"

 

I glanced over at Mulder as the ship's doctor moved to check on him. Turning back to Joshua, "That's the captain of the pirate ship."

 

"What? How did he end up in a lifeboat with the three of you?"

 

"Granger managed to get his crew to turn against him. They've taken the ship and two people we need to get back."

 

"Do you know where they've gone?"

 

"We think they've pulled in at the cove where the captain was planning on selling the cargo. Granger thinks he left us to die. He has no clue that I'd sent you a message to help you find us."

 

"Mulder, are you up to helping with the navigation?"

 

"Aye, Sir. I'll make it."

 

Joshua turned to his second, "Give Mulder a hand. I need to talk to my brother. And lock up that pirate."

 

I followed Joshua to his cabin, as his men got busy. I knew he'd picked up on something. I entered the cabin and waited as he poured a drink for me.

 

"Tell me."

 

"Where should I start?"

 

"Start with who you need to rescue. Whoever she is, I hope she knows what she has in you."

 

"Joshua, Mulder's bride is in the hidden compartment of the ship. That is, if they haven't found her."

 

"That cloud that crossed your face when you spoke wasn't for Mulder's bride. Are you ashamed of her?"

 

I turned to the side and he stepped toward me. "What is it, little brother?"

 

I couldn't stop the smile. I'd been bigger than Joshua from the time I had a growth spurt at three, but he still called me little brother. Then the memory of Alexei's face as he lay crumpled on the floor came back to me.

 

"Joshua, you may not be pleased with my answer."

 

"Just give it."

 

"I took aboard a recently released indentured man, promised him a job, he saved Mulder's leg with his knowledge of remedies. They took him. Granger wanted him for his bed and the rape the pirate allowed didn't satisfy Granger. I fear he may have died from the beating they gave him as he fought to defend me. If not, he may be wishing he'd been killed by now."

 

"There is more to the story."

 

"Yes, but I'd rather not discuss it now. If he lives, we'll talk about it."

 

I could see the knowledge bloom in his face. We'd never kept anything from each other; we'd never worked out how to do that. As I waited to be judged, he reached to put his hand on my shoulder.

 

"Walter, we'll find them."

 

"I pray you are right."

 

It took us a day with the ship at full sail to come close to the cove. The lookout announced that he saw a mast in the cove. We dropped anchor and then gathered to make our plans. Mulder and I rowed ashore with a few of the hands to gather information. Captain Black had told us that his contact wasn't expected until the end of the week.

 

So we moved around toward where the ship was berthed in the cove. Granger and his cohorts were sloppy. There was no one set to watch. That made the planning easier. I sent one of the men back to take word to Joshua. The rest of us spread out to handle the ones on the ground.

 

Slowly we managed to pick off members of the crew as they wandered too far from the others. I took particular pleasure in opening the throat of one of the men who'd raped Alexei, and I felt no remorse over any of the men I executed that day.

 

We were in place to take out the others who were on shore when Joshua's ship came into view. Granger ran from the small hut I was crouched beside and I swung the belaying pin. He went down, and I left him as I turned to another man running toward me.

 

Within a couple of hours the fight was over. Granger was tied and left to one side as I finally entered the hut. Alexei was lying on his stomach, tied up, unconscious. There was dried blood on his thighs; his face was a mass of bruises. I could see Granger's fingerprints on his body.

 

Granger survived only because I was more concerned with Alexei. I untied him and used the meager blanket that was under him to wrap his body. I carried him from the hut to find Joshua issuing orders and seeing to any of ours who were hurt.

 

"Walter, is he..."

 

"Alive at least. I want to get him on the ship. When he wakes I want him in familiar surroundings."

 

"Go on, I'll take care of things here."

 

"Keep Granger alive. I want Alexei to see him hang."

 

"Aye, Walter, I want to watch him swing as well."

 

When I arrived at the ship, I found Paddy helping guard the captives. Mulder was coming up from the hold half carrying a slight framed figure, the cap fell away and a spill of red hair showed it to be his Dana. She was uninjured just weak from her time spent in hiding with almost no food and water.

 

I hurried to my cabin and placed Alexei on the bunk. Tossing the dirty blanket aside I inspected his body for other injuries. There was a tap on the door and Paddy entered with buckets of hot and cold water.

 

"Thought you'd wanna get him cleaned up, Cap'n."

 

"Thank you, Paddy."

 

"Is he hurt bad?"

 

"Pretty bad. I just hope he survives. Ask the doctor to come see to him when he's through with the wounded."

 

"Aye, Cap'n."

 

I took my time bathing him, getting him as clean as possible. The torn tissues of his anus made me wince. Why some men find so much pleasure in damaging others is beyond me. At least there was no fresh blood as I cleaned him.

 

******

 

I woke to find a strange face above me and couldn't stop the scream that erupted from my throat. The man was pushed aside and Walter bent over me.

 

"Alexei, you're safe. This is the doctor that my brother brought with him. Shh, I'm here."

 

I grabbed him, clinging to him as I shook with fear. I didn't remember a lot of what had happened to me but I had the pain in my body to tell me it was pretty bad. He rocked me back and forth, his voice low and soothing in my ear.

 

Once I calmed, he let me lie back and he watched as the doctor examined me. I gasped as sore places were probed and treated. Walter watched with serious eyes. When the doctor finished, Walter stepped into the passageway and they exchanged a few hushed words.

 

I let my eyes close, knowing I was safe; I drifted into a deep sleep. The next time I woke he was slumped against the side of the bunk, snoring. I tried to get up without disturbing him, but he jumped up.

 

"Alexei, what is it?"

 

"I need to piss."

 

"Here, let me help you."

 

He helped me up and after I finished he led me back to the bunk. "You should try to sleep some more. The doctor said you will be fine in a couple of weeks if you rest."

 

"Are we heading for home?"

 

"Yes, Joshua's ship is flanking us and we have the pirates who survived in custody."

 

"What about Granger?"

 

"He's in chains and will stay that way until he is hanged."

 

I wouldn't feel completely safe until that happened. I curled onto my side, pulling up the covers.

 

"Sleep next to me."

 

"Are you sure?"

 

"Yes, I'll feel safer if you are near."

 

I slept most of the way back to Jamestown, in spite of the nightmares that woke me often. I'd wake gasping or screaming and he would hold me until I slept again. I never pulled away from him, although I flinched away from the doctor every time he came to check on me. Finally, Walter told him that I didn't need him anymore. I admit that it was a relief.

 

The day we pulled into port was the day I met Joshua for the first time. He was waiting on the dock as we disembarked. Walter was holding on to me because walking was still difficult. My legs had been wrenched so violently during the rapes that it was going to take some time to heal.

 

Joshua stepped forward. "Welcome to Jamestown."

 

"Thank you."

 

"Walter, I sent one of the boys ahead to tell the servants to get the blue room in the carriage house ready for Alexei."

 

I looked at them, trying to figure out how much Joshua knew, but his face gave nothing away. There was a carriage nearby that Walter led me to and as I settled on the seat he leaned in.

 

"I'll be back in just a minute."

 

I watched as he crossed back to Joshua and they had a heated conversation. Joshua looked toward the carriage several times as he spoke and finally shook his head. Walter frowned and said something else, before turning back toward the carriage. Joshua reached out to grasp Walter's arm, but he was shaken off.

 

I was causing him problems already and we'd barely gotten to his hometown. He entered the carriage and called out to the driver. When we left the docks behind I turned to him. "Walter, I'm sorry."

 

"You have nothing to be sorry about."

 

"Are you telling me that you weren't arguing with your brother because of me?"

 

He reached to take my hand before he spoke. "He wants us to behave properly. Granger was on his ship on the way back."

 

"He told him about me."

 

"Yes. And he claims that I bought you because I wanted you to warm my bed. So Joshua is concerned about how much he is going to spout off at his trial. I should have killed the bastard when I had the chance. I wanted you to see him punished for his crimes."

 

"I understand, Walter. It will be better for me to stay in the carriage house. If we aren't under the same roof and you only treat me as a friend, his claims will be discounted."

 

"But you're still having the nightmares."

 

"I'll cope with them. I never wanted to cause you problems. You have been so kind to me. I couldn't stand it if I caused you to lose your family."

 

"I promised you that you would be treated fairly here."

 

"I'm not being sent to sleep with the livestock or in a damp basement, Walter. I will be fine."

 

He held on to my hand all the way to his home. The carriage house was actually better than any place I'd lived since coming to the Americas. He helped me get settled, leaving only when I insisted.

 

For the next two days I saw him only at meals. When I woke alone at night, I missed him dreadfully, but I didn't let him know that. I dined at the family table at mealtime. I kept my own council as I watched the family.

 

Meals seemed to be the times when they talked about the farm and the shipping company. The table was made up of several generations. Their parents had passed but Walter's oldest brother had a couple of grandchildren. They were loud but not rude. There was a lot of love that anyone could see. Walter was well respected and I began to fear that I would damage that.

 

I determined that as soon as I was physically able, I should leave. I would find my way in a world without him, without love, since my heart would stay with him. I felt a pang at leaving when I'd not paid my debt, but it was the best way to protect him.

 

Granger's trial was held swiftly. Walter insisted that I be there. We entered the room and his accusations began.

 

"There's the whore. I didn't do the things they are claiming. Skinner is trying to protect his whore. Skinner's jealous because he liked me better. It's not my fault that his bought and paid for bed warmer liked me better."

 

"Silence! I will have silence in the courtroom. If you are not silent I'll have you bound and gagged."

 

Granger seemed to get the point and he stopped talking. Of course his point had been made and now I would be suspect among the people gathered. Walter was called to the stand first and gave his testimony. He did not mention the rapes or anything about me.

 

But then the defense questioned him. He never wavered, never looked away and never really lied.

 

"Captain Skinner, isn't it true that you purchased the contract for the indentured servant Krycek?"

 

"No."

 

Granger pulled on the lawyer's sleeve and hissed in his ear.

 

"You were given the contract in trade?"

 

"Alexei Krycek had completed his contract before I met him, so how could I have accepted a contract as trade."

 

"If you took him on as crew, why did he sleep in your quarters instead of with the crew?"

 

"When he came on board he had been injured. I wished to see that he healed before placing him in a position that would aggravate the injuries."

 

"So you deny that you had a sexual relationship with Krycek."

 

"I do not believe in having sex with someone who has no choice."

 

"That isn't an answer."

 

"Alexei Krycek was at my mercy. He was injured; leaving an untenable position of slavery that should have ended over a year ago. Had I used him, it would have been rape. I do not acquire my bed partners that way."

 

The defense gave up at that point and then Mulder was called to the stand. I tightened my fists in my lap, waiting for him to tell them what he knew. Mulder's testimony was much the same as Walter's, but then the defense rose to ask his questions

 

"First Officer Mulder, is it true that you brought Alexei Krycek on board the ship with the understanding that his contract was payment of Spender's debt?"

 

"Yes."

 

"Did you believe that Captain Skinner was sleeping with Krycek?"

 

"Sleeping? Yes. Having relations with? No. Captain Skinner favors women."

 

"Do you still believe that after all that has happened? The Captain's behavior would tend to indicate a fierce loyalty to someone he claims was just a part of the crew."

 

"Captain Skinner is an honorable man. He would not leave a member of his crew. Had I been taken by Granger, he would have come for me as well."

 

"Have you ever shared the Captain's bed?"

 

"That has nothing to do with this trial, but the answer is no, I have not."

 

I breathed deeply when Mulder was released from the stand. The prosecutor then called Paddy and things went on. Again the defense tried to get Paddy to say that Walter and I were lovers but Paddy didn't give him what he wanted either.

 

The rest of the witnesses didn't have any knowledge about me other than the little they had learned since I was rescued. I'd begun to think that things were going to be smooth then the defense lawyer called me to the stand.

 

"Mr. Krycek," he managed to make my name sound like a curse. "I understand that your duties for Mr. Spender included warming the beds of his guests. When you were brought aboard the Captain's ship did you expect to continue performing for him?"

 

"I had no expectations."

 

"Really? Are we supposed to believe that you shared a bed with him for weeks and nothing ever happened?"

 

"Your beliefs are your own, I will not tell you what you must believe."

 

"Mr. Barrett, I believe this topic has been exhausted. Do you have any questions to ask the witness that covers new territory?" the judge asked at that point.

 

"Is it true that you had a run in with my client on board ship? And isn't it also true that you would do anything to smear his name for revenge?"

 

"We had a misunderstanding that the Captain ended. I have yet to say anything about your client."

 

At that point Granger got in on the act again. "Dirty whore claims I raped him. He wanted it and he let the Captain think I hurt him. Didn't want the Captain kicking him down with the rest of the crew."

 

"Mr. Barrett, I suggest that you get your client under control."

 

"Yes, your honor."

 

I waited as Barrett spoke in hushed tones to Granger and I almost smiled when the idiot whined at him, "But it ain't right."

 

"Mr. Barrett, are you finished with the witness?"

 

"Yes, your honor."

 

I was allowed to step down then, and I waited as Barrett tried to make Granger out to be innocent. I watched the faces of the jury as they filed out; I knew then that he would hang. They were back with a verdict in less than an hour. I have to admit it was quite gratifying to watch him fall apart as they took him from the courtroom.

 

I took no real pleasure from seeing him hang. He had broken the law, hurt me, and abused Walter's trust. But hanging would not undo those things. I was glad that he would never be able to hurt anyone else.

 

Walter stood stoically next to me as Granger dropped and I heard him whisper, "Hanging's too good for you, you bastard."

 

That Sunday, while the family was at church, I packed my few belongings and left. I couldn't leave him a message because I couldn't write and neither did I leave a message with any of the servants.

 

******

 

I stopped at the carriage house as we got back from church on Sunday, to find him gone. He had taken a few items of his clothing with him. The new boots were still there; my old pair that he'd worn until we got home was gone.

 

I tore around the farm asking the field hands if they'd seen him. I finally found someone who'd seen him leave, and at least got a direction. But even though I set out right away, I didn't locate him.

 

I went back home late in the day, tired, disheartened and angry. I had hoped to talk of a future with him. I couldn't figure out why he'd left. Joshua didn't help the situation any.

 

"Walter, he's a free man. You shouldn't expect a man who was treated the way he was to stay here after everyone found out what he is. It's better for him to go away where he can start fresh."

 

"What he is? Joshua, I never thought you were that narrow minded. He was a child when he was indentured. He did what he was forced to do."

 

"He's obviously convinced you that he was innocent. If he is so put upon why did he seduce you?"

 

"He didn't do that."

 

"Really? You can hide from others, but not from me."

 

"I'll have my things out of here by the end of the week."

 

"What are you talking about?"

 

"I intend to find him. I want to spend the rest of my life with him. Since he is not welcome here, then I should not stay here any longer."

 

"Walter, you can't mean that. It's one thing to be with a man when you have to be at sea for long periods of time, but there are half a dozen respectable women in town who would marry you tomorrow."

 

"I don't want a woman. I spent a lot of time spilling myself in women and never felt the pleasure he gives me with just a smile."

 

I turned and left him, ignoring his shouts. Our father's will had been very specific; there was nothing either of my brothers could do to cut off my income or to prevent me from spending my money to find Alexei.

 

It was actually Mulder who offered a suggestion on how to start my search. All of our ships carried one of the men from my ship with orders to search for him at each stop. I began searching farther inland.

 

It had been a year and I was sinking into despair. I had managed to have a house built on the section of land I'd inherited. Paddy was stationed there in case Alexei returned of his own accord.

 

When I came home from the latest foray into the surrounding area, I saw the warm glow of lights inside. I stabled my horse and entered the house. Paddy was sitting in the parlor talking to Mulder when I entered the room.

 

"Mulder, how are you? I didn't expect to find you here."

 

"I'm fine, Captain. We just got in today and I had something for you."

 

"Information?" my heart leapt with hope.

 

"No, not information. I put it in your bedroom since I didn't know when you'd get home."

 

"Thank you, Mulder. I don't wish to be rude but it's been a long day and I'm very tired."

 

"I understand completely, Sir."

 

Paddy stood up and smiled at me, "Go on to bed, Cap'n, I'll see Mulder out and lock up."

 

I nodded and accepted the lamp he offered me. Trudging slowly up the stairs, I entered my bedroom and stopped when the light revealed what Mulder had brought for me.

 

Lying, sound asleep in my bed, was a form I'd know anywhere. With shaking hands, I placed the lamp on the dresser, and walked quickly to sit next to him. Reaching out, I touched him carefully, afraid he'd evaporate like the morning mist.

 

He turned toward me, his eyes fluttered open and he looked at me. He was thin; obviously he hadn't been getting enough to eat. His eyes were wary, as though he was waiting to be punished.

 

"I didn't want to come. Mulder shanghaied me. He said you had been searching for me."

 

"Yes, I have. Why did you leave me?"

 

"I didn't want to ruin your life. Your brother was displeased. I'd embarrassed you in front of the town. I thought you would be happier if I weren't here to remind you of the mistake we made in the cabin that night."

 

"Mistake?"

 

"When we…" his face flushed and then I knew what he meant.

 

"I don't ever want to forget that night. The town can go to hell for all I care. My brother knows that I want you and that won't change. I thought you wanted me as well."

 

"I did, I do. I thought you were just being kind."

 

"I'm too selfish to be that kind."

 

"No, you aren't."

 

I bent to kiss him and he slipped his hands up around my neck. His lips parted for me and I deepened the kiss. When I pulled back we were breathless. I grinned at him and received his beautiful smile in return.

 

******

 

I smiled up at him as we calmed from the kiss. That's when I saw the circles under his eyes and realized he'd lost weight. Neither of us looked our best. I was tired from the lost sleep on the trip, in spite of Mulder's reassurances; I'd expected to be rejected. Instead I was welcomed.

 

I touched his face, feeling the beard, remembering that Paddy had told us he'd been out checking on another rumor for the last week. I didn't think either of us was in any condition to do much. I would if he wanted, I'd have stood on my head if he asked. But he didn't.

 

"Think there's room for me under those blankets?"

 

"Definitely."

 

I moved over on the bed and I watched as he undressed. Then the room was plunged into darkness as he extinguished the lamp. He soon joined me and pulled me into his arms. I was asleep almost before his body spooned around me.

 

I woke to something I'd never experienced before. I mean Walter was wrapped around me, but he'd done that most of the nights we'd shared a bed. There had also been a small amount of nuzzling, but this went beyond that.

 

His hand wrapped around my cock, his lips sucking a bruise on my neck, his hardness pressed against me, the biggest difference was the words, words that flowed between sucking and nipping at my throat.

 

"Never going to let you go, Alexei. You feel so good, smell good and taste good. I want you."

 

"You have me."

 

I pushed back against him in encouragement, feeling his hardness slide between my cheeks. He moaned, I smiled and moved my leg up to rest over his hip. He pushed forward and a bit of him entered me. I gasped at the slight burn.

 

No one had touched me since the last rape by Granger. My body was tight. I was suddenly nervous. He picked up on that and stayed still.

 

"Am I hurting you?"

 

"A little, we need something to make it easier."

 

"I don't have anything here. We don't need to do it that way right now. Turn over, we can do it the way we did the other time."

 

He pulled back from me to give me room to turn. My fear left me then. This was Walter; he would never hurt me. I turned toward him, smiling as he reached to pull me closer. One of his big hands gripped my ass cheek, his leg thrown up and over my hip. Our cocks rubbed and bumped together, his lips pressing against mine.

 

We moaned, rutted, kissed and the pressure began to build. I heard this low keening noise and realized it was I. The guttural pants in my ear were alternated with, "Yes, that's it, almost there." Then as he shuddered and spilled between us, calling my name. "Alexei!"

 

The pleasure in his voice was enough to push me over the edge. I jerked against him as I came, adding to the sticky mess on us both. Still he kept kissing me, stealing my breath, filling my mouth with his tongue, clutching me tightly to him.

 

Finally, the urgency slowed and he just held me as we both slipped back into sleep. We woke some time later to find that we were stuck together. He chuckled at my moan, as we pulled apart with a ripping sound.

 

We cleaned up and went down to have breakfast. Paddy was in the kitchen and gave me a big grin as I entered the room.

 

"Sure is good to have you back, Alexei. Now maybe the Cap'n can get some work done."

 

I looked over at Walter as he flushed. "He's been slacking off has he?"

 

"Moping around like he lost his last friend."

 

"If the two of you are through discussing me, could we have breakfast?"

 

Paddy grinned and nodded. We soon had tea and I watched as Paddy worked on getting us fed. We were lingering over our meal when Walter raised his head, "Company coming."

 

I heard the sound then, of a carriage and wondered who was coming to visit. Walter rose and headed toward the door and I followed. The carriage came to a stop and Joshua stepped down.

 

"Walter, I heard that Mulder…I see the information was accurate. Hello, Mr. Krycek. Walter, I'd like to talk to you alone."

 

"Joshua, we've gone through all that. I'll keep as low a profile as possible but I won't…"

 

"In private, Walter."

 

"Very well."

 

Walter turned and strode into the house and Joshua followed. I turned to look at Paddy.

 

"Have they been fighting about me?"

 

"You ought to ask the Cap'n."

 

"Tell me, Paddy. I don't want to drive a wedge between him and his family."

 

"Alexei, I ain't never seen the Cap'n look as happy as he did at the table just a little while ago. So don't you even think about trying to run off again. I'll track you myself if'n you do."

 

Before I could press him more, shouting came from the house. I couldn't make out the words. I headed that way. I entered the parlor to find them standing a few feet apart as Walter finished his sentence.

 

"…I accepted the woman you chose to be your wife, you can accept him or leave and don't come back."

 

"This isn't the same thing, Walter. The rumors are flying in town already and he's barely off the boat."

 

"Walter."

 

They both turned toward me. Walter's eyes widened, he crossed the space quickly; stopping in front of me, he reached out to me.

 

"Don't worry, Alexei, we will be together. Nothing will change the way I feel about you."

 

I was very aware of Joshua watching us. I was shocked when Walter followed though on the gesture and pulled me close to him. Joshua watched as Walter hugged me and pressed a kiss to my forehead. Holding me, he looked at his brother.

 

"Joshua, I won't ask for a seat at your table. I won't ask you to visit. The only thing I will do is demand that you never speak of this to me again. This is the man I love, the man I will spend my life with. You don't have to like it; you merely have to accept it."

 

"Have you no feeling for the family?"

 

"I love you all."

 

"Walter, you should let me leave."

 

"No, Alexei. This is your home now."

 

"I can see that I'm wasting my breath, so I'll take my leave."

 

Joshua swept past us and out of the house. I looked at Walter but he just kissed away my fears.

 

******

 

I tried to put his fears to rest with my kisses. He accepted my words, but I could see the worry still in his eyes. I wasn't sure how to ease him. I knew my own mind, always had. I wanted him, loved him, knew we were meant to be together.

 

If I had had any doubts, the year I'd spent looking for him had stamped them out. The day Mulder had brought him to me was the best of my life.

 

We spent our day showing him around the farm and house. That evening Paddy went into town after dinner, leaving us alone. We shared the clean up and then Alexei shooed me off to bed with a promise to join me soon.

 

I was naked on our bed when he entered the room. He placed a small vial on the bedside table. Lowering the lamp, he undressed and crawled into bed next to me. I pulled him close and we spent several long minutes kissing and touching. After a while he pulled from me and reached for the small vial he'd brought with him.

 

I sat up, took it from his hand. He gasped as I covered him with the oil. "Walter, what are you doing?"

 

"All these years you have been used. I don't choose for that to be the way of it in my bed. Here in this house you are an equal. I want this first time that we do this to be you inside me."

 

He smiled at me with wonder. Grabbing me he pulled me down to kiss me. "It might be a little easier for your first time if…well if you're on your stomach."

 

"I'd like to be able to see you."

 

"I know but it would probably not hurt as much."

 

"I'm not worried about you hurting me." I rolled onto my back and smiled my encouragement at him. He rose over me hesitantly. I pulled my legs up to give him access to me. He locked eyes with me as he entered me slowly.

 

I sucked in a deep breath as the slight burn started. He froze above me. I reached up to touch his face as I smiled at him. With my other hand I gripped his hip and pulled him down as I pushed up.

 

He slid inside me and we both gasped. "Walter?"

 

"I'm fine, Alexei." He bent to kiss me and I opened to receive him. Then he pulled back and pulled out part way before pushing back inside me. It took a couple of minutes before I could match his rhythm, but then we rocked the bed with it.

 

His thrusts became more powerful, going deeper and suddenly he hit a spot that brought a scream of pleasure from deep inside me. "Alexei!"

 

He grinned at me and pounded into me. I was making one continuous wailing sound and my cock jerked painting us both with my milky fluid.

 

His smile grew bigger as he crowed. "That's it, Walter. Yes, so good."

 

Then he pushed in deep, bruising my thighs as he clutched them tightly and I felt the warmth of him in me. For a long minute we were frozen in time, my climax still warming my body as he panted with his own. Then he let my legs fall to the side and slowly dropped to lie full length on my body.

 

I clutched him tightly to me as we panted together. When our breathing evened out, he lifted his head to look at me. "Was it…I mean…"

 

"Alexei, do not worry. Could you not tell how happy you made me?"

 

"I love you, Walter. I never dared to dream that I'd have a love like this. I just don't want to ruin it."

 

"You don't need to worry that isn't going to happen."

 

We kissed and then he rolled to the side. I used the edge of the sheet to wipe at the mess before pulling the covers over us and pulling him into my arms.

 

******

 

Over the next few weeks, we settled into a routine. I took over the garden and we soon had bounties of fresh vegetables. Walter commented on the way my body was filling out. I would have worried that he didn't like it if our bed didn't end up walking across the floor most nights.

 

He had started to go into town most days and I knew he was helping with the family businesses. I was content in my exile at the farm. I was well fed for the first time in my life, I had a productive way to spend the time he was away and Paddy was around most days for company.

 

It was a good life, a happy life. Then things changed again.

 

I was in the garden, sitting in the dirt as I pulled weeds. I heard the wagon and looked up. Getting to my feet, I walked to the edge of the garden and waited. The wagon pulled to a stop and a woman I'd never seen climbed down. She crossed the space between us and just stood looking at me.

 

"Hello, ma'am, may I help you?"

 

"Are you, Alexei?"

 

"Yes."

 

"Hello, I'm Sarah. I'm Walter's sister, in case you haven't heard about me."

 

"Walter has spoken of you many times. Would you like to come inside? I could make some tea."

 

"That would be nice."

 

I reached to retrieve my shirt from the fence post, slipping into it as I led her toward the house. I wasn't sure what was going on but I was determined she would have nothing bad to say to Walter about me.

 

I checked the kettle to find it still warm. I got the china pot and measured in the tea then poured the warm water into the pot. She took a seat at the table as I moved around getting out the cups. I placed one in front of her and reached into the cupboard to get out the biscuits Walter had brought home the day before.

 

As I sat, she reached for the pot and poured for us both. No words were spoken as we fussed with sugar and such. I opened the biscuits and offered one to her. She took it.

 

"So, Alexei, do you love my brother?"

 

I looked across at her, wondering why she was asking me this. It never occurred that she would believe me but I answered truthfully anyway.

 

"More than life. He is the finest man I have ever known."

 

Her eyes pierced me. I found myself glad that I had no reason to doubt my feelings in the matter. After what seemed an eternity she nodded.

 

"He said the same about you. Joshua worries about the family standing. Walter sees only his love for you. Women are more practical. Love is a rare thing in this world. When you find it, you need to hold on tight."

 

"I intend to hold on."

 

"No more running off, making him worry?"

 

"Never again."

 

"Now that that is settled, get cleaned up."

 

"What?"

 

"It's Joshua's birthday. I've made his favorite dessert and the whole family is having dinner together."

 

"I'm not welcome at his table."

 

"It isn't really his decision. The house is actually mine. He knows better than to cross me. Now get ready. Wear your best."

 

I didn't expect it to go well but something told me to do as she said. Having his sister approve of me wouldn't be a bad thing. I bathed as quickly as possible. Getting out my best breeches and the green shirt that Walter had given me a week before, I dressed then pulled out the embroidered waistcoat and my good coat.

 

When I stepped back into the kitchen, she smiled at me.

 

"My but you clean up nice. Can you handle the team?"

 

"Yes, I can."

 

"Then you may drive."

 

At the wagon, I gave her a helping hand and she thanked me. She chatted with me on the trip over about how she'd recently been widowed and had come home to live out the rest of her life. I knew her husband had died, but not that she was moving back home.

 

When we pulled up in front of the house, a servant came out to take care of the wagon. She gave a short order to him. "Send someone to tell my brothers that dinner will be served soon. Make sure that Walter knows I expect him as well."

 

"Yes, ma'am."

 

She hooked her arm through mine and led me into the house. The look on Joshua's wife's face was priceless. She obviously hadn't expected to see me.

 

Sarah smiled at her. "Vera, I've convinced Alexei to leave his garden and come have dinner with us. I sent one of the boys to get Joshua and Walter. Alexei, would you like some lemonade while we wait for the Skinner men?"

 

"Thank you, Sarah, that would be nice."

 

"Why don't you have a seat in the parlor while we take care of that?"

 

I nodded and turned to enter the parlor. I heard a hiss from Vera and the steel tones of Sarah in reply. I settled on the settee and waited. When the ladies entered a short time later, Vera was flushed but Sarah winked at me. I suddenly had the feeling that Sarah's word was law in this family. I gave her a grateful smile in reply.

 

The three of us were sitting, Vera sullen, Sarah talkative and I was enjoying the conversation when Walter and Joshua entered the house.

 

Joshua called out. "Vera, Sarah?"

 

"We're in the parlor, Joshua."

 

He came into the room and headed straight to his wife. Walter followed and his eyes widened when he saw me sitting next to Sarah on the settee. Vera whispered something to Joshua and he turned, seeing me for the first time.

 

Walter raise an eyebrow at me, I smiled at him. "Now that you are here we can have our dinner." Sarah rose and pulled the bell cord. When a servant entered the room, she spoke. "We're ready for dinner, let Nanny know please. Alexei, will you escort me to the table?"

 

"Of course, Sarah."

 

I stood and offered my arm. Walter stepped aside and followed us to the dinning room. I could hear Joshua and Vera talking, but didn't bother to try to hear the actual words. In the dinning room, I seated Sarah and watched as Walter bent to whisper in her ear. She laughed. He kissed her cheek.

 

"Alexei, sit here next to me. Walter you sit on my other hand."

 

"Sarah, may I talk to you, please?"

 

"We can talk over dinner, Joshua. I'm hungry and I'm sure Alexei is as well. He had been working quite a while on the garden if the size of the pile of weeds he'd pulled was any indication. Alexei, you really must tell me the secret of your green thumb. The flower gardens here need help."

 

"Alexei uses fish heads for fertilizer, Sarah. I thought he was insane when he asked me for them, but you saw the results."

 

"I wonder if that would help the roses?"

 

"I've seen it work quite well on roses."

 

"Do you grind them up? Put them on the top of the dirt or maybe bury them?"

 

"I do grind them, stinks to high heaven, but the results are worth it."

 

The children started to enter the room and Sarah rose to help get them settled. Joshua and Vera took seats and sent multiple glares our way. I concentrated on my conversation with Sarah and Walter.

 

Sarah presided over dinner as a queen at court. After the first few minutes, Joshua joined in on the conversation. Vera kept stubbornly silent through the entire meal. After dessert was finished, the children were excused and that seemed to be the signal Vera was waiting for.

 

"Sarah, I don't think it's right that you have forced us to have that man at the table in our own home."

 

"Vera, hush."

 

"No, Joshua, I won't hush."

 

"Sarah, I think Alexei and I should go."

 

"No, Walter, I want you both to stay. Vera, there is something here that you seem to have lost track of. In father's will, this house was left to me. When I married, I moved to live where my husband wanted. But the house is still mine. You live here at my discretion. That means that who sits at this table is my decision to make."

 

"This is cruel of you, Sarah."

 

"I don't think wanting my brother and his, what do you consider him to be, Walter?"

 

"My partner, my lover."

 

"Oh God!"

 

"Vera, you have an option here. Make your peace with this or find another place to live."

 

"Sarah, I can't believe you mean that."

 

"Joshua, you used to be a man. The man you used to be would never turn his back on his brother. She is your wife and that is a consecrated union. True, Walter and Alexei can never have that type of union but that doesn't make the love they share less real than yours."

 

"I'm not telling him how to live his life."

 

"No, you are just letting your wife's prejudices deprive him of his family. Now you can keep him from your children, but you will not shut him out of the home he was born in, nor tell me who sits at my table."

 

Vera fled from the room, her sobs echoing back. Joshua looked at his sister and knew she wouldn't back down. He followed after his wife.

 

"Sarah, I…"

 

"Walter, he needs to remember that he wears the pants in the house."

 

"Like Andre did?"

 

She laughed and patted his hand. "Father always did say I should have been a man."

 

I reached out to her and she took my hand. "Alexei, do not worry so. Some times people just need a kick in the rear."

 

"I don't want to cause problems."

 

"Families are all about problems and how you work them out. Now you two get home. I'll come over in the morning and you can show me how you make the fertilizer."

 

Walter stood and held her chair. She walked with us to the door. Walter kissed her cheek and then she tilted her head to me and tapped her cheek. I kissed her and whispered, "Thank you."

 

She waved as we rode toward home. That was the turning point. Vera never did really like me but she learned to tolerate me, be civil. Sarah's children grew up calling me Uncle Alexei.

 

And Walter – well Walter and I made that big bed rock right up until the last day of our lives.

 

 

Epilogue:

 

"That was one of our better lifetimes, Alex." I told him as the tape ended.

 

"You know, you were awful sexy standing on board that ship with the sails flapping and your shirt blowing in the wind."

 

"You just liked those damn tight breeches."

 

"Well they did show off the merchandise quite well. There's a costume shop at the mall. We could deck you out like that for Halloween."

 

"Will you peel them off me and give me a good reaming?"

 

"You can count on that, slave."

 

"Would Master like to give me a preview?"

 

"You've got ten minutes, that ass better be high and ready."

 

"Yes, Master."

 

He pulled me close gave me a wet kiss and then slapped my ass. I took my cue and headed for our bedroom. I was in position when he came into the room. He rammed into me, I moaned in ecstasy as he took me hard.

 

All the countless years and it was still fantastic every time. We still made the bed rock.


	7. VII: The Summer King

  
Author's notes: Alex is a beautiful man who has been selected the king of summer. For one year, he may have anything he desires do anything he wants. Then he will die as a sacrifice.  
  
NOTES: Ursula sent me the summary above. I think she and I were related in a prior life because otherwise she wouldn't be able to manipulate me so well. This is the 7th in the regression series.  
  
I warn you that this one is written as a fantasy so I blended elements from different cultures and made no effort to set this in a real timeframe. I hope that won't be a huge problem for you. Beta by Bill and Josan.  


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"Him. I want that one."

 

My entourage turned as one to stare at the man I'd pointed out. Their leader looked back at me in surprise.

 

"You want a man? A foreigner? The bald one?"

 

"Yes. I want him. Bring him to me."

 

Seated in the litter I watched as the dumbfounded guard went to fetch the man I had pointed to. I could see the strange look that was thrown my way as the man shook his head. Finally, two of the men grabbed him and pulled him through the parting crowd to my side.

 

I smiled down at him as they held him. He was older than I had thought at first, but still a striking man.

 

"My name is Alexei. Come join me."

 

I moved over to make room for him, not caring that the men carrying the litter would need to support the weight of two. This was my time after all and I was to have anything I wanted. Right now I wanted to shock anyone watching.

 

"Look, I told these men I'm not that kind. Find someone else to warm your bed."

 

"I do not think you understand. I am the King of Summer."

 

"That means nothing to me. I'm from another land where such things are not done."

 

"Nevertheless, you will warm my bed if I wish it." Turning to look at the leader of the guards, I spoke again. "Him! No other will do."

 

"Yes, Lord."

 

At a gesture of his hand the big man was surrounded and we continued our trip through the bazaar. He struggled until he realized it was useless. Then he resorted to verbal attacks as I stopped several times to pick out items and foodstuffs. I ignored his ranting, as did the men forcing him to come with us. When I felt I had all the things I wanted for the day, I ordered the men to take us home.

 

The large house I had been given was indeed the most beautiful place I'd ever seen, even though I would only have it for one year. When we reached it, I headed right for the room that was set aside for bathing.

 

"Bring him, I wish him cleaned before I use him."

 

The tone was haughty, even though I did not feel that way. In the past short month of this, the last year of my life, I'd learned to hide my true feelings. I do not deny that I enjoyed the plentiful food provided me, or did I shrink from the way my body was cleaned and oiled. The clothing was uncomfortable, stiff with needlework and embroidered decorations, but I wore it as a sign of my station.

 

I had, however, turned away all the women who had sought to share my bed. I know they hoped for me to produce offspring before my year ended. I could have lain with them but I had determined that I would leave no child behind.

 

I was sure that Sir Charles, my uncle, had arranged in some way for me, his brother's bastard, to be chosen. He had kept my mother and me at the point of starvation for many years in his anger at his brother's love for her. I do not believe my father would have let us be treated so badly, had he lived to see my birth.

 

She had died the previous winter in the cold shack we called home. I was alone with no hope of being more than a serf. When my uncle suggested that I be among the youth in the drawing for King of the Summer, I agreed. I felt if I was chosen I could at least benefit my kin and I'd have a year to enjoy life to the fullest before my life was taken from me.

 

I stood with arms raised as the servants stripped me. I laughed out loud as he cursed the ones stripping him. The small pool was partially filled and the line of servants brought in buckets of hot water to fill it to the top. He was pushed to the edge and when he refused to step in they 'assisted' him.

 

I stepped in once the water had stopped splashing. He frowned at me, but the water was too soothing and he relaxed minutely.

 

"Will you tell me your name? Surely, that does no harm?"

 

"Walter."

 

"Walter, a strong name. It suits you."

 

"Thank you, so much."

 

His sarcasm was not lost on me. But I smiled as though we were making the politest of conversation.

 

"Is there anything special you would like for dinner? I can have anything you want brought."

 

"No need to pretend we are courting. You know I don't want to be here. I told you, I do not lie with men."

 

"This night you shall, and any other nights I desire it. I might decide I want you for the rest of my year."

 

"And how long is that?"

 

"You truly do not know about our customs, do you?"

 

"No, I do not."

 

"I have eleven months left in this world. Then I shall be sacrificed to the gods."

 

"Sacrificed?"

 

"Yes, to bring good fortune to the village."

 

"That's insane!"

 

"It is our way."

 

"Why are you just accepting this? Don't you want to live?"

 

His eyes sparked with his emotion and I was mesmerized for a moment. If I had thought him striking from across the market, he was even more so with the color of anger in his cheeks. I let myself pretend that the anger was directed at my plight, not at me.

 

***********

 

I looked at the boy sitting across from me. How could he be so calm when his death had been decreed and there was no good reason for him to die? This country was so backward, it boggled my mind. My family had warned me not to come here. But I just had to travel and now I was a virtual prisoner.

 

The room was well guarded, the men making no move to conceal that they watched and listened. And this beautiful boy sat there as if he had all the time left in the world and not a care past what to eat for his dinner. I was outraged, both for him and myself.

 

He shrugged one shoulder and stood abruptly. I watched as a servant hurried forward to bathe him, then he sat back down to allow the soap to be rinsed from his body. The servant then walked to my side of the pool. Since I knew the guards would force me as they had forced me to come here, I stood. By the time the servant considered me clean, my jaw ached from gritting my teeth.

 

Alexei exited the pool and walked to my side as I was being rinsed. His hand reached out, cupping my balls, hefting them as if I were breeding stock he was inspecting. I groaned as my cock twitched. He looked up into my eyes with a faint smile. I wanted to slap the smile off his face, but knew I'd be punished if I hurt him.

 

His fingers ran lightly along my shaft, causing my cock to rise slightly. His other hand rose, a thumb rubbing over the lip I suddenly realized I was biting. I snapped at him and he allowed me to bite his thumb. His eyes widened with the pain, but he made no move to pull away or call for help. The metallic taste of his blood brought me to my senses and I released him.

 

Both our eyes centered on the abused digit and he slowly lifted it to lick it clean. He stepped back from me and spoke to one of the servants.

 

"We will have our meal on the terrace. Bring Walter something to wear and show him the way."

 

He walked away from me to a long bench where he reclined. A servant immediately began to massage scented oil into his skin, as another servant began to comb his hair. I took the robe I was offered and covered my body. I turned to look at him just as he turned onto his back and the servant began to rub more oil over his chest.

 

I felt the heat of my blush as the servant moved down to oil even his most intimate parts. His foreskin was pulled back and the crown oiled just as carefully as the rest of his body had been.

 

The servant who had been told to show me the way to the terrace touched my arm lightly. I jerked, turning to look down at him.

 

"This way, Sir."

 

I looked back at Alexei once more, but turned hastily away when his head turned toward me. Three of the guards followed as the servant led me to the terrace. Once there, I saw that the area was heavily patrolled, there was no chance for me to escape.

 

I settled in a chair to await whatever the night would bring. Soon platters and bowls were brought to sit upon a long table to one side. A smaller table was covered with a gleaming white cloth, and the finest dishes and goblets were placed upon it. Two comfortable looking chairs appeared, and were placed on either side.

 

A servant poured a goblet to the brim with wine and brought it to me. The aroma was heavenly, so I allowed myself to sip as I waited. The wait was not a long one.

 

Alexei came through the door and my breath caught in my throat. I had never noticed male beauty in the past, but no other word fit this man. His hair had been left loose around his shoulders and gleamed in the remaining rays of the sun. The robe he wore was of the finest silk, dyed the green of his eyes. The areas of his skin that were visible were the white of alabaster.

 

I felt rough, crude and ugly next to him.

 

My face flamed when I saw the white bandage around his thumb. He had done nothing to me as yet and I had injured him. He stood looking out at the sunset as though it was his last and that is when it struck me that it took a truly brave man to show such serenity when he knew the exact number of his days.

 

Candles were being lit behind him, but no one moved to the table as yet, and no one crossed in front of him. He stood motionless until the last of the light faded from the sky. Then he turned to me.

 

"Come, eat, Walter. I'm sure you will enjoy the food. The best cooks in the land prepare the meals of the Summer King."

 

**********

 

Walter rose and came to the table as the lit candles were moved to surround us with their gentle light. The night breeze was just enough to make them flicker, but not strong enough to extinguish them. He took food from various dishes as they were offered to him. Once his plate was filled he ate with good appetite.

 

I picked at the food, my mind on the end of the evening, not my dinner. I waited until he had eaten most of his meal before I spoke to him.

 

"Walter, tell me of your home."

 

"It's far from here and I should never have left it." He growled in response.

 

"Your anger is wasted. It will not change my mind."

 

"Why me? Just answer that. Surely you could have found a willing bedmate. You are certainly handsome enough to attract someone."

 

"There are many who have offered. But they just want to have the privilege of saying they were with the King. There would be no real feelings in the act."

 

"And you think there will be with me."

 

"Anger is a feeling. And you won't tell tall tales of me when I'm gone."

 

"So you would risk that I might hurt you?"

 

"Did you think I would be the one to be used? No, Walter, I wish to enter you."

 

He roared and jumped from the chair, knocking it over. He charged for the edge of the terrace but was brought down by the guards. I watched as he struggled against them. It had been foolish of me to hope he'd go quietly to my bed.

 

When his struggles ceased, I rose to walk to him, the guards holding him securely. The look in his eyes would have turned me to ash had he been a god. I shook my head sadly. Part of me wanted to back down and let him leave, but I could not. I knew that my every move was being reported to my uncle, and I would not give him the satisfaction of showing any weakness.

 

"Take him to my room and bind him to the bed."

 

"On his back or his stomach, Lord?"

 

"His stomach, of course. How would I make use of him if he was on his back?"

 

They hurriedly pulled him to his feet. Again he struggled, and then one of the men hit him.

 

"Stop that! I want him to be aware when I take my pleasure from him." I made my voice as commanding as possible, and received several wary looks from the men. They all knew that to anger me would mean the end of this sheltered job.

 

The blow had stunned him enough that they were able to get him into the house. I sat at the small table, sipping my wine until the moon rose high in the sky and the temperature had dropped. Then I made my way inside.

 

He was lying face down on my bed, his legs spread obscenely and tied securely to the posts. His hands had been wrapped in cloth before the rope was tied around them. I resolved to discover who had made that effort to protect him from further injury.

 

I walked slowly to the side of the bed where his head was turned. His eyes were closed, his breathing deep, he was sleeping. I stood and just looked at him for a long time.

 

In this position every muscle was revealed. This was not some soft man who had his needs catered to. This was a man who knew about work, who spent time in the sun. I wondered if he would be a fierce or a gentle lover.

 

It saddened me that I would never know.

 

I sat next to him on the edge of the bed. Reaching out, I caressed his shoulder feeling the strength that my eyes had revealed. It would be easy for him to hurt me. My thumb throbbed to remind me that he already had.

 

His eyes flickered and then opened. Puzzlement quickly gave way to knowledge.

 

"Do you want me to beg now?"

 

"No. I want you to try and relax. I have no desire to hurt you."

 

"You just want to rape me." His eyes flashed furiously at me.

 

"I would rather make love to you."

 

Had he known me, he would have heard the sadness in my voice. He turned his head away from me.

 

"Get on with it then. I want to get out of here."

 

His tone brought out my anger and I lashed out at him.

 

"Did you think this was for one night? I have eleven months to live and I want companionship. You will do nicely."

 

His head twisted back around to me, his expression displaying anger mixed with disbelief.

 

"You would keep me here against my will for that long? Raping me nightly so that you'll have companionship? The first chance I get, I'll kill you."

 

"Do you think I'll only be able to use you at night? No one will care if I want you spread across the breakfast table. And as for killing me – I wouldn't advise that, they would then make you take my place. Be patient; eleven months is not that long, you'll have many years to forget me."

 

He screamed then and pulled violently against the bindings. I stood and moved away until he had worn himself out and lay limp upon the sweat-soaked bed. I'd known he would not escape, the ropes were strong and the men who had tied him expert.

 

I ordered water from the servants and bathed the sweat from his body. Then I dropped my robe, picked up the scented oil and knelt between his legs. He jerked away as much as he could at first, but I took my time. Slowly the deep massage soothed his muscles and he lay pliant.

 

He jerked again when I dribbled oil over his buttocks. I'm sure it tickled as it ran along that valley between them. I kneaded his ass slowly until those muscles relaxed as well, then slipped my slick fingers in between, to work a finger inside him. He groaned when I brushed over his sweet spot. With my other hand I fondled his balls, the weight of them resting in my palm, as I used my fingers to caress.

 

The servants had placed a rolled up blanket under his hips before they tied him, so I had plenty of room to reach his cock as well. Pulling back a little, I applied more oil to my hands, sliding one along his balls until I could grip his cock. I brought him erect.

 

With one hand on his balls the other on his cock I worked him until I felt the tightening of his sac. Pulling harder, I sighed as his seed spurted against the blanket he was resting on. Catching as much as I could, I coated my own erection and plunged into his body before the last tremor had subsided.

 

I lay full length on his back and waited for his internal muscles to stop clenching. Then lifting up onto my hands, I took my pleasure.

 

**********

 

I panted against the bed, wanting to scream my rage at him. He had used my body against me. My traitor of a cock had responded to him. My cock didn't know it was a man touching it. Didn't care - all it cared about was the fact that it had been months since another had handled it.

 

He had pushed inside me before my climax had stopped rolling though me. My body had been so focused on it that I felt no pain. The weight of him on my back as I rode out the last of the twitching was strangely comforting. I hated him for that as well.

 

When he started to fuck me, I was even angered at the pleasure he was bringing me. I tightened down trying to push him from my body, but if his moans were any indication, it only seemed to add to his pleasure.

 

He moved slowly at first but soon picked up the pace. The bed rocked under us as he slammed into me. I could feel his heavy balls slapping against mine with each stroke. Words tumbled from his mouth – words I didn't want to hear.

 

"tight…hot…slick…so good inside you…never stop…never let you go…mine first…always…"

 

His head dipped and he licked the side of my throat before sucking hard on a portion of my skin. I didn't know it then, but the rest of my life I would carry his marks on me.

 

He straightened again and his thrusts were harder and deeper. I moaned in shame when I realized that my cock was hard again. As if he knew, his hand sought me out and he stroked me as he pounded away at me.

 

When he slammed in harder than before and howled, his hand squeezed me almost to the point of pain and I released again. His jerking inside me added to the wave of my own orgasm. He dropped over me like a blanket; his panting breath tickling my ear as we both fought for precious air. His hand stayed wrapped around my organ possessively.

 

I moaned as his softening penis slipped from me, wiggled as his sperm tickled my balls as it ran down over them. After a few minutes he rose and soon I felt a cool cloth on my still heated skin, the trickle wiped up so that it no longer tickled.

 

"I'll have you released if you give your word to sleep quietly next to me this night."

 

"You would feel safe sleeping next to me after I threatened you?"

 

"At least I would die after the best sexual experience I ever had."

 

His voice held a note of sarcasm that I thought was directed at me. Much later I would learn the real reason for the tone.

 

"I give my word."

 

He summoned the guards and I was released, my wrists and ankles treated with a soothing unguent and wrapped in soft bandages. They stripped the bed and placed clean sheets upon it. He settled in the bed and motioned to me. I lay next to him as near the edge as possible. He sighed, and then closed his eyes.

 

Had I thought to break my word to him, I soon realized that it would be impossible. A guard stood at each corner of the bed. After what seemed a long time his breath deepened and I knew he slept. I finally found rest as well.

 

I woke the next morning with an armful of sleep-warmed, naked man flesh and a mouthful of raven hair.

 

I wanted to scream when I realized I was hard and his hand was caressing me as his tongue lapped at one of my nipples. I did scream, for a completely different reason, as he moved down and enveloped me in his mouth. No woman had ever used her mouth on me that way. I was both appalled and intrigued.

 

Without thought I gathered his hair in my hands, moving the mass of it to the side. Then I lifted my head to watch as he pleasured me with his lips and tongue. His mouth was so wet and hot against my flesh. The sight of him moving up and down on me was obscenely erotic. I watched as he worked me with his hands joining in the task, fingers caressing the space behind my balls before probing gently at my hole.

 

I flinched as his finger touched my sore hole and he withdrew it immediately. I was surprised at his almost intuitive response to me as well as his obvious concern. The fingers moved back to my balls rubbing them tenderly as his mouth continued it's magic.

 

I tightened my hands in his hair, knowing I was most likely hurting, but he made no protest. I looked up quickly to see where the guards were. They were still in the room but were all looking elsewhere, although, I had no doubt they had been watching.

 

Looking back down my body to him I forgot about them as he pulled up. He gripped me with one hand and ran his tongue around my cockhead. I gasped as his tongue tip rubbed over and then dipped into the slit. His eyes were open and he smiled at me before he dived down once more.

 

I clutched him to me and let out a loud groan as I emptied in his mouth. When I was spent, I released his hair. He moved up the bed to lie watching me as my breath evened out. I felt I owed him something, but I certainly didn't want to try that with him.

 

I turned on my side and reached out to him. He gasped softly as I tweaked his nipple. His eyes fluttered as I traced a line down his chest and wrapped my big hand around him. His hand hovered near me until I took it with my other one and placed it on my shoulder.

 

As I stroked him he leaned into my touch, his hand tightening on my shoulder. One leg bent upward and I reached to pull it to rest on my hip. A low moan greeted that action. I took him back in hand and stroked him in a steady rhythm.

 

A whimper slipped from him before he bit his lip, my eyes focused on his face as he chewed at his lip to keep back his sounds. I moved my head closer to his to whisper.

 

"Come for me, Alexei."

 

His eyes opened, I saw the surprise there before he jerked and sprayed me with his fluids. Had I not been so close I would have missed the murmured, "Thank you."

 

*********

 

I couldn't believe he was willingly touching me, had moved my hand and leg to rest on his body. And then he was stroking me, his hand strong and sure. I was so very close to the edge and suddenly he spoke.

 

"Come for me, Alexei."

 

And I did.

 

It felt so right, as if we had done this many times before. I wanted to kiss him but settled for saying thank you. We lay there for several long moments until his stomach suddenly made a loud noise. I couldn't suppress the chuckle.

 

"Guess we should eat."

 

I slipped from the bed and called for water. I allowed him the space to tend to his morning needs while I went into the adjoining room to take care of my own. I was at the table when he joined me, trailed by several guards. I sighed with dismay when I saw the new bruise purpling his jawbone. One of the guard's eyes was swollen as well.

 

But I reminded myself that I couldn't expect one kind act on his part to signal that he wanted to be with me. After all, he had told me more than once that he was not of my persuasion. I did allow myself to hope that he would accept the idea soon; for his own safety if for no other reason.

 

"Help yourself to breakfast, Walter. I don't normally have anyone serve except at dinner."

 

He walked to the buffet and filled a plate. At least his appetite was remaining good. We ate in silence and had just finished when my uncle swept into the room.

 

"Alexei, how are you this morning?"

 

"I'm fine, Sir Charles."

 

"And who might this be?"

 

I frowned at his obvious gambit, shrinking away as his hand settled on my shoulder. He already knew who Walter was. He probably knew before we'd even gotten home from the market the previous day.

 

My uncle moved away from me, helped himself to food, then sat at the table next to Walter. I watched as Walter shifted away from him. Not that I blamed him, my uncle always smelled of stale tobacco and unwashed flesh.

 

"His name is Walter. He'll be staying with me until I grow tired of him."

 

Walter's eyes flashed with rebellion but that shifted to something else when my uncle spoke.

 

"You gave me the impression you did not enjoy such games, nephew."

 

"This is different."

 

"I see. He doesn't look the type."

 

"I am present! Do not talk about me as if I can not hear you."

 

My uncle gestured and one of his guards came forward to strike Walter, knocking him to the floor. I moved quickly to cover Walter's body before another blow could land; not the best move on my part, but the only one I could make. A heavy boot hit my side and my breath left me in a gush.

 

Walter's hands grabbed for me to move me out of harm's way, but there was no need as my uncle had called out.

 

"Do not hit the King! Help them both up."

 

Strong hands reached for us and we were both soon on our feet. My uncle turned to a servant.

 

"Prepare the King's bath, I wish to make sure there is no damage."

 

I groaned, Walter's hand reached out to steady me. I looked into his eyes, seeing the knowledge there. He was definitely a smart man who had read the situation quite well.

 

Walter made no other protest as we were ushered into the bathing chamber. He even entered the water with me, to sit quietly as I was fussed over. After I was bathed, I was put on display as the bruise on my side was treated, then my skin was oiled.

 

I could feel my uncle's eyes crawling over my body like snakes. It took all my will power to stand still and be anointed. While I did not mind the private oiling of my body, this exhibition of my body in front of my uncle sickened me, as did everything about the lecherous old man.

 

"You will be a most splendid sacrifice, Alexei. The gods will be pleased with your beauty."

 

"Thank you, Sir Charles."

 

I caught movement out of the corner of my eye and turned to look at Walter. He had started to rise from the pool.

 

"Walter is ready to be bathed."

 

His head turned to me; I issued a warning with my eyes. He gave the slightest of nods and stood still as his body was washed.

 

My uncle stood and walked over to me. I stood stoically as he touched the bruise on my side. Then he turned to the guard who had kicked me.

 

"You are lucky it is a small injury."

 

I wanted to laugh out loud at that point. He would not have cared if my ribs had been broken as long as I was well in time to be offered to the gods.

 

"I must leave you now, Alexei. I have to take care of my own affairs." He walked over to stop next to Walter. "I would have thought you would have used one of the many throwing themselves at you. Why this bald, foreigner?"

 

"Because he will leave here when I'm done with him. Besides, a reluctant bedmate lends spice to the encounter. Isn't that what you told me?"

 

I could not keep the bitterness from my voice. Walter's eyes were focused on me instead of the man standing by him. I saw the rage enter them at my uncle's next words.

 

"You did indeed. Goodbye, Alexei."

 

He swept from the room with his bodyguards. I sagged slightly and Walter was instantly at my side.

 

"Get the King his clothing!"

 

The servants jumped as if Walter were in charge. When they brought my clothes, he took them from their hands and dressed me himself.

 

**********

 

I had learned much in the short time since waking that morning. I had learned that a man could give me greater pleasure than any woman ever had. Also that Alexei was related to the royal caste but clearly not loved, and his uncle had abused him.

 

I was amazed that he was not a gibbering idiot or cruel, most would have been with these things and a death sentence hanging over them.

 

When his clothing was brought, I took it from the servant and dressed him myself. Stepping back, I realized I'd liked the view of him naked, gleaming, wearing the bruise he had obtained trying to protect me. That did not, however, keep me from appreciating the way he looked clothed.

 

I stepped farther back to allow the servant to tend to his hair. Clothing was brought for me at his order and I dressed as I waited for him to be finished.

 

"Alexei?"

 

He looked up at me as if surprised to find me still there.

 

"Yes, Walter?"

 

"Would you show me some of your countryside? I only arrived here two days ago and have not seen any of the wonders I was told existed in this land."

 

He smiled, his face transformed, no longer merely beautiful, he looked angelic.

 

"I would be honored to show you my country." Turning to a servant he spoke, "Have a carriage readied for us and pack some food for our noon meal."

 

He led the way outside and we waited on a bench under a large tree for the carriage to be brought around.

 

"What would you like to see, Walter? The hot springs? The vineyards? Or a ride up the mountainside?"

 

"I will bow to your expertise. Which do you enjoy most?"

 

"The view from the mountains is quite something this time of year. You'll be able to see all the gardens in bloom. There's a nice spot there to picnic as well."

 

"That sounds perfect."

 

He beamed at me, then started to talk animatedly about the waterfall next to the place we'd have our lunch. He looked so young as he spoke. Again I thought how barbaric this custom was of sacrificing a human to gods who probably didn't exist, and if they did, wouldn't notice.

 

The day was warm and sunny – a wonderful day to go for a long drive through the countryside. He pointed out many things to me as we drove along, and I found myself laughing with him over the antics of the children who ran next to us tossing flowers into the carriage and calling his name.

 

Around mid morning we reached the highest point the carriage could reach. Jumping out of the carriage, he spoke to the leader of his guards.

 

"Give us two of the horses. Walter and I will go up to the plateau by the waterfall to eat lunch. You may all rest here until we return."

 

"Lord, I do not believe that is a good idea. He may try and escape or hurt you."

 

"There are only two ways down from there – the trail yonder or jumping off to one's death. You will stop him if he comes back down the trail and should he choose the other way – well, that would be his decision. Walter, do you wish to hurt me?"

 

"I only want my freedom, Alexei. I have no desire to hurt you."

 

"See, Captain. Nothing to worry about."

 

The man nodded slightly, admitting his defeat. Two horses were brought to us and once we were seated on them a blanket and basket were handed up to us as well.

 

Alexei smiled at me as he turned his horse toward the trail that wound up the mountain. Neither of us spoke until we were out of sight of the guards.

 

"You are a very trusting man, Alexei."

 

"Not really. I just feel that you wish to live more than you want me to die."

 

"That is true. It must be difficult to be watched every minute of your day."

 

"It isn't as bad now as it was the first week. You learn how to tune them out and forget they are there."

 

My thoughts went back to the morning and I realized he was right. I had forgotten them as he pleasured me.

 

"You don't seem to be able to tune out your uncle."

 

"No."

 

"He's treated you badly, hasn't he?"

 

"I don't wish to talk about him. It's too lovely a day."

 

The pain in his voice made me sad for him. So I put it away and asked of other things.

 

"How long will it take us to reach the plateau?"

 

"Less than an hour. I'm sure you will find it worth the trip."

 

The air was fresh and a subtle scent hung in the air. I decided to ask him about it.

 

"Alexei, what is that odor?"

 

"It's the gilly flowers, Walter."

 

He reined in his horse, passed the basket to me and jumped to the ground. Taking a few steps off the main edge of the path, he plucked at a plant growing in a break of the rock wall. Walking back to where I sat he held the blossom up to me. I leaned over to pull the scent into my lungs, the white petals brushed softly against my nose.

 

"They use those in the oil that they rub on your skin."

 

"Yes, do you like the scent?"

 

"It's very nice."

 

He smiled at me before mounting his horse and leading me higher up the mountain. As he'd promised we reached the plateau not long after that. I stopped and just stared, we could see across the entire valley. The panorama was breathtaking. He'd been right about being able to see the colors of the gardens.

 

"Walter are you going to just sit there all day or come have lunch with me?"

 

I realized we'd been there long enough for him to dismount and spread out the blanket. His horse was tethered near the pool at the base of the waterfall I had yet to look at. I dismounted and led my horse over to take its place next to his.

 

The waterfall was not the strongest I'd ever seen but this time of year most of the snow that contributed to it had probably melted. The pool looked deep enough to swim in if you liked cold water. I knelt down and scooped up a handful of water. The cold water felt good after the dust of the trip.

 

Walking back to him I found that he'd spread the blanket so that we had a boulder to rest against, with the best view of the valley. I sat next to him.

 

"This is wonderful, Alexei. Thank you."

 

"You're welcome. Most of the townsfolk would not have thought to tell you of this. It puts no money in their pockets. Do you want to eat right away or wait for the wine to chill?"

 

"Wine? How long will it take to chill?"

 

"Maybe an hour."

 

"I can wait."

 

"Good."

 

He leaned back against the boulder. I pointed out a couple of particularly colorful areas and asked about them. He answered my questions as to what type of plants grew there and offered to take me to see them close up.

 

After a short period of companionable silence he began to pull out our food. We had a loaf of the crusty bread that I had discovered to be very soft inside, three different types of cheese, a small roasted chicken, and several types of fruit.

 

"Shall I go get the wine, Alexei?"

 

"Yes, thank you."

 

He smiled at me as I hastened to my feet. At the pool I took a minute to splash water onto my face. What was happening to me? I was enjoying having a picnic, on a mountain, with my abductor.

 

"Walter? Do you see it?"

 

"Yes, Alexei. I'll be right there."

 

*********

 

Walter came back around the boulder with the wine bottle in his hand. I noticed the water still dripping down his face but did not ask why. I wanted nothing to spoil the mood of the day.

 

I held out the plate with his half of the chicken resting on it. He took it from me and we ate quietly. After a while we were down to nothing but fruit and agreed we'd eat that later.

 

"Would you like to nap, Walter? Or I can show you the path to the top of the waterfall."

 

"How steep is the path? I'm not that graceful."

 

"You can manage, I'm sure."

 

"I think I'd like that."

 

I wasn't surprised when he reached to take my hand on a particularly tight spot in the trail. I was; however, surprised that he didn't let go. Not even after we reached the top.

 

His gasp, when I turned him so he could see the difference the extra hundred feet made in the view, erased all the bad memories of my uncle's visit.

 

His hand squeezed mine as he turned his head from side to side to take in the sights.

 

"Alexei, this is even more fantastic than from below. We must come back and bring canvas and paints. Not that I could do this justice…" He trailed off and stood so very still.

 

A bird soaring overhead brought him out of his trance and he chuckled softly. Turning, his eyes locked on mine and I fell into them. At least, that's what I thought was happening, right up until his lips touched mine.

 

Pulling back abruptly, he let go of my hand, and I was left swaying as he disappeared down the path. I slumped to the ground and sat there until I heard the Captain of the guards yelling for me. I walked to the edge to see them holding Walter, a red stain showing on his face.

 

"I'm here. I'm fine."

 

I turned to hurry down the path to see how much damage they had inflicted on him.

 

Reaching the plateau, I hurried to where they were still holding Walter.

 

"What did you do to him?"

 

"Lord, you were up here so long we became worried. When we got here and did not see you…"

 

"You thought he threw me over the edge, then what? What was he doing when you got here?"

 

"I was getting dressed! I had just bathed in the pool."

 

Now the water was barely above freezing. I almost grinned when I thought of the reason he must have been in the water. But he was glowering at me, a definite set-back and certainly not the way I'd wanted our afternoon to end. I turned to the guards and used my harshest voice.

 

"Leave us! I will see to his injury and we will be down within two hours."

 

The Captain signaled his men and they went back to their horses and started down the trail. When they were out of earshot I spoke to him.

 

"I am sorry, Walter. In the future I will make my orders more detailed to them so nothing else like this happens. Come over to the pool, so that I may clean your wound."

 

He followed me to the pool, sitting on a stone to make it easier for me to reach him. I ripped a piece of cloth from a less fancy part of my clothing and dipped it in the water. He winced as I dabbed at his split lip.

 

"At this rate I will be dead long before they get you on the altar." He grumbled at me as I bent to rinse out the cloth.

 

"I am very sorry, Walter."

 

"For heaven's sake stop apologizing. If you are really sorry, let me go."

 

"I can not do that."

 

He glared at me before jumping up and heading for his horse. I watched as he started down the trail, then hurried after him. I did not want him hurt again by reaching the bodyguards before I did. When we reached the carriage, I sent a man back for the blanket and basket.

 

We were most of the way back to the house before he spoke again.

 

"Do you think that I will come to love you?"

 

"No, but I think you might be the only sincere person there when I am sacrificed. You will certainly be the only one to wish me dead for just cause."

 

"How will it be done?"

 

"I will be placed upon the altar, then bound to it. The priest will cut out my heart, which will then be placed in the fire. Once all life is gone from me, I will be burned upon a pyre."

 

"God! How can you be so calm? You are a young man still, your life before you."

 

"What sort of life do you think I would have as a bastard son whose parents are both gone, with an uncle who only wants to see how close he can keep me to starvation? A month ago I was little more than skin and bones."

 

"But you could leave here. Go make your way in another country."

 

"Maybe, but this way I help what is left of my family, my mother's sister and my cousin. He's promised they will be safe now."

 

"And you believe him?"

 

"I must."

 

I turned away from him then so he would not see the doubt and fear in my eyes. I was surprised when his hand came to rest on my shoulder. Even more surprised when he pulled me back to rest against his chest, his strong arms wrapping around me securely.

 

"I would like to meet your aunt and cousin."

 

"We will visit them when you grow weary of the sights."

 

"Eleven months is not so very long. But I wish to send a message to my family, I had expected to be back home before then."

 

"Thank you, Walter."

 

"Do not thank me yet. I am still angry with this. I am not the kind of man you are and I resent the way you used me last night."

 

"I made you feel good this morning, did I not?"

 

"It would be a lie for me to say otherwise. That does not, however, change the fact that I was used without my permission last night. And before you say anything, do not say you are sorry."

 

That brought a small smile to my lips.

 

"I will not lie to you either, Walter. I am not sorry for the pleasure I received in you. What man would not be pleased to know he is the first?"

 

"What man indeed." He said grudgingly.

 

The carriage pulled up to the house then and he pulled away from me as the door was opened. I was beginning to believe that he still needed to keep his manly front for all concerned. That gave me an idea.

 

We spent the early evening strolling through the grounds before having dinner again on the terrace. When it came time to retire I sent the guards out of the room.

 

"Leave us, I have no fear that Walter will injure me. He had plenty of time to do so if he wished today. I will call if I need you."

 

He turned to look at me. His voice was gruff as he spoke.

 

"It is my turn to thank you. I do not like being watched so closely."

 

"In the carriage today, you offered me the time I want from you. I offer you the chance to keep as much privacy about what happens between us as I can."

 

I turned away to walk into the bathing chamber. I was seated in the warm water with my head back, eyes closed, when I felt the water move. Looking up, I watched as he settled in the water across from me. I smiled at him before I dropped my head back onto the pillow.

 

When the servant came to bathe me he spoke.

 

"Can we not do this ourselves?"

 

"Of course, if that is your wish. Leave us, we shall tend to our own bathing tonight."

 

The servants all left quickly, probably glad to have time to themselves. When I reached for the sponge he took it from my hand. I sat still as he bathed me, not at all surprised that his touch caused me to harden. I was surprised when he pushed my foreskin back to clean me thoroughly. When he reached for the pitcher to rinse my body I took the sponge from him.

 

He stood, statue-like as I washed him. I looked up at him for permission before I took his cock in hand to wash it. He nodded his consent. I was as careful with him as he had been with me. He was standing quite proud by the time I had finished. I rinsed him and then stepped away to reach for toweling. Again he took it from my hand and dried the water the air had not taken care of from my body.

 

Then he held the toweling out to me with a smile. I dried him carefully, then started toward the bedchamber.

 

"Wait. You have not been oiled."

 

"I did not expect…"

 

"I like the way it makes you smell."

 

I nodded, afraid to speak. I moved to lie on the bench. His hands were sure and strong. He relaxed me in ways none of the servants ever had. By the time he instructed me to turn over I was almost asleep. He chuckled as he helped me turn.

 

His hands took on a more teasing manner on my chest. He pinched my nipples, then leered when I moaned. When he reached my cock and found out just how sensitive the head was, he did not stop stroking until he'd wrung a climax from me.

 

My eyes were closed most of the way, but through the slit I saw him lift his hand, first smell my seed that had run down over his fist, then touch his tongue to it delicately. I bit the inside of my cheek to hold back a moan, then closed my eyes, completely unwilling to watch his reaction to my flavor.

 

When my breathing returned to normal, he steadied me as we made our way into the bedchamber. I took my place on the bed and waited, expecting him to stay as far from me as he had the night before. I couldn't stop the contented sigh as he pulled me to lie on his shoulder and his arm cradled me close.

 

"May I wake you in the morning as I did this morning?"

 

"Yes. Now sleep, I plan to make you take me out for the entire day tomorrow."

 

I sank into the soundest sleep I'd experienced since moving into the King's house a month before.

 

**********

 

Alexei woke me the second morning in the same way as the first. Only this time we had no audience and I managed to hold back longer.

 

He seemed pleased that not only did I hold onto his hair, but also I helped direct his movements on me. The second time was even better than the first. When his finger brushed against my hole I arched up to him.

 

His eyes watched me as he caressed over it several times before pulling up off me to wet the finger thoroughly. When he slipped it inside me I hissed – but not with pain. I looked into the eyes watching me as he twisted his finger to rub the spot again.

 

"Alexei, please."

 

His head dipped and my cock disappeared into his mouth. I kept one hand in his hair as I used the other to caress his face. I could feel my cock's movement along his cheek. When a second finger joined the first I bucked up so hard I lifted us from the bed. His free hand moved up my chest to pinch my nipple.

 

I suddenly realized I was chanting his name.

 

"Alexei, Alexei, Alexei, Alexei, Alexeiiiiiiiii."

 

I felt the climax roaring through my body, heard his moan as I gripped him so hard that later he would wear a bruise on his jaw and I'd find a clump of his hair in my hand. The world went away for a few minutes and when I opened my eyes he was watching me, a little grin adorning his face.

 

With no thought, I pulled him to me and licked my taste from his mouth. Moving down, I tasted his throat, his shoulders, each nipple sucked and bitten lightly. Then I wrapped my hand around him and stroked him until he came, whispering my name.

 

Over the course of the next week, I asked him many questions when we were alone. And each day he showed me some new trick he knew that left me sated and sometimes senseless. It wasn't until the end of my first week with him that I got up the nerve to take him in my mouth. I was clumsy but he was so pleased that it made me determined to learn to do it well for him.

 

He had made no attempt to enter me again, and at first that pleased me. But on that last day of the first week I wished to give him as much pleasure as possible. Looking back, I realize that I loved him even then, but at the time I justified it as reciprocity.

 

So, after I came back to earth from his morning wake up, I told him I wanted to be taken.

 

"Alexei, I want you inside me this morning."

 

"What?"

 

"You do enjoy that best, do you not?"

 

"Yes, but I'm taking so much from you now."

 

"Accepting, Alexei. Not taking."

 

"You really mean this?"

 

"You will learn that I do not say things unless I mean them. I may change my mind about things later but when it is said it is meant."

 

He threw his arms around me and covered my face with excited kisses. Then he guided me to my knees on the bed, pressing my shoulders down.

 

"This angle will be easier for you in the beginning."

 

I smiled against the pillow at his choice of words. He took a long time playing with me, making me slick and rubbing all the pleasure spots inside he had discovered. When his cock finally pressed inside me, I was ready.

 

I loved his small sigh as he sank into me. I even welcomed the weight of his heavy balls resting on mine. Once he was inside completely, he bent low and kissed a trail along my spine. The resulting shiver made him chuckle. So he kissed his way back to my neck before whispering in my ear.

 

"No one has ever made me feel as you do, Walter. The gods have seen fit to gift me a wonderful last year of life."

 

I felt the scald of tears and turned my face into the bed so he would not see them. I rocked with him as he moved sure and strong inside me. Just as I felt the hot flow of his seed inside, I heard the cursed voice of his uncle.

 

"Nephew, seems you learned your lessons well. And he looks quite delectable on his knees for you."

 

I felt his entire body tense up, his hands gripped me so tightly, I carried bruises for over a week. I, on the other hand, had the desire to kill. His grip was a warning and I waited to see what he would do.

 

Alexei straightened and pulled out of me abruptly. I moaned with the discomfort of the rough move. I heard his uncle chuckle, no doubt pleased with my reaction. Then Alexei slapped me hard on the ass and spoke.

 

"You may go back to sleep, Walter. I will wake you when I'm through talking with Sir Charles."

 

I slid flat on the bed as he rose from it. Out of the corner of my eye I saw him pull a robe around his body.

 

"Alexei, is he a good ride?"

 

"He is adequate."

 

"Only adequate? Then why do you keep him?"

 

"I told you my reasons. I do not require shooting stars, only release."

 

Their voices faded as they left the room. I left the bed and went to a spot where I could watch and listen but not be seen.

 

"I understand you have been playing tour guide for him."

 

"It is more for me than for him. Our country has many wonders that I never took the time to see before."

 

"It does indeed. I also hear that you are putting the guards out of your room at night and sending your groomers away."

 

"I have no need to be watched as I sleep and the guards have no need to know how often I use him. As for the other – he can take care of my body – gives him something to occupy his mind for a bit. He has strong hands."

 

"So, you are not becoming smitten with this man?"

 

"Of course not. Do you think I want anything other than his body? He hates me and would kill me if he thought he could get away with it."

 

"The Elders will be coming to check on you later today, so any plans you had made will have to wait. I told the cooks to prepare extra food for them. Make sure he knows the proper way to behave or the guards will punish him."

 

"It might be best to have a few of the guards take him somewhere for the day."

 

"No, the Elders wish to see the man you are wasting your seed in. Have him dressed presentably."

 

"Yes, Sir Charles. Is there anything else?"

 

"No. You may go back and use him again. That's probably an excellent idea, he should be docile if he is exhausted."

 

I watched as the hated man left. Alexei ordered the guards to leave, then sagged in the chair, his ramrod posture gone. Mindless of my state of undress and the fluid beginning to run down my legs, I went to him. Placing my hand on his shoulder, I offered silent support.

 

After a long minute he stood and led me back to his bed. I held him, waiting. Finally, he spoke.

 

"I hate him. I hope you understand that what I say and do in front of him is to protect you from him. If he thought for even a minute that you were such a pleasure, he would come after you. I will let you leave before my last day. I want you safely away while I still reign as King."

 

"You truly believe that?"

 

"How can I not? My mother believed him responsible for my father's death. She said that he wanted her. That he and my father fought about her. One of my earliest memories is of him raping her."

 

"And he raped you, didn't he?"

 

"No. My body was his price for giving my mother medicine. Not that it saved her, but it did ease her suffering."

 

His anguish cut through me. Coming from a tight knit, loving family I was appalled that his uncle had treated him this way. I had known only love from my uncles.

 

That is when my mind began to formulate the plan to save him. Putting my mouth close to his ear I spoke softly.

 

"Alexei, he surely has someone spying on us. You should do as he instructed, so they can report that back to him. We must make him believe the roles you have set for us."

 

"We?"

 

"Yes, Alexei. You are no longer alone."

 

I placed my lips against his, saying with my kiss what I was not ready to say with words. When I pulled back, his eyes searched mine.

 

"Take me, Alexei. Make it rough so they will believe I am just a hole for you to use. Do not worry that you will hurt me, I am strong."

 

Over the next hour we put on a convincing show for anyone who was spying. He rode me hard and I bellowed as if in pain, but in the end my seed was as responsible for the mess on the bedclothes as his.

 

*********

 

I had allowed the servants to see to my bath and oil my body. I much preferred Walter's attention, but I feared being aroused when they arrived if I allowed him to tend me.

 

When the guard announced that the Elders had arrived, we entered the formal parlor to greet them and Walter took up position behind me as I had instructed. Once everyone was seated, he sat on the small stool that was placed at the side of my chair. I waited for the Elders to address me.

 

"This is the man you have chosen to be your consort? He is not attractive, nor is he of our country. Why have you chosen him?"

 

While it is true that Walter does not meet most standards for attractiveness, he glows with all that is right within him and I found that most appealing.

 

"He is strong. I do not have to hold back my desires to prevent hurting him. Being from another land is better as well. He will be allowed to go home and never need to tell his family of this."

 

"We would prefer that you bed the young women of the village. We would all be blessed if the King of Summer left behind offspring."

 

"I can not do that. It is not my nature. As King it is my right to select my consort."

 

"Yes, of course. In the past other Kings had male consorts but still bedded the women sent to them."

 

"As I said, I can not."

 

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see the color rising in Walter's cheeks, but he sat still as I had told him he must. Glancing at him quickly, I saw that his hands were balled into fists. I hoped the meeting would end quickly. I wanted so badly to reach out and take his hand, but could not. To do so would be to endanger him. That is when I knew that the hardest thing I would ever do in my life would be to watch him leave.

 

"Lord, it is time for your inspection."

 

I stood without a word and walked to the center of the room. Dropping the robe I was wearing, I waited for the old men to look and touch their fill. I hated being inspected as if I had no feelings. But even more, I hated the way the bolder ones of the group touched me as if I was theirs to do with as they pleased.

 

At one point, I was turned, saw Walter sitting with his eyes tightly closed, his bottom lip gripped between his teeth and a thin line of blood running from each fist. Somehow that made it both easier and harder, knowing it infuriated him.

 

When they finished, we ate dinner in the formal dining room; Walter again seated on a low stool. He ate the food I offered, again playing his role. Under the table he put a hand on my knee, the warmth a reminder that I was no longer alone.

 

I sent Walter to the bedchamber as soon as our dinner had been completed, with a command to be ready for my attentions. That earned a few lewd remarks as to his worth. I had never been so glad to see someone leave, as I was to say goodnight to the last Elder.

 

Making my way toward my room, I ordered the guards to stay outside. Anyone entering without being summoned would be dismissed. Stepping into the room, I found Walter waiting for me, his naked body gleaming in the moonlight.

 

He didn't speak, merely undressed me and led me to the bed. Once we were settled, his arms wrapped securely around me, the reaction hit. I shook as if plagued with the ague.

 

"I am here. Try to put it from your mind."

 

I pulled one of his hands up to kiss the crescent-shaped marks in his palm.

 

"It upset you as well."

 

"I wanted to kill the one who fondled you. Why should they have the right to treat you that way? You are giving your life for their ignorant sacrifice, at the least they could give you the privacy of your own body."

 

I smiled against the shoulder my head rested on. I had expected him to accept his position here, eventually, but had not expected him to care for me in any way. Turning my head so that I could see him, I slipped a hand up to cup his face. He turned and his lips pressed to mine. It was sweet from the dessert I had fed to him earlier, but soon turned needy.

 

He pulled me on top of him, amazing me once more with his strength. His legs parted so that our cocks nested together. Big hands pulled the pins from my hair to let it flow around us, the moonlight giving us just enough light to see each other well.

 

I rocked against him, enjoying the friction of our bodies as they slid and then caught. With his mouth opened for me to enter, I plundered him, again tasting the sweet nut pie from dinner. When I pulled back to breathe, he whispered.

 

"You are so beautiful. I can not bear the thought of your not being on this earth."

 

I had no words to answer that, so I bent to kiss him again. His hands moved down to grip my ass tightly, as he humped up against me, grinding us together. I whimpered into his mouth as my seed flowed between us. A few minutes later his heat joined mine.

 

Later, when I tried to move he clutched me. "No, stay. I want to feel your weight on me as I sleep."

 

"I am too heavy. We will be glued together."

 

"I don't care. Please, Alexei."

 

In answer, I snuggled my face into his throat, my sleep coming deep and dreamless.

 

The next morning I peeled myself from him when my need to relieve myself became desperate. He followed me into the pool after taking care of his own needs. As we soaked, I brought up my plans for the day.

 

"After we have breakfast, I thought we would go and obtain some paints and canvas."

 

"And go up the mountain?"

 

"Yes. You said you wanted to paint the landscape from there and if we do not do it soon the flowers will be gone. Would that please you?"

 

"And what will you do while I paint?"

 

"Admire a different type of scenery."

 

"Should I paint in the nude so that your view will be unobstructed?" He leered at me.

 

I was surprised to the point of snorting a laugh. "I think that would be best. That way you won't ruin your clothing with paint."

 

He nodded with a wicked smile. Without any additional discussion we hurried though our bathing. I gave instructions to the servants as we ate our breakfast, and we soon made our way to the main part of the village for the supplies he needed.

 

I was puzzled when he pulled me toward the apothecary shop that was across from the merchant's where I had intended to get his supplies.

 

"I need a few things, Alexei. I have money to pay for what I want."

 

"You are with the King, you do not need money."

 

I stood and spoke with the owner of the shop as he wandered among the aisles. Picking up several dried plants, he moved back toward me.

 

"These are exactly what I need."

 

"Lord, one of those herbs is very toxic."

 

"Walter?"

 

"I mix it with my paint. It enhances the color. Do not worry, sir, I know full well the danger of ingesting this. It will be ground up into my paints and no one will eat the paint."

 

"No need for you to worry. Walter does not prepare my food. And I do not believe he wishes to kill himself. Wrap them for him, please."

 

We soon made our way to the shop I had been headed for and I watched again as he picked out the items he would need. It was quite a bundle when he finished and I nodded at the storekeeper when he insisted on paying for them. The herbs had been a pittance, but these supplies were far more expensive and I knew he wanted them to belong to him.

 

The day was beautiful with large puffy clouds floating overhead. There had been a light rain overnight, so the roads were not as dusty as normal and that made for a most pleasant trip up the mountain. I had ordered a pack mule to be brought along, and once the guard had it loaded with all the paraphernalia that had traveled with us in the carriage I turned to the Captain.

 

"Walter is going to be painting, so we will be on the mountain for the rest of the day. Do not expect us until sunset."

 

"Lord, please allow some guards to go at least to the edge of the plateau with you."

 

"No. I am in no danger. Walter knows what will befall him if he harms me."

 

"It is my duty to protect you, Lord."

 

"It is also your duty to obey me. We will be fine."

 

When we reached the plateau, Walter immediately took the bottles of wine and placed them in the stream. I spread out our blanket by the boulder as he began unpacking his art supplies.

 

"If I set up here will the view be as clear as you wish?" His eyes twinkled with his mirth.

 

"That should be just perfect, thank you."

 

I lounged back against the boulder, snacking on a piece of fruit as he put up the easel. He had picked a spot by a relatively flat ledge that curved out from the big boulder I rested against. Using that as a table, he laid out all the other supplies he had purchased.

 

When everything was arranged to his satisfaction, he turned to grin at me. I watched as he walked over to stand just a few feet away. His clothing began to fall to land next to me on the blanket. My cock showed its appreciation of this by rising underneath my clothing.

 

When he was naked, he gave me one last wicked grin and walked back to his easel. I groaned and he turned back to flash me a smug look. I covered my face and sighed.

 

It was going to be a long day.

 

*********

 

I was very aware of his eyes on me at first, but soon I lost myself in the effort to do justice to the view. My attention was so riveted that I jumped when his hand touched my shoulder.

 

"Walter, you should come eat and get out of the sun for a while. Your skin is burning."

 

That is when I realized that I was indeed quite warm. My skin is not as fair as his is, but I had been traveling for several months and my flesh had not been exposed to the sun as it would normally have been at home.

 

"I'll go splash some water on it and get the wine."

 

He nodded and walked back to the blanket. I hurried to the pool to retrieve the wine. I had really started to notice the burn by then, so I stepped into the water, sitting to let it cool me down. Of course that made me shiver when I walked back to Alexei.

 

"You are going to make yourself ill, Walter."

 

"You sound like a mother hen. What do we have for lunch?"

 

He smiled and handed me a plate with cheese, nicely cut up fruit, a chunk of the bread. I sat cross-legged beside him, letting the air dry my body and enjoyed my lunch. When we'd finished, I pulled him down to lie next to me.

 

"Alexei, what would happen if you died before the date of the sacrifice?"

 

"Are you offering to give me an easier death? Is that the real reason you wanted the herbs?"

 

"I told you the reason for the herbs."

 

"You forget I was right here as you set up and mixed your colors. You never used any of the herbs you bought."

 

"I haven't gotten to the colors I'll need them for yet."

 

"You didn't answer my first question."

 

"I could try to give you heart failure in bed but I don't think that would be very entertaining for me. If you asked, I would help you die an easier death. I would rather you be allowed to live."

 

"I would as well. I can not change what fate has decreed."

 

"I do not believe that the future is set. Things change. Now, will you tell me what they would do?"

 

"I believe it has only happened once. The Elders decreed that one of the gods did not want to share and so had taken the King for himself."

 

"Was his body then burned?"

 

"His family was allowed to bury him in the family plot."

 

"So nothing else was done? They did not take his heart?"

 

"No, he was given intact to his family. Why are you asking all these questions?"

 

"I am just trying to understand."

 

Not wanting him to get any ideas about my thoughts, I let the matter drop. I distracted him from further conversation by kissing him soundly. Pulling at his clothing, I soon had him naked next to me. We kissed for several long minutes before I pushed him onto his back and straddled his body.

 

He watched me as I bent to kiss each nipple. Then I pulled on them gently with my teeth. He moaned and his eyes closed, his head tilting back. So I nuzzled his throat. His hands lay above his head, open and relaxed, but then tightened into fists when I rubbed the crown of his cock with my fingers.

 

Moving down, I practiced the new skills I was learning. His hips lifted, his voice cried out my name. I reveled in making him sound so wild and needy. I was pleased, too, with my continued improvement in technique. This time when he climaxed, I didn't lose a drop. Lying next to him, I held him close as his heart calmed and his breathing evened out.

 

"If you get much better at that, Walter, you will surely cause my heart to give out."

 

"I just wish to give you the pleasure you give to me."

 

We dozed then and when we woke, it was late in the day. I dressed and loaded the mule. Before we mounted for the trip down, I secreted the herbs underneath the paints and other items in the case.

 

Over the next few weeks we made many trips to the mountain. It was the one place we felt that we had some privacy. In the fall I painted the vista of the trees with the riot of fall colors on them. I hated the coming of winter because it heralded the end of our trips there.

 

His uncle had stayed away for months; Alexei told me his uncle normally spent the summer at his other home. With his return came the return of greater stress for Alexei. We had just finished our morning lovemaking and had entered the pool when he came in. I smelled his odious stench before he got close to us.

 

"Nephew, how are you?"

 

I sat quietly and waited for whatever charade he had planned to play out.

 

"I am in good health, thank you, Sir."

 

"I see he is still here. I expected you to be tired of him by now. Is he at least properly broken in now?"

 

"He has accepted his place. He obeys me. I require nothing else from him." After spending the last months with him I could hear the strain in his voice.

 

"Have you taken up painting? I saw the landscape on the easel in the parlor."

 

"Walter painted that, he sketches as well."

 

"He has talents, then. He does not look the sort to be artistic."

 

"I did not know one had to look a particular way to have talent."

 

"Well, he certainly does not have the look of a male whore, either, but he seems to fulfil the role."

 

I tried to turn off my mind at that point. His words should not have bothered me, but they did. I did not like being thought of as a whore, not even by the likes of him. I looked over to see Alexei's eyes fastened on me and read the lie in them.

 

"As a whore, he would fail, miserably. His distaste for the act would send him to the poorhouse."

 

Sir Charles laughed then and turned to leave but swung back at the last minute.

 

"I want the landscape."

 

Inside I screamed no, on the outside I remained calm. The picture was a reminder of a splendid day spent with a wonderful man. The idea of his having any part of us was abhorrent to me.

 

"I wish to keep it, Sir Charles. You may, of course, have it when I am gone."

 

"Very well. I will expect you to come for winter festival. Leave the whore here."

 

He left as I erupted from the pool. Alexei was out and wrapped around me before I could exit the room. His voice was a low hiss in my ear.

 

"What do you intend to do, Walter? Anything you do to him will get you killed. Do not leave me to face the rest of my year alone."

 

The idea of dying was not what stopped me – it was the idea of leaving him alone, of leaving him to die. By this point I had most of my plans made. I had arranged for his aunt and cousin to go to my homeland in the spring. I had no intention of taking him away and leaving them at the mercy of Sir Charles.

 

My family had written that they would give them a small cottage that my elderly aunt had once lived in. I wanted them well away so that his uncle could not make victims of them when Alexei was gone. I had not even discussed this with him yet. The letter had been burned to keep anyone from learning of it.

 

"Will your aunt and cousin be at the winter festival with you?"

 

"No, the only reason I will be there is so he can brag about his family providing this year's King."

 

"How long will you be away?"

 

"A week. You do not need to worry. I will leave very explicit orders for the guards."

 

"I would like to visit with your aunt while you are away."

 

I had met them and found both to be sweet and kind. They had let me know that they accepted Alexei as he was. Unsaid, was the fact that they were glad he had companionship.

 

"I will leave orders for you to visit them."

 

"Good. Come let me bathe you, so we may dine, else you may be devoured."

 

He chuckled as I led him back to the water. Winter festival would be a good time for his aunt and cousin to disappear. Now, I just needed a distraction to keep anyone from looking for them.

 

During the night the perfect solution came to me. The next morning I announced to Alexei that I needed more paint supplies. The thinner used for my paints would start a very nice fire. His guards didn't seem to care that the crazy consort wanted to paint at Alexei's Aunt Rose's small cottage.

 

She and I spoke quietly as her daughter, offering them tea, distracted the guards. It was so very hard to pretend I knew nothing as he mourned their loss when he was told the house had burned to the ground.

 

**********

 

My uncle had ordered me to keep him company the last night of my stay there. At first, I thought he would want to force himself on me again. I almost wish he had when I found out the real reason.

 

"Alexei, Walter seems to be fond of you."

 

I laughed, hoping to avert his attention from the subject by making light of it.

 

"No he isn't. He considers me a rapist. He will be relieved to see me sacrificed. As a matter of fact, he will probably leave town before the ashes cool on my pyre."

 

"Maybe he would find my company more agreeable. I would be willing to give him anything he wants."

 

"He wants his freedom, nothing more. He is not a pauper to be dazzled by wealth. If he were, he would not still be fighting me."

 

"I understand he does not fight you as he once did."

 

"That is only because he knows I will just have him tied and do as I please with him. He has learned it is easier to accept than be hurt."

 

"He would learn that here, if need be. The challenge of an unwilling partner is quite appealing."

 

"The only reason he accepts me, is that he sees the end. If you put him in a situation with no end, he will kill you or himself."

 

"You truly believe that?"

 

"Yes, I do. He has said as much to me. That, added to the fact that his family knows where he is and when he expects to go home, would make it most unlikely that you would enjoy his company for long."

 

"When you let him contact his family why did he not ask them to come rescue him?"

 

"He pities me."

 

I allowed my fear for Walter to show in my eyes, knowing my uncle would misread me. He nodded slowly.

 

"Well then, I had best find someone else to amuse me. It is late; we should get some rest. You will pardon me if I do not see you off in the morning?"

 

"Of course, I know you are a busy man."

 

I did not sleep well that night, and when I managed to doze off, I had evil dreams.

 

I returned from my uncle's house to find that my aunt and cousin had died in a fire that had burned their cottage to the ground. Even though my heart was broken, the tragedy did lift one worry from my shoulders. That left me with only the need to protect Walter.

 

He held me as I mourned for them, letting me cry like a child. Eventually I slept, feeling safe in his arms. Some time in the wee hours of the morning, I woke. He was curved around my body; his cock nestled between my cheeks. His lips sucked gently at the juncture of my throat and my shoulder.

 

His hand was gripping me firmly, thumb rubbing over the slit. I reached back to rub my hand along his flank.

 

"You smell and taste so good, Alexei. I never dreamed it could be this good with a man."

 

"I guess I have ruined you for women."

 

"Yes, I would say that you have."

 

I turned my head for a kiss. As his tongue entered me, I found myself wanting him inside me. After what my uncle had done to me, I never expected to want sex that way again. With Walter, I felt it would be right. I knew he would never hurt me.

 

I pulled away from him to get the oil and he rolled onto his stomach.

 

"Not like that, Walter."

 

"Alexei?"

 

"I want you inside me."

 

"But I…"

 

"Just go slowly and make sure you are very slick."

 

I positioned myself on my back and pulled my legs up high. He knelt; there was just enough light for me to see him coating his erection with the oil. He reached out tentatively to stroke the remainder over my hole. His finger probed cautiously. I lifted my hips to encourage him. He sucked in his breath.

 

"Alexei, are you sure? Be sure, because I do not think I can stop once I start."

 

"I won't ask you to stop. I want this, Walter. I want you."

 

Bending low, he kissed me fiercely, stealing my breath. Then he straightened to position himself at my entrance. He pushed into me slowly, and when he was in all the way, he took another kiss.

 

"I now understand the reason you enjoy this so much."

 

"Tight, isn't it?" I flexed my muscles around him and reveled in his gasp.

 

"Stop that!"

 

"Why?" Although I was sure I knew the reason.

 

"I would like it to last some little time."

 

He began to move in me then, slow and easy. I clung to the strong arms on either side of me, wanting to crawl inside him and be with him always.

 

After some time had passed, he made a low growling noise. Before I knew what was happening, he was on his knees and had me pulled up to straddle his lap. Kissing me deeply, before grinning against my lips he whispered: "That is better, now I can touch more of you."

 

To illustrate his point, he grabbed my ass with both hands and squeezed. I wrapped my arms around his neck and held on. He rocked us then, his movements becoming stronger as he neared his climax. I sucked new marks on his throat as my own body drew closer. His movements were causing his stomach to press and rub my erection.

 

His hands were all over my back and ass, rubbing, kneading, sometimes pinching. I gasped as he drove up hard into me, filling me with his heat. His lips caressed my ear as he spoke.

 

"You are mine, now, forever."

 

I clung to him humping against his body and quickly covered him with my juices. We stayed in that position until his legs began to cramp, then stretched out once more. Lying next to him I listened as his breathing evened out and when I knew he slept I allowed my sorrow to escape in silent sobs.

 

*********

 

For the next few weeks I kept my silence about his aunt and cousin. The letter from home said that *my* widowed aunt had moved back to her family. I smiled and felt relieved that part of my plans had worked so well.

 

I had been a little nervous that the ruins of the house would tell the tale, but no one seemed inclined to search them in any way. So it was time to move to the next part of my plan. I ground the herbs I had purchased, adding to them certain things I had gathered late in the summer and early fall, keeping them with my art supplies.

 

I had planned to wait until very close to the end of his year to use them, but fate had different ideas.

 

Alexei had been very enthusiastic about allowing me to make love to him. We had agreed that we would only do that late at night when there was almost no chance of being observed. So all of the times I entered him were completed in darkness. He still took me when the mood struck and we were observed often. I had learned to ignore them and turn my pleasure into mock pain and anger.

 

But one night we had drawn it out so long and the climax had been so hard that I fell asleep on his back. His uncle picked that next morning to visit – early. He found us in the position we had gone to sleep, my cock still lodged inside Alexei. His loud voice woke me.

 

"Guards, come here! Seize that man, he has raped the King!"

 

I was pulled roughly from the bed. Alexei was screaming at them to let me go. The last thing I saw before they dragged me from the room was Alexei falling to the floor as a blow delivered by his uncle left him unconscious.

 

I was thrown into a cell in the cellar under the church. For the next week I saw no one except my jailer and the rats that shared the cold space with me. When I finally did see someone else, I was sickened by his presence.

 

I heard his voice and readied myself for him as best I could. Being naked afforded no hope of any dignity.

 

"Walter, I came to tell you what a lucky man you are."

 

"Lucky?"

 

"Yes, lucky. There was no permanent damage done to my nephew. He is still suffering headaches from the blow you gave him…"

 

I threw myself at the bars at that point, not because he was lying but because he had hurt my lover. He stood and laughed as I howled like an animal. I stopped when my energy was gone and sank down onto the floor.

 

"I also came to make you an offer."

 

I sat quietly and waited, sure that his offer would turn my stomach.

 

"Do you want to hear it?"

 

"Just say what you came here to say and leave me alone."

 

"The Elders will never allow you to go back to the King's residence. Alexei keeps telling them to let you return to your homeland. They want you punished for your abuse of the King. They examined him you see, and the results convinced them you must have raped him more than that one night. He has several scars."

 

"I never hurt him." I knew I should be silent but I could not bear letting him say that I was to blame for the scars he had left.

 

"Surely, you do not expect to be believed?"

 

That time I held my tongue.

 

"Well, I offered a compromise to them. I will see you punished. Then I will hold you prisoner at my home until after the sacrifice. They will allow you to leave after that to avoid problems with your homeland."

 

"I would rather rot in this cell than keep company with you."

 

"Suit yourself. But be aware that Alexei's life could be less pleasant than it is now and the Elders would never know."

 

"Bastard!"

 

He laughed then, a horrible, demented laugh. "I will just let you think about it for a few more days. You may decide that a warm spot in my bed is preferable to a cold stone floor."

 

He left me then; I crawled into the corner of the cell and tried to figure out what to do.

 

**********

 

It had been over a week since my uncle had found us sleeping. My vision was still blurry from the hard blow he had given me. I knew that Walter was still alive but I had been unable to convince the Elders to send him home.

 

My uncle had brought in his physician to examine me while I was still unconscious. The cowardly fool had told the Elders that my previous injuries were the result of Walter's rapes. Anything I might have said concerning how I was injured would not be believed.

 

I was resting when the Captain of the guards came to see me.

 

"Lord, may I speak privately with you?"

 

"What is it, Captain?"

 

"Fresh air might do you some good, a short ride perhaps, on the grounds, so that we do not need to take a contingent of guards. You will be safe on the grounds with just me in attendance."

 

I nodded to show I understood.

 

"That is an excellent idea, Captain. Have two horses saddled for us. I will be ready in a few minutes."

 

In a short while I was striding down the steps and mounting a horse for a short ride. He waited until we were far enough away from the house to have privacy.

 

"What did you wish to talk to me about, Captain."

 

"Your consort, Lord."

 

"What about him? Tell me quickly."

 

"Your uncle is attempting to force him to share his bed."

 

"What? How?"

 

"He told him the same story that he told the Elders. Threatened to make your last days harder if Walter will not consent. Walter must also consent to Sir Charles' punishment."

 

"No, that can not happen. I must get word to him. The Elders did say he could leave after the sacrifice."

 

"Your uncle does not intend to let him leave."

 

"How do you know this?"

 

"My cousin works in his house. He has been bragging for some time that he would have Walter after you are gone. This has just given him a way to do it now and rub your nose in the situation."

 

"He wants to hurt me even more than he has already. This is my fault. Walter will suffer because I could not bear to be alone."

 

"Lord, please. We can not be out here long, the others report to him."

 

"I understand. Why have you come to me with this? You know there is nothing I can do."

 

"Together we can. I will take Walter a message. Among the three of us we should be able to formulate a plan."

 

"Why are you doing this?"

 

"Sir Charles raped my younger sister. She was only thirteen, and died trying to bring his son into the world."

 

"I have never heard of any bastard children of my uncle."

 

"That is because he killed the child. I was away or I would have tried to stop him. I have pretended to believe his version of the story but my cousin told me the truth."

 

I heard the bitterness and hate in his voice so I decided to trust him.

 

"Give me this night to try and make a plan. We'll ride again tomorrow and I will give you a message for Walter."

 

By that time we had made the circuit of the grounds and were near the house again. We parted at the steps. I did not sleep that night – part of me feared that my uncle would show up to accuse me of conspiracy – the rest tried to figure out how to keep Walter safe and get him free.

 

**********

 

Ten days into my imprisonment, the Captain of Alexei's guards came to visit me. I was surprised to say the least, but stood and walked closer to the bars when he motioned to me. His hand reached through, I instinctively took what he held out.

 

Looking down I found a lock of Alexei's hair that had been curled tightly, then tied with a ribbon. I closed my fist around it, knowing that I would need to hide it well or dispose of it later.

 

"Listen carefully, Walter. My Lord Alexei and I are trying to find a way to set you free. He wants you to flee the country once we do that."

 

"I can not leave him to die."

 

"Would you kill his heart, before they kill his body?"

 

"What do you mean?"

 

"He feels great guilt for picking you as his consort. Had he not done that, his uncle would not be planning to make you his whore."

 

"I know what that bastard wants. I told him I'd rather rot here. He said I would be released after the sacrifice."

 

"He lies! He has no intention of letting you leave. He just wants you now so he can torture Lord Alexei by making him witness your shame."

 

"I assumed that was part of it. He is a foul creature to treat his kin this way."

 

"He is a dangerous man as well. Lord Alexei wants you free and safely away."

 

"Tell him I will not leave without him. It would probably be easier for me to get away if Sir Charles thinks me subjugated. I will accept Sir Charles' offer."

 

"You will be beaten in the Town Square. Lord Alexei will be forced to watch. While I know that will be hard for him, it will not be as hard as knowing what his uncle will do to you afterward."

 

"Yes, he has first hand knowledge. Tell him it must be this way."

 

"I will give him the message, but he will not be pleased."

 

I heard the resignation in his voice. He turned to walk away and I called him back. Leaning against the bars, I gave him a more personal message.

 

"Tell my Lord that it is my body only that will be touched. The parts of me that matter have only been touched by him and will ever only be touched by him. I am strong, I will survive to grow old with him."

 

"I pray that you are right."

 

I watched him walk away before moving back to the dark corner of my cell. Sitting with my back to the wall, I twined Alexei's hair around my fingers, brought it up to rub against my lips and breathed in the scent of the gillyflowers.

 

Then I prayed for Alexei to have the strength he would need. My words had been bold, but I had faith in our love, albeit unspoken, to get us through the coming ordeal.

 

When the guard came with my meal, I charged ahead.

 

"Please tell Sir Charles that I wish to speak to him."

 

He grunted in reply and walked away. It was late in the evening when Sir Charles stood outside my cell door.

 

"Have you considered my offer?"

 

I kept my head bowed as I answered.

 

"Yes. I will do as you wish."

 

"A man who sees reason. Think of it this way, Alexei's year is almost at a close. After the sacrifice, you will go free."

 

"Yes, free. That is all I really want, to be free to return to my homeland."

 

He turned from me to the guard. "Have the Elders and Lord Alexei notified that the prisoner will be punished on the morrow, at noon, in the town square."

 

"Yes, Sir Charles."

 

"And give him some water to wash, he stinks."

 

I dipped my head lower and bit my tongue to keep back my desired retort. I guess he could not smell his own odor. He left without another word. When my jailer brought me the water, I used a small amount of it to swallow Alexei's tightly tied hair. No matter what fate had in store for me I would have a part of my lover with me.

 

 

**********

 

I had waited impatiently for the Captain to return from seeing Walter, my horse saddled and ready for riding. He looked grim and my fear spiked. I am not sure how I kept my voice even as I berated him for keeping me waiting. He bowed his head as he made his apologies.

 

Once we were away from the house I turned to look at him.

 

"How is he?"

 

"Determined, strong, foolish."

 

"His health?"

 

"He has not been abused, merely kept nude and with little food and water."

 

"What did he have to say?"

 

"I would tell you the most important part first. He said, 'Tell my Lord that it is my body only that will be touched. The parts of me that matter have only been touched by him and will ever only be touched by him. I am strong I will survive to grow old with him.' "

 

"What does he mean his body touched?" I could hear the note of hysteria that was creeping into my voice.

 

"He is going to tell Sir Charles that he will go along with the punishment. He is going to convince Sir Charles that he is crushed. I do not know what he has planned from that point."

 

"No! He can not do that! He has no idea of what my uncle will do to him."

 

"Lord, please. You must get control. You will only add to your uncle's pleasure if he sees that Walter means so much to you. It might even make him hurt Walter more to torture you. I looked into Walter's eyes, Lord, he is strong; he will survive. Your love has made him strong, take strength from his love for you."

 

"Love? A love with no chance in this life."

 

"I do not believe that. I do not know his plan but I am sure it is a good one."

 

"We shall pray that is true."

 

We were silent as we made the rest of our circuit of the grounds. I spent the rest of the day in the small chapel offering my prayers to any god who might take pity and help us. By the evening I was calm and managed to hide my panic when the message came that Walter was to be punished in the square the next day.

 

It was spring and the next day was warm by the standards of the season, but not warm enough to be paraded out in public naked. Walter kept his head down and did not look at those around him. He did not struggle as they tied him to the post, nor did he respond in any way to the verbal taunting of the crowd.

 

His stoicism acted to help me stay in control. If he could take this, I would not make it harder by allowing my pain to add to his. I hid my hands beneath my clothing so no one would see the fists I was making. I had not felt so impotent since the night I had traded my body for medicine for my mother. I was learning that physical pain was easier to bear than watching the man you love being hurt.

 

I groaned inside when I saw who had been chosen to administer Walter's whipping. Sir Charles had chosen the largest and strongest of his contingent of guards. It was only the fact that I knew he wanted Walter that kept me still. He would not let him be beaten to death.

 

The leader of the Elders held up his hands for silence, then spoke.

 

"This man has broken the law. He laid hands on Lord Alexei and caused him injury, nearly killed him. As punishment he will receive twenty lashes. Let the sentence be carried out."

 

The long whip was shaken out, the strong arm lifted, the whistle and crack of the whip the only noise to be heard until the wet sound of skin being sliced open was added. That was followed by a low moan. Walter's head lifted then and his eyes fastened on mine.

 

I tried to send my love for him through that link. It seemed to work temporarily. He made no sound with the next three strokes. The fourth was delivered to overlay the first and he screamed. I heard my uncle's sigh of appreciation at the expression of pain he was responsible for and wished for a blade to slit his throat.

 

Walter blessedly lost consciousness with the tenth blow. His weight pulling on the ropes caused his wrists to start running with blood as well as his back. When he was finally cut down, his body dropped like a stone to the ground.

 

"Alexei, you may have your people attend him. Then have him brought to my house this evening."

 

I summoned the Captain and issued brief orders. I know my uncle was doing this to stab at me. By giving me the job of nursing him, he ensured I would see Walter's pain up close. But that didn't matter; what mattered was that I would have a short time with him, to offer what comfort I could.

 

He was placed face down in a wagon for the trip to the house. Once there, I pushed the others away and cleaned his wounds myself. Several of the cuts were deep, one cut to the bone on his shoulder. I pulled the edges together and stitched them, glad that he was out and did not feel that part. He will carry the scars for all of his life. I covered him with a light sheet and waited for him to awaken. I had laudanum near-by to ease his pain.

 

As I waited, I washed the rest of his body carefully, pulling the sheet away from a small area at a time. He woke with a loud groan that sliced through my heart.

 

"Walter, I'm here. I have laudanum."

 

"No, that will make me too groggy. I must have my wits about me."

 

His hand flailed out blindly as the tears he couldn't stop ran from his eyes. I took his hand in mine and he squeezed down on it.

 

"In my art supplies, I have the herbs I bought. One of those mixed with a cream of some sort will ease the pain."

 

I turned to the Captain, the only one I had allowed to stay in the room and barked an order.

 

"His supplies are in the parlor. Bring them."

 

He ran from the room. I leaned down to whisper in his ear.

 

"I am sorry, Walter. God! How I want him dead. Why did you give in to him?"

 

"Had to. Only way to have a fighting chance. Couldn't go down without trying." His voice was little more than a whisper.

 

"Stubborn fool."

 

"Are we alone?"

 

"Yes."

 

"I love you, Alexei. No matter what happens after today, I will never regret what we have had."

 

"Fool, pigheaded fool." I pressed my lips to his cheek then whispered; "I love you."

 

"Lord, here are the supplies."

 

I pointed to the floor by the bed. The Captain knelt, opened the case so that Walter could point to what he needed. I took the pouch he indicated and mixed the amount he directed into the cream he normally used on his hands after cleaning the paint from them.

 

"Give me something to bite on, I don't wish the servants to carry tales to him of my screaming."

 

Picking up a small pillow, the Captain slit it with his dagger, and we rolled the cloth into a tight gag for him. Looking up at the Captain, I asked his help.

 

"Hold on to his hands, please. Walter, I will do this as quickly as I can."

 

The Captain squatted next to the bed and took hold of the hand I released as Walter held out his other one. Pulling the sheet away from his body, I used as delicate a touch as I could but he still screamed against the gag.

 

When I finished, he let the Captain loose. I watched as the Captain shook his hands to get the blood flowing again. I helped pull the gag from Walter's mouth. Picking up the cloth I had used to wash him, I wiped the sweat from his face.

 

The Captain rose and moved to stand at the door but turned his back to us. I sat holding Walter's hand until the ointment did its job. He pushed up slightly to look at me.

 

"How are you, Alexei?"

 

I laughed at the ridiculousness of his worrying over me when he was the one with his back cut to ribbons. He smiled and pulled me down so that he could lean over me. His mouth covered mine; I held his face since that was the only place I was relatively sure did not hurt.

 

"I have missed you, Alexei."

 

"And I you, Walter. We will not have much time. I have been ordered to send you to him later."

 

"I assumed as much. Are you sure we can trust the Captain?"

 

"I believe he wants my uncle bested. He is the one who told me of my uncle's plans."

 

"Will there be any occasion soon for you and your uncle to share a meal?"

 

"I would have said no, but I am sure he will want to flaunt his hold on you in front of me."

 

"Good, that will work well. There is another pouch in my kit, hidden underneath the paints."

 

I moved from the bed to search the paint kit. I found the pouch he spoke of. He took it from my hand to open it carefully.

 

"I had planned to drug you before the day of the sacrifice. Ingesting a small portion of this will make you appear dead. Your body functions will be so slowed that even most physicians will believe that you are dead."

 

"That is why you asked all the questions about King's dying before the sacrifice. I don't believe this will work, Walter. The King I told you of had family who loved him. Sir Charles will probably have them move the date forward and pretend I am still alive."

 

"Not if he is out of the picture."

 

"What do you mean?"

 

"We shall give it to him first. Once he is gone, then we wait until the day before your sacrifice and you will just go quietly to sleep. They will probably assume it to be a malady that runs in the family."

 

"Does it work through the system or do you need an antidote?"

 

"Given enough time the body will come around, but I do have an antidote that I will give you as soon as we are safe."

 

"Are you saying that my uncle will wake in his crypt?"

 

His eyes stared into mine. "Is that a problem?"

 

"Only if we do not cut the bell cord."

 

I had never thought of myself as cold but my uncle had hurt too many people I loved. Caused too many deaths. I felt the gods would want him to suffer.

 

Some may wonder at my willingness to put my life in Walter's hands, but if I were wrong about him it would shorten my life by only a day. And the death he offered would be an easier one. I called to the Captain to join us.

 

**********

 

The Captain came to sit on the floor by the bed when Alexei called to him. I was still not sure we could completely trust him but I was willing to let Alexei make that decision.

 

"How will we do this, Walter? I hate the idea of your being with him any longer than absolutely necessary."

 

"First, Alexei, tell me what it is that he enjoys."

 

"Why on earth would you ask that?"

 

"Because I plan on giving him as few reasons as possible to find pleasure with me."

 

"I understand, but I am afraid that might make him so angry that he beats you."

 

"I would rather have him beat me than use my body for his pleasure." I saw the pained look in his eyes and struggled to sit so I could hold him. He allowed it as I whispered to him. "You did what you had to do, it makes you no less a man. Do you feel I am less, for coming to enjoy what we have?"

 

He turned and buried his face in my throat and I felt his lips suck for just a moment. Pulling away he went to summon a servant.

 

"Bring us food and water."

 

We were all silent as we waited for the servant to return. As soon as I saw the water I felt thirst. Only the pain had kept me from feeling it sooner. I would have gulped it down if Alexei had not stopped me.

 

"Sip, Walter, you do not want to be getting sick right now."

 

I knew he was right, so I sipped the water between the bites he held out to me. He talked as he fed me, telling me of his uncle's twisted desires. When my hunger and thirst were sated, we gathered closer together to talk of my plans.

 

I showed them the amount that would be needed to fake a death.

 

"Should it be added to food or maybe wine?" the Captain asked.

 

"Either will work. If placed in food it should be something of a strong flavor. The taste is not bad but it is enough different to tip off most palates."

 

"That should not matter with him. That foul weed he partakes of should cover most any taste." Alexei sneered as he spoke.

 

"I would suggest that it not be done for several days. If done too soon, Walter will be suspect. I hate that it will leave you with him, but I see no other way for your safety."

 

"I agree Alexei. I also think we need to find a way to give it to him so that you will not fall under suspicion."

 

"Excuse me, Walter, but I feel that is less important. Lord Alexei is the King. He has a death sentence all ready. They would not bother to avenge Sir Charles' death if they believe it to be Alexei. Sir Charles does have enemies among the Elders. More than one of them would be glad to see him dead."

 

"Then it is just a matter of getting it in his food."

 

"Walter, he will more than likely treat you as a servant. It will be more a matter of distraction and getting the dosage to you to add."

 

"Lord Alexei, my cousin works there."

 

"I do not wish to involve anyone else in this. The more people involved, the more chance of failure."

 

"I understand, Lord..."

 

He was about to say more but the man who had administered my beating that morning marched into the room.

 

"It is time for the prisoner to go to Sir Charles."

 

I looked at Alexei, knowing the pain in his face was reflected in mine. I rose stiffly and followed the man from the room without a word of protest. I was marched through the streets naked, no doubt to add to my feeling of vulnerability. Sir Charles could have no clue that allowing Alexei to care for me had strengthened us both for the coming ordeals.

 

I entered the house determined to give Sir Charles as little satisfaction as possible. He looked up as I was ushered into the room, standing he walked around me. Without warning his hand raked over one of the whip marks on my back. I cringed but managed to keep my pain silent.

 

"What is this mixture that has been smeared on you?"

 

"Herbs mixed with cream to help with healing." I did not mention its pain relieving aspects for fear he would order it washed off.

 

"Has my nephew taken up doctoring? Or is this something used on the horses."

 

"I do not know, Sir Charles."

 

He walked away from me calling over his shoulder, "Take him to my bedchamber. You may rest until I am ready for you."

 

I followed the servant up the winding stairs and was shown into a room. The smell of tobacco was even stronger here than it had been downstairs. The room was opulent, the bed large. I walked over to the window, sat carefully on the window seat and opened the window for fresh air. Cold be damned, I needed to breathe.

 

He did not make me wait long; I was both grateful and disturbed. I had always been one to stand up and face difficulty, but this was more than I had ever been burdened with. He stood staring at me for a long minute.

 

"Close the window and come here."

 

I did as I was told and soon stood in front of him with my head down.

 

"Look at me!"

 

I lifted my head and met his eyes. His hand reached out and rubbed over my cheek. I managed to stay still while gritting my teeth.

 

"I can see why my nephew was attracted to you. You are not a handsome man but you do have a presence about you. Are you as strong as you appear?"

 

"I am strong enough."

 

His hand raised and I was backhanded, hard. I felt my lip split and the blood start to flow. I made no effort to staunch the flow.

 

"You will address me properly when I speak to you. Do you understand?"

 

"Yes, Sir Charles."

 

"Good! Get on the bed."

 

I moved across the room to lie down on my stomach on the bed. I heard the sounds as he moved around the room and all too soon his knee was pushing my legs apart. When I did not comply quickly enough his hand came down hard on my back. I grunted with the pain and was very glad that the cuts had been treated with the herbal salve.

 

I didn't manage to keep back the scream as he entered me. Alexei had always made sure he was slicked well with oil before he entered me. And not once had he rammed into me in so vicious a manner. The bastard made no concession to my pain or the pull and tear of my flesh. When he was finished I lay bleeding and sore.

 

"Get out of my bed. Go sleep in the corner." He pushed me so that I fell from the bed.

 

I crawled across the room to the corner where I had noticed a blanket earlier. I lay upon it, sickened by his stench on me, and the feel of my blood mixed with his seed running from my body. Soon, blessed sleep pulled me down, my body too abused to stay alert any longer.

 

*********

 

Walter had been at my uncle’s house for a week before I was summoned to dinner. I was shocked at the change in his appearance, but kept that to myself as best I could. I wanted to comfort him, but knew I must make every effort to keep my uncle focused elsewhere.

 

I had brought the amount of the herbs Walter had indicated to me, and was prepared to get them to him at the first possible moment.

 

I knew that the Captain’s cousin was primed as well to help with the effort. The Captain had convinced me that the assistance was necessary.

 

"Alexei, so good to see you. I am pleased that you could take time to dine with me."

 

"I did not believe that I had any choice in the matter. Did you not wish to flaunt your new bed warmer?"

 

"I really do not understand why you enjoyed him, Alexei. He is really nothing special. You were much more sport."

 

"Maybe you just do not know how to get the proper response. Or mayhap I ruined him for others."

 

It was a dangerous game I was playing but I had to take something back before he was left to die.

 

"Do you feel that you learned that much from me, boy?"

 

"I take a different approach, that is all. Sometimes a little kindness goes a long way."

 

"Kindness is weak, boy, have I not told you that?"

 

"Yes, Sir Charles."

 

He turned to Walter with an order. "Bring me a glass of wine and one for the King as well."

 

Walter moved to the cabinet and poured two glasses to bring to us. He handed the first to my uncle and as he held out the second to me, one of the servants dropped a platter. All heads turned except ours. I pressed the small cloth of herbs into Walter’s hand.

 

He kept it tucked into his hand as he moved to help pick up the tray. After that he knelt next to my uncle’s chair and waited.

 

It was several minutes of thrust and parry conversation before my uncle issued his next order to Walter.

 

"Bring me my dinner, Walter. Make yourself useful in some way."

 

Walter rose carefully and moved to do as he was bid. Soon my uncle had a plate of food sitting in front of him.

 

I watched as he ate, barely touching the food that Walter had put in front of me. I had seen the small cloth peeking from under the edge of my plate. I tucked it away quickly to dispose of it when I reached my residence.

 

It was not long before my uncle had completed his meal. I waited, having no clue as to how long it would take the herbs to do their job.

 

Walter was sitting next to my uncle’s chair, at his feet. I cringed each time he caressed Walter’s head, wanting to rip his hand away.

 

"Alexei, now that Walter is no longer a part of your life you should make the Elders happy and bed the girls they wish you to. I give my word that any child you sire I will adopt and raise as my own."

 

The thought was far from comforting. Again, I felt the need to jab at him and spoke slowly.

 

"Sir Charles, I would not leave a child in your gentle hands."

 

"Nephew, you cut me to the quick. I would love the child and give it the best of everything."

 

"Until it was old enough to share your bed?"

 

"If she turned out as pretty as her father, I might allow her to give me a real heir."

 

"I would cut off my manhood before I fathered a child for you to raise." I could not keep the sneer from my voice.

 

"Alexei, is that any way to talk to your father?"

 

To say I was stunned would be an understatement. Then my outrage came to the fore.

 

"You lie! My mother told me who my father was. How dare you lie to me now."

 

I was on my feet standing over him, my fury raging.

 

He smirked at me and I knew it to be his way of twisting a knife in my gut. I moaned in horror at rising to his bate. I forced myself to sit back down.

 

I risked a quick look at Walter to get control of my emotions. Seeing him sitting so quietly, head down, seemingly subdued, I calmed. I sat back to await the ‘death’ of my uncle. Mercifully, the wait was short.

 

As my uncle began to choke, Walter held out the wineglass, his face looking concerned. I watched, enjoying the flush of color that rose to Sir Charles' face as he tried to breathe. I leaned toward him, patting his back.

 

"Sir Charles, what is it?" Putting my lips near his ear I hissed, "You will never hurt anyone I love again, you smelly old bastard."

 

His eyes widened and I knew he understood. He clawed at me, but Walter's strong hands gripped his and pulled him back. Pushing him down, to lie on the floor, Walter continued his solicitous act. The servants hated him, so none of them made a move to help in any way.

 

Sir Charles waved his hands, eyes panicked, everyone except Walter and I stood and watched. We fussed over him, making the charade complete. I did not order his physician to be called until his struggles stopped.

 

"You – go for Sir Charles' physician."

 

As we waited for the man to arrive, I dismissed most of the servants, keeping just the Captain and his cousin there to act as witnesses. The physician arrived and hurried to my uncle's side.

 

"What happened?"

 

"We ate dinner and he was talking when suddenly he began to choke. We offered wine and Walter tried to help him but he just turned bright red and then stopped breathing."

 

We stood back as the physician worked over him for several minutes. Finally, he raised his head.

 

"I am sorry, Lord. Your uncle is dead."

 

"That can not be, he was in fine health."

 

"It appears that his heart gave out. I will summon the undertaker to prepare him for burial."

 

"In the family crypt, Doctor."

 

"Yes, of course."

 

He left the room and we stood still for a moment, before I launched myself at Walter. His arms wrapped around me and we clung to each other.

 

"Lord, might I suggest that I take Walter back to your residence? Before the Elders arrive."

 

"Yes, that's a good idea. Then come back for me."

 

"Yes, Lord."

 

"We will talk when I get home later." I reassured Walter.

 

He gave me one final squeeze and then hurried from the room with the Captain. The meeting with the Elders went better than I expected. My uncle was not loved, so they saw no reason to doubt his own physician's word. They did not even ask about Walter.

 

Once my uncle's body was taken away to be prepared, I hurried back home. Walter was soaking in the pool when I entered. I undressed hurriedly and slid into the water with him.

 

"Relax, Walter. Let the water sooth you. I will watch over you this night."

 

He leaned back against me and soon he was sleeping. I quietly ordered the servants to bring more hot water when it started to cool. I waited until we were quite wrinkled before waking him enough for us to move to the bed. I didn't sleep that night; I just held on to him and waited for the new day to dawn.

 

*********

 

I woke the next morning with Alexei wrapped firmly around me. He had dark smudges under his eyes, which told me he had not slept much. I slipped from his arms to relieve myself and when I came back he was still lying as I had left him. I decided he needed rest so I went in search of sustenance.

 

I was finishing my meal when the Captain came into the room.

 

"Walter, how are you this morning?"

 

"Still sore. Sir Charles was not a considerate man, to put it mildly. Sleeping on the floor like a dog after sleeping in Alexei's bed was not good for my aging body."

 

"I can imagine. Is milord still sleeping?"

 

"Yes. I don't think he got much sleep last night."

 

"The Elders will probably arrive soon to talk to him about the arrangements. It might be best if they do not see you."

 

"I agree, Walter."

 

I turned to see Alexei making his way toward us. He stopped next to me and bent to place a soft kiss on my head.

 

"You should be sleeping, Alexei. You look so tired."

 

He moved to take a seat before he answered.

 

"I am, but I need to take care of things. I would scold you for letting me sleep but I understand your reasons. Would you get me some breakfast?"

 

I got up quickly, putting far more on the plate than he was likely to eat. He had started talking to the Captain and I listened quietly.

 

"Have any messages arrived this morning?"

 

"Only one saying that the Elders will attend you at the noon meal."

 

"No doubt so that they may enjoy the King's table. Did you instruct the cooks?"

 

"Yes, Lord. They had anticipated the need for additional supplies. The word of your uncle's death spread quickly."

 

I placed the overflowing plate in front of him and he grinned up at me.

 

"Walter, I am in mourning, I can not possibly eat this much."

 

"You have lost some flesh in the last weeks. Eat as much as you can."

 

"We must discuss this authoritarian tendency you are developing."

 

I caught the Captain trying to stifle his chuckle as he watched us. I squeezed Alexei's shoulder then sat down next to him.

 

"You may beat me later if you feel the need."

 

At that, the Captain gave up and guffawed. Alexei snickered as well. Then he took a bite of his meal before resuming his conversation.

 

"Captain, you will of course inspect the crypt personally to be sure that all is in perfect order for my uncle's interment."

 

"Yes, Lord. You can count on me to make sure everything is as it should be."

 

"Good, thank you. Give us some privacy, would you, Captain."

 

The Captain bowed and left the room. Alexei's hand reached out to me and I held it.

 

"Walter, I will need to be away for a good portion of the day tomorrow. I'll have the Captain stay with you, although I do not believe they will even question where you are now that he is gone. His funeral will be held early, but then the Elders will expect me to put on a show of mourning at the church."

 

"I understand, Alexei. I will spend the time painting, I have a project in mind."

 

We sat silently, as he ate one-handed, neither of us wanting to break the connection. After he ate, we bathed and I oiled his body, taking time to bring him to climax. He reached for me but I pushed him gently away.

 

"Walter?"

 

"I need some time, Alexei. Please understand."

 

"I am sorry. I should have thought of that, I remember how I felt after…"

 

"I will be fine, Alexei. He will not ruin what we have, I swear it."

 

I gave him a warm hug, then dressed him quickly, it was getting close to noon and I wanted the Elders to have no excuse to invade the private areas of his home. After a quick kiss, he left to await them in the drawing room. I gave myself permission to go back to bed; I had not slept much in the last two weeks.

 

When I woke later, Alexei was sleeping next to me, not touching but close. I moved toward him and rested my hand on his hip. He sighed, migrated toward my body and wrapped an arm around me. Again I slept; neither of us woke until near dawn.

 

In the early hours of the day, he asked me to love him and I did. Slowly, carefully, and we made it last a long time. When we calmed afterward, he pressed a sweet kiss to my lips.

 

"Thank you, Walter. Now the day will be easier to endure."

 

I again helped him bathe and dress, then sent him out with a single kiss. I spent my day in front of a canvas, trying to avoid thinking of what he was living through.

 

*********

 

The ceremony surrounding my uncle's burial was lavish. Had I felt anything other than loathing for him, I might have considered it a just tribute. But as it was I found it to be a bit too much. The Elders had sent word to his remaining brother that he must come and take over the title.

 

I had never met my uncle Jeffery. As the youngest of the family, he had left home to make his way before I was born. I was sure the ascent to the family title and lands would not be unwelcome. In any case, there was no way for him to arrive before the services.

 

In the afternoon, alone in the church I knelt, but my thoughts were not of my uncle, or even of guilt for my part in his fate. My thoughts were of the man waiting for me at my home, the man who would end my public life, while giving me a private life far away.

 

I had seen the new marks on his body; I did not need to be told how they got there or who had inflicted them. I prayed that he would forgive me for my part in it all. Although, he seemed to feel affection for me still, our words of love from a fortnight before had not been repeated.

 

So, sacrilegious as it may have been, I prayed only for myself. Late in the day, when I returned home, he was waiting for me, dinner and wine ready, and his strong hands to sooth me into sleep.

 

During the next few weeks, we kept to the house mostly. I showed myself in public when I had to, but I claimed grief as a reason to avoid most outings. I did not think the Elders believed me but they did not make a hubbub.

 

Walter still pulled away from me when I tried to make love to him. He would love me when I asked and his hands brought me release often, but I was sorrowful, afraid that he might never want that again, but I was determined to give him all the time he needed.

 

I had been selfish enough; first forcing him to share my bed, turning him from all he had believed himself to be, and finally, delivering him to my uncle.

 

My year was winding down, and we had received word that my Uncle Jeffery would arrive within a week. One night, after we bathed he pulled me toward our bed. Holding me close, he whispered his plans.

 

"Alexei, I think it is best that you die before your uncle arrives. Best all around that we be gone by then."

 

"Yes, I agree. They will require me to be laid out for viewing."

 

"Do not worry, they will see no sign of life. Believe in me, Alexei."

 

I looked into his eyes and nodded. He kissed me, then murmured, "Make love to me."

 

I pulled back to look into his eyes once more, seeing only love. I almost whimpered with my desire for him. I rose swiftly to get the oil and when I turned back he was lying with his hips propped on the pillows. I prepped myself quickly but when I knelt between his legs I froze.

 

"Alexei?"

 

His eyes focused on mine, reading the fear I suddenly could not suppress, "Ah, 'Lexi, I want this but not for the reason you may think. I know you fear this may not work and your life will soon be over. It will work; you will be free to grow old with me. I am the one who should fear. There are much prettier men who will want you and try to take you from me."

 

"Never!"

 

"I intend to hold you to that. Now, take me, make us both fly."

 

I bent low to kiss him, a wet sloppy, mouth-claiming kiss. His legs wrapped around me, pulling me closer. I felt his hand reaching between us, finding my cock and guiding it to his opening. Once it was positioned, his legs tightened more, his hips lifting; I pushed forward to slide inside him.

 

He gasped into my mouth; I pulled back thinking I had hurt him.

 

"No, don't leave me!"

 

The need in his voice brought a smile to my lips. So I rocked, slowly taking pleasure from his tight body and his words that spiraled around us. He was covered with a sheen of sweat as he arched up to meet my every thrust. His words lost any meaning as he neared his climax.

 

Gripping him firmly, I stroked, holding still deep inside him, he jerked in my hand painting me with his seed.

 

"'Lexi – God!"

 

His sphincter convulsing around me sent me falling over the edge after him. I dropped to lie on his chest as his legs slipped from around me. His hands soothed me as we panted for several long minutes.

 

Later I rose from the bed to order tea. When the tea was brought, I sent the servants away, and watched as he measured the herbs into my cup, adding more honey than I normally put in my tea. I smiled at him as I took the cup, drinking it down quickly before I could have second thoughts or make him think I doubted him.

 

He rinsed the cup when I finished, throwing the contents off the balcony. Taking my hand, he led me to the bed, holding me close. When the pain started and I had to fight for my breath, he spoke piercingly to me.

 

"Alexei, look at me! I am here. I love you. I will bring you out the other side. Do not fear."

 

Fighting down my panic, I gripped him with both hands, as the world started to go gray. He kissed my lips.

 

"Sleep, my love. I will be here when you wake."

 

**********

 

When Alexei lay dead I moved quickly to take care of the other portions of my plan. The remaining herbs I mixed into my paints and I used them to finish the portrait I had been painting of him. Then I cleaned my brushes and lay down next to him to await the morning.

 

I pretended sleep when the servants entered the room the next morning. When the scream of the servant broke the air, I scrambled from the bed.

 

"The King is dead!"

 

Faking horror at having been sleeping next to a corpse, "My god! He cannot be dead. He was fine last night."

 

The shouting brought the Captain into the room. He turned to one of the guards with instructions to call a physician, the same one who had examined Sir Charles. Coming over to me he took my arm and pulled me across the room.

 

"Walter, stay here, out of the way. I will take care of this."

 

I nodded with wide eyes, hoping I looked as scared as I should after finding myself in bed with a dead man. I sat as though dazed as the room filled with people. I was ignored for the most part, only one Elder wandered over to look at me. I turned to him with the blankest expression I could manage and he left me alone after his questions failed to get a response.

 

"Captain, the consort seems to be addled."

 

"He woke to shouts that the King was dead, I think, despite everything, he has come to feel affection for the King. It would be a shock to anyone to wake next to the dead."

 

"I suppose you are right. I must question the physician."

 

I listened to the conversation as I allowed a bit of drool to run from the corner of my mouth. Might as well carry the act all the way. I was not too surprised at the physician's statement.

 

"Physician, how did our King die?"

 

"He appears to have died as Sir Charles did. His heart gave out."

 

"Are you sure? There is no sign of poison?"

 

"None. Nor any marks of violence on his body. Our King died in his sleep and that poor idiot over there did not even know when it happened."

 

"Very well. We must prepare him for burial. I will send someone…"

 

"Milord, I would like to tend to the King myself. He has been kind to me this last year and I would be honored to prepare him for his journey."

 

"Very well, Captain. Have him ready for viewing by noon. I will have a grave dug for him."

 

"Surely, milord he will be placed to rest in the family crypt?"

 

"Do you think that is where he should be?"

 

"Yes, milord."

 

I was almost foaming at the mouth by this point. The Captain was betraying us. Once the crypt was opened they would find Sir Charles out of his coffin and dead on the floor and the bell cord cut. I itched to get my hands on him.

 

As soon as the room cleared of all but the Captain and myself I charged him. Catching him off guard, my fist connected and he hit the floor.

 

"Walter, what is wrong with you?"

 

"The crypt – you know what they will find in the crypt." I stood over him breathing fire and he had the good sense to stay where he was.

 

"It will be easier to awaken him and leave from there. They will find nothing amiss, Walter."

 

"The bastard must have come around weeks ago. He would have tried the cord and then he would have yelled to be freed."

 

"Yes, he did yell, and scream and finally he begged."

 

"What?"

 

"Walter, I went to the crypt every night. Each night I called out until he answered. At first he expected to be rescued. He was quite angry when I laughed at him."

 

"You – I don't understand."

 

Alexei had failed to tell me why he trusted the Captain, so I was genuinely at a loss.

 

"He raped my sister, she died trying to birth his son, he then killed his own son. You and Alexei have helped me get my revenge."

 

"So you taunted him?"

 

"Yes, every night until he died. They will find nothing wrong in the crypt. I even put in a new bell pull."

 

I stood staring at the man who even then blazed with hatred. Reaching out, I offered him my hand. As I pulled him up I spoke from my heart.

 

"Thank you, for telling me. I knew it would be an unpleasant death, but I too wanted more. Captain, may I know your name?"

 

"I do not like my name, but with you I will share it. My mother named me Fox for the one she saw through the window as she labored with me. She felt he was there to witness my birth."

 

"Fox, thank you again. I am sorry I hit you."

 

"I understand. Now we must get milord laid out for viewing."

 

"Yes, since there are the two of us we can use the pool, it will be faster."

 

We cleaned Alexei and dressed him in the finest clothing available. By noon he was displayed in the drawing room. That was one of the longest days of my life. I watched with a vacant look on my face as a line of people filed past him. Many reached to caress his face or hand. I even saw a few tears.

 

I was relieved when the house was closed for the evening. The Captain and I talked for several hours, making plans for after Alexei was laid to rest.

 

The next day was cloudy, the type that would bring rain before the afternoon. No one questioned my walking next to the Captain behind the King's bier. I suppose they did not expect me to be capable of coherent speech.

 

When they started to enter the tomb with him I screamed, threw myself after him, clutching his body. The Captain and several other men pulled me off. I sat on the ground wailing as his body was placed inside and the doorway closed. I allowed the Captain to lead me away.

 

After the ordeal of the last days, I was so very tired that Fox and I decided I should sleep. My lover would be safe where he was for long enough for me to rest. Once we were on the road, we would travel as far as the horses could manage the first day.

 

I slept almost around the clock. Refreshed, I was ready to wake Alexei. I packed the few things I wanted to take with me, my canvasses rolled and placed in protective coverings. The one piece of jewelry that Alexei's mother had never parted with was tucked in with the clothing the Captain had brought for him.

 

At midnight the Captain came for me with the horses. I loaded the items I was carrying with the extra foodstuffs he had packed for us. He had even wrapped the horse's hooves so we would make less noise. At the cemetery, he opened the door as I hurried to prepare the antidote.

 

The moon had risen, light streaming in the door as we lifted his body from the coffin. Fox held him upright for me to let the mixture trickle into his mouth slowly. When the last had made its way into him, we let his body rest back as I went to get the clothing.

 

By the time he started to respond we had him dressed for the journey.

 

*********

 

I awoke to the low sounds of voices. It took a moment for them to make any sense. Then I felt hands touching me, big hands, Walter's hands.

 

"Alexei, can you hear me? You need to wake so we can ride."

 

"It worked."

 

My throat was so dry it was little more than a croak. Walter's chuckle was joined by the Captain's soft laugh. Then I was lifted and a cup of water was being held to my lips. I sipped, grateful for the moisture.

 

"Walter, it really worked."

 

"Yes, 'Lexi, I would not have done it if I was not sure. We should get you up. It will take a little time for you to feel yourself again."

 

They moved to either side of me and lifted me to my feet. I sagged between them, as they tried to walk me toward the door. It took several minutes before I felt competent to walk on my own. They watched as I walked several steps away and then turned to walk back.

 

"Are you ready to ride, Alexei?"

 

"Yes, we should not linger."

 

I watched as Walter turned to the Captain, holding out his hand. The Captain pushed it aside and wrapped Walter up in a hug. A flash of jealousy stabbed through me until they stepped back. Walter's eyes were instantly on me as he smiled.

 

"Go you two, I will set things to rights here. I wish you long life and much happiness."

 

"Fox, if you ever change your mind, you will have a place with us."

 

"We shall see if Sir Jeffery is a better man than his brother. If not, I may show up there one day."

 

"I have an unmarried brother and a sister. Mayhap one of them might be to your liking."

 

My mouth dropped open at that. Obviously, I still had things to learn about my lover. The Captain laughed before he answered.

 

"Is he bald as well?"

 

"No, John has lots of hair, but he would shave it for one such as you."

 

They shared another laugh as I looked from one to the other wondering when they had become such friends. Walter moved closer to me, kissing me hastily, then offered a leg up. When I was seated, he mounted his horse quickly. A wave of his hand to the Captain and we were on our way.

 

We were a goodly distance from the village with the sun coming up before Walter called a halt. He led me deep into the woods, finding a stream before we made camp. You would think after being dead I wouldn't be ready to sleep again, but I was out as soon as he rolled us into a blanket.

 

I woke late afternoon to the smell of meat cooking. Walter was evidently a good hunter; two rabbits were roasting on a spit over the fire. I wandered off to relieve myself, and came back to find him stirring greens in a small pot. So hunter and gatherer, my lover was certainly a many talented man.

 

"How far have we come do you think?"

 

"We've made a decent start but I still want us to travel under darkness for at least two more days. Less chance of meeting anyone who knows who you are."

 

"I trust your judgement. Is the meal almost ready? Being dead makes you hungry."

 

"Yes, it is. Why don't you get the bottle of wine from the stream?"

 

I went in the direction he indicated and found the bottle wedged between two stones. Walking back to him, I admired the play of his muscles as he began to take apart the first rabbit. I accepted the plate from him and sat to eat. It was only when I realized he was watching me that I slowed down.

 

After we ate and cleaned up he pulled me back to the blanket.

 

"Walter, shouldn't we be getting ready to ride?"

 

"In a little while. Right now, I want to make love to you."

 

I suddenly thought that was an excellent idea. He undressed me slowly, kissing and biting each part of me as he uncovered it. By the time he moved to enter me, I was a quivering mass of sensations. I had enjoyed sex before Walter came into my life but no one had ever played my body as he did.

 

My climax was so intense; I shivered in his arms for long minutes afterward. Finally, I kissed the end of his nose and spoke.

 

"Being dead sure has its rewards."

 

"Well, I'll just have to make sure you keep receiving all the benefits you are entitled to. We need to get moving."

 

"Give me a minute longer so my legs will work."

 

He smiled, rose from our blanket and began to dress. I watched until he came back to me and swatted my thigh.

 

"Up, Lord, we have miles to cover."

 

I laughed with the sheer joy of being free, then scrambled up to get dressed. Our trip back to his county was long, sometimes difficult, but never boring. Now that we were free, we grew even closer. The walls we had kept up tumbled down. By the time we reached his home, I knew we would spend the rest of our lives together.

 

**********

 

I had not told Alexei of my deception regarding his aunt and cousin. To be honest, I was sure he would be ecstatic that they lived but angry with me for not telling him. So once we reached my homeland, I took him directly to the small cottage they had been given.

 

I could see the puzzlement on his face. By that point I had talked of my home enough for him to expect something grander. He opened his mouth to speak just as the door swung open and his teenage cousin Kimberly burst from the cottage.

 

He nearly fell from his horse, and she was jumping to throw herself into his arms. He twirled around swinging her out from his body as she giggled. I smiled at his aunt standing in the doorway waiting for them to finish their reunion.

 

Finally, he set her on her feet and turned to his aunt. I watched as he wrapped his arms around her carefully. When he pulled back both of them brushed at their eyes. Then he turned and glared at me.

 

"You bastard!"

 

"Alexei!"

 

"It's all right, Rose. He has every reason to be angry with me. I let him believe all these months that you were dead. I just could not risk telling you differently. Your grief needed to be believed."

 

"And why did you not tell me on the journey here?"

 

"I thought the trip would be long enough without your thinking of seeing them at the end."

 

"So, I am a child who needs protecting! Not a man to share your life!"

 

I slipped down from my horse and moved toward him. "Alexei, you are most definitely a man, the only man with whom I wish to share my life."

 

His hands were balled into fists so I stopped a few feet from him. If he wanted to hit me he would need to cross the space to do so. I would not bring it on by moving too close to him. His eyes blazed with a fire that had never been directed at me. My heart sank as he turned on his heel and entered the cottage.

 

I stood frozen to the spot until Rose placed a hand on my arm.

 

"Go see your family, Walter. Give him a little time to cool. I will help him understand that you sought only the safest way for us all."

 

"When he will listen, tell him I love him."

 

"He knows that. I saw the knowledge in his eyes when he brought you to meet us. His temper is hot now. He will get past it. He loves you too much to be long without you."

 

I bent and kissed her cheek before mounting my horse and riding toward my home. My sister greeted me in much the same way as Kimberly had Alexei. Olivia had indeed become a woman in the time I had been away. I put her back on her feet as John pounded on my back to get my attention.

 

"'Bout time you made it home, brother. One of the workers sent word that you were on your way in. Where is Alexei?"

 

"He is with his Aunt Rose. He is very angry with me."

 

"I wanted to meet him. Why is he angry?"

 

"Because I kept it from him that I had sent them here."

 

"Ah, brother, when will you learn?"

 

I was spared the need to answer that question by my mother's arrival on the scene.

 

"Walter, it is good to have you home."

 

I heard the relief in her voice as she hugged me. She did not ask about Alexei, which made me think that she had heard us talking. I looked at John over her shoulder to confirm that he had told her I would be bringing someone home. He nodded but I decided to get him alone as soon as possible to discuss what he had told her. I had no intention to hide him, but still did not wish to hurt my mother overly much.

 

"Come inside, you must be hungry."

 

"Mother, I am fine, no need to fuss."

 

"Walter, you have been away for over a year, allow me to spoil you a little."

 

She took one arm and my sister took the other. I allowed them to pull me inside and straight to the kitchen. John called out that he would see to my horse. I was seated at the table with a big glass of milk and an enormous slice of pie when he came in.

 

"I found these with your clothes, thought you might want to get them unrolled, maybe ready for framing."

 

"The countryside was beautiful there. I did a summer view and an autumn one."

 

"There are three canvases here, Walter."

 

"The third is a portrait of Alexei."

 

"This I must see."

 

John started to unroll the first, saw enough to know it was a landscape, and went to the next one. He unrolled the next one to stare at Alexei in all his finery as King. When John did not move or turn the canvas, Olivia moved around the table to look.

 

"Walter, he is beautiful." The awe in her voice told me I had done a decent job.

 

"It does not do him justice. I am not talented enough for that."

 

I watched as my mother joined them; her face shifted through emotions too quickly for me to catch them all. Finally, she looked at me.

 

"He is a fine looking man, Walter. Are you sure this is what you want?"

 

"Yes, Mother, I am very sure."

 

"It will not be easy, but then, you never ran from a challenge."

 

The relief that flooded me could never be described. I had come home ready to stay a short while, then move on with him if that is what it came to. But in just a few words my family had let me know that Alexei would be welcomed. All that was left was to get him past his anger.

 

A fortnight later, he still had not contacted me. I had sent messages, invitations to dinner, baskets filled with his favorite fruits, to no avail. I had not gone personally for fear we would come to blows. I do have a temper as well, and had learned long ago to stay away from those I love if there was a chance of its taking control.

 

I did however, start work on a cottage for us, midway between the main house and the cottage his aunt was living in. I refused to believe that it might never be needed.

 

I was growing depressed over the situation when my brother took it upon himself to take action.

 

*********

 

I had been in the cottage with my aunt and cousin for two weeks, weeks in which they had tried to cajole me out of my anger with Walter. I heard the reasons, even understood them, but I was furious that he had decided to take on the role of protector for me and mine. That he had judged me to be so incompetent that I would give away the ruse.

 

I was out working in the small garden when his brother John came to see me. I heard the horse, stood to work the kinks from my back as I watched him approach. I would not have picked him out as Walter's brother. Later, I would learn that John took after the maternal side of the family; Walter was the image of his father.

 

"Hello, Alexei. I am John, Walter's brother."

 

"Did he send you, since the charity baskets did not work?"

 

"You do not know my brother as well as you think if you believe that. No, he did not send me; I came on my own. I got tired of waiting for you to forgive him."

 

"That is between us. If he wants forgiveness he should be asking."

 

"I agree. But you see he does not feel what he did was wrong. And between us, he is a most stubborn man."

 

I bit my lip to stop the grin that tried to escape. Yes, my Walter is quite stubborn on a lot of things.

 

"So, what would you have me do? Throw myself at his feet? Pretend what he did does not hurt me? I do not wish to spend the rest of my life giving in to him. I may be as pretty as some women, but I am not one."

 

"I would never accuse you of being womanly. I will offer you this counsel: if you wish to get your way with my brother, approach him head on with your facts in order. He may be stubborn, but he is also logical and will see the merits of a well thought out argument."

 

"Any thoughts on how I go to him without bending knee?"

 

"He is working on a cottage for the two of you. It is a nice day for a ride especially in a northeasterly direction."

 

"You know that poor horse would probably appreciate a good workout. I think I shall take a ride this fine day."

 

"Alexei, I shall make a prediction – you will have my bear of a brother wrapped around your finger and back in your bed before the day is over."

 

"John, I will make one as well – you and I are going to be great friends."

 

"Well, you see that is one thing I never doubted. Anyone, who can inspire my brother to paint, as you did, had an inside track to my life. I need to head for home. You will come for dinner?"

 

"Yes, I will be there."

 

"A confident man is most appealing. Good day, Alexei."

 

I waved as he rode away, then hurried to get cleaned up and dressed for riding. I used the small amount of gillyflower-scented oil I had left to make me smell, as he likes. I had noticed the plants beginning to grow around the cottage and when I asked, Aunt Rose had told me he insisted she bring seeds with her. She also told me some had been added to his mother's garden as well. I had no doubt that they would be planted around the cottage he was building for us.

 

I packed a lunch, added a blanket then set out to find him. I took the direction John had indicated and after a while all I needed to do was follow the sounds of labor. I entered the small clearing in which he was building our cottage, and sat my horse quietly, waiting for him to pause in his work.

 

It was noon, the sun high, day getting warm. He was stripped to his waist. His muscles were gleaming with sweat, my cock rose in appreciation of all that delectable male flesh. It had been a fortnight since we had touched each other. I craved him, as I never thought I would crave anything.

 

My horse whickered and he turned at the sound. Our eyes met and he walked slowly toward me. I don't even remember sliding down from my horse. I barely remember jumping to wrap myself around him. Then his tongue was down my throat and I was riding him.

 

His hands squeezed my ass painfully; when I grunted he loosened them only slightly. Yanking my head back from his I hissed out.

 

"You are still not forgiven!"

 

"I understand."

 

Then his mouth was on mine again. We did not come up for air until the horse nudged against us. Laughing into my mouth, he slowly pulled back and lowered me to the ground. Without a word exchanged I took the blanket and lunch. He set the horse free to graze.

 

I had the blanket spread out under a shady tree when he came up behind me and wrapped his arms around me. His lips nuzzled my ear before he whispered.

 

"Can we have the make-up sex first and the conversation later?"

 

"Do not think you are getting out of a conversation by making me fly over the moon."

 

"The last fortnight has made me aware of your temper. I will never take that lightly."

 

"In that case you have permission to see just how hard you can make me climax."

 

I do not remember much of how he got me naked. His mouth was so hot, wet and greedy that for moments it was all I knew. When he moved over me and began making his way down my body I arched up to him. Reaching behind me, I grasped at the tree trunk wanting to give him free rein. Later, I would pick splinters from under my nails.

 

I do not believe he left any part of me unkissed. By the time he covered my cock with his mouth, I was speaking in something approaching tongues. I gasped as my legs were raised and he entered me. His climax was over far too soon, leaving me feeling bereft, until he immediately straddled me and impaled himself on me.

 

"Please…oh god…Walter…no not yet!"

 

But it was too late to make it last longer. He was bucking up and down on me so hard and fast, my cock could not contain the seed. What my mind wanted and what my body needed did not mesh at that moment.

 

His chuckle floated over me as my scream of completion ended. I reached out and tweaked his nipple hard enough to make him curse.

 

Pulling off me, he rolled to lie next to me panting loudly. After a time, I turned to find him staring at me.

 

"I am sorry, Alexei. My family tells me I do things with the right motive but without enough facts. I sought only to bring you all safely from that land, to give you a chance at a real life."

 

"I know that, Walter. What you must learn is that I am no child to be coddled. I am a man who can do what is needed."

 

"I can not promise to get it right every time. But I will learn if you will forgive me."

 

I rolled onto my side to press a kiss to his lips. Then sitting up, I reached for the basket.

 

"We should eat. Then we can work on *our* cottage together."

 

His smile was brighter than the sun.

 

Over the next few weeks we worked side by side to build our home. We made love on a blanket under the trees every afternoon. At night we went our separate ways, since neither of us felt we could abstain, nor were we willing to inflict our love life on our families.

 

When the day arrived that the house was finished and our bed was installed, we celebrated by making that new bed sing. By the time we came up for air we were both raw.

 

On the Saturday after the house was finished, the families descended on us to bring food and other items to make our house more a home. Many of the workers and neighbors came as well, and soon we had a party going. Loins of meat were roasting on a spit over a hastily dug pit; the women were making the side dishes that could not be prepared beforehand.

 

A band played so that anyone not involved in getting dinner ready could dance. Walter and I were dancing to a lively song when the music trailed off. Turning to follow the stares of the musicians, we watched as Fox slowly raised a hand in salute before falling from his horse.

 

John beat us to him by just a few seconds. Walter's worried voice caused John to look up at him.

 

"Fox!"

 

"You know him, Walter?"

 

"Yes, this is the man who helped us escape."

 

"Walter, I'll turn down the bed, you and John get him inside."

 

I ran to the house, not waiting to see if they followed my orders. I had the bed ready when they came through the door with him. He moaned as they placed him on the bed, then seemed to sink into a stupor.

 

"John, please tell everyone to continue. No need to stop the party and we still need to eat. Walter and I will see to our guest."

 

"Alexei, Mother has some knowledge of doctoring, should I send her in?"

 

"Let us get him undressed and cleaned up a little. It may just be exhaustion. Have someone tend his horse, will you?"

 

**********

 

I watched as my brother left the room to see to our guests. Alexei and I worked together to get Fox undressed. His clothing was stuck to his back, and we turned him to find dried blood in strips across it. Our eyes met above him and we knew he had been whipped.

 

"I'll get some warm water, Lexi."

 

"And the herbs to ease the pain."

 

By the time I got back, Alexei had him naked, except for the dried-on shirt. A sheet was pulled up to his waist. I set the basin down, handing a still fairly wet cloth to Alexei, I took the other and we covered his back.

 

"I guess my Uncle Jeffery isn't any better than his brother."

 

I was already mixing the herbs into a salve for his back. I had no words to answer that. We would need to hear what Fox had to say before we knew the truth. Alexei lifted the edge of one of the cloths and checked to see if the blood had softened enough to get his back bare. Dropping it back down, he turned to look at me.

 

"I asked Mother to make some broth. I don't think we should try to give him anything else when he comes to. John said his horse was in pretty bad shape. He has one of the boys cooling him down and then he will feed and water him."

 

"I wonder how he found us?"

 

"I gave him directions before we left but they would have led him to the main house. Of course there would still be folks around there finishing up chores before they head over here for dinner."

 

We sat beside him and waited for the warm water to do its work. When next Alexei rose to check, the cloth came up easily. Getting the wet shirt off him, we tended his back. A few of the marks had started to heal but the deeper ones were infected. My Mother entered the room just as we got the last of the wounds covered.

 

"Walter, I have the broth ready. Has he wakened?"

 

"No, Mother. I think he might not for some time. It looks as if he traveled hard and rested little to get here."

 

"Who is he, Walter?"

 

I saw that John and Olivia had entered and were waiting.

 

"This is Fox, the Captain of the guards who helped me get Alexei free."

 

John moved closer, "Walter, do you think he was followed? Should I set a watch?"

 

"I think he would have gone somewhere else if he thought he was being followed, but set watch just in case. And, John, see that they know to report only, I won't have anyone hurt if it can be stopped."

 

John nodded and hurried from the house. I soon heard horses going off in the direction from which pursuit, if any, would come. My Mother moved past me to lean over and press her cheek to Fox's forehead.

 

"He is a little warm, Walter."

 

"Yes, several of the wounds are infected."

 

"Olivia, go to the house and get my medicine kit."

 

Olivia hurried off to do as she was told. Then Mother turned to me.

 

"You two, go outside. You have guests and this is your day. I will see to him."

 

"But…"

 

"Do not argue with me, Alexei. He is not going anywhere and if he wakes, I will come for you."

 

"No use to argue, Lexi. She will just swat you with a spoon."

 

I smiled, as my lover gave my Mother a strange look. Taking his hand, I pulled him out into the sunshine. Raising my hand for silence I told everyone what was going on so that no strange stories would be circulated.

 

"I know you are wondering about the visitor. He is from Alexei's homeland. He helped us survive and then leave the country. Until he wakes, we will not know why he came here or how he was injured. So, since my Mother has things with him well in hand, and we have a watch set for strangers, let us get on with the party."

 

We moved among our guests, and after some little time Alexei relaxed. I was able to coax him back out to dance. When the sun was nigh setting, we all gathered to eat. The first to finish dinner went out to relieve the watchers so they could come and eat. I saw Mother across the yard sitting with her plate and went into the cottage to check on Fox.

 

John was sitting next to the bed, slowly wiping a damp cloth over Fox's sweaty face.

 

"John, has he stirred?"

 

"No. Mother thinks he probably will not before tomorrow."

 

"Want me to sit with him, so you can go and dance a jig?"

 

"No. I have not been here long. I can look after him."

 

"Then I will get back to the guests."

 

"He is quite striking, Walter. Are all the men from Alexei's homeland so?"

 

"No, not all. Fox and Alexei are the cream of the crop. He is a good man as well as handsome."

 

"I will come for you if he wakes."

 

"Thank you, John."

 

It was late before the party wound down. Alexei had gone in earlier to offer to sit with Fox but Olivia had taken over from John. Finally, only immediate family was left, so we all gathered in the parlor.

 

"Walter, his fever is down. I checked his back and the salve is starting to work, a good deal of the redness is fading. I think he will wake tomorrow."

 

"Good, we are anxious to know what happened with him."

 

"I guess we should head for home. John, you should stay here with your bother in case extra hands are needed."

 

"Mother, I think John should be with you tonight."

 

"Nonsense. If anyone comes we will have warning. I will come over in the morning to check on him."

 

Rose spoke then. "Walter, if you are concerned, then Olivia and Sharon could stay with Kimberly and me tonight."

 

I turned to my mother then; "Please do that, Mother. If pursuit comes it would reach your house first."

 

"You are a bigger worrywart than your father was. All right, we shall stay the night with Rose. Now you boys try and get some sleep."

 

"Yes, Mother."

 

John and I chorused in the singsong of childhood. He was closer so he got the swat.

 

"Ouch!"

 

When they were gone, we made a pallet on the floor of the parlor. We would divide up the night, each of us watching over Fox for a time. Alexei took the first watch. When he came to wake me I was hugging John, who had slept through it.

 

"Should I be jealous, Walter?"

 

"No!" I hissed as quietly as I could. "You know you are the only man I have ever wanted that way. It was just habit."

 

"Maybe I should take this watch since I'm awake now. No need to worry, Alexei. Walter always did need something to hold on to. He had a favorite blanket as a child. Guess you gave him a different type of security blanket."

 

"Brother, you are not long for this world if you do not stop telling my secrets."

 

John scrambled up and headed for the bedroom door.

 

"Have to catch me first."

 

Alexei chuckled and lay down next to me.

 

"Think we can sneak in a quiet session?"

 

"Not with Mr. Big Mouth in the next room."

 

Alexei gave me a deep kiss and we rolled together and went back to sleep. I woke with the sun in my eyes, a stiff back and wondered why I was on the floor. Then I remembered. I pulled carefully away from Alexei and went to the door of our bedroom.

 

John was sitting in the bed with his arms wrapped around a sleeping Fox. John's eyes opened when I touched his shoulder.

 

"He had a nightmare. I could not get him to calm until I held him."

 

Fox's eyes opened and he rasped, "Walter, is it really you this time?"

 

"It is really me. I will bring you something to drink."

 

Fox raised his head to look at John, "Who are you?"

 

"Fox, this is my brother, the one I told you about."

 

"John, right?"

 

"Yes."

 

"John, why are you holding me?"

 

I chuckled and went off, leaving John to answer him. Alexei was stirring on our pallet on the floor.

 

"Alexei, he is awake. I am going to get water for him."

 

"He will have to wait to see me until after I take care of nature."

 

"Probably best. Give John a chance to finish explaining to Fox why he woke up in John's lap."

 

"I am not going to ask."

 

"Again, probably a good idea."

 

As I stepped outside to get fresh water from the well, one of the hands jumped to his feet.

 

"Aaron, why are you here?"

 

"Your mother thought someone should be here first thing in case you needed her."

 

"I see. Well, go and get them. Tell them he is awake, and we will get some breakfast into him and wait to hear his tale until they are here."

 

He hurried off to do as bid.

 

**********

 

After I emptied my bladder, I headed back to see what was going on. John was coming from our bedroom, his face a little flushed. I smiled as I remembered what Walter had said about Fox being in John's lap. Walter came through the doorway with a bucket of water from the well before I had a chance to comment.

 

"All done explaining?"

 

"Yes, he would like something to eat, says he can not remember the last time he ate."

 

"You and Alexei can start breakfast, I'll see he has water. Aaron was outside so I sent him to fetch the women. I told him to tell them we would not ask for his story until they arrive."

 

John and I went to start the cooking and before long Walter was helping Fox walk out to the kitchen. Walter had wrapped him in his robe and Fox was swimming in the extra material. But his clothing was a lost cause. We gave him tea to sip until everything was ready.

 

Just as we started eating, the women arrived. Walter's mother went straight to Fox and checked for fever. He gave her a startled look as she pressed her cheek to his.

 

"Fox, this is my mother, Sharon. And that is my sister Olivia and I think you know Rose and Kimberly."

 

Fox's eyes widened as he looked at them.

 

"I thought they were dead."

 

"So did I. I was not pleased that Walter kept that part of his plot from me."

 

"Lexi…"

 

"Shush you two. That is all water under the bridge. Now eat so we may hear Fox's story."

 

We quieted down and concentrated on breakfast. I had learned early not to back-talk Sharon; I had felt the end of her broom on more than one occasion.

 

When we had finished breakfast, Fox requested a chance to bathe before telling his story. Even though we were all anxious to hear, we appreciated his need to get clean. He did have a rather strong odor. When John offered to help him, Fox agreed and Walter and I shared a sly grin.

 

So we cleaned the kitchen while we waited. The ladies made up new bandages and more salve for Fox's back. All things considered, it was almost lunchtime before he was settled in a chair in the parlor and ready to talk.

 

~~~~~~Fox's Tale~~~~~~

 

 

A few days after you left, Sir Jeffery arrived. He does not have Charles' bad habits but he does share a certain coldness with him. I did, however, think it might work out so I continued my duties.

 

Everything went well for some time and I became complacent. I even failed to worry when one of the Elders brought you up, Walter. Jeffery questioned where you had gone and the Elder looked to me.

 

I told him you had disappeared the night after Alexei had been interred and I feared that in your mental state you had been killed in the woods. When asked if we searched for you, I stated that I had not been ordered to search.

 

I should have left that night but he seemed to accept my story and the Elder offered no opinion on the subject. Things went on for some time with Jeffery slowly taking over all the businesses Charles had owned.

 

He allowed everyone to continue the jobs they were currently working and it seemed for a time that he would be a better man than his brother had been.

 

The day we were shopping in the bazaar and he pointed out a boy he wanted for his bed, I knew I could not continue. When I failed to bring the boy to him that night, he punished me. Not as severely as he could have, and I accepted it as a just price for giving the boy and his family a chance to flee.

 

It was a week later that he ordered a group of guards to prepare for a ride. I led them, as that was my place still. I was surprised when he rode toward the cemetery. He had been back for months and had not gone at any time to pay his respects.

 

I admit to a certain panic when he wanted the tomb opened. But I braved it out, not expecting him to do more than say a prayer beside the coffins. When he started to pry open his brother's coffin I began to worry.

 

I asked what he was doing, and he indicated that he wanted any jewels that had been buried with his brother. I considered lying but was afraid he would hear the truth from an Elder if he did not already know.

 

I was not too concerned about the fact that Charles had not actually died when it was thought he had. As I told you, I had put things to right after his actual death. So I stood silently as the body was stripped of the jewelry.

 

When he turned toward Alexei's coffin, I tried to stop him. I told him you had not been bedecked for burial. Since you had been in line for the Summer King sacrifice and were a bastard as well, no jewels had been given to you.

 

He insisted on opening the coffin and I braced myself to lie. I feigned shock when the lid was lifted and all that was found in the box were your ceremonial robes laid out neatly.

 

I do not believe I am as good at acting as you two are. Or maybe Jeffery is better at reading deception. I even offered your name as a possible culprit. But Jeffery had me thrown in the dungeon.

 

He gave me a week to ponder my fate before he questioned me again. This time with the help of the guard who whipped you, Walter. I stuck to my story, and they left me alone again. Another week passed before he had me dragged into the square and beaten. As they cut me down, the announcement that I would be executed with the dawn was read.

 

My cousin was assigned to bring me my last meal and he helped me to escape. He rode in one direction, I in another. I took a circuitous route to get here and covered my tracks as often as possible. I do not believe we have anything to fear, but I would still suggest that your people be vigilant for a time.

 

As soon as I heal I will move on if you like, although I would like to say here, as you offered, if you feel it is safe.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

We had all kept still as he talked, until his last words. Walter exploded from his chair.

 

"I should have stayed long enough to kill him as well. Best for the line to die out and new blood to take over."

 

"Walter, do not be so blood thirsty. After all, Alexei is of the same bloodline."

 

"Mother, trust me, my Lexi is nothing like his uncles."

 

My heart soared with his words. The simple statement told me, more than any other that he harbored no ill will for how our relationship had started.

 

"Fox, Walter did not make the offer lightly. I have learned he is a man of his word. You will stay for as long as you wish."

 

The others joined in with similar statements. Fox nodded with a smile.

 

Sharon stood up then and checked him once more for fever.

 

"It is time Olivia and I got home, we have chores to do. Walter would you like me to have John bring over the cot that we use for extra guests?"

 

John spoke before Walter could respond. "Fox could stay with me. Walter and Alexei have lots of work to complete here at the cottage and I have a little time on my hands."

 

I watched Sharon's eagle eyes pierce her son as he flushed. Fox was doing a little blushing of his own. Walter abruptly turned on his heel and left the room, his shoulders shaking. I made a decision to find out exactly what Walter had seen in our bedroom that morning.

 

"Ladies, why don't you all head for home, we'll work out sleeping arrangements for Fox. I think once he has a few meals in him and the salve has a chance to work, he will recover quickly."

 

Walter walked out in time to follow his Mother out with instructions on who should be set to watch. All too quickly it was the four of us men left alone again and the silence descended.

 

**********

 

We sat in silence until I could take it no longer. So I said something I knew would cause my brother to speak, if not try and hit me.

 

"So, John, are you considering the type of living arrangements your brother enjoys?"

 

"Walter, keep still."

 

"But, John, did you not say he was 'striking'?"

 

"Brother, tread carefully."

 

Fox was staring at us, his eyes moving from one to the other as his face flamed again.

 

"Walter, I do not wish to be a burden to you, or John. Just give me a blanket and I can sleep by the hearth until I am well. You and Alexei do not need to fuss over me."

 

"Fox, you will learn that this teasing is their standard form of conversation. Ignore them, that is what I do."

 

"I think Fox needs lunch. Alexei will you help me get the meal ready? I am sure that John can watch over Fox."

 

Alexei followed me out to the kitchen and we left John to dig his way out or farther into the hole I had started for him. As soon as we were away from them Alexei turned to me.

 

"Tell me, Walter."

 

"Tell you what?"

 

"What was going on when you checked on them this morning?"

 

"John says that Fox had a nightmare and would not calm until he held him. John was leaning against the wall with Fox between his legs and he was holding him tightly to his chest."

 

"Has John ever expressed interest in a man?"

 

"No, but then I never felt interest in one until I met you. Must be something about the men from your country. Or its those damn gillyflowers."

 

"Yes, it is a deep secret that the smell from the plants makes men do things they never thought they would. And it was so nice of you to have Aunt Rose bring them here so that I may keep you in thrall."

 

"Lexi, flowers or no you will never be free of me."

 

"That pleases me more than words can express."

 

I pulled him close for a long kiss, only pulling back when I heard John clear his throat.

 

"Yes, brother?"

 

"Fox asked if he may be allowed wine with his food."

 

"One glass only."

 

"I will tell him."

 

"John."

 

"Yes, Alexei?"

 

"I think you should plan on taking Fox to your cottage after we eat. Walter and I have things to take care of this afternoon."

 

"It has only been one night for heaven's sake."

 

"After Fox has cast his spell on you I will remind you of this conversation."

 

I watched John, as Alexei's words penetrated. The red cheeks were back and he turned to leave us without any other comments.

 

"I thought I was the only one allowed to tease my brother."

 

"But he is my brother as well now, is he not?"

 

I chuckled, then gave him another kiss and a swat on his ass. When we entered the parlor with a tray, John and Fox were sitting very close together on the settee. I refrained from comment, as did Alexei. We talked of what Fox could do to earn his way once he was well and John assured him that he could stay with him as long as he wanted.

 

We waved goodbye to them a short time later and went to reclaim our bed. Our coupling was frantic after only one night of abstinence; it made me wonder what we would be like after a longer period of denial.

 

John sent us daily updates on Fox's recovery. It was about a week before I saw him again. It is a vision that will never leave me.

 

It only took Fox a week to ensnare my younger brother.

 

I had gone to check up on Fox, partly because Alexei was working on his garden, and I had no real chores to occupy me at the time. It was a beautiful day, so I expected to find the two of them outside. When I saw no sign of them, I assumed that Fox might be napping and John had gone to visit Mother or take care of business.

 

So I entered the cottage quietly. I could hear the sounds almost as soon as I stepped through the door. A low moan followed by quiet words that I could not quite make out. At that point I should have slipped out as quietly as I had entered, but the urge to know was too great.

 

So moving as stealthily as if I were hunting, I made my way to the door of the bedroom. It was not closed completely, so I could get a good view without pushing it open.

 

There, in the center of his bed, knelt my brother. Fox was on his knees as well, his arms wrapped around John from behind. As I watched, Fox's hips flexed and he pushed up hard into John. My cock stirred at the sheer beauty of them together. I wondered if my face held such ecstasy when Alexei took me in that fashion.

 

The moan I had heard before rolled out again, to be followed by one word. "Please!"

 

"Whatever you need, John."

 

Then Fox bent his head and fastened onto the spot where neck and shoulder meet. As I watched, Fox's hands moved over John's chest, rubbing at his hard nipples. I reached down and adjusted my own erection. I knew it was wrong to continue watching, but I could not move.

 

Fox pulled back and my eyes dropped to see their connection. Another similarity to add to the others between Fox and Alexei. Long, thick, a perfect tool to drive a man wild. John whimpered and pushed back toward Fox.

 

Fox chuckled and slammed in all the way. I could hear the slap of flesh against flesh as his balls connected with John. He began to move in earnest then, his strokes going deep inside, as John's cries became more needy.

 

I caressed my cock through my clothing, wanting to reach completion. But somehow, I felt that would be a betrayal to Alexei, so I forced my hand away. Fox's movements had become jerky in a way that told me he was nearing climax.

 

Suddenly he bent his knees and surged upward so hard that John was lifted slightly from the bed. I watched as John screamed and his seed shot from his body. Fox cupped his head and turned him for a kiss. Fox's hips moved as if trying to force more of his body inside John.

 

When their kiss ended, Fox murmured something in John's ear that I could not make out, but it brought a smile to my brother's face. His eyes opened then and he looked right at me. All color left his face, as he gasped out my name. Fox turned his head, going a similar shade of white.

 

I, being the brave soul that I am, decided to leave before they had a chance to realize how much watching them had affected me. I ran out and mounted my horse, heading for home and the man who could scratch my itch.

 

**********

 

I was washing up after working in the garden all morning when Walter rode into the yard. He jumped down, swatted the horse toward the pasture and ran toward me. I would have been alarmed if I had not seen that look in his face before. For some reason my man was in the mood and I never say no to that mood.

 

He grabbed for me as soon as he was within reaching distance, and I was thoroughly kissed, as he started walking us toward the house. The third time we stumbled, he came up for air and lifted me off my feet.

 

"Walter, what is going on?"

 

"Talk later. Bed now."

 

Caveman language indicated he was in no mood for waiting and meant a good, hard, fast ride. Good thing I was already partially undressed. I helped get him undressed as he pawed at me. His nails would leave marks down my back and chest.

 

He barely had the presence of mind to use oil before he entered me. By that point, I had learned to relax around him, so I didn't need a lot of lubrication, but I did need some. He had positioned us so that I was straddling his thighs, my hands helping with leverage by gripping his shoulders.

 

His hands roamed over me and we rocked furiously against each other. Finally, his hand wrapped around me and he pulled hard at my cock.

 

"Come, Lexi. Come now!"

 

I obliged him as he thrust up as hard as possible to deliver his seed into my body. I dropped my head to his shoulder and panted softly until my breathing was normal.

 

"Where the hell did that come from?"

 

"I walked in on John and Fox."

 

My mind was still a little befuddled by the climax I had just been given, so I did not get his point.

 

"What were they doing?"

 

"They were naked, in the middle of John's bed. Fox has seduced my brother."

 

I pulled back to look at him, not knowing if he was all right with the whole idea. I, myself, had known that they would get to that point eventually. I had just hoped that neither of them would be hurt by it.

 

"How do you feel about that? Aside from the fact that it obviously got you raring to go."

 

"They looked beautiful together. If it is my brother's destiny to love a man, then he has chosen the second best one to love."

 

"Second best?"

 

"I have the best and I do not intend to share."

 

Before we could continue the conversation, a shout rang out in the yard.

 

"Walter, Alexei, are you there?"

 

"I guess Fox has better manners than you do."

 

I scrambled off Walter's body, frowning at the flow of liquid down my legs. I went to the door and called out.

 

"Fox, I will be out in a minute, please wait there."

 

I turned back to see Walter up and wiping at his body with a cloth. Pointing at the bed, I ordered.

 

"Get back there and wait for me. I want a rematch."

 

He grinned and lay down to wait for me. I took the cloth he had used and wiped myself clean, then pulled on clothes. When I reached the yard, Fox was sitting on the bench underneath the walnut tree. He stood as I approached him with a hangdog expression on his face.

 

"Is Walter so angry at me he will not even face me?"

 

"Angry? Why would he be angry?"

 

"Angry at what he saw happening between John and me. He ran out so quickly that I was sure it was so he would not kill me. That is why I waited a little time to come over here."

 

"You did not force John, did you?"

 

"No! I would never force anyone. But John isn't completely sure this is what he wants."

 

"Do you not remember how my relationship with Walter started? You helped tie him down for me. I know it was you, none of the others would have protected his wrists."

 

"I remember. That is why I thought he might think I had forced John in some way."

 

"He is not angry. He told me that you are beautiful together."

 

"He did?"

 

I laughed at the surprised look on his face.

 

"Yes, he did. He also said that if his brother were destined to be with a man, then at least he would have the second best one."

 

"I guess I do not have to ask who is the best. But then why did he run off without a word?"

 

"Because he wanted to give me a demonstration of what you were doing."

 

I smiled at his blush. I slapped his back as I led him to his horse.

 

"I do not mean to be inhospitable, but Walter is waiting in our bed naked, and it is my turn. Also I am sure that John is worried about this visit, so go home to him. Bring him back for dinner."

 

"I am not sure I can call it home. He is very troubled about the whole thing. He may just be infatuated and will grow tired of me."

 

I became concerned at the sadness in his voice. "Fox, do you love him?"

 

"I have not known him long enough…"

 

"Nonsense! I have loved Walter from the moment I first saw him. Do you love him?"

 

"So much it hurts even to think of him throwing me out."

 

"Then, take my council, go slowly, be patient, allow him to see your heart. Do not push for more than he offers. If he is anything like his brother, soon he will be offering you all that you desire and more."

 

"Is that how it was with you and Walter?"

 

"Yes, the less I asked for, the more he gave."

 

"Thank you, Alexei. What time should we be here for dinner?"

 

"Give me at least until the sun is low. I will cook something special."

 

I watched as he mounted his horse and rode away. Letting out a whistle, I went to unsaddle Walter's stud and lead him into the corral. Then I headed back inside to find Walter curled on his side napping. I joined him on the bed and slipped into sleep. My turn could wait until later.

 

I woke much later to the feel of a tongue sweeping over my nipple. I pushed at him, getting him on his back. Kneeling over him, I smiled as the afternoon sun bathed his body in gold.

 

"You went to sleep before I came back."

 

"You tire me out when you attack me that way." His grin was way too smug.

 

"I seem to remember you being the one in charge."

 

"Ah, but you like me to be in charge sometimes."

 

"That I do. We must talk, Walter. I told Fox to bring John for dinner. I promised a special dinner so we do not have time to linger."

 

Walter pulled me down toward him and took a quick kiss before he let me talk.

 

"So what did Fox have to say."

 

"First of all he thought you left because you were angry."

 

"Angry? Why would I be angry? After all I am in a relationship with you. If John wants the same kind of relationship that is certainly his decision."

 

"Fox looks up to you, Walter. Do you not know that? You are a strong man who made the best of a bad situation and even managed to help him get his revenge. He would want your approval for that alone."

 

"He and John do not need my approval. It was obvious that my brother wanted what was happening. He was definitely making no move to get away."

 

"Fox has only been here a short time, but it is long enough to see how close your family is. I can tell you I would have been just as concerned as he is if I had come into your life and a week later was sharing your bed."

 

"May I remind you that it was not even hours after we met before we shared a bed?"

 

"But I had almost a year to get you to love me before I had to face your family."

 

His brow wrinkled as he thought about my words. I could see the wheels turning and I waited for the light to dawn.

 

"So you are telling me I can not be my usual teasing self with my brother this night?"

 

"No, I am telling you that you should let them both know they have your approval."

 

"You really believe this?"

 

"Yes, Walter. Fox is as hopelessly in love with John as I was with you."

 

"Was?" He frowned and his eyebrow climbed toward the top of his head.

 

I decided a physical demonstration was more appropriate than words. Walter seemed to get the point quite well. So well that the only thing special about dinner was that it was the first of many the four of us would eat together over the years.

 

When John and Fox arrived, Walter immediately tried to make them feel comfortable.

 

"Fox, I understand from Alexei that you thought I was angry today. That was not the case. Watching you was not something I would normally do, although after being watched all those months I don't feel as shy about it as I once did. But you just looked so good together. I left because I was aroused and needed to get home to Alexei."

 

"Brother, you accept this?"

 

"John, I have been sharing Alexei's bed for over a year. I am not likely to tell the two of you that you should not or cannot do what I do every day. I want what makes you happy."

 

Fox stepped toward Walter, holding out his hand. Walter pushed it aside and hugged him. I watched John, looked at his eyes, saw the slight narrowing of them as Walter hugged longer than he felt was right. This too, I had suggested to him as they were riding into the yard that night.

 

I pulled John toward the table and let Walter lead Fox over. We sat down to the meal that we had thrown together.

 

"Fox, I know I promised a special meal, but someone distracted me. I hope you will find this acceptable."

 

For a few minutes nothing was said and then we all erupted into speech at once. That brought laughter and we progressed from there. During dinner I watched the two of them. Fox reaching out tentatively to touch, John allowing, but then pulling back when he saw either of us watching.

 

By the time I brought out fruit for our dessert, Fox had stopped trying to touch. So I began a not so subtle campaign of my own. I cannot tell you why I felt the need to help the relationship along. Maybe it was the desire to help the man who had helped give me a life with the man I loved. Or maybe it was just that I could see the feelings John was trying so hard to fight.

 

Love is never wrong; no matter for whom you feel it.

 

So I started to touch Fox, just his hand or arm, to emphasize my conversation with him. Walter at one point gave me a quizzical look so I nodded toward John. He grinned briefly and then he reached out to touch Fox's hand as if just seeking his attention. My Walter was learning to read my silent language quite well.

 

After we had finished eating Walter pulled Fox toward the parlor.

 

"John, would you help Alexei clear the table? I have a wine I want Fox to taste."

 

Walter was definitely working with me. I watched John as Walter took Fox's arm as he led him from the room.

 

"John?"

 

"Oh! Do you think they will save us some wine?"

 

I hid my smile from him as he made his excuse.

 

"I am sure they will."

 

**********

 

Fox waited until we were in the parlor before he spoke.

 

"What are the two of you doing?"

 

"What are you talking about, Fox?"

 

"All that touching, and then bringing me out here, leaving John to help clean up. The two of you have never touched me that way before."

 

"Did you see John's face?"

 

"What do you mean?"

 

"He did not like us touching you. John always was a possessive boy. I do not think growing to manhood has changed that a bit."

 

"You are trying to make him jealous?"

 

"I am trying to show him his heart. Now take this."

 

I handed him a glass of wine and poured one for myself. Then I joined him on the settee, making sure I was as close to him as John had been that first morning.

 

"Walter, I am not sure this is such a good idea. Things between us have been fragile since you saw us earlier today. He was reluctant to come here for dinner."

 

"Fox, trust me. My brother and I share one trait – sometimes we need to be kicked, before we get a point."

 

Alexei came into the room talking louder than normal. Seeing us on the settee he immediately headed our way and sat on the other side of Fox. We now had him pinned between us, leaving my brother no choice but to sit in one of the chairs.

 

"I decided I wanted cool water instead of wine. John, by all means help yourself to the wine. How is it, Fox?"

 

Alexei leaned in toward Fox, pretending to sniff the bouquet of the wine.

 

"Smells very good, but then I have learned that Walter is a good judge of wines."

 

"Alexei, did you get the dishes taken care of?"

 

"I decided to let them soak in the hot water. I will do them when our guests leave."

 

John was sitting across from us and he actually made a growling noise as Alexei patted Fox's knee.

 

"It is getting late; I think Fox and I should leave and allow you to retire. I am sure you need to be up early tomorrow, Walter."

 

I put my hand on the free knee and smiled at my brother as the smoke sprouted from his ears.

 

"I have no early plans. Alexei usually wakes me in a very warm manner and we linger a bit."

 

From the corner of my eye, I saw the blush climb up Fox's face. He was no doubt remembering just exactly how he had seen Alexei wake me. He shifted then and crossed his legs. In the process he trapped Alexei's hand between his thighs, as mine slid almost to his crotch.

 

John surged up from his chair, toppling it over. He moved quickly to stand in front of us, reaching down, he grabbed Fox's hand sloshing wine all over him. Pulling Fox to his feet, John glared at the two of us.

 

"Mayhap you can spend your day as a slug-a-bed but I have work to do in the morning. Time to go, Fox."

 

"John, just because you have things to do does not mean Fox has to leave. He is still recovering, but staying up a little later will not hurt him."

 

John looked at Fox, seeming to notice the bulge in his trousers and then the flushed face.

 

"Walter, I never thought of you as the sort to go in for…"

 

"John. I have no idea what you mean. Fox and I are friends. He helped me save Alexei. I just enjoy his company."

 

John released Fox's hand and went to the door.

 

"Are you coming, Fox?"

 

Fox looked from John to each of us, clearly confused. I wanted to pet him like a puppy; he looked so lost.

 

"I am leaving, goodnight."

 

John stormed out the door and Fox went boneless, sitting back on the settee.

 

"I have no idea what to do."

 

"Well, if you stay here, he will think we bedded you, not the best solution. Follow him, now, Fox." I spoke gently as I nudged at him to rise.

 

"He is so angry."

 

"You have faced torture and a whipping. This is the man you made love to this morning. If he swings at you, grab him, hold on tight, and kiss him."

 

Fox looked at Alexei and shook his head in denial, but started toward the door.

 

I called out to him.

 

"Fox, one more thing – you should let him be in charge tonight. Might be a rough ride, but you may find you enjoy that. Our door is open to you any time you need to come here."

 

He nodded once more and walked quickly out the door. I reached for Alexei and he moved into my arms.

 

"Walter, I hope we did not push him too far."

 

"He is like me, mule-headed. You have to get our attention if you want something."

 

"You do not think John will really hit him?"

 

"Not if Fox does not let him. Come, we will clean up the kitchen, then you can tie me to the bed and pretend I am virgin still."

 

Alexei snorted as he let me pull him to his feet.

 

"Virgins do not relax when penetrated."

 

"I will tighten up and try to keep you out."

 

The next morning, as I worked in the garden with Alexei, Fox rode into the yard. We both smiled as he carefully dismounted. Walking slowly toward us he called a greeting.

 

"Good morning, Walter, Alexei."

 

"You look a little uncomfortable, Fox. Are you all right?" I asked as I watched him limp slightly.

 

"I should be fine, in a week or so."

 

"John, a little rough?" Alexei asked.

 

"Not rough, but enduring and frequent."

 

"Alexei, I think he is bragging."

 

"John is *your* brother. Fox is probably just telling the truth."

 

Fox held up his hand.

 

"Stop! Please. I just came over to let you know we reconciled. I am beginning to feel that it may work out."

 

"I am glad, Fox. Let me be the first to welcome you to the family."

 

"Let us not count our chickens yet. I must get back. I want to soak in a tub of warm water. He offered to have it ready for me when I got home."

 

"Feeling guilty."

 

Fox smiled and nodded.

 

"We will see you both on Sunday."

 

"Yes."

 

His movements were difficult so I moved forward to give him a leg up. He murmured, "Thank you." Then rode away.

 

Alexei's arms wrapped around me from behind.

 

"They are not over the rough times are they?"

 

"Probably not, but they are on more equal ground now. John will come around. I did, did I not?"

 

"Thank you, lord."

 

His lips caressed my neck before he released me. We went back to our work and our own thoughts. I felt sure that John and Fox would walk the same road, but like us, it was not destined to be always smooth.

 

**********

 

Over the next few months, there were nights when Fox slept on our floor. Of course, most of them ended with our being awoken as John came after him during the night. A few times John slipped in, and we knew he was there by the moaning, as he tried to make amends with sex and no words.

 

On those nights, we often peeked through the door if the candles were lit or the moon was full. I had to agree with Walter that they were beautiful together, and their reconciliations often led to incredible love making for us.

 

Then came a night when John didn't show up. Nor was he there at breakfast. Fox helped Walter tend the stock, looking tired and worn. By lunch we couldn't take anymore and asked what had happened.

 

"Fox, Talk to us. We want to help."

 

"You two do not need to get in the middle of this. It is bad enough that this is the only place I have to go."

 

"Fox, my brother is even more stubborn than I. Just tell me what happened. Mayhap I can talk to him."

 

"That will not help."

 

"How can you know, if I do not try?"

 

"Because this is part of the problem. He thinks I want you. That I am with him because you would not have me."

 

"Damn! Why would he think that?"

 

"He was being affectionate the other morning and I was responding in my sleep. But I was dreaming about the two of you. About one of the times I watched you and pleasured myself."

 

His face was bright red, giving me the urge to chuckle. We knew he had watched but not that he had 'pleasured himself'. I bit the inside of my cheek to keep back a smile.

 

"It is not unusual for a man to have dreams such as those."

 

"Walter, you don't understand, it was not the dream; it was calling out your name as I climaxed."

 

Walter groaned and dropped his face to his hands. I looked at Fox, seeing his misery.

 

"You did try to explain, I assume."

 

"Of course, I did, Alexei. He would not hear me. We ended up shouting at each other and I left when he raised his hand to me."

 

Walter's head snapped up, "He did not hit you, did he?" The look in Walter's eyes did not bode well if that had happened.

 

"No, but he would have if I had stayed. I do not believe that we could ever get past that if it happened."

 

Walter got to his feet; "I will go talk to him."

 

I reached out to grip Walter's arm. "Best not do that, Walter. Hearing you deny things will not help at this point."

 

"Then I will go and ask Mother to speak with him."

 

"Walter, do not involve your Mother, please. That would just be more evidence in John's mind." Fox pleaded.

 

Then the idea came to me that I should talk to him.

 

"Walter, sit!"

 

He looked at me startled. It had been some time since I had used the command voice on him. I almost smiled when his ass hit the chair.

 

"I will go talk to him as the other injured party."

 

"What?!"

 

They both looked at me with open mouths.

 

"Trust me. If he will listen to anyone right now it would probably be me."

 

"Alexei, he is my brother; I have known him all his life."

 

"Yes you have, but right now you are the other man. Let me try."

 

"Very well, but if he does not listen to you, I am going to reason with him as I did when we were boys."

 

I shook my head at him and headed out to saddle my horse. I let my mind go blank as I rode toward John's cottage. Trying to plan what to say never worked. Going by my instincts was the best method for me in most situations.

 

John was outside, currying his horse when I rode up. He looked even worse than Fox. Lack of sleep had left dark circles under his eyes. He said nothing, just waited. I dismounted, walked to the fence and spoke.

 

"Fox is at our cottage again. I am surprised that you have not come to collect him yet."

 

"He is where he wishes to be. Although, you might want to get back there and protect your interests."

 

"My interests? What do you mean by that?"

 

"He covets my brother."

 

I laughed, as John's scowl grew.

 

"Even if that were true, John, Walter is mine. I am the only man ever to bed him. No other ever shall."

 

"I would not be so sure. Now that you have taught him the pleasures, another man who wants him would be attractive."

 

"Flattering to him, yes, but not a threat to me. Fox is Walter's friend nothing more."

 

"Then why is it he called out my brother's name as he spilled his seed in my bed?"

 

"Dreams seem very real when they happen. Fox often saw us together when he was the Captain of my guards. No one can control dreams. Have you not had dreams of someone you would never approach? Someone who you feel only friendship for?"

 

The blush rising on John's face gave me an answer to that question.

 

"I hit him."

 

The whisper was so low I just caught it.

 

"He told us he left before that happened."

 

I immediately knew why Fox had lied about that. From the look in John's eyes, I knew he suspected.

 

"He…"

 

"He will forgive you, if you ask. But do not ask unless you are ready to commit to him as your brother has to me. He deserves no less than that."

 

"I love him, Alexei."

 

"Have you told him?"

 

"No."

 

"Why not?"

 

"It scares the hell out of me. What if he grows bored with me? He could have richer men, younger men."

 

"Now you sound like your brother! What is it with the two of you? Money, youth? If you make Fox as happy as Walter makes me, he will never stray. Money means nothing if your bed is cold at night. And callow youth cannot compete with a strong man who makes you soar with just a smile."

 

"You truly believe that? That Fox sees me as you see Walter?"

 

"Yes."

 

He sighed heavily.

 

"I need to bathe."

 

I smiled as I caught the delaying tactic.

 

"I will wait and we will ride back together."

 

I took a seat in the yard as he went to clean up. When he came out, I could see that he was nervous.

 

"John, you should not delay and let things fester longer. But only do this if you are sure. For I swear, should you hit him again, you will answer to me."

 

"If I do, I shall deserve whatever you do to me."

 

His smile was genuine. I waited as he saddled his horse and we rode toward home. Walter and Fox were in the garden when we rode up. I nodded toward the cottage and Walter nodded, before starting toward the corral. We unsaddled my horse and then went inside.

 

Neither John nor Fox moved until we entered the cottage. I am sure they knew we would watch. John slid down from his horse and walked to stand a few feet from Fox.

 

We could not hear the conversation. Fox stood with his arms crossed as John spoke to him. Slowly the arms dropped as Fox answered. Then John must have said the magic words. Fox literally threw himself at John. We smiled as John kissed Fox as if he never intended to stop.

 

"I guess my brother has a little sense left. Now, I won't have to go and kick his butt."

 

"I think they will work it out now."

 

I pulled Walter into a kiss and when we came up for air, John and Fox were gone, but Fox's horse was still in our corral.

 

Fox never again slept on our floor.

 

**********

 

Epilogue:

 

"Alex, that one has a very different feel to it."

 

"I know, Walter. I did some history research and I couldn't figure out the place or time period. There are so many anomalies. It is almost as if I dreamed this."

 

"But our accounts are too similar for it to be dreams. Especially the descriptions of John and Fox."

 

"A lifetime where Mulder and I got along. Who would have thought? Must have been some alternate Earth."

 

Walter grinned at me. "Not just got along, but considered each other friends. Maybe we should invite him and Scully over and play these for them."

 

"Don't push it, slave."

 

"Yes, Master."

 

But he looked anything but submissive.

 

"Naked, ass up, lubed, bed, now!"

 

"Is that a list, or an order?"

 

I growled; he chuckled before getting to his feet and heading for the stairs. I shut off the TV, locked up the house and followed him.

 

At the door of our bedroom, I stopped. Walter was on the bed, ass up, shoulders down, fingers busy in his ass. I smiled as my hand moved to the buttons of my jeans.

 

"Are you just going to stand there, or are you going to give me the high hard one?"

 

"And just were would you like the 'high hard one'?"

 

His head rose and he turned to grin at me.

 

"As far up my ass as you can stick it."

 

"That sounds like something I could manage, maybe."

 

It was my turn to chuckle as he growled. He was up and across the room, my clothes ripped in his haste to get me naked. Then he literally threw me on the bed. Before I could get my breath back, he was straddling me and dropping on my cock.

 

"That's it. That's what I want, need, crave." His voice rough, deep, sex drenched.

 

"Well then, ride my cock!"

 

He laughed loudly, bent to caress my tonsils with a hot tongue, then started to ride. It was hard and fast and the neighbor's dog howled right along with us. Afterward as we lay side by side panting, I thought back to the tapes. Maybe I could try a little harder to accept Mulder, but only if he quit making eyes at my slave. It was as if Walter read my mind.

 

"Always yours, Lexi, no matter what."

 

I reached for his hand, our fingers entwined, and soon sleep claimed us both.


	8. VIII: A Christmas Sacrifice

  
Author's notes: This is a Christmas gift but could be considered part of the Regression series.  
  
NOTES: Thanks to Bill. For my Maddie, thank you, for being you.  


* * *

He moved around the small room, making it neat as he waited for his lover to return. His mind drifted back in time, and he frowned slightly.

 

They had come to London three months ago. It hadn't been planned. Walter was the younger son of a Lord and Alex just the lowly stable boy. From the moment they met the pull had been there. Still, it had been over a year before Walter gave in to the desires he considered to be unnatural.

 

Their trysts had taken place in the loft of the barn, or in a secluded area at the far north end of the property. Alex hadn't expected more; for him the mere fact that Walter wanted him had been enough.

 

As time passed Walter lingered with him, instead of getting right up and going back to the manor. One warm afternoon they had taken their lovemaking further than ever before. Alex had fallen asleep still lying sprawled over Walter's back.

 

They woke to the sound of Walter's brother bellowing. Alex had been hit several times before they disentangled and Walter moved between Alex and his brother. Late that night Walter had come to the small room in the stable and told Alex they were leaving.

 

"Alex, he wants you gone from here. That is the only way he will forgive me."

 

"I understand, Walter. I will miss you."

 

"You do not understand, Alex. We are going away together."

 

"But where will we go?"

 

"Some place where no one knows us. I think London. I have the money my mother left me. That will get us a place to live and we can work."

 

"Walter, you are the son of a nobleman. You will grow to hate me if you leave your home because of me."

 

"No, Alex, my home is where you are. I love you. I know I have not said it, but I thought today proved it to you."

 

They had not even waited until morning. Walter brought out his things, and soon after they left, and had not looked back. In London they had found a place to live and began looking for work. The landlord and the others who lived in the house thought them to be brothers.

 

The money Walter had brought with him had kept them going for a short while. The work they could find kept a roof over their heads and food, but not much else. But the nights were spent in each other's arms, cries of pleasure being muffled against each other's flesh.

 

It was Christmas Eve, and Alex had stopped on his way home from the job he had gotten just a week before. His meager wages had been just enough to buy them some fresh fruit and a small sweet to celebrate the day. Dinner would be eaten at the boarding house table.

 

Walter loved to read, and the few books he had brought with him from home were carefully preserved. Alex enjoyed the evenings sitting next to Walter in their bed under the eaves as Walter read aloud to him.

 

Alex had passed a shop on his way home with his small bundle and saw a book in the window. The cover was of fine leather, and even though he could not read the title he could picture Walter with the book in his hands. Stepping into the store, he asked for the price of the book and knew the few pence he had left would not buy it.

 

He had only one thing of value, the watch his father had given him before he died. Pulling it from his pocket, Alex held it out to the shopkeeper. "Would you take this in trade for the book in the window?"

 

The shopkeeper had looked carefully at the watch and then nodded. "The book is yours, would you like me to wrap it for you?"

 

"Please."

 

Alex had hurried for home and their small room at the top of the house. He made sure the small hearth was laid with firewood and put a new candle in the holder by the bed. The wrapped book he placed under the small tree that Walter's employer had given to him.

 

While Alex arranged the fruit in a bowl, Walter was making his way through town toward home. He had a few coins left from his pay and bought chestnuts from a vendor in the street. Bypassing the street party that was moving through his normal route home, he passed a shop he had never seen before.

 

In the window was a beautiful watch fob. The gold gleamed in the light from the just-lit street lamp. Sure that he didn't have enough money to buy it; he nevertheless stepped into the shop.

 

"Excuse me, sir, how much are you asking for the watch fob in the window?"

 

The merchant quoted a price that Walter could not pay. "Thank you, sir."

 

"You have not the price?"

 

"No, would that I did."

 

"Would you have anything to trade?"

 

"The only thing I have are these. They were made for me but the best doctor in Manchester." Walter held up the spectacles that he wore only when reading to Alex in their room at night.

 

"I could probably sell those. I will swap with you."

 

"Thank you, kind sir. Would it be possible for you to wrap it for me?"

 

Walter made his way toward home, happy that he could give his lover a gift for this special night, the first Christmas of what he expected to be many. He climbed the stairs wanting to place the package underneath the small tree.

 

Opening the door to their small room, he found Alex bent in front of the hearth lighting the kindling for the evening fire. He slipped the small package under the tree before Alex turned from his chore.

 

Alex smiled as he straightened and rose to welcome Walter home. They shared a deep kiss in the cold room, and sat in the only chair as they waited for the fire to catch. Walter pulled the still warm chestnuts from his pocket and the two men shared them quietly.

 

By the time they finished, the kindling was burning brightly and Alex added some lumps of coal, then placed the screen in front of the small blaze.

 

"We should go down, dinner should be ready."

 

"Yes, as I was coming in, Mrs. Jones said it would be ready soon."

 

They enjoyed the feast that had been prepared by their landlady and after wishing everyone a joyous Yule they retired to their room. Walter went directly to the tree and that was when he noticed the larger package.

 

"Alex, what is this?"

 

"A gift for you, Walter. To show you how happy I am to be here with you, to celebrate our first Christmas together."

 

"Thank you, Alex. I have something for you as well."

 

Walter handed the small package to Alex and took the one for him. They unwrapped the gifts and looked at them in shock. Then Walter began to laugh.

 

"Why are you laughing, Walter?"

 

"Because I traded my glasses for the fob."

 

Alex gasped and then gave his lover a gentle smile. "I traded my watch for the book."

 

Walter pulled the smiling man into his arms and kissed him soundly. "Such love needs a reward, don’t you think?"

 

Alex's breathy reply was only one word, "Yes."

 

They placed the precious gifts to one side before carefully undressing each other. Getting into the bed, they snuggled close. Kisses rained over Alex's face as the two men strained against each other.

 

Walter reached for the small bottle of oil and Alex pushed him onto his back. Walter gasped with pleasure as Alex slicked Walter's member then straddled him. As Walter's thickness entered him, Alex sighed softly. Bending down, he pressed kisses on his lover's face.

 

"Never has anyone loved me as you do, Walter."

 

"Nor have I been loved this way."

 

Alex moved in a steady, slow rhythm on his lover, building the pleasure, loving the quiet sounds coming from Walter. After some time, Walter began to buck up under him and Alex increased the force of his body's movement.

 

Walter used his hand to pump Alex as they both worked toward climax. When Alex arched his back and sprayed Walter with his juices, Walter lifted his hips to impale Alex further. Spilling inside the heat of Alex's body, Walter cried out softly.

 

Alex dropped to lie full on Walter and Walter clutched him tightly.

 

"Joyous Yule, Alex."

 

"Joyous Yule to you as well, Walter. I love you."

 

"And I love you, Alex. More than I'll ever be able to show you."

 

Alex pressed kisses on Walter's lips, throat, eyelids and finally the tip of his nose. Tomorrow they would talk about the irony of the gifts. For tonight there was only this, the touching, loving worship of each other. It was indeed the most joyous Christmas in all of Alex's memory.


End file.
